Anna Mae jerked awake. She’d overslept. Sunshine filtered through her window. She sat up quickly and found Rose and Ruby grinning at her from their bed.
She knew without being told that Josiah had gone already. He left every morning long before the sun rose, so why should today be any different? Anna Mae thought about the night before and his harsh words.
It had been childish to hide in her room, but she just couldn’t face him. She’d known he wouldn’t be happy about Jersey, but he’d never spoken harshly to her before. It had been unexpected but deserved. He could have said what he wanted in a kinder manner, but she couldn’t fault him. Who knew what his day had been like before he’d come home to find even more responsibility?
“Good morning, ladies.” She smiled at the girls and pushed the covers back. “I overslept. I bet you two are starving.”
“Eat?” Rose asked hopefully.
Anna Mae laughed. “Yes, as soon as we’re all dressed and ready for our day.” She quickly put her words to action and had the girls dressed and walking into the kitchen within ten minutes.
“How about we have pancakes for breakfast this morning?” she asked, looking down at them.
“Sounds really good to me.”
Without glancing up, Anna Mae recognized her husband’s voice. He hadn’t gone to work. Was he sick? She looked up to find him studying her face. What did he hope to find? He didn’t appear sick. Had he stayed home to finish what they’d started the night before?
“Then you shall have as many as you like.” She offered him a wobbly smile. Why did she feel so close to tears again? Never in all her life had she felt the sting that his disappointment caused in her.
“Papa!” Rose and Ruby toddled as fast as their little legs would carry them, falling against his legs.
He swooped down and picked them both up at the same time. Josiah rubbed his face against theirs, causing more squeals.
The little girls’ joy brought a genuine smile to Anna Mae’s face. No matter what came their way, Josiah’s daughters made it all worthwhile. She’d give up the cow, if that’s what he wanted. Even though the previous afternoon she’d dreamed of all the things she could make. Soups, baked custards and cheese were at the top of her future menus.
Just thinking about them gave her renewed bravery. She’d try again to get him to let her keep the cow. He hadn’t exactly said they were getting rid of it, just that she’d have to learn not to be afraid of it, and that it would cost more to have.
As she made pancake batter, Anna Mae began to think of ways she could earn a little money to help keep Jersey. Maybe she could make cream or cheese and sell it to Carolyn at the general store.
Lost in thought, she didn’t realize Josiah was behind her until his arms snaked around her waist. She gave a little squeal, then tilted her head just as he fitted his face against hers.
“I’m sorry, Annie, for behaving like a raging boar yesterday. Can you forgive me?” Softly his breath fanned her face.
She sighed. How wonderful it felt to have a man apologize. She couldn’t recall her father ever apologizing to her mother. And Josiah’s arms felt so good around her, as if they were meant to enclose her.
Anna Mae tried hard not to read too much into it, but surely she could enjoy moments like this for what they were. He had hurt her feelings, and he recognized it and wasn’t willing to let it pass.
But perhaps he was expecting more. She pushed the thought away. No, Josiah was asking for forgiveness. Even if he was looking for more, she wasn’t. Her heart had been broken and still hadn’t mended from that embarrassment. Still, that same heart sang with delight that he cared about their friendship and had asked her to forgive him.
She tried to act nonchalant, but her voice broke with huskiness when she spoke. “You are forgiven, with one condition.”
He moved back but kept an arm about her waist. “I know, I know. I’ll do my best not to ever take my tiredness and frustration out on you again.”
Anna Mae shook her head, aware she hadn’t put her hair up this morning because she’d thought he was out of the house. “That’s not what I meant at all.” She poured batter into the heated pan. “I need you to forgive me, too.” She set the bowl down and wiped her hands on her apron. “Josiah, I’m so sorry I accepted the cow. A little voice in my head warned me you would be upset, but I was more afraid to offend the giver than I was you.”
He gave her waist a little squeeze. “There’s nothing to forgive. You did right in not wanting to hurt the old man’s feelings. But that still leaves the question, what do you think we should do now?” Josiah released her and rubbed the back of his neck.
Anna Mae knew he was talking about the cow. Was he hoping she’d say to give it back or sell the beast? Had he asked her only out of politeness, and actually planned on selling it regardless of what her answer might be? Or was that just what he did while trying to figure out what to do next? She decided that instead of questioning his motive for asking her, she’d just tell him what she thought they should do now.
“I guess you better teach me how to milk the dreadful animal.” Before he could protest, Anna Mae rushed on. “The girls need the fresh milk and I’m sure I can make cream and cheese with the excess and sell it to Carolyn at the store. That will help with the extra cost of hay and oats or whatever cows eat. What do you think?” She slid fluffy pancakes onto a plate and poured more batter into her hot pan.
Josiah nodded. “That might work.” He paused, looked up and grinned wickedly. “But someone has to build a corral and a shed to keep it in. It can’t stay in the barn forever.”
“Why not? And who would you get to help you?” Anna Mae knew he meant for her to help him, but couldn’t stop herself from teasing him back. Yet she really didn’t understand why the cow couldn’t stay in the barn.
“Cows are leaners. They like to lean against things. And they are heavy. Anything built for use around cattle must be very sturdy.” He picked up a couple plates and put a pancake on each one, then carried them to the table.
