| |
Dante
––––––––
My bladder nudges me awake. I take a deep breath only to wince. Every muscle in my body hurts like a motherfucker. My lungs suck in air fast as I move off the bed. Sonofabitch, inhaling has my core muscles screaming in agony. Moving slowly, I get to the bathroom and relieve my bladder. Done, I lean carefully over the jacuzzi tub and turn on my saved setting. As the water fills I hunt down some over the counter pain meds, knowing the tub will help but I need more.
It’s been a long time since I worked out so hard. No matter how many times I beat off, my cock stayed hard for her. I spent over two hours working out until I could barely stand, yet when I tried to sleep I couldn’t. After an hour of tossing and turning I gave in to my need, but even when my cock was satisfied I couldn’t sleep. It took another hour in the gym until pain sent me back to bed, where I finally collapsed into sleep.
Really? I’m hard all over again at the thought of her? This is some bullshit because I’m seriously pissed at her. The way she taunted me with the idea of her fucking someone else, of her allowing another man inside her when she wanted me. It pushed me right over the edge, I understood for a split second how people went off the rails and spilled blood over a lover. No one else is going to touch her. Bethany is mine.
I can admit it now: something happened the moment I laid eyes on Bethany. All the lethargy, the angst, all the gray of the last year disappeared. I blinked and everything became vibrant, glowing; even the air felt alive and new. I blinked again and it was only the two of us. Nothing else existed or mattered but her and me. Until she threw the coffee in my face. Then I remembered she’s my sister-in-law’s little sister, Che wants us to be one big happy family, and the longest relationship I’ve had lasted six months.
Last night, though, none of that shit mattered anymore. With the smell of Bethany’s pussy soaking wet for me, and her pleading, offering herself to me, all the chains I’ve been keeping locked on my desire broke. If I haven’t managed to scare her away this is happening, we are happening. Only, not yet. As much as it makes my cock ache to wait for her, I need to ease her into the shallow end of the pool first.
***
Dante
––––––––
I’m not surprised to find Che waiting for me in my office. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing? Bethany is too young and too damn innocent for you.”
At least I make it to my desk without him taking a punch at me. “You aren’t saying anything I didn’t. I argued with her, but she was adamant I’m what she wants. I tried, but I want her too and I’m not going to fight it anymore.”
“Anymore? You’ve known her for a week.”
I wince—he’s honed in on the one thing still filling me with doubt. It does feel like too much too fast. I also know nothing has ever felt so right. “How long did it take you to know with Alicia?”
Shit, I didn’t mean to say that. “What are you saying, Dante?”
Even though I am dying to know when he knew, how he knew, I shake my head. “I don’t know. Forget it. You’re right, this is fast, a few times I thought the same thing. I also know it feels right. It’s almost like I don’t have a choice. Or if I do, it’s between Bethany and back to being miserable again.”
“So it was her, this change in you. You smiling again, those lines gone from your forehead. It’s because of her.”
It’s not really a question, but I nod anyway. “All her.”
He sighs as he gets up then runs a hand through his hair. “When you hurt her—”
“Jesus, Che, I’d rather cut myself than hurt her. Don’t say shit like that.” Why does he have to say it like it’s a foregone conclusion?
Our eyes meet, and he nods. “All right. It’s not like I have a choice anyway. But I’ll support you the way Alicia asked me to.”
God, I love Alicia. “Thanks.”
He shrugs. “Lunch at one?”
Che said his piece. It’s done. “Works for me.”
“See you then.”
When he leaves I exhale, releasing tension I had no idea I was holding. I wouldn’t have been able to walk away from Bethany even if Che told me to, but I’m glad he didn’t.
***
Bethany
––––––––
My eyes flick down to the time in the corner of my laptop. It’s only three minutes later than the last time I checked. Oh my god, this day is taking forever. The guy in the video says a word that sounds like attention and I click out of it. I’m not paying attention. I’ve watched this thing almost fifteen times now. It’s the least annoying video and it’s laid out easier to follow than many of the others. I’m actually feeling a little confident.
