Once I aspired to

Humble black turtleneck sweaters

And spare unheated rooms

With the Kama Sutra, a few madrigals, and

Great literature and philosophy.

Once I considered money

Something to be against

On the grounds that

Credit cards.

Installment-plan buying.

And a joint checking account

Could never coexist with

Great literature and philosophy.

Once I believed

That the only kind of marriage I could respect

Was a spiritual relationship

Between two wonderfully spiritual human beings

Who would never argue about money

Because they would be too busy arguing about

Great literature and philosophy.

I changed my mind

Having discovered that

Spiritual is hard without the cash

To pay the plumber to unstop the sink

And pay a lady to come clean and iron

So every other Friday I can think about

Great literature and philosophy.

No one ever offers us a choice

Between the Kama Sutra and a yacht.

We’re always selling out for diaper service

And other drab necessities that got ignored in

Great literature and philosophy.

A jug of wine, a loaf of bread, and thou

No longer will suffice. I must confess

My consciousness is frequently expanded

By MasterCard. American Express, and things undreamed of in

Great literature and philosophy.

I saw us walking hand-in-hand through life.

But now it’s clear we really need two cars.

I looked with such contempt at power mowers,

But now, alas, that power mower’s ours.

It seems I’m always reaching for my charge plates,

When all I’d planned to reach for were the stars.

Great literature and philosophy.