Rose and Ruby hurried to meet him there. “Up, eat.” They waved their arms in anticipation of being served breakfast.
“In a minute,” he told them, brushing the tops of their heads with his big hands. Josiah returned and picked up two more plates, one for himself and one for Anna Mae. “As for who is going to help me, I think you have the muscles to do that.”
Anna Mae jerked her arm away as he squeezed the upper part, testing her muscles. She giggled as if it had tickled. “So now we are building a lean shed for the cow and a chicken coop for the chickens.” With a serious expression she added, “I suppose that’s what I get for allowing the beasties on the farm.” She carried the pancakes and butter to the table.
Josiah grabbed a jar of blackberry preserves from the icebox and followed her. “Yep.” He set the jar down and proceeded to help the girls into their chairs.
Anna Mae wasn’t sure what to say. Was he teasing again? His tone had sounded very serious.
He straightened, his gaze met hers and he wiggled his eyebrows playfully. “I guess you’ll listen to that small voice next time someone gives us a wedding present. Especially if it’s in the form of some sort of animal, like a pig or a goat.”
She crinkled her nose at the thought of a dirty pig needing care. “I should say so.” She laughed.
Josiah blessed the meal and he and the girls began to eat. He laughed and teased Rose and Ruby as he helped them with their pancakes. Blackberry preserves would have to be washed from their hands and faces and even possibly their hair. Anna Mae didn’t mind. The girls never failed to put a smile on their father’s handsome face, and that made her happy, as well.
Now that she thought about it, Josiah had been serious every time she’d seen him in town. It was only at home that he allowed his softer, fun side to show. A smile touched her lips, because now she was part of his home life, and she liked it and her new husband.
“If you are thinking about getting a pig, stop thinking. I hate taking care of those dirty animals.” He shook his fork in her direction.
Anna Mae held her hands up in surrender. “No, I promise, no more barnyard animals.” She looked to the girls. Purplish-blue goo covered their mouths and cheeks. “Except maybe a dog or a kitten.” She laughed gleefully at the pained expression that covered his face. She could get used to married life if it stayed like this.
* * *
Josiah grinned at Anna Mae, enjoying the banter more than he ever expected to. “You know what this means now, don’t you?” He wiped the grin from his face and studied her over his coffee.
Confusion laced her pretty features. Her hair hung about her oval-shaped face, giving her a soft, delicate look. “That we have to go dog hunting?”
He shook his head in mock frustration. “No, it means we have to go to town for supplies.”
The thought of visiting town brightened her face. “Oh, that’s a wonderful idea. I want to buy some fabric. The girls need new dresses. I’d love to make them Christmas dresses and...” Her gaze moved to the kitchen. “We need more sugar, coffee and bacon.”
Josiah laughed. He found he laughed more around her than anyone. She brought joy out in him. Even Mary hadn’t been able to make him laugh as much as Anna Mae had in the last couple weeks. The thought sobered him.
“You might want to make a list, but I think we also need corn and oats. Not to mention I’m going to have to go to Mr. Green and see if he has extra hay for the cow.”
“Oh, that’s a great idea.” She jumped up and ran to her room.
Rose and Ruby looked at him in confusion. He shrugged. “I guess she went to get paper and pen. Who knows what that woman is doing?”
The little girls nodded as if they agreed. “Go,” Ruby said, pushing at the table.
“Oh, no, you don’t. You finish those pancakes and then we’ll go.”
Anna Mae returned with pencil and paper and an open book to make her writing neater. The pencil scraped rapidly across the page as she scribbled out her list. Her head was down and her hair created a curtain that hid her face. “I’d also like to get a few sheets of colored paper, if Carolyn has some.” She spoke more to herself than him.
“Annie?”
She looked up. Her brown eyes sparkled with excitement. “Yes?”
Josiah pushed away from the table. “I need to go hitch up the wagon. Do you think you can take care of things in here until I get back?” He looked pointedly at his sticky girls.
“Oh. Sure. I’ll give them a quick sponge bath and get them all prettied up.” She stopped. “Oh, before we leave I’ll need to feed the chickens.” Her nose wrinkled in distaste. “And learn how to milk Jersey.”
She looked so sweet with her nose all crinkled up and her lips curled. Josiah focused on pulling his boots on before answering. “I’ll take care of the animals this morning. This afternoon or tomorrow will be soon enough for you to take over.”
Her teeth flashed in a big smile. “Thanks, Josiah.”
That smile brightened his outlook on things while he hitched up the horse and checked on the other animals. The mule brayed in her stall. She probably wanted to get out and kick up her heels. Josiah made a mental note to ask Anna Mae if the little mule belonged to her or if they should tie it to the wagon and take it back to the school.
The sounds in the barn had changed in the past month. Once Roy was the only animal in there, but now there was a mule, a cow and three chickens. It was a noisy and warmer place to be. Anna Mae had changed his life in more ways than one since her arrival.
How much more change would she bring to his life? He thought of them as good friends, but would that alter? Could he grow to love her? Josiah shook his head. No, he couldn’t allow such thoughts to fill his mind. Mary had been the love of his life, and he could never allow anyone to take her place. Never.