Kate sat on the cold, cement steps outside of Micola’s backdoor, her knees clenched together as she shivered in the April evening air. Her jeans and light jacket were no match for the chilly spring wind bearing down on her.
It had been a few days since the news of Sal’s murder, and she was growing accustomed to the idea that she now was a killer. What she hadn’t considered was the growing paranoia and how much it would fray her nerves.
She stared out into the blackness of the backyard, ignoring the revving engine of a car down the street, and the beginnings of a heated argument coming from a few doors down.
When the lights from Eddie’s car bounced up the driveway on her left, she scrambled to her feet. She smoothed her jacket and jeans and secured her bag over her shoulder, patting the bottom of it to confirm the gun was in its place. She waited at the bottom of the stairs for Eddie to park Micola’s car and exit the garage. As he pushed the buttons that commanded the garage door to close, she called out to him.
“Hello, Eddie.”
Eddie turned. “Who’s there?”
“It’s me. Kate.”
He walked toward her, straining to see her in the darkness. “Kate? That you?”
“Yes.”
Eddie waved his hand toward the driveway. “I didn’t see your car.”
“I walked,” she lied. Her car was parked around the corner and down an alley.
“What’re ya’ doin’ here, Kate?”
She swallowed. “I—I ... this is embarrassing.”
“What? What is it?” he asked, patting his hair as he walked in her direction. “You need somethin’?”
“I guess I was just looking for someone to talk to.” She watched his expression soften.
“Yeah. Sure. Come on in. I’m glad you came.”
He fumbled with his keys as he tried to open the back door. Once opened, he flipped on the kitchen light and stepped back, watching Kate as she crossed the threshold.
“I could use somebody to talk to, too,” Eddie said. “I suppose you heard about Sal on the news.”
Kate stopped, her mouth open.
Sal.
“Kate? You okay?”
“I, ah’. Yeah, yes, I heard. I’m so sorry, Eddie. This must be ... I’m just ...”
She looked at her hands and then bit her lip, as she looked up at him. She watched his eyes quickly scan her body. He looked thinner, his skin pale.
“Please. Where’s my manners? Come into the livin’ room, Kate. Sit down. Let’s talk, okay?”
She smiled. “Okay.”
Eddie nodded and walked quickly down the dark hall, flipping on lights as he passed. Kate followed him into the antique-looking living room, admiring the mahogany grandfather clock ticking in the corner.
“Go ahead. Sit down. I’ll get us—” He paused and turned to her, arms out. “What can I get fa-you, ‘eh? Coffee? Water?”
“I’d love a glass of wine—I mean—if you have any.”
She watched his eyes pop a little. “Ah’, wine? Sure. Yeah. I think I got some. White? Red?” He snapped and pointed his finger at her. “White. You like White.”
She smiled and nodded, looking directly into his eyes. “That’s right. Thanks.”
“Great. I’ll go—”
“Do you have any music?”
“Ah’. Yeah. Micola had quite the selection. Anything in particular?”
Kate looked at her hands and back up at him. “Something quiet. So we can talk, I mean.”
He nodded. “Right.” He walked over to Micola’s console stereo and started flipping through her old albums.
“Wow,” Kate said, walking toward him. “This stereo is amazing.” She stroked the dark glossed wood. “So vintage.”
He moved his hand through his hair and nodded. “Right? I just about fell over the first time I saw this thing. It’s in pretty good shape, too. Sounds fantastic.”
Eddie flipped the lever and they watched the vinyl album fall to the turntable, and the needle move to the exact spot where the first song began. The sound of Tony Bennett’s smooth voice filled the room. Eddie adjusted the volume so they could talk.
“Tony Bennett,” Kate said. “Perfect.”
Eddie smiled. “Yeah. Perfect.”
He removed his suit jacket and tie, laying them across one of the two chairs facing the sofa. “I’ll go get that wine. Have a seat. Make yourself comfortable.”
He called to her from the kitchen. “Can I get you somethin’ to eat? A sandwich or maybe a snack or somethin’?”
Kate called out over the music. “No, thanks. Just the wine.”
He came back in, strutting, she noticed.
Cocky bastard.
He leaned down and handed her the wine.
She looked up and gave him the look Marco always told her made him melt. “Thanks.” She took a pretend-sip and watched Eddie gulp his.
They sat in uncomfortable silence, listening to the crooner sing about San Francisco. She sensed Eddie’s nervousness and savored it. He took another long drink of his wine and she pretended to take another sip.
“So,” he said. “What’d’ya wanna’ talk about? What can I do fa-ya’?”
She gave him the look again and shrugged. “It’s pretty embarrassing, actually. It’s just ... I’ve been so ... lonely. I miss Marco and Renzo so much, I don’t know what to do with myself. I can’t talk to my mom. She’s grown so impatient with me. She wants me back at work. She acts like it was just a little blip in the road. But I can’t ...”
She shook her head, real tears burning her eyes, as she looked down at her hands.
“And my dad—I can’t talk to him about it either.”
