Don’t Have a False Sense of Responsibility

“We are all something, but none of us are everything.”

—BLAISE PASCAL

My defense and shield depend on God, Who saves the upright in heart.

—Psalm 7:10

I have always been a very responsible person, so irresponsible people tend to irritate me. In the past, I frequently resented being responsible for what irresponsible people did not do, until God helped me realize I actually had a false sense of responsibility. A lot of what I did was not necessary. Perhaps some of you have the same dilemma.

Do you automatically step up to the plate and do whatever needs to be done, and then feel sorry for yourself because you have to do everything? You can be forever frustrated or you can make a decision to change. You may have been hurt or disappointed by someone who ignored their responsibility and now feel the only way to avoid more pain is to just do everything yourself. However, experience has taught me such reasoning only amplifies the problem. You may even be feeding irresponsibility in someone else by doing what they desperately need to learn to do themselves.

Far too often people don’t do what they should, and then when they are in trouble they expect someone else to pay the price to get them out of it. When we love people, we want to help them, but there are times when tough love helps them more than emotional love. Just doing someone else’s job feeds a lazy, immature, irresponsible attitude. Why not try letting them know that if they don’t take care of business, they will pay the price, not you. Make sure you stick to your word.

I find if someone I depend on forgets something a couple of times then it’s natural for me to just do it myself. It takes less time than making sure they do it. But what I have learned to do is make them take their responsibility and if they won’t, I have to get someone who will. I don’t like to hurt people, which is a good quality, but it can also become a problem if not kept in balance. We are not wise if we destroy our own lives trying to fix everyone else’s.

I have often had a tendency to do things myself to make sure they are done the way I wanted. God taught me that a humble person realizes their way is not the only way and that allowing others to do things their way gives them room to be themselves. Your spouse doesn’t put dishes away the same way as you, but the dishes still get put away. As long as the job gets done, does it really matter if it is done differently than you would do it?

If you find your life is complicated, try simplifying it by always doing your responsibility, but never doing someone else’s unless it’s an emergency. Start today and take an honest look at whether or not you really have to do all the things you are doing!