Twenty-three

‘Are you sure you want to come here?’ Olivia asked Hadley as they walked towards the pub. ‘We could go somewhere less … well, Rankins Springs,’ she said, eyeing the crowd she could see through the open doors. She loved her little town, but there would be no privacy here; everyone would want to chat with Hadley and she wasn’t sure her friend was up to such public socialising.

‘This is exactly where I need to be, Liv. I need to get away from home and work and all the other places where people know me.’

‘Ah, Hads,’ Olivia said hesitantly, ‘everyone here knows you.’

‘Yeah, but they know me,’ she said, then gave a sad smile. ‘It’s different here, everyone knows me as Hadley Callahan, Bob and Lavinia’s daughter. In the city, I’m Hadley Callahan, the girl from TV. I just want to forget about that part for a while and be me again.’

It made sense. While she wasn’t famous like Hadley, Olivia did understand getting back to your roots. Whenever she’d come home for a visit, it’d always warm her to go to something like carols by candlelight or drinks at the pub because it was like she’d never left home. This community always welcomed back its own with open arms.

They were greeted by a few familiar faces as they made their way to the bar, stopping to chat as they went. They paid for their drinks and found a table in their usual spot, and Olivia saw Hadley relax as she spent a few moments letting her gaze touch on all the familiar fittings and photos around the pub. ‘It doesn’t change in here,’ she said quietly.

Olivia gave the room a quick glance and nodded her agreement.

‘I like that it doesn’t change.’

There was something sad in Hadley’s voice and Olivia suspected there was more going on with her friend than her recent loss. ‘Is everything okay, Hads?’

Hadley opened her mouth to answer, but before she could the seat beside her was pulled out and Griffin folded his large frame into the chair. ‘You made it,’ Hadley said, and Olivia noticed she avoided looking at her.

That sneaky … her thoughts trailed off as she caught Griffin’s eye and felt a flurry of nerves. She’d hated the way they’d left things.

There was a movement beside her as Ollie took the other seat at their table. ‘Sorry, I’m late. Had to fix a busted hose on the tractor,’ Ollie said, holding Hadley’s glance briefly before dropping his gaze and shifting in his seat.

Olivia caught his eye and sent him a look she was pretty sure he could translate—knock it off! He was supposed to be the buffer to keep things normal and he was acting weird.

‘I’m starving. How about we order something to eat?’ she said, jumping in quickly.

‘Sounds good,’ Ollie said, getting up. ‘I’ll go grab some menus.’ He disappeared before anyone had a chance to agree.

‘Is it just me, or does Ollie seem … I don’t know, nervous or something?’ Hadley asked, eyeing his back as he weaved through the tables.

‘Seems normal to me,’ Griff said and Olivia held his level gaze for a moment.

‘I think I’ll just go to the ladies,’ Hadley said, standing up. ‘No, you stay here with Griff, I won’t be long,’ she said when Olivia made to get up too.

‘I’ll never understand the need for women to go to the toilet in pairs.’ Griff shook his head as he reached across to lift his glass.

‘Safety in numbers,’ she said lightly.

‘What do you actually do in there?’ he asked.

‘I’d tell you, but then I’d have to kill you,’ she said haughtily.

She saw his brief grin and her pulse skidded a little. She missed him.

‘We need to talk,’ he said quietly.

‘You said pretty much everything the other night, if I remember correctly,’ she said lightly, unable to look at him. ‘You said you couldn’t live like that.’

‘I was upset, Liv.’

‘I know,’ she said calmly. ‘But I can’t do more than tell you that I know this thing with Cash isn’t an issue any more.’

‘It never was,’ he said, leaning closer.

‘Fine,’ she said. ‘I was being a jealous idiot, okay? Happy?’

‘I’m not happy. I’m miserable. I miss you,’ he said, sliding back in his chair, his shoulders slumping. ‘I just want it to go back to the way it was.’

‘I—’ She’d been about to tell him she missed him too, but Ollie chose that moment to return and pass out the menus.

Olivia was fairly certain anyone who didn’t know the four of them would assume this was a first double date, the way the conversation was so stilted and full of awkward silences. By nine-thirty, thankfully, Hadley decided to call it a night.

They walked outside after farewelling everyone they knew on the way through the pub, and the warm night air felt oddly refreshing.

As they reached Ollie’s car, Griff said, ‘Mate, do me a favour, take Hads home for me, will ya? Your sister and I need to sort a few things out.’

