chapter two

Now that we’ve covered the basic background of unicorns, we’re going to start getting into the really good stuff. Here we’ll look at the things that unicorns use to call out and help us raise our vibration. These unicorn tools are all about vision and reflection. When I say “vision,” I mean both external (physical) and internal (spiritual) sight. And “reflection” covers the various ways that unicorn energy causes us to self-reflect and also take focused consideration of the world around us.

Mirrors, Moons, and Reflecting Ponds

Unicorns like to see beauty, especially their own. As a result, they can be spellbound by the sight of their reflection and are associated with mirrors, reflecting ponds, and the light of the moon. These symbols can present in your life in several ways. These include:

Self-Reflection

Self-reflection is about self-acknowledgment and casting light into shadow places. It presents itself in both positive and negative ways. Both are beneficial when we make full use of them instead of trying to brush them aside.

Our self-reflection might come about as appreciation of our own strengths and qualities, but it might first appear as shock over seeing past our protective surface ego. When this happens, we may realize we’ve been acting in a way that doesn’t align with who we truly are. Feelings of grief, shame, anger, and more might come up over how we’ve been acting toward others and ourselves. It can be confusing. Our true reflection might seem blurry and hard to put into focus.

There are ways we can move through any issues that might be holding us back from embracing our true reflection. These include talk therapy, journaling, creative expression such as art or music therapy, or reading self-help books. Other activities that we’ll discuss in this book can help point us in the right direction as well, like decluttering, meditation, and finding our hidden passions. These actions help us let go of our false self and move forward. When we actively do this, it’s much easier to see and honor who we truly are. We may begin to realize and appreciate our core strengths, skills, and qualities that we hadn’t appreciated before.

Working with moon energy is about attending to the dark spaces and eventually lighting up the things that often remain hidden. If we venture into the dark, we can see our shadow side set against our true self. Doing this doesn’t come without pain and discomfort. (Think of the folklore that says the full moon increases instances of labor.) Illuminating what we try not to know or acknowledge most of the time can be hard to do. When we’re finally ready or forced to face these shadows, it can bring new opportunities to light and allow new seeds of possibility to be carried into the day.

One of my shadow places is the feeling of isolation caused by chronic illness. For a very long time I tried to sweep the “aloneness” under the rug, but eventually the time was ripe for finding a different way. I needed help to break cycles of chronic complaining and feelings of hopelessness and defeat. This wasn’t easy to face and is an ongoing journey. When I finally realized I needed a different outlet, I became very depressed. Instead of feeling like I was gaining new branches of support, I just felt like I was losing connection with the people I had previously confided in. Part of my shadow side was seeing that the way I was handling my challenges was not really helping me and was also draining the ones I loved the most.

Like I mentioned before, sometimes we need assistance as we’re working through the shadows. I linked to other hands that were searching for light in the dark in the same way that I was. As I sought new resources, my sense of isolation subsided and I gained new understanding and tools to make use of.

Sometimes seeing ourselves in the reflection of someone else and being able to say, “Me too!” can reawaken hope, relief, joy, and validation that we thought was lost long ago. We can feel so alone in our lives for so many different reasons. Hope can be a hard thing to find. In our minds and maybe also in our bodies and physical spaces, we might feel very isolated. But when the moon comes around, I always imagine her saying, “Hey, I see you! No hiding now. I’m right here and I’ll leave the light on so you can see you too.” She hovers round and wide, pregnant with possibility, and holds back the dark. In the light we can find truth and all the things we thought we’d lost of ourselves. Secrets and lies have less space to hide when a flame is being held into the shadows.

This doesn’t mean these revealing moments of self-examination are always beautiful. When the literal moon becomes unavoidable, I’m usually annoyed because I can’t hide from the light and I end up sleeping less soundly. On the other hand, I also feel comforted and have a stronger sense of a cosmic guardian guiding and watching over me. When we’re reminded of this feeling, it can make it easier to open up through our shadow work so that we can move on to a truer reflection of our strengths and positive qualities.

exercise 3

Seeing Your Reflection

Look in a mirror and really see yourself with your own eyes. Try to see yourself in this way for thirty seconds each night before you go to bed or each morning when you’re getting ready for the day. This simple practice can be very challenging and emotional, especially when you first start out, so be gentle with yourself. Practice offering yourself compliments during this time. As you look into your own eyes, ask yourself what you can do for yourself for self-care. You might be surprised at the answers that come bubbling up.

Synchronicity

Synchronicity is a repetition of similar events, like déjà vu. It is meaningful coincidences that seem to be pointing you to a certain action or understanding as you go about your days. Even though the events themselves occur independently of one another, they feel intimately connected and significantly related. They are “reflecting experiences” that repeat like in a carnival mirror room—separate images that seem to be conveying the same message.

tip 3

Trusting the Message of Synchronistic Events

If you’re hesitant to believe the message that synchronicities are trying to impart to you, write them down. Record the day, time, and details of the events. More events may crop up that support the original synchronistic details, providing you with further reassurance of the message.

unicorn

A memorable synchronistic event happened for me as I was contemplating potential surgery for multiple medical conditions. I’d been hoping I could kill two birds with one stone and hit everything that needed to be done in a single surgery instead of two. One doctor agreed to do this. But to receive the best treatment, I felt that I needed the expertise of two different physicians. I wasn’t sure which doctor to go with first, and I also kept wondering whether I should skip one of the procedures altogether. I was afraid it wouldn’t work and might even make things worse. There was no way of knowing until I tried and succeeded … or failed. It was unnerving and I couldn’t make up my mind.