Her shoulders fell and she started crying. She hadn’t envisioned herself looking and feeling this genuine.
Eddie stood. “I ah’ ...” He rubbed the side of his cheek with his knuckles. “Shit. I ...”
Kate looked up, wiping her eyes. He walked over and handed her his drink napkin. She took it and he moved to sit next to her.
She let him.
“What can I do, Kate? I’m sorry you’re so sad. Shit. I hate seein’ ya’ like this, ya’ know?”
He reached out his hand and gently brushed a strand of hair from her eye.
She let him.
He sat uncomfortably close, but she didn’t move. The Tony Bennett album moved to the next song. Finally, she mustered up the nerve to sit back against the sofa. Eddie sat back too, and Kate tipped her head and rested it on his shoulder. She heard his breathing over the music. He was trying to slow it down, but Kate sensed his struggle. She worried he could hear her heart pounding in her chest because, to her, it seemed to be drowning out the music. They sat motionless in the dimly-lit room for several moments.
In her head, Kate contemplated her next move. She didn’t like being exposed through the huge picture window behind their heads. She shimmied a little, and he looked at her.
“Kate, I’m sorry—if you don’t—”
She shook her head. “No. This is nice, really. It’s just—” She turned. “I feel like the whole world is watching us through that window.”
Eddie pulled away. “Oh, yeah. I can fix that, I think. Lemme’ see.”
He stood, walked around the sofa, and peeked behind the drapes, looking for a way to close them.
“Shit. I don’t see how you close these.” He turned to look at her, letting out a loud breath. “Sorry, I ...”
Kate stood. “I think ... maybe I should go.”
She reached for her bag, feeling through the fabric for the gun. She really felt she should go. This was a mistake and he’d soon see right through her.
“No, no.” Eddie was next to her in an instant. “Don’t go. Really, Kate. I want you to stay.” He held her arms, sliding his hands down them, as he looked into her eyes. “Please, Kate. Stay.” He chuckled. “Maybe you could help me figure out these drapes, ‘eh?”
She looked into his eyes. She’d never been this close to him. His eyes were so dark, black almost. Long lashes. He wasn’t unattractive to the ordinary woman, but he made Kate’s skin crawl. She hated everything he stood for, all the damage he’d done since he’d arrived a year ago. She swallowed and held her nerves.
“Sure. Let me see ...” She walked around the sofa and pulled the drapes away from the wall. “Oh, here.” She found an attached string on a pulley and moved it. Slowly, the drapes pulled together until they were closed.
“Good,” Eddie said.
He put out his hand inviting Kate to return to the sofa. She paused, before nodding and sitting back in the same place. Eddie joined her, a little closer this time.
“Now,” he said. “Where were we?”
“It’s just ...” Kate lowered her gaze. “I needed someone to talk to. I have no one. I hope it’s okay I came. I ...”
“Kate. I’m glad you came. Stop worryin’ about it. Let’s just sit here, drink our wine, and listen to the music. Sit back, now. Like you was doin’ before. Put your head back here.” He patted his shoulder. “It felt nice. I’ve been lonely, too. First Micola, now Sal. It’s like a damned nightmare, ya’ know?”
Kate nodded, holding the stem of her wine glass, as she twisted her head to look into his eyes. “I do know. It’s so terribly lonely. I feel like I’ve stopped living.”
He nodded.
She moved to sit forward, rubbing her hands on her thighs.
“Maybe... I don’t know...”
“Maybe what?”
Losing her nerve, Kate stood again, taking her bag in her hand. “I don’t know, Eddie. Maybe this is a bad idea. I should probably go. I think it’s this room. This house. Micola. Everything. I feel like she’s here, watching us. I shouldn’t have come.”
Eddie leapt to his feet. “Kate, no. Please. Don’t go.”
Kate hesitated, thinking. “Is there somewhere else? Upstairs ...? Your room? Maybe the reminder of Micola won’t be there.” She wasn’t sure if he’d heard her over the music. She barely heard herself.
He nodded, a slight look of desperation in his eyes. “Sure. Yeah. We could do that. Come on.”
Kate bent over to pick up her glass of wine.
Eddie grabbed his glass too and moved to turn off the upbeat song.
Hating the silence, Kate said, “Do you have anything else you could play?”
“Sure.”
He set his wine glass on the coffee table and walked to the console. Moving quickly, she grabbed an opened packet of crushed sleeping pills from her jacket pocket and tipped it into his glass, spilling half of it onto the table. She frantically swept it onto the floor, while watching Eddie’s back. Her hand quickly returned to her pocket as he continued flipping through Micola’s album collection, humming. Kate watched his wine, praying the room was dim enough to hide the remaining white particles as they fell to the bottom of his glass.
“Here’s a good one,” Eddie said. He turned to her smiling. “Bing Crosby. Sound okay?”
“Perfect.”
After the music started, Eddie left for the kitchen to grab the bottle of wine. When he returned, he was smiling.
“Follow me.”