ANDREW COULDN’T STOP watching Lana all night. She was so graceful and poised, it made him proud in a weird way, because really she wasn’t anything to him. Perhaps a friend, but that was all.
Liar.
There was more—he wanted her. He wanted her like he hadn’t wanted a woman in a long time. He’d always been attracted to her, but she’d never, ever showed interest in him. Then they’d had a moment in the limo when she’d trembled under his touch.
It sent a rush of heat through him.
Fired his blood.
Just watching her move through the different circles of people made him want her all the more.
I don’t deserve her. Yet she would be his, under false pretenses.
Andrew took a sip of wine, his gaze focused on her as he watched her from the edge of the room. When Lana had opened the door and he’d seen her in that dress, it made the bikini look like a drab piece of cloth. There was more fabric to her dress, but it aroused him more than a two-piece bikini, because this dress accentuated all the right spots.
All of her curves. The color suited her. It brought out the richness in her dark eyes, but it was drab in comparison to her. Dr. Iolana Haole was the most gorgeous creature he’d ever laid eyes on and tomorrow she’d be his.
She’s not yours. This marriage is fake, remember? And you don’t deserve her.
Andrew shook that thought away, because it angered him.
“That is a beautiful ring you bought my daughter,” Dr. Keaka Haole said as he came up beside him.
“Thank you, sir.” Andrew turned to face the man he admired more than his own father. “Your daughter deserves the very best.” And that wasn’t a lie.
“I agree,” Keaka said, grinning. “You’ll make a fine husband and hopefully father one day.”
Andrew choked on the wine he was taking a drink from, while Keaka chuckled softly.
“I’m sorry I caught you by surprise, Andrew, but I do hope to see grandchildren one day. To see my legacy continue.”
“I can tell you, sir, that there is no plan in the immediate future for children.” Andrew never wanted to be a father. That was not on his radar and never would be. His father was a terrible man and Andrew was never, ever going to bring a child into the world when he didn’t know what a good father should be.
He wasn’t going to screw up his kids’ life the way his father had messed up his and his sister’s life.
Didn’t you screw up your sister’s life?
“There may be no plan,” Keaka said, interrupting his thoughts. “But surprises do happen. I didn’t plan on either Iolana or Keaka Jr., but life has a way of throwing curveballs if you’re not paying attention.”
“So true.” At least Andrew knew that the decision to have kids was something he could control. Even though he desperately wanted to take Lana into his bed, he wasn’t going to, so that solved the kid issue. At least from his end.
“I’m looking forward to having you join our family, Andrew.” Then Keaka looked uncomfortable. “I believe that you do care for her deeply. Unlike what happened a few years ago with David.”
“Right,” Andrew said, feeling awkward. He knew about Dr. David Preston and what had happened. He knew that Lana was painted as the pitiful creature and David a bit of a hero. David had used Lana as a way to further his career and wounded her pride—and broken her heart?
Aren’t you doing the same?
The thought made guilt gnaw at him. Lana had believed that David loved her. There was no pretense of love between her and him, but still it wasn’t real either.
“Thank you, sir.” Andrew hoped Lana’s father didn’t notice the awkward tension.
“You can call me Keaka.” Keaka grinned and took a drink from his wine glass. “You’re an asset to the hospital, Andrew. I do wish you’d reconsider your surgical position. I know you performed surgery in Canada.”
“Dr. Haole, you’ve seen my file; my shoulder was damaged and I had a botched surgery. There is no way I can competently hold a scalpel again.”
Keaka narrowed his eyes, but the smile never left his lips. “You know who could fix that botched shoulder?”
“You. I know. You’re the best,” Andrew said.
“I am good, but Lana could fix it. It’s too bad you two fell in love and are getting married so now she’ll never be able to operate on you.”
“Yes, that’s a shame.” He was lying through his teeth, but it was a good excuse to get people to back off about his shoulder and his surgical privileges. He was a good physician. He didn’t need operating room privileges.
Yes, you do. You miss it.
“Well, I would like you to teach our residents the famous Tremblay flap procedure. At least in the simulation lab,” Keaka said.
“I’ll think about it, sir.” Andrew set down his glass of wine as the music started playing a nice jazzy slow song. “If you’ll excuse me, Keaka, I think I’m going to grab your daughter and take her for a dance.”
Keaka grinned and held up his wine glass as Andrew made his way through the crowd. He was glad to put some distance between him and his boss. Or rather his future father-in-law. Who was asking way too many questions he was not comfortable with.
It was bad enough Keaka Sr. knew about his shoulder. At least no one beyond human resources and Keaka Sr. knew. Patient confidentiality was a blessing. He didn’t want Lana to pity him the way he pitied himself.
