| |
Betty Ingrid
––––––––
THE NEXT COUPLE OF weeks were the most surreal of Betty's life and for more than a couple of reasons. For starters, the series of dates Zach took her on bordered on unreal. Never before had she been on so many dates in such little time, and never with so much variety. In the span of two weeks, Betty went to more hole in the wall restaurants than she even knew existed, but also two different Michelin star restaurants as well. She went to her first opera, ballet, and basketball game, too. Every time she saw him, it was something different, and it was becoming increasingly difficult for her to separate what was real from what was only for show. Along with the dates came an ever-rising presence of the paparazzi and the media, which meant that for the first time in her life, she was somebody other people noticed. It wasn't a ton of people, not yet, but it was nothing she was used to. At the moment she was mostly touted as the "other woman" who was trying to take the place of the lovely Lucille. Lucille was busy playing the poor, suffering victim and in Betty's humble opinion, doing it very well. She had seen the severe-looking woman on more than one tv program talking about how she would still be there for him to come back to when he was done with his ‘last hurrah’ dalliances. Betty tried to remind herself that what she was involved with was a business deal and nothing personal, but she couldn't help it; she got to feeling almost territorial when Lucille said things like that as if Zach was truly something that belonged to her in the first place. Oh, and there was the fact that she was pretty sure she was pregnant. There was that, the thing she couldn't stop thinking about no matter where she was or what she was doing. Which, unfortunately, made it hard for her to act anything close to normal when he swept her off her feet for a romantic weekend at a remote cabin. It came with a ride on a private jet and everything, and all the while she thought about her potential baby.
"Betty? Are you okay with this?" Zach broke into her private, scattered thoughts. He moved up behind her with the glass of tea she had requested over a glass of wine, just in case. He set it on the side table and then settled into the rocking chair perched close to hers. She could feel his particular brand of heat even through the thick woolen blanket, and it made her shiver.
“Thanks,” she said gripping the mug in her hands and blowing across the top, “this is perfect. Definitely okay with it.”
"Well I'm glad to hear it, but that's not exactly what I meant."
“What did you mean?” she asked nervously. That was the worst part about the possibility of being pregnant. Everything that happened, everything Zach said, made her think she was going to be found out and all before she was sure there was any finding to be done. Except that she was sure, at least as sure as she could be without going to the doctor and having a blood test.
"I meant this trip. I know it was unfair of me, springing it on you the way I did. I know you've got a life outside of what happens between the two of us." She glanced at Zach when he said that, looking to see if there was any kind of hidden meaning in what he’d said, and saw that he was only peering out into the lightly falling snow outside. Maybe his mind wasn't going anywhere sexual then, but she couldn't keep hers from doing so, at least not entirely. The two of them hadn't gotten physical aside from the odd kiss here and there for the benefit of the cameras. That had been weeks ago, and yet she couldn't stop thinking about it. It was the first place her mind went, for God's sake, and at the most inopportune times. It was good that he was respecting the boundaries of their agreement, or at least that's what she told herself. She just wasn't sure how completely she believed it.
“I don’t, you know.”
"Don't what?" he asked, watching her with warm, kind eyes. How come she hadn't ever noticed how kind his eyes were before? And where the hell was all of these similarities between the two of them coming from all of a sudden?
"Don't have a life outside of this arrangement. I don't have a job anymore, which you well know." He winced, and she smiled to let him know she wasn't mad about it anymore.
“Right. Sorry about that. Again.”
"Don't be. I'd take this weird job over working at the diner any day. I don't know if you know this but being a waitress kind of sucks."
“I don’t doubt it,” he laughed, “not at all. But that’s not all you had, right? You still have school.”
“That’s right, I do. And thanks to you I’m actually going to be able to finish, and not in another five years. This is the only time in my entire school career that I’ve been able to pay for more than just a class or two at a time.”
“That’s awesome, Betty. Really, I’m glad to hear that.”
"Me too," she said thickly, appalled to find her eyes filling up with tears she absolutely would not allow herself to shed. "It makes it feel real. After all of this time, I can see that there's going to be something else. Something better, maybe."
“And what would that look like?”
“I’m not sure what you mean,” she said, coloring a little under the weight of his intent gaze.
“When you’re done with school. What do you want to do?”
“I don’t want to say. You’ll laugh.”
“I won’t, though. You should try giving me a little more credit.”
“I want to open my own restaurant.”
“Do you really?” he asked with surprise.
“I know, it sounds nuts, especially when I’ve just gotten through telling you how shitty it is to be a waitress. But I love the way food can bring people together. That part I’ve never gotten tired of. I want to open my own shop and do things right.”
“I think that’s lovely. And your family?”
“What about them?” She asked a little testily. She saw her tone register on his face and softened, if only slightly.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to strike a nerve. I was just wondering–”
"They aren't in the picture, and even if they were, they wouldn't be able to help. I grew up dirt poor, Zach, with nothing. I'm the only one of my family who's ever even considered going to college."
“But your folks have got to be proud of you for doing it, even if they don’t totally understand it.”
"You would think, right? Unfortunately, they're a little too busy being alcoholics to give it much thought. I'm on my own, Zach. Like, for real."
“You must think I’m such a douche,” he said quietly, almost sadly.
“What? Why? I didn’t say that at all.”
“Because of who I am. What my family has.”
"But you didn't take money from them, did you?" she asked gently. She could hardly believe she was defending him, but she didn't seem able to stop herself. There was something about him that looked so vulnerable she couldn't not come to his defense.
"No," he said in a long exhalation of breath, "no, I didn't. It's important to me to be my own man. I love my family, but I don't want anything from them. Taking things from them means obligations, and I don't want those. Not any of them."
Betty nodded, careful to keep a blandly interested look on her face. Inside, though, she felt like she was breaking apart. So that was his key motivator: avoiding any and all obligations. She didn't have any experience with the matter, but she had a sinking suspicion that a baby fell squarely into that category. She had no idea how she was supposed to go on and act like she was fine now, especially for a whole weekend, and she knew he was going to see the upset on her face. It looked like he might be about to ask her about it, too, when a very loud noise came from overhead.
“What the hell is that?” she asked, looking up quickly.
“Shit. It’s company, that’s what it is.”