One morning as I pulled out of my driveway on the way to work, my mind was fixated on these looping anxious thoughts. I made my way up a hill and around a bend into the one intersection in my subdivision. In the middle of the crossroads was a bright red cardinal sitting in the road. I thought about how odd it was since the only time I ever saw cardinals in the area was on the rare occasion when one would fly quickly through the yard. Even more surprising was the fact that it didn’t walk or even fly away as I drove past. It didn’t look injured; it just appeared unfazed by my presence.

I drove on, winding my way through wooded roads. Just as I was climbing up the next hill, an orange-yellow bird flew in front of my windshield. It felt like slow motion. The image I saw was like a feathered sun as it seemed to hover momentarily, flapping its wings right in front of my face. I was startled but immediately started laughing.

Putting the two bird encounters together created a reassuring message that I couldn’t dismiss. For months I’d felt unsettled and I was running out of time to decide what to do. Now I could see that there were indeed two birds that needed to be addressed. One surgery would align with the energy center in the body known as the first chakra, which is red and located at the base of the spine. The other would align with the second and third chakras, which are orange and yellow, located in the lower and the upper abdomen. The cardinal seemed to be saying, “Be still and wait,” while the second bird came to the forefront, demanding immediate attention and action. This was indeed how things played out, and thankfully all ended well.

When synchronicity is calling to you, it’s not just about coincidental events. Like we talked about before with unicorns, there is a sense of amazement when these events align. It will leave your jaw dropped, your hair raised, your emotions heightened. Your logical mind can try all day to deny it, but the energy surrounding the synchronistic events won’t allow you to simply dismiss the message being delivered as just an everyday occurrence. This is magic that demands to be seen, heard, and felt. You could deny it, but in your gut you know there’s something to it. If you’re still hesitant to believe the message that synchronicities are trying to impart to you, write them down. Record the day, time, and details of the events. More events may crop up that support the original synchronistic details, providing you with further reassurance of the message.

Magnified Moments

Mirrors and reflections can sometimes show distorted representations of reality. When this happens in our daily lives, I call them “magnified moments.” You’ll notice them when time seems to slow and the event feels enhanced. This can be a large event or a seemingly very minor and mundane one. Either way, there’s a sense of importance about it that’s trying to get you to pay attention.

I once had this happen when my husband, Luke, was talking to me about potentially working longer days so that I could get out earlier on Fridays. “I could never do that,” I responded automatically. But my response played out like a slowed video and my thoughts split. As I said “I could never do that,” another part of my mind thought, “Huh, maybe I can.” It might feel almost like someone outside of you is opening your mind and dropping in a counterthought for you to ponder in place of your automatic reaction. It catches on the gears, slows time, and gets you thinking.

decoration

On the surface, this example seemed like an extremely minor event. Why would unicorn energy bother with this? Maybe it was to show me that I can do things that I tell myself I can’t. This is a pattern we all have. We see ourselves within certain parameters, and sometimes we need to be shown that these boundaries are self-created. On another level, though, once I changed my work schedule, I was able to more easily pursue other interests that eventually led to new opportunities. Without that initial shift, I might not have explored those interests in a way that led to positive changes and achievements.

In another instance, back when I was in middle school, I was prepping for a report on what I wanted to do as a career. This was always a question I was baffled by and stressed over from a young age. How was I supposed to know? When a classmate asked what I was going to write about, even though I hadn’t realized it before that moment, I heard myself say as if in slow motion, “I want to be a book illustrator so that I can read books for a living.” It was like someone else had spoken the words for me. While I didn’t end up becoming an illustrator, my visual interests are what got me a foot in the door of the publishing world, and now I do in fact read books for a living. The odds of this happening baffle my mind, but magnified moments don’t lie. They speak slowly and they speak the truth.

exercise 4

Watch for Distorted Moments

If you notice any distorted moments that come up, write them down. Note the event, what happened, what was said, who was there, and what thoughts came up in your mind as the event unfolded. Think about whether the event seemed to be calling for you to take some kind of action, and if so, what that might be. Also record any lingering questions you have about it all. Keep a record of how things unfold from there. You may end up with confirmation about why your magnified moment happened in the first place and why unicorn energy was asking you to look at and consider the details of this particular event.

Imagination

We touched on imagination in chapter 1, but we’re coming back around to look at it in more detail because it’s an important unicorn tool—vital, in fact. We make use of imagination to help capture the things that bring us joy in a lot of different ways. By allowing our imagination to unfold in moments of creativity, play, meditation, and exploration, we open ourselves to new potential and all of the sparkly magic that unicorns are about.

Remember that the assumption that imagination is frivolous and reveals only false things isn’t a truthful rule to abide by. Instead, consider that the imagination is a powerful ability that can lead you to find truth as well as create it. It can help you build your inspired reality and connect you to your spiritual experience, leading you to your authentic self.

Our imagination is centered at the sixth (third eye) chakra, which aligns with the placement and power of the unicorn horn. Chakras are wheels of energy that exist within our subtle energy body, overlaying the physical body. They have their origin in the ancient and sacred texts known as the Vedas. From this Indian tradition, seven chakras are most often described, and they run down the middle of the body from head to tailbone. These include:

chakra

For now, we’ll be focusing on the sixth chakra and the skill of intuitive sight, since this is what’s active when we’re using our imagination. We’ll look more at the other chakras in the next chapter when we see which stone each chakra aligns with, and again in chapter 5 when we learn how to work with the chakras to clear out the energy of old blocks and wounds. We’ll also learn about the rest of the intuitive abilities in more detail in chapter 6.

