Chapter 14

 

Nor numbly took a sip of the scalding coffee. She sat on a chair in the small office, wearing a sweatshirt and jeans, her hair tied back in a ponytail. She chewed on her lip, none of the mischief that lived in her apparent. Her sister, Anita, paced the edges of the room, occasionally firing a malignant glance in Andy’s direction. He fidgeted, his arms crossed tightly, holding himself together.

“Anita, can you give us five minutes?” Nor said. She placed her coffee on the table and gestured to her sister with a dismissive nod.

“He’s not coming back with us,” Anita said abruptly.

“Anita!”

“He’s not–Dad’s back. He’ll go apeshit! You must be crazy.”

Nor stood, a physical barrier between Andy and Anita. Her sister, a little taller and broader than Nor, blinked in surprise.

“Two words. Oasis tickets. You fucking owe me after the way Dad laid into me after you told him about the concert.”

Anita looked at Andy then back to Nor. Her face softened slightly.

“Five minutes. And then I’m taking you home.” She started to leave then stopped. “Oh and you better start thinking about what you’re going to tell Mum and Dad about why you left the house in the middle of the night.”

“Just go.”

Anita shook her head at Andy then left, slamming the door behind her. He watched her go and saw her as volcanic ground, uneven and barren with dark crevices and splits, red magma shining through from below. He wished he could have met her under better circumstances.

Nor shrugged apologetically, but then her face collapsed into something like miserable confusion. “Why didn’t you say anything?” she asked, close to tears.

Andy tried to answer but his throat closed. He swallowed, ashamed.

Nor sat, rested her head against a shaking hand and stared ahead, through Andy.

“Why didn’t you just...” She focused on him. “Why didn’t you do anything?”

Andy stared at his feet wishing he never had to look up.

“Andy, please, I’m trying to understand. You heard what the doctor said. She’ll only let you leave if you have somewhere to stay tonight–if you have someone there for you.”

Andy met her gaze and fought to keep his eyes on hers. There was only concern in Nor’s expression. He tried to answer, but he couldn’t explain it. Was he weak, a coward? Or was it worse, was he genuinely crazy?

Nor dragged her chair closer and held his hand. Her grip was surprisingly solid. She brushed her other hand across his cheek.

“There is nobody else, is there?”

Andy shook his head and looked away. The tears came then and he convulsed with their force. Nor pulled him close and he buried his head against her shoulder as he wept.

“I’m so sorry Andy,” she whispered. “So sorry. Everything is going to be okay.”

Eventually he straightened himself. Nor still held onto his hand and with the other he wiped the tears from his eyes. “I miss him. I miss him so much.”

Nor nodded and smiled sadly.

“I didn’t know what to do,” Andy said quietly. Nor squeezed his hand. It was an injection of courage and he smiled at her, able to continue. “I should have– I should have told someone.  I didn’t know what to do. Sometimes it didn’t feel...like it was actually happening, but I think that was my condition.” He paused, realizing he had no idea how to move forward. “I’m so scared. What am I going to do?”

Nor didn’t answer. She gripped his hand even harder, and seemed close to tears again. She let out a faltering breath. “My cousin died two years ago. He was five, got hit by a car.” She hesitated and Andy felt the tremble in her hand. He waited for her to continue.

“It was terrible...” She stopped and drew in a breath. “My aunty didn’t leave the house for almost a year and, you know what? She has my uncle Vinnie, Rae my older cousin, my grandparents, Mum and Dad, me, Anita. You– I don’t know how you’ve made it this far. I don’t know how you’ve coped at all.”

Andy fought off the emotion that threatened to overwhelm him. He just about held himself upright. Humbled, he searched for something to say. When he spoke, it wasn’t what he expected. “I’ve felt so alone.”

Nor smiled and touched his face again. “Not anymore.”

They stayed like that, just staring at each other, until Nor leaned in, moved her face toward his, her eyes softening. Andy braced, his heart fluttered. He had never kissed anyone. Butterflies danced inside him. He felt electrified, nauseous; empowered yet exposed.

Andy tilted his head. Closed his eyes.

The door burst open and he and Nor sprang back as if a wall of fire had erupted between them. They stared at each other sheepishly.

“Feeling better then?” Anita asked. She stepped to one side and allowed Dr. Weller into the room.

Andy stared at her blankly at first until he remembered where he was and why he was there. Everything came back in one unwanted bundle.

“Miss Patel has agreed for you to stay with her family for the next couple of nights.” Dr. Weller tilted her clipboard to read something off the page.

Nor looked to her sister and flashed her a curious yet grateful look. Anita ignored her and kept a smile aimed in Dr. Weller’s direction.

Dr. Weller placed the notepad down on the desk with a thump. She stared at Andy over the top of her spectacles. “You’ve been though a considerable trauma, Andy, and I want you to make an appointment with Dr. Grant over the course of the next few days...as an outpatient, though. He’ll make a call on whether we need to increase your dose of medication. But, for a start, you need to follow the current prescription. Religiously.” She studied him then continued. “It doesn’t end here though, Andy. Arranging your Grandpa’s funeral, sorting out his estate–just going back home. These things will put you under a considerable amount of stress. There are people here you can talk to, if you need the help, that is.”

Andy nodded.

“He can talk to me too,” Nor said fiercely.

Dr. Weller smiled. “Absolutely.” She grabbed an envelope from a set of in-trays on a gray filing cabinet beneath the notice board. “This is a pack the hospital prepares for people coping with the recently deceased. It contains help and guidance, as well as useful telephone numbers for things like arranging the funeral, processing death certificates etcetera. The mortuary will be in touch once they’re able to release your Grandpa to whichever funeral home you decide on.”

“Thanks,” Andy said, standing tentatively. Dr. Weller smiled as she ushered them to the door. Andy saw a rainbow above her then, a brilliant sky over the tundra he had originally envisaged her as.

Anita and Nor were both smiling until they cleared the corridor and Dr. Weller was out of view. Anita instantly scowled. “He can’t bloody stay with us, you know.”

Nor shook her head angrily. “Then why say he could! I thought you’d talked to Dad!”

“Ha!” spat her sister. “As if! Dad will go mental if he knows why you’re out at this hour. Maybe I’ll tell him your new boyfriend is a cra–”

“Say it.” Nor stepped toward her sister, her fists balled. “Just say it and see what happens.”

“Wait,” Andy blurted. The sisters stopped, looked at him as if they were only just aware he had a voice in this. “Thanks for being here for me. Both of you. But I’ll be okay to go home. Really I will. Don’t argue. Please.”

Neither girl spoke. Anita looked at Nor then exhaled. “Seriously, you can’t come home, but Rob has a spare room. His flatmate is in Spain. He won’t mind if you stay for the next couple of nights, just until you get your head back together, that is. I phoned him while you were...talking.”

Nor grinned and rubbed her sister’s arm. “Thanks,” she said quietly.

Anita shook her head, mock scolding. “You’re a bloody nuisance. We’d be here all night if it wasn’t for me.” She paused and managed an embarrassed smile. “I’m sorry about the tickets. I didn’t think he’d react as badly.”

Nor nodded to her sister then flashed Andy a wink. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”