ENTWINE
There are really only six basic sex positions. It’s true—all of the amazing and delightful things two bodies can do together are simply creative variations on one of the following: missionary, woman on top, spooning, doggie, sitting, or standing. Most people have a couple of favorites—those two or three things you know always work to get you excited, build connection, or get you there. But there are so many possibilities for mixing it up. Sometimes it’s as easy as wrapping a leg or moving your hands in a different way—small changes that make a spine-tingling difference. Sometimes, it’s all about location. You can make your home into your own sexy gymnasium, and try out new things in the bedroom or the shower, on the stairs, or all over your sofa. Remember, you don’t have to do positions in any set order. You can combine the positions in this book in new ways, or create your own. Flip through these pages and see which ideas grab you—and then grab your partner and go with what feels right, exciting, challenging, and fun.
Having sex standing up conveys desire at its strongest: wanting your partner so intensely that the two of you can’t even make it to the couch or bedroom.
Nothing says, “I need to have you now” like doing it standing up. More than any other position, it expresses a powerful urgency, especially if you don’t even take the time to get fully undressed.
Standing positions involve a unique set of challenges, including differing partner height, strength, balance, and coordination. Sound difficult? You don’t have to make this a freestanding event. Lean on your lover for support or against a handy wall. In a more narrow door frame, you can both brace your arms and legs in interesting ways. Do be careful with your movements—a slip can end up bending him in ways that are just no fun.
It might take a little experimentation, but if you adjust as you go, it’ll all work out. Start out with her spreading her legs, bending her knees, and facing forward or backward. He can also lift her up against the wall, with both her legs wrapped around his waist. Or she can try standing on one leg while wrapping her other leg around him. That’s a classic standing position—and for good reason.
The coital alignment technique (CAT) has helped lots of women reach orgasm during intercourse. To try it, start in a traditional missionary position. The man enters her, then slides his pelvis a few inches higher than usual. His body is flat against hers, and her legs wrap around him. Think pelvis-to-pelvis rather than in and out—the motion is an up-and-down, steady rocking with a focus on where her clitoris hits the base of the man’s penis. She can rotate her hips to increase friction or to keep it going while he holds still for a while.
Use hands to touch his chest, waist, and buttocks.
Scent is a powerful turn-on, so breathe deeply as you make love.
Suck, bite, or lick her lips as you move your bodies together.
The man-on-top position has a reputation for being less exciting—but that’s only if it’s the only way you do it every time you do it.
There are plenty of spicy variations on the missionary theme. Make it your mission to try out a few. For instance, raising a woman’s legs will increase the intensity of the man’s thrusts. Or she can squeeze her legs together, which keeps him from thrusting too deeply and makes everything down there feel tighter. When he holds her ankles, it adds an element of power play.
Each of these positions can feel radically different with just slight adjustments of her legs—try them higher or lower, closer together or widely spread, and propped on one or both shoulders. Most missionary variations can be great if you’re having anal sex, too. If that’s the case, you’ll get a better angle if you place a pillow under her butt.
1 Crossed legs and clenched thigh muscles may be all the clitoral stimulation she needs to orgasm.
2 Spread her legs apart for deeper penetration and a great visual.
3 Place her legs over one of your shoulders to hit new angles inside of her. Also try switching shoulders.
4 Bring her knees down around your waist for a slightly shallower thrust and a sense of connection.
A spooning session is as easy as waking up, rolling over, and getting it on. A man and woman just need to lie on their sides as he enters her from behind. This is a great option whether you’re sleepy, pregnant, or you’re just feeling cuddly. To take it up a notch, she can bend up her top knee, place her hand between her thighs, and fondle his testicles.
Spooning positions are great if she prefers shallow penetration, but you can take it deeper by transitioning to doggie-style. He can lift one of her legs and enjoy the spooning position for a while, and then, when both are ready, roll her over onto her belly or knees and continue.
Take the opportunity to focus on your connection, since you’re pressed together and the position doesn’t require much energy.
His hands are free to hold her close, stroke her breasts, belly, and hips, or play with her clitoris. She can touch herself, too.
“Woman on top is a win-win situation. She’s in control of the motion, intensity, and thrusting, and her partner gets to take in the whole picture. Men are intensely visual, and they’re getting the best seat in the house with this one.”
Jamye
“I don’t know much that’s sexier than a woman who knows what she wants and how to get it, and that’s what makes woman-on-top positions so hot. She gets to control everything from the angle to the orgasm.”
When a woman’s on top, she’s in charge of the action. And because the man has a limited range of motion, it may make the sexual encounter last longer. Giddyup!
At once passionate and personal, the cowgirl position is a popular favorite. To make it work for you, straddle your partner with your knees on either side of his hips. You can also squat over his body with your feet flat on the outer sides of his thighs. Either way, the key is to slowly lower yourself, and ease him inside.
If you’re both sitting up, you can press yourselves chest to chest and cheek to cheek. Intimate eye contact is almost unavoidable. While you’re gazing deeply, smile and wrap your hands around your partner’s body, or place them on the back of the chair, couch, or bed to use as leverage. Or lean away from him, arch your back, and give him a show.