I dunk my teabag again before I take another sip. This damn tea is making me jittery. I thought green tea was all calming and healthy. Right now I feel like I could run a marathon, or at least get dressed and leave the house, on one cup. Not even espresso does that for me. My phone rings, and I get way too excited, then let down, it’s Alicia.
“Ciao.” Alicia giggles then responds in a flood of Italian. “Okay, okay, you know I didn’t understand a word you said, showoff.”
“I’m happy you’re trying. You want me to dig out my tutor’s number? I liked her, she was nice and patient.”
“Not yet, maybe after another forty hours of the videos then I might ask you for it. What’s up, chica?”
“I talked to Cesare. Good news: no bones are going to break. Cesare is going to be a good, supportive big brother. Until Dante makes you cry, then Cesare will break something.”
I roll my eyes. “He’s so sweet. You know it’s a breath of fresh air to encounter Neanderthals after everyone was certain they disappeared.”
Her laughter is loud. “Dante is only a tiny bit better, so don’t think you’re safe.”
“Yes, yes, I’m aware. About that...” God this is embarrassing. I’m not even sure how to ask the question. Talk about TMI.
“What?”
“Is it weird or bad I like, um... I like, oh crap. Shouldn’t it not be a turn-on when Dante gets all rough and aggressive and threatens to spank me?” Oh shit, I did not mean to say the last bit. Kill me now. “Strike that last thing from the record. Council will forget I ever said it.” Alicia is laughing way too damn hard. “Alicia, this is a serious question here. I’m supposed to be a feminist. Does this mean I’m not?”
“Okay, okay, sorry. I’m going to tell you what Cesare told me: don’t ever let anyone make you feel ashamed about what turns you on. As long as it’s between consenting adults. Whatever it is, it only matters if it’s what you both want and are happy with.
“There’s a whole community geared toward people looking to be dominated because it turns them on. I also love it when Cesare gets all...you know. I’m going to say without any shame, I love being spanked. Sadly it doesn’t happen often enough because Cesare hates it when he manages to leave bruises even though I ask for it. Don’t be afraid to set boundaries or call him on it if he oversteps, or even better, to ask for what you want. I’m no expert on Dante in the bedroom, but at work he made sure I never felt uncomfortable. I can’t imagine he would be different with you.”
Relief has me sagging into my chair. “Thank goodness. I was a little worried. I almost went looking through the internet for the answer but I didn’t want to pick up any viruses, if you know what I mean.”
“It’s funny to me you would even ask the question. It always seems like you don’t give a fuck what people think. I’m surprised this would be any different.”
“I don’t care what other people think. I worried I was, I don’t know, betraying the whole we demand to be treated with respect and a relationship to be fair and equal thing.”
“Oh, sweetie, you are adorable. No relationship is fair and equal all the time. Maybe ten percent of the time the scale is balanced, the other times it’s a whole lot of give and a whole lot of take. Sometimes I do more giving with Matteo, but Cesare does more giving with his time. Sometimes I do way more taking of Cesare’s willingness to coddle me, and other times he does more taking in needing to make love, because it’s his way of being coddled.
“At the end of the day it’s not about who takes or gives more, it’s about whether or not you can bear the unevenness, if the good outweighs the bad. The balance is constantly shifting. As long as you two communicate what you need, what’s really important, and if the other hears it and honors it in a respectful way, for the most part you won’t feel like killing each other. Remember, when a person is murdered police look at the spouse. There’s a reason.”
“It sounds overwhelming. I really need to look into this whole relationship thing more. I thought it was all Netflix and chill and arguing over having pizza or Chinese for takeout. Then again, Dante doesn’t do Chinese because of the carbs and salt. This sounds hard.”
“It can be, and then sometimes it’s sweet and effortless. I do think it shouldn’t be hard all the time. If it’s constant work and stress, then there’s something wrong on a fundamental level, and the relationship won’t work in the long run. It’s not up to him to make you happy or vice versa, but it is up to you to respect him and your relationship. I found a book I really like. It lays it out simply. I’ll email it to you.”