Try to remember how you used your imagination as a kid. Maybe you played house and pretended to cook and eat food, clean dishes, and care for baby dolls. You might have crafted clay and Play-Doh into pretend treasures or told your made-up stories through colored pictures. You might have loved making a fort in the woods or the snow and pretended it was a real house or castle. Perhaps you even had an imaginary friend. There are so many possibilities of how you made use of your imagination. As children, it’s second nature to envision a new kind of reality in this way. Even when you were unaware of it, you used this ability to help you gather new information so that you could better understand the world and how to function in it.

As we get older and become more and more enmeshed in the “real world,” it becomes harder to use this intuitive sight. Instead of envisioning innumerable possibilities and then embarking on creating what we imagined, we look to the world to tell us what’s real. Most of the time when we’re accessing imagination, it’s during moments when we’re being creative. If it comes up at other times, we usually end up dismissing the information that our imagination tries to bring to us. “It was just my imagination,” we often tell ourselves. By doing this, we shrink the boundaries of our reality. In order to tune into the magic of our lives and open to all kinds of new potential, we need to stop belittling and dismissing this gift. We’ll work on reawakening our use and acceptance of our imagination throughout this book in different ways, but first we’ll begin by learning how to open our third eye.

exercise 5

Opening to Your Intuitive Sight

One way you can help reawaken your sixth chakra and become aware of your psychic sight is by practicing this zipper exercise. It’s one that’s often taught in beginner-level psychic development classes to learn how to open up and close down your third eye. Some people worry that “closing down” chakras is a dangerous practice, but what we’re doing here doesn’t equate to shutting down your energy in any kind of harmful way. We’re working with our imagination to tap into our energy. This kind of activity helps us become more aware of our subtle intuition and also assists in creating healthy energy boundaries. A good time to practice this would be before bed, because you’ll be closing the third eye at the end, which can help to calm the mind and prepare for sleep.

Get in a comfortable position and close your eyes. Imagine a zipper running from the top of your head down the front of your face. Picture grasping the zipper toggle and pulling it slowly down your forehead. As you do, a light shines through. This is your third-eye chakra opening up. See its shimmering purple radiance spilling out around you.

unicorn

Now allow your mind to clear and pay attention to whatever imagery floats to the surface. Try not to fixate on or engage with any one image. Don’t judge the imagery that comes to you. Just allow it and observe it from the sidelines. Pay attention to the details that are being shown to you.

When you’re ready to leave this space, go back to visualizing the open zipper. Grasp the toggle again, and this time imagine closing it all the way up to the top of your head. Brush away the zipper like you’re sweeping your hand through a layer of sand, and see it dissolve away. Feel the difference when your third eye is closed.

When you’re back in the present, write down the things you saw during your visualization practice. Every so often, maybe once a week or once a month, go back and read the things your imagination shared with you. Notice whether anything aligns with events that have unfolded in your life. Pay attention to whether you’re able to more easily understand any of the imagery. Maybe there’s a pattern that’s becoming apparent and you can see what your imagination is trying to guide you toward.

By practicing with your third eye in this way, you’re sending cues to your intuitive sight that you’re receptive to these kinds of messages. Imaginative energy is reawakened. Just like working out to strengthen the body’s muscles, practice with the third eye will eventually lead to increased ability.

Beauty

Beauty is an excellent way that unicorn energy calls to us. Have you ever been stopped in your tracks and had your breath taken away by something unexpected and beautiful? Maybe it was even something you thought you were prepared for, but the reality of loveliness overwhelmed you more than you imagined it would. These moments remind us of our own magnificent potential and the beautiful life we have the ability to create.

For one person, this beauty might be an unexpected waterfall at the end of a long hike. For another, it might be music by a favorite performer. However, it doesn’t have to fit within the typical norm of what we define beauty to be. Yes, it’s true that often art, music, and nature fit into this category. But it could also be old barnwood or junkyard materials that someone drools over, thinking of the potential for reclamation. Or it could be someone else finding beauty in complex mathematical problems. I was once caught by the composition, texture, and color created by maintenance paint over a sidewalk near a sewer hole, so much so that I took a photo of it. It hangs in my art studio for inspiration. Talk about beauty in unexpected places!

Sometimes we just can’t predict where and when beauty will strike us; this is a part of unicorns calling. They appear at unexpected times and in unpredictable ways. Wherever you find beauty, soak it in. And if you hear your spirit reaching out and saying, “I need more of this,” it’s one breadcrumb on your path to finding what makes you light up from the inside out. Honor those requests as much as you can.

Dreams

Dreams help awaken the third eye to enlightened energy. Like I mentioned when we looked at imagination, the placement and power of the unicorn horn is in alignment with the third eye, and this chakra has a lot to do with visualization and psychic sight.

There are different forms of unicorn dreams that you might have. These include:

No matter the form, a unicorn dream is rare and something to be treasured. These aren’t your typical every-night kind of dreams. Their effect on you will be magnified and obvious, leaving a feeling of amazement and positivity that sticks with you for days, months, or even years.