Olivia was too surprised to protest. She stared at her brother and best friend accusingly as they agreed without a blink of an eye, making Olivia suspect this had been prearranged.

‘I’ll call you tomorrow.’ Hadley gave her a hug, then slid into Ollie’s ute and shut the door, leaving her standing on the footpath alone with Griffin.

‘Was this really necessary?’ Olivia asked, shutting the door as she got into his car.

‘Would you have come willingly?’ he shot back, turning the key in the ignition.

They both knew the answer to that—probably not.

Olivia stared out the window, watching the shadows pass by in the darkness. The gentle hum of the tyres on the road provided a soothing backdrop, and the soft music playing on the radio eased the need for conversation. When they arrived back at her house, Olivia tossed her bag on the kitchen bench and kicked off her heels.

‘Coffee?’ she asked, not looking at him as she reached for the cups.

‘No. I don’t want coffee,’ he said, leaning over and taking the cups from her hand and putting them on the bench behind her. She could feel the warmth of his body pressing gently against her. He felt so good and smelled so tempting. He leaned closer and moved his lips against the side of her neck. She closed her eyes against the torment. He wasn’t playing fair at all. How did she stand a chance of remaining indifferent against this?

‘This doesn’t solve anything, you know,’ she said, trying to sound stern, but failing.

‘It solves a few things actually,’ he corrected her, moving his hands up her sides.

He had a point; it did solve the lonely ache she’d had since their fight.

After a few feeble attempts to remind him that this didn’t fix the underlying problem, Olivia gave up. She’d just wait till they got this out of their system and then they’d be able to be reasonable.

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Griff knew he’d missed Olivia, but until that first kiss, he hadn’t realised just how deeply it went. He couldn’t do casual—he knew that as soon as his lips touched hers. ‘We need to talk about this, Liv,’ he said, hating to break the fragile peace they’d found—that brief moment when all was perfect.

‘We did talk about it. Do we have to go over it all again?’

‘No, not about that, I mean about us. Where this thing is going.’ He felt her tense a little, but he refused to back away from it. ‘It’s important, Liv.’

‘I know,’ she said, sounding weary. ‘I just … I’m not sure.’

‘About what? Talk to me. If we don’t get all of this out in the open we can’t deal with it.’

‘It’s such a big … step.’

‘I know what I want. It’s what I’ve always wanted. You. A life together here, working the farm, raising our kids, growing old together. It doesn’t have to be complicated.’

He saw her lips twist slightly in response. ‘Anything can be made to sound uncomplicated. It’s when you have to apply it to real life that it gets messy.’

‘So tell me. Tell me what’s complicated.’

‘Well, for starters, a life here,’ she said bluntly.

‘But you love this place, you said yourself coming home was always the best feeling on earth.’

‘Yeah, it is, but that’s because it was my home and it holds all my childhood memories. I haven’t lived here for over a decade … my adult life has been in the city. That’s a lot to walk away from, Griff.’

‘You haven’t been happy for a while now, though, right?’ She glanced at him, then away again. ‘Me either. I’ve known something was missing for a long time. It’s the same with you—deep down you know you want a change. Maybe it’s time to come home.’

‘It’s easy for you, you’re not the one giving anything up.’

‘But if you’re giving up a life you’re not happy with, then it’s not exactly a bad thing, is it? There has to be a way to combine being out here with your work. The whole world is online now. It’s not like I’d be expecting you to give up your career.’

‘I’m not sure I’m ready for … this,’ she said, throwing her hands up and letting them fall back to her sides dismally. ‘When I was thinking of a change, I was thinking more along the lines of travel and adventure. I look at Hadley and I feel like I’ve done nothing with my life except study and work.’

His heart sank at her words. If she wanted adventure and excitement, this was probably the last place on earth she’d want to move to. Disappointment flooded through him. He’d really thought she’d want a life with him the way he wanted one with her. ‘I don’t think Hadley’s life is as rosy as it looks from the outside,’ he said listlessly.

‘No. Probably not. I mean, I’d never want to be a war correspondent, but it would be nice to see a bit of the world.’

They lapsed into silence, each lost in their own thoughts, until he forced himself to make a move and get home. He could have stayed the night, but his heart wasn’t in it. He felt bruised and battered. He couldn’t compete with the life she wanted, and there was absolutely nothing he could do to change that.