“Great, now I’m studying to be in a relationship.”
She sighs. “No one says you have to read it.”
“No, send it to me. I want to read it. Just me whining about anything being harder than I think it should be.”
“Welcome to the real world. Buckle up, buttercup, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.”
“Haha, you’re mean.” I hear a beep.
“I have to go, it’s Meredith calling me to update on her mom. Love you, talk later.”
I’m looking through an online bookstore for books on relationships—damn it’s overwhelming—when my phone rings. It’s the pharmacy. Thank goodness, my doctor in Iowa was willing to refill the birth control prescription I hadn’t filled in almost two years. I hadn’t felt the need to as, hello, no sex. The only reason my doctor put me on it was because I had a cyst burst, leaving me incapacitated for two days. After the emergency room physician gave me a shot of morphine for the pain, he urged me to follow up with my doctor to go on the pill. He ruled out polycystic ovary syndrome but going on the pill would likely prevent future cysts.
I made the call, did some of my own research and agreed with him. My doctor did too. I took it for a year, only I wasn’t the best at taking it on time and after the prescription ran out I thought it was more trouble than it was worth to get another. Since I had a Pap six months ago, my doctor is willing to do the refill.
I decide to go pick it up myself. It’s only two blocks away, and I’m still feeling hyped up from the tea.
While I’m out I manage to get pulled into a bookstore by an invisible forcefield. Almost two hours later I walk out with more books than I can read for the rest of the year, three of them on relationships, one of them the one Alicia recommended. I even went into the romance section, which I never do. I know Alicia reads romance, but none of the stories ever sucked me in the way thrillers and mystery do. With romance it’s all the same, boy meets girl, they fall in love, one of them is stupid or does something stupid, they break up only to realize they loved each other all along, and then boom, the end. With mysteries and thrillers there’s a kind of pattern but anyone could be the bad guy, bad people did horrible things and sometimes the good guy did even worse things. That’s interesting, that’s compelling. But I got curious at the display of the best romances of the year so far. I don’t think it would hurt to try a few out.
When I get back to the condo it’s almost five o’clock and my agitation begins building. What did last night mean? Before he walked away I would have sworn he was giving in, but then he walked away. Talk about mixed signals. I’m wondering if I should call Lydia and ask her when my phone buzzes with a text. It’s Dante.
––––––––
Dinner?
––––––––
Oh thank god. I don’t hesitate to call him. “Now?”
“I have a few things to wrap up still, another hour or so. Enzo has me on ice. Why don’t you meet me at Porters?”
I bite my lip to keep from squealing like an idiot. “Can’t we eat in? I’ll cook, I’m not bad at it. I’m not great but I’m like a solid four stars on five things and a three on most others.”
“I’m leaning toward making you get dressed in clothes that don’t cling to you when you’re close enough for me to touch.”
Eager to please, I give in. “Okay, I’ll go. I don’t have a lot of nice clothes.”
“Don’t worry, something like what you wore yesterday is fine.”
“If you say so. What time?”
“Seven okay?”
“See you then.”
I wander into my closet, desperate to find something nice to wear. It takes way too long to come up with a simple black maxi skirt and pink top. Then I worry the sleeves are too short and grab a cardigan to go over it.
I make it to the restaurant with a few minutes to spare to find Dante already there. Heat flares low inside me as his eyes run over me.
His hand goes to the small of my back as he guides me toward our table. Even through my clothes the heat of his touch sparks fizzy bubbles in my blood. I fight not to lean into his touch.
It’s fairly busy for a Monday night, but our table is toward the back where it’s quiet. “This place is nice without being overwhelming. I like it. What’s good here?”
“Everything, especially the chocolate souffle.”
The waitress is maybe a little too happy to see Dante as she takes our drink order. An Italian raspberry soda for me and a sparkling water for Dante.
Once we order, with Dante including a chocolate souffle, I try not to fidget with my silverware. I look up to find chocolate brown eyes on me.