Dreams Featuring a Unicorn as a Symbolic Message

If you dream of a unicorn and it seems to be mixed in with a more average dream, it’s likely that this is a symbolic dream and not a visitation. In this case, when you’re interpreting the meaning of the dream, think back to the unicorn’s characteristics that we covered in chapter 1. In her book Animal Frequency (pages 382–383), Melissa Alvarez describes the symbolism of the unicorn by breaking it down into the following categories:

traits: Unicorn symbolizes purity, innocence, faith, intuition, and enchantment. It is all that is right within the universe and is a connection to the higher realms of spirituality. It signifies the higher self, a gentle nature, a pure heart, and a loving and giving nature. Peace and inner calm, righteousness, and belief in things others may not see.

tip 4

star star star

The Different Forms
of Unicorn Dreams

There are different forms of unicorn dreams that you might have. These include:

• Dreams featuring a unicorn as a symbolic message

• Visitation dreams from guides and guardians

• Dreams of great energetic impact

• Visitation dreams from deceased loved ones

unicorn

talents: A connection to all that is, a giving heart, beauty, innocence, kindness, patience, perfection, positive beliefs, purity, spirituality, unity, virtue, wisdom

challenges: Being ditzy, being naïve, flighty, impractical expectations, tendency to live in a fantasy world

element(s): Earth, water

primary color(s): White

appearances: Unicorns often appear when it’s time to connect to your core essence, inner being, and higher self. It can mean your spirit guides are trying to reach you, but you’re not listening. When you see a unicorn, stop what you’re doing and listen telepathically for unique messages. It means to believe in yourself and have faith that everything will work out how the universe intends. Connecting with a 1unicorn means to delve into your own exceptional creativity and to open yourself to the enchanting ways of the mystical realms, to believe in your intuition and psychic abilities. It means it’s time to experience spiritual growth and to discover the mysteries of the universe. You are pure of heart and connected to the divine.

assists when: You are experiencing spiritual growth, are working on developing your intuition or psychic abilities, are connecting with your spirit guides, and are searching for the meaning of your life. Unicorn helps you learn patience and to have faith in that which you cannot see. If you’ve been feeling out of sorts or stressed out, unicorn helps you to see the miracles in your life. If you’ve lost touch with the beauty of your relationship with the world around you, unicorn helps you see with a sense of wonder and awe. If you feel burdened with too much responsibility, or are feeling depressed or anxious, unicorn helps to clear away the negativity, release judgmental tendencies, and replace these with a positive lightness of being. Unicorn can travel throughout the universe, so it can guide you during your own travels. Seeing unicorn means to trust in your instincts and soul essence, your true nature. Unicorn allows you to see purity and beauty in everything.

frequency: Unicorn’s frequency is magical like the tinkling sound of chimes or small high-pitched bells. It is light and airy and flows like a gentle breeze. It is reflective like the light of the moon and when connected to your frequency can inspire and raise you to even higher frequencies.

When interpreting unicorn dream symbolism, you might also consider the specific appearance of how the unicorn showed itself to you. Did it have the steady strength of a broad horse? Or did it present with the litheness of a graceful gazelle? Maybe wisdom or knowledge was symbolized by its beard/goatee. If the unicorn was slight of stature, this may be a sign that you can hold power, even in a delicate state. Pay attention to its specific physical characteristics, and think about what it might be saying in terms of qualities and strengths that it’s encouraging you to embrace in this moment of your life.

Visitation Dreams from Guides and Guardians

It may be that your dream is actually a true visitation from a unicorn who is acting as a guide. Visitation dreams have an air of significance. Strong positive emotion and energy remains with you long after these dreams, almost as though you’ve been cocooned in buoyancy for a time. When a spirit guide or guardian comes to you in a dream (whether in unicorn form or not), it’s a strong sign that you’re in a phase of growth and transition. If you’ve been asking for confirmation of the presence of your guide, this is their response.

How can you be certain that this is a true visitation and not just a regular dream of your mind processing your day or coming up with random stories? I can always tell a visitation dream from an average one because when it’s a true visitation, I usually wake up within the dream. I might not become fully lucid, but I’ll at least begin to question whether or not I am actually awake or am dreaming. This has happened enough times that I’ve been able to be a more active participant in the dream.

It can be a challenge not to wake up when you realize you’re dreaming. If you find yourself experiencing this kind of thing, something you can do to stabilize the dream is to focus on a certain detail of an item around you in the dream. Once you’re comfortable with the fact that you’re dreaming, you can try to consciously interact with your guides. The more that lucid dreaming occurs for you, the better you’ll get at it, but for me it remains a rare occurrence that highlights the importance of a dream.

Even if lucidity is not part of your experience, these types of visitation dreams still impart a great deal of love, affection, nurturing, protection, and intimate connection. If you feel incredibly safe and as though your energy is becoming expansive, these are all signs of a visitation. Even if you can’t remember the specifics of the dream, you may also awaken feeling as though you’ve gained newfound wisdom. If you feel like you were given valuable wisdom that you can no longer recall, don’t worry. It just means that your guide or guardian shared it with you on a level that’s hard to access consciously. It’s still there and you’re still making use of it.

exercise 6

Meditation after a Visitation Dream

Don’t worry if lucid dreaming isn’t something that you experience during a visitation dream. I consider it to be a bonus, not a necessity. There’s still a great deal that you can get out of visitation dreams, even if you can only consciously consider them after you’ve awakened. Once you’re awake, go through all the details of what occurred in the dream, who appeared, what it felt like, etc. If you want to consciously commune with this guide further, you can go into a meditation as a follow-up practice. Envision the same scene you were in during your dream and then see how things unfold from there within the meditation while you are awake.

