Trust God to Change Other People

“Trust the past to God’s mercy, the present to God’s love and the future to God’s providence.”

—ST. AUGUSTINE

O taste and see that the Lord [our God] is good! Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) is the man who trusts and takes refuge in Him.

—Psalm 34:8

One of the biggest mistakes we make in relationships is when we try to make people be what we think they ought to be. Often we try to get them to be and think like us, but when we do that, we fail to realize God creates all of us very differently.

Ever notice how many of us are drawn to someone who is the opposite of us for a marriage partner or even a friend? Why is that? Because that person has what we are missing and we are attracted to it without even realizing it. This can be absolutely wonderful until we forget what attracted us to them in the beginning and we begin trying to change them to be more like us. Only God can change people and even He cannot change people if they are not willing to change.

Instead of “working on people,” we should pray for them that they would be open to change and allow God to work in their lives. When we pray for others to change, we need to do so with a lot of humility, still keeping in mind we have faults of our own.

I can remember when Dave and I stood in a room and shook hands, making a commitment to accept and love each other “as is,” faults and all. We had both been so busy trying to change the other, but the result was that neither of us was enjoying being together. From that day forward, things got better. We have to renew our commitment quite often, because it is easy to “fall off the wagon” and start trying to control again. But we do know without a doubt it is not our job to change each other. If you want to simplify your life, pray for the people in your life and let God be God!