Lana turned the moment he came up to the group.
Her dark eyes twinkling, she was still smiling. “Andrew?”
“Would you care to dance?” He held out his hand, his pulse thundering in his ears. He wanted to kiss her and he didn’t know why that compulsion came over him.
“I don’t dance,” she said quickly.
“Tonight you do.” And, without taking no for an answer, he took her hand and pulled her out onto the dance floor, spinning her around and then pulling her close as they danced together. “Whoa, I didn’t realize how tall you are in those heels.”
“Well, I think we’re the same height, so yes, the heels do give me a bit of an advantage. I usually wear flats.”
“We’re not the same height, or else you’d be really towering over me.”
“Would it make you feel better if I took my shoes off?” she teased.
“Perhaps, but I don’t think that’s proper decorum.”
She cocked a finely arched brow. “Oh? And what’s proper decorum, plastic milk crate man?”
Andrew laughed at her dig. “I’m totally bringing those to your house. Correction, our house.”
“You are not!” Then she laughed. “I’m totally wigging out about tomorrow.”
“It’ll be fine.” He ran his hand over her bare back, revelling in the silky-soft feel of her skin. Goose pimples rose under his light touch.
Where else would he bring out this reaction in her?
He was glad he was having such an effect on her.
“Don’t,” she whispered, her voice hitching slightly.
“Why?” He stopped anyways, though he didn’t want to.
“Because...just...”
“I’m sorry, I can’t help it. You’re a beautiful woman.” He wanted to lean in and kiss her, but he was holding back. This wasn’t real. He couldn’t have her. He had to respect the boundaries.
“Excuse me, Dr. Haole?”
Andrew inwardly thanked the hotel event captain for interrupting this moment. Andrew let go of Lana.
“Yes?” she asked.
“There’s a phone call for you from the hospital. They said it was urgent.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll wait right here,” Andrew said.
She nodded, but wouldn’t look him in the eye. He hoped he hadn’t made her angry. He hoped that she wouldn’t change her mind about helping him. He hoped that he hadn’t ruined it all.
* * *
“This is Dr. Haole speaking.” Lana tried to focus on the call that was coming through and tried to ignore the sensation that still was burned into her skin from Andrew’s light touch. It had felt good. She wanted more. She wanted him to kiss her. Her heart was still racing and she had to get control of herself or she might do something impulsive.
She listened to the resident explain that the patient’s collarbone was badly fractured, and the broken bone had punctured a lung. The lung was repaired, but the collarbone needed to be addressed. The collarbone would have to be repaired with screws and plates, because the fracture was so bad.
“Tell Dr. Young I’ll be right there to fix the collarbone.”
“The other lung is damaged and we may have to cut the other side of the clavicle to remove a sharp object embedded into the patient’s shoulder.”
Lana growled into the receiver, “You do not cut that man’s clavicle without me there. Do you understand, Doctor? Cutting the clavicle is not the answer.”
“Yes, Dr. Haole.”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes. Keep him stable.” Lana ended the call.
“Is everything okay?” Andrew asked, coming up behind her.
“No,” she said. “I have to get back to the hospital or Dr. Young is going to break the other side of a patient’s clavicle because Dr. Young may be a fantastic general surgeon, but she’s not an orthopedic one.”
Andrew winced and then nodded. “Okay, let’s get you to the hospital. You tell your dad why we’re leaving and I’ll get us a ride there.”
“Sounds good.” Lana made her way through the crowd. Her father had had a few too many drinks with a few other orthopedic surgeons who were attending the gala; she was probably the only one, besides her resident, in the vicinity who’d had barely anything to drink. Even David, across the room, was teetering and his new conquest looked none too pleased. Although he wasn’t an orthopedic surgeon. He was a neurologist.
Good.
At least she was responsible.
As always.
The last thing she drank was that sip of champagne before Andrew had slipped this ring on her finger over three hours ago. A cup of coffee before she scrubbed in would chase away any remnants, but really there was nothing in her system. She was the only one who could do this surgery.
Her father wished her well and she was headed straight for the entrance they’d come in. Andrew was pacing by the door.
“A cab is waiting.”
“Good, let’s get out of here.”
Andrew helped her into the cab and gave instructions to the driver while Lana pulled off her expensive necklace and earrings and put them in her evening bag. In her bag she carried a hair elastic, so while the cab negotiated the streets from the resort to the hospital she quickly braided her hair and put it up. All she had to do now was slip out of her dress and shoes in her office, throw on some scrubs and scrub in.
Then she remembered the ring on her left hand, glinting in the street lamps that they raced past. She didn’t want to take it off and lose it.