Dreams of Great Energetic Impact

A unicorn may appear as your guide in a visitation dream, but instead of seeing a defined figure, it’s more likely you’ll have a dream that allows you to experience a heightened connection to energy and love. These dreams will leave you with a sense of amazement because you’re so immersed in the details: the feel, sights, sounds, smells, tastes. Colors in these dreams are vibrant. Energy is something you can easily see and understand. It’s an experience that leaves a strong imprint, sometimes even years later.

Instead of seeing a unicorn figure, you’re brought into an environment that explores all the magic they represent. You might have a dream that gives you a peek at another realm or shows you how you can move energy and connect easily with plants, animals, other people, and even those in spirit.

In one such dream, I had died and wanted to comfort my husband and let him know that I was still there, but he wasn’t able to hear me as a spirit. A fox came to me and allowed my spirit to merge into his physical body as a way to get my husband to hear me. I ran through the woods as the fox and eventually jumped into a deer, a rabbit, a frog, and even a drop of water that rolled along the edge of a pond. Just before the drop merged into the greater body of water, I awoke. My own fear of losing myself if I became one with the larger body of energy caused me to wake up, but I always wonder what I would have experienced if I’d let myself continue. The small portion of the dream that I did get to experience left me amazed at the sense of connection I felt from the morphing experience and the loving offering of assistance from so many different beings.

Visitation Dreams from Deceased Loved Ones

This category is different from the others because it’s not about unicorns specifically. You might dream of a unicorn that is symbolic, connect with its impressive energy, or receive a visitation from your unicorn guide or other guardians. These dreams have more obvious unicorn associations. I also consider visitation dreams from loved ones to be unicorn dreams because true visitations are rare and you never know when or to whom the loved one is going to appear.

When a loved one passes away, those who are left behind often hope for a visitation in some form. Yet for whatever reason, these visitation dreams frequently end up being imparted to those who are outside of the immediate circle. So instead of a father, mother, or sibling being on the receiving end, the visitation is experienced by a friend or coworker, who then might relay it to the core family. I believe this is due to the fact that those who most immediately share life experience and familial energy with the deceased person are too blocked from grief to make a clear connection. Even in normal circumstances, our physical energy resonates at a denser vibration than spirit. For communication to come through, often we have to meet in the middle, with spirit lowering their energy while we raise ours. (Psychic mediums connect with those who’ve passed on and are skilled at raising their energy so that it’s easier for spirit communication to occur.) When we’re in the throes of grief, our energy becomes even lower. Before direct communication can occur, we need time to heal.

unicorn

This happened after my older sister, Amy, died. In life we had been so connected, especially when it came to spiritual and psychic interests. She was a yoga instructor and I a massage therapist, and we were both intrigued by alternative and energetic therapies. We would sometimes practice our intuitive abilities together and always knew when the other was about to call. So if a visitation came from her, I’d hoped and assumed it would be to me.

Instead, we heard of visitations that came to others. I had plenty of dreams where Amy appeared, but they were odd, confusing, and dark. Instead of visitations, these were dreams of my mind trying to process her death and my grief. Eventually, as time began to heal the pain, visitation dreams from Amy did come to me. These kinds of dreams share the beautiful intensity of dreams of great energetic impact and the lucidity of visitations from guides and guardians. Often, visitations from deceased loved ones impart a sense of community and share a continued storyline of how your loved one is doing and what they’ve been up to.

In one such dream, Amy was at a sunny outdoor family gathering with other deceased family members, and I was invited just long enough to receive a hug from her and a glimpse of the festivities from a distance. Her hug is always a moment within these visitation dreams when I become very lucid. In another visitation, I was in a school theater filled with people and Amy was sitting next to me. I was very aware of the fact that she had passed, which is also something that causes me to become lucid within these dreams. I noticed that she was breathing and thought, “She shouldn’t need to breathe anymore. They must do that to seem more normal and not freak us out.”

I wondered what Amy had been up to since her passing, and in response to that thought, I saw a door with a doodled heart on it. (Amy always signed her name with this styled heart, and it became a symbol of her for our family.) Amy was “opening the door” for people to walk through, helping others achieve their dreams with philanthropy and creative endeavors. In the theater, the screen lit up and the words that appeared on it read, “Thank you, Amy.” There was a swelling sense of pride that washed over the space, and I realized that everyone was gathered there to celebrate and thank her for the achievements she’d made in helping others during her time in spirit.

There’s nothing quite like a visitation dream. Thinking of this last one still makes me tear up every time. If you have lost someone you love, I hope the unicorn blesses you with its presence to help soothe and heal your loss.

How to Prepare, Ask For, and Record
Your Unicorn Dreams

For the most part, unicorn dreams follow their own agenda. Unicorns are elusive until they decide to make themselves known. They flit in, leave us in awe, and then disappear until the magical moment they decide to return again. While there’s usually an unknown timing to their appearance, there are things we can do to encourage their visits. This is especially the case for visitation dreams of guides and guardians. Becoming regularly aware of your dreams makes it much more likely that you’ll catch unicorn dreams when they arrive. Instead of brushing them off or forgetting them entirely, you’ll be ready to catch them.

preparation: Keep paper and a writing utensil by your bed so you can easily write down your dreams when you wake up. Set up your sleeping space so it’s calming to you. Don’t have a TV or cell phone in the space. Eliminate blue lights and electromagnetic frequencies as much as possible, since these disturb our natural sleep patterns and can hinder our ability to get into the deeper levels of sleep where we dream. Keep the space cool if you can. Sometimes adding weight, like extra comforters or a weighted blanket, can help you relax and sleep better. Do something that relaxes you before bed, like reading or journaling, to get the cluttered thoughts of the day out of your mind. Don’t eat within two hours of bedtime if you can help it, as having an active stomach can disrupt your quality of sleep.

