One considerable benefit of daygame is that it offers a relatively even playing field in that a man can approach a beautiful girl going about her business without having to pay a cover charge, buy expensive drinks, or deal with cock blocks and other nonsense.
Another great thing about daygame is that it allows the canny player the opportunity to take girls on mini “dates” there and then without having to go through the rigamarole of texting to set up the meet. Learning to initiate instant dates is a vital daygame skill: once mastered, it will enable you to build up sufficient rapport to move rapidly forward through the seduction process.
An instant date is what is says on the tin: it’s when you meet a girl and take her on a “date” there and then. Simple, right? Yes, but as with many concepts related to meeting women, it can at first be counterintuitive for men. We have been socially conditioned to assume that the “right” dating protocol is an exchange of contact details and then a parting of ways, followed by the arrangement of a date over text or social media some time later. Instant dates fly in the face of this and can seem an intimidating prospect, even an impossibility, before you try one out for yourself.
Most of the time you will be taking girls’ phone numbers and contacting them by text later. This is how probably 80 percent of daytime pulls happen. After all, if you meet a girl on the train in the morning before work you probably won’t have the luxury of being able to go for coffee with her there and then, but if the circumstances and vibe are right, an instant date could really help you to move things to the next level.
Perhaps you open a cute girl in the street. After having talked for a while, hopefully she will have become relaxed and receptive to talking to you and begun to show signs of interest. At this point, you could simply take her phone number and walk on.
Another option is to take her on an instant date, perhaps for a coffee at a nearby cafe. In my experience, the benefit of doing this is that it will help to solidify the encounter in the girl’s mind, making it more real. Make no mistake. Men can and do get laid from fizzy, two-minute encounters on the street, where phone numbers are exchanged and contact is initiated later.
The danger here, though, is that once the “high” of being approached has subsided for the girl, she will realize that she actually knows very little about you, which can trigger scepticism (“He’s probably a player who does this all the time”) or even fear (“He’s a complete stranger”), making it unlikely that she will respond when you contact her.
An instant date can alleviate these fears. Talking to her for longer also allows you to show more of your personality and make a stronger impression. Also, given how uncommon instant dates are, it will also communicate confidence and social savvy.
Instant dates are not without their pitfalls. If you are not a good conversationalist, there’s a danger that the instant date could fall flat as you run out of stream, making things awkward. There is also something to be said for the archetype of the “sexy stranger” who sweeps in, takes her phone number, and then disappears. If you fail to maintain some mystery and attraction over your latte, you may find yourself being dumped in the “friend” box. Rapport is always a tricky part of seduction: you need enough to ensure she knows you’re not a threat and that you “get on,” at least superficially, but too much before attraction is sparked merely generates tepid feelings of friendship.
Getting a girl to go on an instant date with you is actually not that difficult, provided your approach and initial chat has gone well and she doesn’t have to be somewhere in the next half hour or so.
Imagine you are doing daygame and now you have a girl standing in front of you who likes you. At this point, you’re ready to pull an instant date. Here’s how you do it.
First of all, you should always remember to put in a false time constraint up front. After all, you don’t want her to think that you intend to monopolize her whole day at this stage. I usually say something like this:
“Listen, I’ve only got twenty minutes before my next meeting …”
[Casual and brief]
“ … but I was going to grab a coffee at Barista Heaven down the street. You should come.”
The idea is to make the proposition seem very relaxed, but at the same time you should ensure you sound gently commanding. It’s better to say “you should come” or “come with me” rather than asking her with a weak “would you like to come with me?”
If you can make the instant date sound off the cuff and fun but ensure that you are leading the interaction rather than begging for a favour, you’ll see more successes.
Once she’s agreed, where do you take her? For me, coffee shops tend to be the default. While I would never take a girl on a “proper” date to a coffee shop, as it is always beneficial to go somewhere that serves alcohol to help lubricate things, in the daytime an alcoholic drink may not be so readily accepted. I also wouldn’t go for food, as you then get into the issue of who pays, plus some guys are messy eaters, which won’t help your cause either.
Once you’re in the venue, continue to chat informally without grilling her or asking too many “interview”-style questions. Talk about yourself, your interests and projects, but take care not to do so in a boastful way. You should aim to make her feel comfortable, while at the same time you should retain some mystery or edge. If you like, drop in very mild teases now and again.
At the end of twenty minutes (or whatever time limit you set), look at your watch, and tell her that you have to go. Don’t let her be the first one to leave. Ideally, you want to go slightly early so that she’s left wanting more. Don’t tell her you’ll message her later or make elaborate plans for the next date. Instead, leave her wondering when you’ll next be in touch, so when you do message she’ll be pleasantly surprised
Occasionally, an instant date can turn into a same-day lay. This very much depends on the type of girl, the circumstances, and how attracted she is to you. There’s no single rule to tell if things are heading in that direction, as there are so many variables, but if you sense a girl you’ve met that day through a cold approach may be down to take things further, don’t make the mistake of bailing too early and losing an opportunity that may not repeat itself.
In a situation that looks promising, it’s worth changing venues a few times or going for a walk. Don’t stay in the same place all day. If it’s coming up to evening time, at this point you can suggest an alcoholic drink. What you’re really aiming for is to bounce her back to your place, and logistics are here around where you live and so on.
The best way of getting her to come back to your place is to say, for example, “There’s this great movie on my computer you’ll really love. Come over for a bit and we’ll watch it.” Again, the trick is to lead rather than to ask. Doing so will give you an air of confidence that she will find attractive, even if for whatever reason she can’t come back with you on that occasion.