“Pin it to your scrubs,” Andrew said.
“What?” she asked.
“I saw you staring at the ring. The way you were frowning at it, you seemed confused about what to do with it, like you forgot it was there when you took off your other jewelry.”
“I did forget,” she said sheepishly.
“It’s okay, Lana.” He nodded. “Pin it to your scrubs; that’s what I see the nurses do all the time. They pin it over their heart.”
She tried not to roll her eyes. “I’ll do just that.”
He grinned. “That’s my girl.”
“Don’t call me that!”
“Snookums?”
“Didn’t we already have this conversation, Tremblay?”
He chuckled. “I suppose we did.”
The cab pulled up in front of the hospital. Andrew took care of the fare while Lana got out and raced toward her office. Andrew ran after her. As she tried to undo her dress she realized she couldn’t reach the zipper but, before she could curse in annoyance, she felt Andrew’s hand on her back.
“Let me help,” he whispered.
Her body shivered in delight as he undid the hook that was just a bit above her waist and then pulled the zipper down. It was such an intimate thing to do and it heated her blood just with the thought of him touching her.
Of Andrew doing something so intimate. Something only a lover or husband might do.
Well, he’s almost your husband.
“Thank you,” she managed to squeak out.
“No problem.” He undid his bow tie, slipping it off, and then took off his jacket. Her pulse began to race and a bunch of naughty thoughts crept across her mind.
It had been so long since she’d had any sort of physical contact with a man. She’d never really missed it before. Didn’t care for it much when she had been intimate with a man, but being close to Andrew, getting to know him and being so attracted to him was giving her pause.
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad with him? Just once.
Don’t think like that. You can’t think like that. He’s off-limits.
She had been expecting him to leave, but he was still standing there. “Are you going to get into a set of scrubs too?”
“Yeah...I think I would like to watch, if you don’t mind, and not from the galley.” He was pale when he managed to get the words out. “Do you have an extra set of scrubs in here?”
“Only women’s, but I’m sure there’s some larger ones in the residents’ lounge.”
He nodded. “I’ll see you down on the OR floor.”
Once he left, Lana was able to take a deep breath and calm her erratic pulse. She had to get everything under control because she had to focus on the surgery at hand. A clavicle that was broken and protruding, lung damage and the other clavicle that might need to be broken surgically to remove something that was imbedded into the patient’s other shoulder? This was going to be a long, tricky surgery.
Lana hoped that the other side of the clavicle didn’t need to be broken. That the object could be removed and then she could just repair the side of the clavicle that was broken. Right now she had to get her game face on.
This was what she lived for.
This was what she’d dedicated her whole life to. It was her passion. But a hospital setting had never been her passion. Lana had wanted to travel the world, work in third world countries doing orthopedic repairs.
Actually, she’d wanted to live out of the back of a rucksack, much like Andrew had been doing. Only that wasn’t what her father had wanted for her. If he was going to spend money to send her to prestigious schools like Princeton, then she was going to become a world class surgeon. He was going to groom her to take over the hospital one day.
It just wasn’t what she wanted, but it was what she was fated for.
Lana had given up hoping for anything different. This was her life now and, as much as she felt trapped by the way her father had planned out her life, at least she could still practice surgery. At least she was still helping people.
She took a calming breath. First she pinned her engagement ring to her scrubs like Andrew had suggested. It was heavy over her heart and she was very aware of it.
Focus.
As she stepped into the scrub room she watched the trauma surgeons work on the patient. The man had been impaled by a metal pole. And she winced when she saw it.
“It’s nasty,” Andrew said, coming up beside her, scrubbing in. He had to be sterile too, even if he was only observing.
“It doesn’t look pleasant.” She shook off her hands then grabbed a paper towel to dry them.
“I’m glad you took my advice about the ring.”
“Now everyone will see it,” she muttered.
“The surgical gown will cover it.” Then he leaned over, grinning in that charming sexy way that always made her weak in the knees. “Besides, everyone knows we’re engaged. Unless, of course, you’re afraid that a token, such as a ring, makes you appear weak.”
Lana rolled her eyes. “You ready to come in there?” she asked.
He frowned. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“This is the first time I’ve seen you in the operating room since you came here. You’ve always avoided it since I’ve known you. Though I’ve noticed you in the gallery, I was surprised when you suggested you’d come in and observe.”
The frown intensified. His eyes narrowed and she knew she’d pushed him again. She’d pushed those invisible buttons that he was so sensitive about.
“Do you not want me in there?” He spun it around, trying to change the focus.
“I want you in there. I would love if you assisted me.”
“No surgical privileges, except observation, remember?”