ask for a unicorn dream: Whether the dream ends up being symbolic, energetic, or a form of visitation, you can encourage the appearance of a unicorn dream by asking for one. Before you go to sleep, say out loud or in your mind, “I am open to experiencing a unicorn dream.”

journal your dreams: This doesn’t have to be an in-depth description. Just jotting down a line or two each morning from whatever you can remember of your dreams is enough to cue your mind to the fact that it should be helping you remember these messages when they arrive. When you receive an obvious unicorn dream, go into more detail when you record it. Write down what you saw, who else was present, and whatever seemed to be the heart of the message that was being imparted. If no words were spoken, then pay attention to the imagery and emotions that were involved. For example, whether the environment was calm and peaceful or vibrantly alive with energy can guide you to what it was trying to tell you. Take a crack at interpreting what the various dream images symbolized as well.

Passions

When we’re on the lookout for how we can make our lives glitter and glow, attending to our passions should be high on the list. When we find the activities, actions, people, and places that make us feel alive and purposeful, we are that much closer to living the unicorn dream. Our passions can heighten our senses, leave us lost in time, bring pleasure, and impart a feeling of purpose. They energize and motivate us.

As an extreme procrastinator, I know that a very authentic passion will smash that hesitating tendency to bits. Breaking down personal barriers is one thing, but passions tend to break down outer obstacles as well. The drive that comes to back up a passion often finds a way to push through to the other side of challenges, even for something that might initially seem insurmountable.

That all sounds pretty great, but it’s not very helpful if you don’t know what your passions are to begin with. It’s not always a given that we know. For some people, their passion is an obvious talent or skill, but possessing a certain ability doesn’t always mean that’s our true passion. So how do we discover what our true passions are? To figure it out, ask yourself these questions:

Playfulness is the map to our simple pleasures. Those pleasures are the breadcrumbs leading us to what our true passions are. For example, in the movie P.S. I Love You, the main character, Holly, loves shoes. Her closet is stuffed with them, and it seems this is the one luxury she allows herself, although she makes it very clear she’s only able to indulge because she buys them from eBay. Even though she’s living on a budget, she finds a way to access something that she really enjoys. When Holly is searching for her calling, she stumbles upon the realization that designing shoes is her passion in life, although up until that point she never could have imagined it.

The point here is that our passion is usually staring us right in the face, hidden in plain sight. Look at what you’re already having fun with. Even if it’s not something you’re acting on yet in a passion-driven way, it could be the seed of potential you’ve been looking for.

When she was still in the midst of her search, Holly said, “All I know is, if you don’t figure out the ‘something,’ you’ll just stay ordinary. And it doesn’t matter if it’s a work of art or a taco or a pair of socks. Just create something new and there it is, and it’s you, out in the world, outside of you. And you can look at it or hear it, or read it, or feel it, and you know a little bit more about you. A little bit more than anybody else does” (LaGravenese and Rogers 2007).

tip 5

star star star

Discovering Your True Passions

So how do you discover what your true passions are? To figure it out, ask yourself these questions:

• What inspires you?

• Where do you lose track of time and feel your energy expanding?

• What are you already doing and tinkering around with that you enjoy?

• What comes to you without effort?

• What feels as though it is asking to be expressed?

decoration

When Holly says you’ll stay “ordinary,” I take this to mean that if you don’t make the effort to identify and act on your passions, however big or small they may be, you will lose out on really knowing yourself. You will miss out on being able to know your extra-ordinary self and truly shine.

Your passions don’t have to be extravagant things. You don’t need to be a perfect pianist or the best chef in the world. Plunking around on the piano can be just as strong a passion, even if it sounds a bit terrible. If you adore baking but don’t see it as your life’s calling, that’s okay. It can still be a passion. The test is in how happy it makes you.

Part of what clarified my own passions was looking at the things I pinned on Pinterest or was drawn to on Instagram. From there, I could see what images captivated me most, where I find beauty, and what words sucked me in. This helped me realize a minor passion for shabby interior design and a very large passion for textile art and poetry. These were things I’d dabbled in for a long time but hadn’t felt confident enough in to make my own.

Once I saw the true passion though, I fully acknowledged and acted on it. Watching for cheap vintage things that I could repurpose became a really fun hobby, and little by little my home space transformed into the shabby chic style I love. I let go of other creative outlets I’d attempted over the years and focused on my textile hoop art with embroidery, weaving, and painting. And I promised myself that I’d write at least one poem every day for a month, which led to a more steady writing habit that continued long after. When I made these passions something I was watchful for and active about, their everyday presence led to a natural uptick in happiness.

Unicorns are passionate about themselves and the happiness of the creatures around them. When we feed our own passions and light ourselves up, we light up those around us along the way.

Personal Quirks

In a similar way to how you are looking for your passions, also look at the things that make up your personal quirks. Don’t get caught up on the word quirks though. I don’t mean broken or dysfunctional. The kind of quirks that unicorn energy makes use of are the things about you that set you apart and make you interesting and unique. Often these are the exact things we try to hide from society and even those who are closest to us, at least until we build enough self-confidence with being ourselves. This is because our interests or actions may not be well understood or accepted by others and may be judged as weird or odd. As a survival instinct, many of us end up trying to bury our uniqueness as much as we possibly can in an attempt to simply blend in.