“What?”
“You had me going there. I was sure you were never nervous.”
I roll my eyes. “Considering I never know where I stand with you from one moment to the next, I think it would be stupid for me not to be nervous.”
Ah, those dimples are killer and he knows it. “Honestly, I didn’t know where I stood either. I’ve never been one to deny what I wanted, never had to before. I’m no saint, but I believed I was doing the right thing by trying to stay away from you. Only I get it now—whether we give in to this or not, there’s no walking away like it never happened, for either of us.”
“Finally. I thought you were trying to make me crazy.”
His laugh is soft and flutters up my tummy. “Same.”
“How mad is Enzo?”
“Don’t worry about Enzo, or Che. I’ve been given my warning and I’ll deal with the consequences later.”
“I don’t like the idea of you guys fighting.” They are so close, I would never want to be the cause of hurting their relationship.
He shrugs. “Really, don’t worry. That’s what comes with being close, we argue, we fight, we might even throw a punch, but it’s all done in love and in the end we mean more to each other than being right or some other bullshit.”
“I’m relieved to hear it. Funny, Alicia said something like that, about being right not being more important than the other person.”
“It’s true. There’s two sides to every story, and then there’s what really happened. I don’t think it’s a good idea to give or take too much, but it doesn’t do any good to keep a count because it’s never going to be even and if that’s your focus, then you lose before you even start.”
Our plates arrive and like before there’s no need for talking as we eat. Once again it’s a comfortable silence without any pressure to fill the quiet.
Until the souffle is brought out, my eyes go big.
Dante laughs. “You know you’re helping me with this, right? I can’t eat this alone. There’s two spoons for a reason.”
“Oh, it is kind of big.” Holy crap I’m in love. “So good.”
“Told you.”
We make quick work of it. Once it’s gone we lean back with satisfied sighs.
“This was yummy, thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Thank you for not wearing anything tight.”
“I did promise.”
We’re out on the street where the sun is setting, turning the sky pink. Dante hails a cab and in only ten minutes we’re walking into the elevator.
“Interesting how you go all shy now.” It’s so hard not to blush, I give up. A big hand goes around my wrist, tugging me to him. I don’t hesitate, greedy for the feel of him against me again. The doors open and I’m being guided out of the elevator with his body. I have no memory of making it inside Cesare’s condo when Dante lifts me, then sets me on the edge of the waist height, large round marble table in the foyer. I shiver from the cool surface of the marble. Without thought my legs go wide for him to fit between them, and he presses into the heart of me. Holy crap, he’s so freaking hard, my body floods, desperate for him. He moans. “I can smell your pussy, wet for me. Show me your pussy.”
I sway as he steps away from me. A hand goes behind me to hold me up. I blink, trying to understand the words, then blush. He’s so dirty. A dark eyebrow goes up. I don’t even hesitate—I can’t deny him anything. My legs are still wide where he left them. I pull the skirt up; thankfully it has enough give to come up over the top of my thighs. As I watch him, heat flares low in my tummy. His jaw clenches, his breathing grows heavy. I’m not ashamed of the wet line against the panties where I can feel moisture seep from me. Dark eyes, molten with desire, flick up to meet mine. “I want to see all of you.”
With a smile I lean back on both hands. “I’m pretty sure I’ll fall if I try to take my panties off. If you want to see me, you take them off.”
Dante’s hands go down on my thighs, pushing the skirt further up until I’m on full display. His touch is a match to gasoline, sending my whole body up in flames. Then his fingers tuck under the band of my panties, and slowly, so slowly, he draws them down. I try to help but I’m a quivering puddle of need; I’m not even sure how I’m still upright. My ass is on the edge of the table, my legs wide again without even remembering I did it.
Dante groans from deep in his chest. “Bare, I was not expecting this.” The words are hoarse as I watch his throat work to swallow. As he reaches out to touch me, I close my eyes tight. A thick finger slides over the seam of me, gliding in the wetness there. “The better to see you. You have the prettiest pussy I have ever seen. Sweet swollen lips, softer than silk, all pink and wet for me.”