You can ride your man all sorts of ways. Move up and down, rock back and forth, or grind your hips in a circle. Try squeezing your pelvic floor muscles, too. Some women feel self-conscious about being “on display” in this way, but trust us: your partner loves a sexy show. This position is also convenient—when she’s wearing a skirt, it can happen anywhere.
With a woman on top, she is definitely in charge—of her sensations as well as his. She can turn, arch, and lean, stimulating both partners in a variety of ways. She is free to experiment with different moves and rhythms. And when she’s found her favored groove, she can ride it all the way to ecstasy.
When he bends his knees, she can lean back for support. It also allows her to target the sensitive area around her G-spot.
Play with leg position to vary the penetration depth. This angle allows him to go deeper. Squeezing her thighs helps, too.
Reverse positions offer direct G-spot action. She can place her legs to the side and raise her body with her arms and knees.
When a woman leans forward on his knees, she gets comfort and control. And he gets a fantastic view of her back and butt.
REMEMBER TO PAUSE AND VISIT SOME UNEXPECTED SENSUAL DESTINATIONS.
1 ROAM THE TERRAIN Start at the wrists. Lick them. Breathe on them. Use your tongue to make slow circles up and down from hand to elbow. Spread the love by moving slowly up and down every inch of her body.
2 PULL HER IN CLOSE Next time you’re going in for a kiss, wrap your hands around her waist. Grab her butt. Press her body into yours. The more you touch her, the more excited she’ll get—and the more she’ll touch you.
3 BUILD EXCITEMENT Even though clitoral stimulation is the best way for most women to reach orgasm, take your time going there. Stroke her hips and inner thighs, then move slowly toward her mound and outer lips.
4 BREATHE EASY The nape of the neck is one of the sexiest go-to places on most bodies. Gently massage this area to release energy and to build sexual tension. Light kisses work well, as does a bit of up-close heavy breathing.
Trying a simple leg wrap can make missionary magical or take doggie-style to the next level. It also makes direct clitoral contact easier, since moving the leg allows for a new angle of access. Try a variation with both legs: before he enters her from behind, she wraps her legs around his body so that her feet are at his behind, drawing him inside.
Open up your spooning style. With her leg wrapped around his thigh, there’s more room for hands-on clitoral stimulation.
With her top leg extended straight out and his top knee bent, he can use his thigh to directly massage her clitoris.
“Getting in touch with what you want and need in the moment can be a real turn-on. The next step is expressing this to your partner. If you know what you want, just ask for it. Don’t worry. It gets easier with practice. Then be sure to listen to what your partner wants as well!”
While not every sex session absolutely has to end with an orgasm, it’s certainly a nice bit of punctuation for the end (and the middle, and sometimes the beginning). The big bang may occur as a result of penetration, but you might want to experiment with a range of other techniques to get there. You can explore vibrators, dildos, and other sex toys—but don’t forget your hands and even your feet. You can enhance your sex life and celebrate your connection with every part of your body—and then some.
1 Touching during sex isn’t always goal oriented. Sometimes a sweet caress makes the moment.
2 A vibrator can give her intense orgasms, while he gets to enjoy some secondhand tingles.
3 This position is less about thrusting and more about her doing a slow grind. It may be too subtle to get him there, but it’s a great stop along the way.
4 Instead of working with your hands, lube up those feet and stroke his shaft.
Sometimes, once we get hot and heavy, we forget that a gentle embrace or passionate kiss in the middle of wild sex can make everything feel more intense.
One of the deepest and most powerful connections is also one of the simplest—the kiss. So intensify your lovemaking with occasional or ongoing mini make-out sessions. Start slowly, then go deep. Nibble on the upper lip, then the lower one. Or just use your lips and tongue.
Try starting with your mouths barely open, lips soft and inviting. Then move to flicking tongues quickly into each other’s mouths, followed by full-on deep tongue kissing. Try sucking on your partner’s lips or tongue for some variety. You can also play with your breath. Suck some air from your partner’s mouth and then gently blow it back. As you kiss, cup your lover’s face, rub the back of the neck, or tug gently on a handful of their hair. Pull your partner in close, and kiss like you really mean it.
Slowly press your bodies together, letting the passion of your kiss guide your rhythm. There are so many ways to kiss, from the soft and tender to the downright animalistic. Try them all, and see what feels best to you.
YOUR TOUCH CAN BE TEASING OR FIRM—HE’LL LOVE IT WHEN YOU GET PRIMAL.
1 HEAD GAMES Draw him in close and nibble on his neck. Dig your nails into his back or massage his scalp. Whisper something devilish in his ear. If words get in the way, just use your tongue to flick and lick.
2 FINGER PLAY Use your hands (and mouth) to tantalize him. Massage his knuckles, lick along the crevices of his hands, and fool around with his fingers the same way you would with other erogenous zones.