The reason it’s important to look for and embrace the things that make you different is because unicorn energy flows through what makes you you. Your quirks are there for a reason. Just like with our passions, when we light up our quirky selves, we inspire others to do the same. How much better would the world be if we could all be our true interesting selves?

You can try to embrace the magic of your passions and everything that makes you joyful, but fully integrating all of your hidden quirks puts the missing puzzle piece into place. It makes things click and acts as a kind of power enhancement because you’re no longer denying who you are. Instead of always trying to find and seek out the sparkle moments in your external life, you embody that energy and find it sprinkling out of you as you move about your days.

Another reason it’s so important to look at our quirks is because they’re often tied very closely to our passions. Looking for your quirks can be yet another thing that helps you figure out what your passions are.

Think about the unexpected or unconventional things about yourself that you can embrace. Maybe your passion drives your quirkiness; if it’s some obscure thing that no one else around you does, that could be it. Maybe you keep Christmas decorations up all year round because they make you really happy. Maybe you have a collection of something that others might find odd but you absolutely love. Or perhaps you’re drawn to a unique hobby or niche interest that most people don’t have a lot of knowledge about. Here in my home state of Wisconsin, there’s a competition where participants try to do their best impersonation of a cow. It’s something enough people are enthusiastic about doing that it’s become an event. Who knew?

One of my quirks growing up was an avid interest in metaphysics. Spirit communication, psychic ability, and energy therapies were all fascinating to me. This was before New Age material became more mainstream, so it was something I hid from most people. It wasn’t until I connected with others who I knew shared the same interests that I became more open about it.

I find my interest in this material to be less of a quirk now because I’ve embraced it to the point that it plays a role in my everyday life. It’s just a part of who I am. I talk to spirits. I practice energy work. I actively use my psychic abilities, so much so that my husband often exclaims with a laugh, “Get out of my head!” when I’ve heard his thoughts before he’s had a chance to say them out loud. But for people who don’t know these things about me or who don’t have these similar interests, finding this out about me can definitely seem unusual.

Think about the things that make you who you are. Think especially about the things that you tend to try to hide from people. Consider the reasons why you feel you can’t share all of who you are with others. Don’t judge it; it’s fine if you feel that you need to keep some of your quirks to yourself for now. Even if that’s the case, there are still ways you can nurture them. Finding library books, an online group, or an in-person class you can take to connect with others who have the same unique interests could all be good places to start.

Your Unicorn People

The final unicorn tool we’ll be looking at in this chapter is our unicorn people. Animals, especially significant pets, can also fall in this category, but for simplicity’s sake I’ll be calling them “people” too. Unicorn people come in two types:

Long-Lasting Unicorns:
People Who Inspire and Support You

Long-lasting doesn’t necessarily mean these individuals are a part of your life for years or decades. They may have been your teacher for a year or even a short-term sub. But they were with you long enough to make a lasting impact that helped to inspire and nurture you in some way. It’s likely that they were someone who took an interest in your well-being. However, they might also be someone you’ve never actually met. Perhaps they’re someone you heard about and something about them stayed with you in a meaningful way.

tip 6

star star star

The Different Forms of Your Unicorn People

Your unicorn people come in two types:

Long-Lasting Unicorns: People who inspire and nurture you

Short-Burst Unicorns: People who dip in and out of your life in moments of need, offering acts of kindness at just the right time

Some of my long-lasting unicorns include a grandparent, a great-uncle, a few select teachers, an artist, and a dog. When I think of these individuals, there is something specific to each of them that I’ve carried with me, sometimes literally. In an elementary school class, we painted stones into ladybugs, and I currently have mine on my work desk. I’ve somehow carried it with me over several decades now, from my original home to college, apartments, and a couple houses. It’s a symbol of a nurturing teacher and the creative inspiration I felt during my time with her.

There can be lots of different reasons why we might consider someone to be one of our unicorn people. It could be a sense of unconditional love they provide or encouragement for the development of our passions. Maybe they’ve inspired the direction of our goals and aspirations, or perhaps they’ve provided an example for who we want to be.

Artist Frida Kahlo is someone who’s been an inspiration to me for various reasons, even though she lived before my time. Some of this comes from her creativity. She also had a confidence that I admire, dressing her hair with flowers and adorning herself almost to the level of costume for the love of it. She didn’t seem to care what others might think, while I’m someone who tends to care far too much. At times I’ve let this hold me back and have definitely tried to blend in and go unnoticed. Frida reminds me to express my true self without apology. I need to stand up and sing, pick up a brush and paint in my own unique way, write the things that are asking to spill out of me, and share my creativity with others. This isn’t a recipe for blending in, and Frida has become my inspiration to stand in all my unique and creative beauty.

Additionally, Frida and my Great-Uncle Stanley are both individuals who lived with chronic conditions. Even with the difficulties they faced, they still lived vibrantly. While we all face challenges, I find a high level of inspiration in these two people because their shadow experiences of dealing with longtime health conditions are something I can intimately relate to.

I find strength in the memory of Stanley’s grand smile that shone like sunshine and lit up my heart. As a young child, I never really considered his paralyzed state to be something that challenged him. In fact, it became just another piece of his playfulness. He’d sit Amy and me on his lap and drive us around on his electric wheelchair, laughing right along with us. Frida found respite in her painting and achieved her dreams despite great pain and confinement. They both give me faith that despite the burden, I can do it too.

exercise 7

Find Your Unicorn People

Think of who your unicorn people are. These will be those who have helped you work through your challenges. Who do you look up to and find inspiration in? At first it might be difficult to think of who these individuals are. For some reason, I had a huge mental block around this. (We are searching for unicorns after all.) It wasn’t until I spent time meditating on it that I was finally able to identify who these individuals are for me.