His finger slides all the way down then pushes lightly inside me before sliding back up. I can only watch with wide eyes as he puts his finger to his mouth then sucks on it. “You taste even better than you look, sweet as sugar.”
One step and he’s back between my legs. A large hand is at the nape of my neck, drawing me up to him. My eyes are beginning to burn, but I can’t blink for fear of missing a second. Slowly he draws me closer; gently his lips brush against mine, so damn lightly if it weren’t for the tingle where they met, I would doubt it happened. Another soft brush, and my mouth comes open to demand more, but his mouth is already there. His velvet tongue scorches everything it touches, deeper and deeper, tasting every inch of me, owning every inch of me. Greedy, ravenous, we’re clinging to each other, more, deeper, please. Dante tears his mouth from mine, and I can’t contain the inarticulate cry of pain at the sudden loss of him.
Italian in liquid form is pouring from him as he kisses his way along my neck. “English,” I moan.
Hot air rushes over my ear. “I knew the minute I touched you I would lose all control. You drive me mad with need.”
I open my mouth to argue, only the feel of his finger slipping inside me, has my head going back. My hips lift up to meet his touch, enticing him to go deeper. Another finger, oh, they push deep inside me. I want to scream at the gentle, slow exploration. Then Dante’s lips are on my ear, his tongue tracing the shape. “Slick, soft, such a perfect welcome your pussy is giving me. Will you welcome my cock the same way?”
Those fingers push deeper inside, forcing a moan from me. I had no idea I was so tight. I’ve used a vibrator once or twice a month, shouldn’t—my brain sizzles, goes completely blank as his fingers move inside me. Only his touch matters. “Tight. Don’t worry, I’ll fit. You’re mine, you were made for me,” he promises huskily. I moan, wanting to beg for more. “All right, it’s all right. I know, me too.”
His mouth is back on mine, his fingers move again. I nearly scream as they graze my clit. Holy fuck, I didn’t realize my clit was so damn swollen. Dante laughs, his mouth still on mine. His tongue is teasing me, stroking, licking slow and deep. Those fingers circle me, again and again until my hips move, greedy for more. No more teasing; gently, but with firm pressure, those fingers move on my clit over and over until I’m screaming as my whole body shakes, oh god, oh god. I can’t, please stop, please, it’s too much. I blink and the world goes black.
What? I come awake to Dante pulling my shirt over my head. I’m lying in bed. What the hell? No way did an orgasm knock me out. I don’t believe it. Except even now my whole body feels boneless and weak and I can’t remember anything.
His eyes are soft, a delicious chocolate brown. “Sorry, I got a little carried away. You were so gorgeous with your body shaking in my arms, I wanted to see it all over again.”
He begins to get up. I catch his hand. “Come to bed.”
Shaking his head, he leans down to press a kiss to my mouth. It’s too damn quick. “I can’t, not tonight. Patience, Bethany, we’re easing into the deep end. I promise, this will be worth the wait.”
Then the fucker gets up and walks away. I swear the man is driving me crazy.
***
Dante
––––––––
I’m undressing as I move through my place. I’m sweating from the heat rushing through my body even now, almost twenty minutes after Bethany came apart in my arms with my name on her lips. I squeeze my eyes tight but I see it, feel her soft body shaking against mine. Christ, I have no idea how I stayed on my feet. Only I didn’t dare move; if I had I would have taken her then and there, and I would have been a savage. I was surprised when she fainted, but relieved, it gave time for the tension to ease inside me.
For a long time, I simply held her, staring down at her, committing every inch of her to memory. Bethany awake is vibrantly stunning, her big hazel eyes zipping from green to golden brown and back again, a dozen muscles in her face moving, her smile sweet in one moment, impish the next. Yet when she’s asleep, her whole body relaxed, her beauty is peaceful, soothing something inside me I didn’t know needed to be soothed. I could have held her there for hours, except she shivered. And I realized she was half-naked on a marble table. Great, a real gentleman, Dante.
