Dad cooks lamb chops and vegetables for dinner. I fill Yindy’s bowl with cat food and join everyone at the dining table. Zeke and Luke handle the chops with their hands and bite from them like pieces of KFC chicken. They’ve learned well from me and Dad. I remember going for a sleepover at a white friend’s place and his parents barbecued chops for dinner. They ate them with a knife and fork, and I felt so embarrassed because I’d only ever eaten chops with my hands before. I told Mum about it, and she said: ‘White people don’t like to get their chins dirty.’
I’m still buzzing from this afternoon with Harley. It’s like I’m high. It’s a feeling I haven’t had for a long time – a warm tingling in my stomach, a fairy-floss cloud all over my body.
After dinner, I have a shower and get into bed. I can hear Dad watching TV in the living room. I pull out my phone, feeling confident. I’m going to message Harley and he’s going to reply. I had to be sure there was something between us, and now I am. I can’t be imagining it. He hugged me on the steps of the town hall. He agreed that it was some first date. There’s something happening here.
I check the time. It’s just after ten o’clock.
Me: Hey. How was telling your mum about the play?
Harley: She’s excited. She went and got a bottle of champagne lol then we watched Grease on Netflix.
Me: Haha maybe I should watch it.
Harley: YES. You have to. It’s a rite of passage for every child.
Me: I’m not a child haha
Harley: You are until you watch Grease. It’s the big step you take before you become a man.
Me: The way I become a man is sitting through John Travolta singing for an hour and a half? Haha
Harley: Bruh. It’s a classic lol.
Me: Fine I’ll put it on my list of things to watch. It’s on there with Saving Private Ryan.
Harley: Wait a fucking minute. You haven’t seen Saving Private Ryan?
Me: Nah. Dad used to have it on DVD but I watched the first scene and it made me feel queasy, so I stopped haha.
Harley: Wow, it’s only the greatest war movie ever made. Tom Hanks’s second best performance.
Me: What’s his first?
Harley: Cast Away, without a doubt. It’s my favourite movie. 100%
Me: I haven’t seen Cast Away. What’s that one about?
Harley: Oh
Harley: My
Harley: Fucking
Harley: God.
Harley: Okay. Jonah. We have to fix this. We have to fix YOU.
Me: Hahahahah okay, but I’ve been trying to fix myself for a long time and I’m not sure it’s possible haha.
Harley: We are having a movie night and we’re gonna watch Cast Away and Grease. We have to fix this. Like, this is unacceptable.
Tegan tries to call me while I’m typing a reply. What could she want at this time of night? I let it ring out and go back to my reply.
Me: Okay, this obviously requires immediate action and treatment. How about we do it this Friday night?
Harley: Sounds good. And yes, we need to attack this asap!
My heart is pounding, making that cartoonish love heart shape as it pounds out of my chest. I’m going to have a movie night with Harley. I can’t believe it.
Harley: I’ll stay over yours?
Me: Yeah okay, I’ll check with Dad in the morning.
Tegan is ringing me again. I’m annoyed because I’m still texting with Harley, but it’s late. Something must be wrong. I put the phone to my ear.
‘Hey.’
‘Jonah, I don’t know what to do,’ Tegan says. Her voice is croaky and she’s sniffling.
‘What’s wrong?’
‘Patience High Goss,’ she says. ‘Look at the page.’
I put Tegan on speakerphone and navigate to Facebook. I search for the Patience High Goss page and click on the profile. My stomach sinks as I read the latest post, from forty minutes ago:
Tegan Huckney has been fucking Jack Bishop for two years. Jack’s been trying to shake her off but what can we say? She loves cock.
‘What the actual fuck?’
‘I tried reporting it, but nothing happened,’ Tegan says.
‘Maybe it’s not so bad. No one uses Facebook anymore. No one’s liked it or commented.’
‘That doesn’t matter. It’s out there. It’s there forever.’
‘It’s okay, Tegan. Really. No one believes the shit that gets posted on there anyway.’
‘Yes, they do. The truth is whatever they want to believe.’
‘I’m sorry. I don’t really know what to say. I’ll report it too.’
‘It’s no use. I tried to ring Jack and he’s not answering. I’ve sent him a hundred texts and he won’t reply.’
‘Well, so what? I thought you didn’t really care about him.’
‘I … I …’ Tegan begins to cry through the phone. It’s quiet and sniffly and my stomach is twisting for her. ‘It’s not just meaningless hook-ups,’ Tegan says. ‘I know it sounds stupid, but we have something between us.’
‘You and Jack? Really?’
‘Don’t judge me. All men do is judge women. Guys fuck around too. But they become stallions, heroes. You reckon anyone is gonna be calling Jack a slut? No. It’ll just be me, because I’m the girl. Jack’s the stud.’
Tegan cries harder again. She tries to sniff away her tears but they sound like they’re endlessly forcing their way out of her.
‘I really don’t know what to say. Maybe go to sleep, Tegan. There’s nothing you can do about it tonight.’
‘I’m sorry,’ she says. ‘Goodnight.’
She hangs up. There’s an anger, a heat, burning over my forehead like a fire. I hate whoever is posting this shit.