| |
Hours later, we lay tangled in Dean’s bed, my head on his chest, the steady thub-thub of his heart against my ear. One of his arms was curled around my shoulder, the other draped across my waist, his fingers drawing soft circles on my skin.
I’d never felt so wanted or so safe.
Sex with Dean was like nothing else, but it was more than that. If our chemistry together was the foundation, then every touch, every heated gaze, and the time we spent together built into something. A structure on a solid base. We were more than a one-night stand; I knew that in my soul. But did he?
I snuggled closer. “What time do you have to get up?” I asked.
“Whenever I need to take you home. I’m on days tomorrow and Wednesday, then nights Thursday and Friday. I’ll drop you off in the morning, and then go for a run.”
“Fitness bunny, much?”
“Pfft. I have to stay in shape. There’s a gym at the station, but I like the freedom of running on the beach.”
I lifted my head and met his gaze. “There is something you like about living here. It’s not all bad.”
His eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled. “Yeah. It’s not all bad.” He squeezed my ass, and the memory of his spanking teased at me. “Do you wanna stay tomorrow night as well? And then I probably won’t see you until Homegrown on Saturday,” he said.
“Okay.”
“I keep meaning to ask. What date does your exhibition open? I need to check it against my roster.”
“It’s almost two weeks away, on Saturday, the third of Feb. I’ve got the day off for last-minute panics. Tuesday is Waitangi Day, and I can’t decide if opening so close to the public holiday is a good idea or not. What if everyone that might attend is away for a long weekend?”
“And what if holiday makers and weekend visitors to the coast all come and see it?”
“True. See what I mean? I’m panicking already, and I’ve still got two weeks to go.”
“That Saturday is my day off.”
“Do you think you might be able to come for a viewing?”
“Try keeping me away.” He gathered me closer and pressed a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose. “My ex always complained that I was unreliable, but she was wrong. She’d make plans for us to go somewhere and wouldn’t bother checking with me. Then, when I couldn’t go, she’d throw her toys out of the cot. It got old.”
“Is that the one you travelled with?”
“Yeah. That was Belle.”
I contemplated his words. That didn’t sound so bad. “Is that why you broke up?”
He shifted in bed and moved down, putting his face at eye level with my tits. “Do we have to talk about her? I’d much rather busy myself with these.” He closed his mouth around one nipple and laved it with his tongue.
Desire lifted her head inside me, but I frowned. “Don’t try to distract me, Dean Logan.”
He sighed. His breath was warm against my chest. “We broke up because I got transferred down here, and neither of us wanted a long-distance relationship. ’Kay?”
That was crazy. If Dean were my boyfriend, I wouldn’t let him go because he’d be working away for a few months. “That sucks. I’m sorry.”
“Talking of sucking...” He pressed his lips to the tender underside of my breast in a chain of beautiful kisses.
It almost distracted me, but there was another question I had to ask. “When you transfer back to Auckland, are you planning to pick up with her again?”
He froze, and then slowly lifted his head. “What kind of question is that?”
“You didn’t say no.”
We stared at each other for the longest moment. I couldn’t believe I asked him that. My heart thudded painfully. He was going to say yes, wasn’t he? Sick dread pooled in my gut. Please say something.
“I don’t know. We left it open.”
Shit. Tears pressed at the backs of my eyes, but I wasn’t going to cry. I bit down on my lip, the sudden pain helping me to focus. “This is why you only wanted one night with me, right?”
His face shuttered. “I didn’t make any promises. I didn’t ask you to, either.”
“You’re someone else’s boyfriend.” And I’m lying in your bed.
“I’m not.” In a swift move, he sat up and glared down at me. “We split up. Not sure how else I can say it.”
“Were you living together?”
His forehead creased in an ominous-looking frown. “Not really.”
Where did I hear that before? Oh yeah. When I asked if he had a girlfriend. I tugged the covers up to my chin, needing armour. “So does that mean she moved in with you, or you moved in with her? And I know that technically you’re not together now, but you were a couple of weeks ago.” I hated the harsh note in my voice. Hated the way I’d become so vulnerable. Only minutes ago, I thought we might have a future together.
“Belle is living in my apartment.” The words grated on my last nerves. So much for feeling safe with Dean. I was a ready fuck until he went back to his girlfriend. He was using me.
And I was done with being used.