Picking her up and carrying her to her room, her precious weight in my arms was heaven, my woman in my arms where she belongs. Soon, I’ll be carrying her to our room and I won’t be leaving her. I hated the trace of sadness in her eyes as I left. I knew it was the right thing to do, but that didn’t mean it was easy. It wasn’t, not when it felt like I was leaving my whole world behind me.
A flick of my wrists and the water in the shower is nearly scalding. I’ll take it—anything to ease the tension in my body. I soap up and in seconds my hand is around my cock where I want Bethany’s pussy to be. Fuck, sweet like candy, a lollipop I could suck on for hours. I can’t wait to have her pussy under my mouth, sucking on her juice. I come hard, my cock quivering yet still hard. Damn it, this is going to be a long night.
––––––––
I want to sleep, I’m exhausted, only I can’t. Normally, I would be thinking about what Enzo said. Only I couldn’t care less. His warnings of pending disaster and how I was taking advantage of a vulnerable young woman had me fighting laughter at the time. Bethany is young—damn, sometimes I wish she wasn’t—but she’s not vulnerable, allowing anyone in in order to have someone. She isn’t weak and looking for someone stronger. Maybe a part of it is her youth, she hasn’t been broken by a man or the world and is willing to take a chance on me, on us, because experience hasn’t made her wary and cautious. I don’t know, I don’t care. I feel down to my bones that this is right for the both of us. Even if I weren’t already in complete and utter lust with her body, mind, and her wicked tongue.
I grab my phone and check the display. It’s a little after twelve thirty. I type fast.
––––––––
Thinking about me?
––––––––
My phone rings, and I smile.
She’s talking before I even have the phone to my ear. “I am not thinking about you. I’m wondering if someone was killed in this house and that’s why it’s so cheap. I’m wondering if I would still buy it if I found out someone was killed in it. I’m also wondering if it’s haunted, and if it is haunted, is it like a prankster who opens doors and knocks on walls, or if it’s super evil and will give me bad dreams that send me screaming into the night wearing nothing but panties and a shirt. So there.” I can barely breathe I’m laughing so hard. “Okay, okay, I was wondering if I showed up on your door crying from a scary ghost if you’d let me spend the night.”
I’m not going to address the fact she isn’t moving anywhere, we’ll argue later. “Why would you wonder if you would get to spend the night? Of course you would.”
“Hmm... in your condo, or in the one downstairs somewhere in this building?” Why am I not surprised she knows about my other condo? “Yes, when I spent the Thanksgiving weekend there, I snooped unrepentantly. I was surprised there wasn’t a single sign of a woman ever being in the place. When I mentioned it to Claudine, she said you never allowed women to come to your place. She mentioned another, smaller condo somewhere in this building that you own and where you take women.”
“True. I didn’t want a woman in my home. I value my privacy. There was no one I wanted around for longer than it took for me to feed them and fuck them. Considering I get antsy when you’re out of my sight longer than twenty minutes, and even after spending all day with you I hated walking away from you tonight, it’s a guarantee you’ll be here in my bed. I’m looking forward to it.”
“Ah, I’m such a lucky woman.”
“You’re a smart-ass is more like. There’s just one thing: I’m not going to assume I know how you feel, but I do want you to stop comparing yourself to women in my past. They are in the past for a reason. I can’t change the things I’ve done; I’m not saying I would even if I could. I promise you, I don’t think of them, I’m not comparing you to them. I’ve never done it before, and I’m not going to start. This right now, you and me. This is all that matters.”
I swear I can feel her smiling through the phone. “Yes, Dante. Whatever you say, Dante.”
“I should have recorded you to play it back later. I’m pretty sure you’ll never say it again.”
“You know me so well.” Her yawn is quick—she’s trying to hide it.
“Go to sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow. I have a feeling I won’t be having dinner with Enzo. I’ll be home around five thirty.”
“Sounds good. Night, Dante.”
“Night.” This time when I close my eyes, sleep envelops me completely.