“I haven’t forgotten.” She headed into the operating room, shuddering at the change in temperature. The OR was chilly and she’d been in a packed gala for most of the night. Not to mention that it had been muggy outside as well. Even though she knew the operating room was kept at a lower temperature, her body still was shocked and she couldn’t help but shiver as a scrub nurse helped her on with her surgical gown and gloves.
“Sorry to tear you away from your gala, Dr. Haole, but I figured that you might be the only orthopedic surgeon in a five mile radius who would be sober enough to help me.” Dr. Young was giving her a dig.
Lana bit her tongue. Figuratively. “I am the orthopedic surgeon on call, so your assumption would be correct, Dr. Young.”
Dr. Young snorted in response but continued working on the punctured lung. “I’ll soon be done here and then you can go about repairing the clavicle.”
“What about the object in his other shoulder? Will you remove that?”
“I would like to, but I think that I will have to break the other clavicle to remove it and you gave strict instructions for us not to touch it.” The tone was sanctimonious. Dr. Young was older than her and had been a trauma surgeon overseas while she’d been serving the country. She’d probably done this on her own, but when it came to orthopedic procedures at this hospital Lana oversaw them all.
No one was touching the unbroken part of the clavicle until she’d gotten a good look at it.
“Do we have any recent imaging?” Lana asked.
“Here, Dr. Haole,” a resident said, lighting up the screen to show X-rays.
Andrew walked into the operating room.
“It looks like the object has lodged next to the acromioclavicular joint and the clavicle.”
Lana nodded. “It’s lucky it wasn’t dislocated, but it’s jammed in there.”
“The main concern Dr. Young had was whether dislodging it would damage the lung,” the resident, Dr. Page, said.
“If I manage the dislocation I don’t need to break the clavicle. If I dislocate it from the joint in a controlled manner we can remove the object without damaging the lung and repair the joint with this side of the clavicle intact.”
“I agree,” Andrew said. “I’ve done this before.”
“Are you certain?” Dr. Young called from the table, where she was finishing up her part of the job. “I don’t want to have to come back and clean up your mess when you damage the lung.”
“Then you don’t have to. I’ve repaired a lung before or Dr. Page can help me. I’m sure he’s capable of it as well.”
Dr. Young shook her head. Lana knew she was overstepping some boundaries, but she didn’t know why Dr. Young had her knickers in a knot over her. Of course, when didn’t Dr. Young have her knickers in a knot?
“Since you’re so confident in Dr. Page’s ability, I am finished here.” Dr. Young handed over her surgical tools and walked away.
Lana gritted her teeth but didn’t say anything. Dr. Young was so passive-aggressive and didn’t trust anyone unless they’d been doing surgery for at least fifteen years. And it wasn’t as if her father had instilled a lot of confidence. He’d overseen most of her surgeries like this in the past and Dr. Young was digging at her for being the daughter of the chief.
“What a diva,” Andrew whispered under his breath.
Lana snorted as she took the lead surgeon’s spot. “Dr. Page, would you assist me?”
“Yes, Dr. Haole!”
“Get a surgical gown on and gloves.”
Dr. Page nodded and headed over to a scrub nurse to get gowned up. He was eager and Lana couldn’t begrudge the resident that, though Lana would rather have Andrew, who had done this before. She’d rather he’d assist her, but Andrew made no move to assist. He stood where the X-rays were, watching her as she went to work.
It was a delicate procedure, but it would be the only way to dislodge the object from the patient’s shoulder without damaging the joint, breaking the clavicle again or damaging the lungs. Lana took a deep breath and glanced over at Andrew again. She had a moment of uncertainty. She hadn’t done this procedure a lot of times. Especially without her father here. Whenever she came into the operating room with something like this, her father insisted on assisting.
If she screwed this up...
Don’t think about it.
Andrew nodded. “You got this.”
Just like that, his belief in her entered her and it shocked her how much he calmed her in that moment. No one had ever been able to calm her down so fast. It was scary, but she also liked it. And she was surprised by how much she liked it.
Lana took a deep breath and waited for Dr. Page to join her at the table. The X-rays were wheeled over so that she could get a closer look at the object. Then the fluoroscope was turned on, so she could see the joints in the shoulder. After the object which had impaled the patient was removed, then she would repair the dislocation and then fix the broken side of the clavicle. The patient would be in the long haul for physiotherapy and would be in a lot of pain.
Tonight would be a long night. She just hoped that she got a bit of sleep so she didn’t have dark circles under her eyes for tomorrow night’s wedding.
“Are you ready, Dr. Haole?” Dr. Page asked.
“Yes. Let’s get this patient on the road to recovery.” She took a deep breath and held out her hand to the scrub nurse. “Scalpel.”