Take a quiet moment and ponder your life challenges, obstacles, goals, and inspirations. Feel the emotions that come up for you and follow them. Think about the people who have soothed your pain or helped you find solutions to your problems or those who have consistently supported your dreams, even in subtle ways. Your memories might take you back to a certain age or moment in time. Sit in the moment and feel the space.

Pay attention to whether there is anyone else in this space with you. If there is, they may be someone who had significance during that phase of your life. Multiple memories might surface that are trying to show you a pattern. Each memory might reveal a similar feeling or issue that your unicorn person has helped you with. Again, try to pay attention to the emotions that come with it. Just like when you’re trying to think of something and it’s on the tip of your tongue, you might tune into the feeling and see if that leads you to whatever it is you are trying to recall. Our emotions can be a very helpful guide in this way.

You can also look to the things you’ve carried with you in your environment. Like my painted ladybug rock, you likely have something that, for whatever reason, you’ve chosen to keep with you over the years. Think of who else was connected to this item. Were they significant to you in some way?

If you’re still having a hard time thinking of who your unicorn people are, don’t worry. They might be so “everyday” present to you that you don’t even realize they are so significant. Many of mine came as a surprise. I didn’t recognize them right away, but they kept tapping on my door and rising to the surface in my thoughts. This happened with such regularity that eventually I realized their significance. You’ve opened the door for the answer to eventually come to you. Return to this exercise every so often and see if new information is waiting to be known.

Clarifying who our unicorn people are helps us in several ways. First, we can acknowledge and honor the good energy they’ve provided to us. It’s a bit like the question “If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it, does it make a sound?” If you don’t acknowledge that someone made a difference in your life, it’s harder to recognize the impact they made. Your acknowledgment sends a message to yourself that yes, this really happened, and yes, it made a difference in your life.

With this acknowledgment, it then becomes easier to realize the various ways your unicorn people have influenced you. And from those influences you can sometimes glean even more information about your needs, values, passions, and goals. Acknowledging the influence of others becomes a mirror by which you begin to more clearly see your authentic unicorn self as well.

When a Unicorn Turns Out to Be a Rhino

We also need to be aware that sometimes our inspirations fall short when we come face to face with what they truly are. Seeing behind a false representation that we thought was authentic can be really disheartening. It can lead to feelings of anger, betrayal, and even grief over the loss of something we found support and inspiration from. We thought we knew someone. We were inspired and energized by what they represented to us. When we realize that our vision wasn’t accurate, the feeling of disappointment and disillusionment can be harsh.

These moments can be a call to find the hero-self. We often look for what we need outside of ourselves. Here we’re reminded to look within and be our own hero instead.

exercise 8

Acknowledging the Unicorn
and the Rhino

Think of the people you’ve looked up to in your life. Write down those who have proven to be a true unicorn for you, remaining authentic to who you always envisioned they were. List the things that they’ve taught you and how they’ve helped you be the best version of yourself. Take a moment and reach out to these individuals if you’re able to get in touch with them. Let them know what an inspiration they’ve been to you.

For those who have ended up being false unicorns, think of the energy that initially drew you to them. What did you feel? What did you love about them and why? Now think of whatever made you realize they were actually a rhino. Maybe it was certain values or actions that didn’t feel in alignment with your own energy.

Now consider this: What could this individual have done that would have kept you feeling inspired by them? Take that information and flip the mirror onto yourself. Write down how you can take this newfound knowledge and embrace it in a way that makes you the unicorn. This is your takeaway and guide to how you can begin to represent a higher vibration for others.

Short-Burst Unicorns: People Who Offer
Acts of Kindness at Just the Right Time

Short-burst unicorns are those who appear in moments of need, providing acts of kindness at just the right time. Maybe it was someone who was there to help you change a flat tire when you were stranded, a nurse who assisted you at a difficult time, or someone who randomly passed along a book with a message that you really needed at that moment. There are so many possibilities for amazing moments from single and fleeting connections.

For me, one example came about after a surgery. I had a volunteer come in to visit me for a short while. I was uncomfortable, foggy from drugs, and trying to wrap my head around the frustrating diagnosis of a disease that I knew didn’t have a known cure. She walked in with a smile and asked if she could offer me an energy healing session. After I accepted she asked, “Is it okay if I use some essential oils? I have this blend with me today.” She pulled out a green bottle and my husband started laughing. “That’s her favorite!” Luke exclaimed.

A grin spread across my face. Even in all my discomfort, happiness burst through. It was indeed an oil that I adore. It always reminds me of gum I chewed as a kid and leaves me feeling in high spirits. It also always makes my mouth water, which I find funny. I could have doused myself in the whole bottle.

She proceeded to rub my feet with the oil and followed up with some energy work. By the end, I felt soothed, supported, and loved. It was exactly what I needed in that moment. I’d wanted to follow up with her and send a thank-you card, but I was never able to figure out exactly who it was that dropped in.

That’s what short-burst unicorns are about. They drop a little kindness right where you most need it and go on their way. They remind us that we’re worthy of the love we desire and inspire us to remind others of the same.

In this chapter, we’ve looked at tools of vision and reflection through which unicorn energy works its magic in an attempt to reach us: reflection, imagination, beauty, dreams, passions, personal quirks, and our unicorn people. In the next section, we’ll get into even more tools that focus on the magic of color.

unicorn

[contents]