3 TREASURE CHEST His chest is an often-overlooked hot spot, so surprise him with a sensual chest rub. Stroke the center of his chest, and gently tease around his nipples, working up to a few playful pinches.
4 REAR VIEW Stroke that tantalizing rear, then give it a good, firm grab and pull his body close to yours. Breathe on his neck and kiss his shoulders. You’re in charge here, so do it like you mean it. Give his butt a playful slap.
Why do we love doggie-style sex? Well, for starters, it offers the deepest penetration, leaves his hands free to roam over her body, and lets you enjoy that primal feeling of taking and being taken. For women, it can mean incredible G-spot stimulation. And many men enjoy the fact that it’s a supercomfortable and very visual position. Depending on your mood and preferences, you can get a little rough or keep things slow and sensual. Doggie is also a great position for anal sex. Whether you’re going anal or vaginal, she can use her arms to brace herself against the mattress or headboard, which facilitates deeper thrusts, or he could grab her wrists from behind, supporting her upper body, for a slightly kinky feel. For health and safety reasons, never go from anal to vaginal penetration without changing condoms.
This position puts pressure on knees and elbows, so choose a soft surface or pad with pillows. You can also experiment using pillows under her hips to vary the penetration angle and make things a little more cozy, comfortable, and relaxed.
1 When her thighs are pressed together, she feels tighter, and he doesn’t go in as deep.
2 For deeper penetration, she can hook heels over his shoulder and draw him in close with her feet.
3 If you’re rolling over between front and rear penetration, stop midway and explore the sideways sensation.
4 When she lowers her chest, arches her back, and moves her legs outside of his, he can get deeper.
{1} Start with her legs in between his, and experiment with how she raises and lowers the top half of her body. Try both bent and straight arms.
{2} He can use his hands to help with the motion. When he grabs her hips, he has more power to thrust. Or he can amplify her sensations by stroking her hair, breasts, or clitoris.
{3} If she’s got strong arms, he can sit back on his heels while lifting her knees and wrapping them around his body, as she slides back and forth on his body.
{4} When she’s this low, she can take a break while he does the work—or she can rock into his pelvis to increase the intensity.
“Sex is an adventure, and that means there isn’t always a clear course from one end to the other. Whether you’re keeping it simple or going for the gold, agree to veer off the beaten path every once in a while.”
Sex in one position is fun—but swiveling sex that hits all your hot spots is even better! Reverse cowgirl, with the woman on top facing his toes, is fantastic for women who like to manage the action and men who like to admire the view. She might slip a leg in between his, or rest her stomach on his thighs. When she lies down, he gets an arresting view, and she can move her clitoris against his testicles. Shift positions carefully to make sure that the angle is comfortable for him.
1 When she’s on top, she can watch him work it. Men are famously visual, but women love sexy sights, too.
2 He can bend his legs while she squats and rides —she can push off his thighs for powerful thrusts.
3 He can guide the motion when he grabs her hips and pulls her back and forth, or he can just caress her and relish the view.
4 Swiveling slowly around while still connected is a neat trick that feels great for both of you.
5 Once you get the rhythm, a 69 can double your oral pleasure. Try swapping who’s on top.
In a seated position like this one, she’s basically grinding onto his lap. If she has strong legs, she can enjoy adding a bit of up-and-down motion to the mix.
Some positions are all about thrusting. Others are subtler, and more about what’s happening inside. Sexercise helps you get the strongest fireworks from the still, slow, and sensual positions. Squeezing and releasing your pubococcygeus (PC) muscles can increase orgasmic potential for some men and women. To locate the muscles that we’re talking about, stop your flow of urine the next time you’re on the toilet. The same muscles that you use to control that movement are the ones to target. Practice squeezing and releasing them all throughout the day, and then try it in any sex position. This may help women experience stronger orgasms and aid men in learning to have multiple orgasms. The key concept here is that pleasure and ejaculation are not inextricably linked. With practice, most men can learn to identify the sensations leading up to orgasm—their particular point of no return—and squeeze the PC muscle before they reach it. This allows them to stay hard and keep going until they decide to let go all the way.
Not your traditional sex position, this is great for sensual, take-your-time, face-to-feet action. Because it limits eye contact, this tactic allows you to focus on touch. Use hands all over your lover’s body. Tickle her clitoris, rub his feet, massage the inner thighs. Enjoy the angle, too, because this hits spots in her that she may never have felt before.
You’ll both get turned on if you touch yourselves.
Use a vibrator for an even bigger buzz.
Try a mid-act footrub for a surprising sensation.
“The shower can be a place for superb sexual contact, whether you’re using it for warm-up, rubdown, or as center stage for the main event. Shower nozzles aren’t just for cleaning off, they can act like a vibrator—if you can detach the head it can rock her clitoris—or if you’re big into water fights, you can angle the nozzle to spray your partner all over. Getting silly in the water can throw some extra splash into your sex life.”
Emily
“Spontaneous sex truly gets the adrenaline flowing. Just like in life, the unplanned events are often the ones we remember the most. So, just start with the kitchen table. And while you’re in the kitchen, why even finish the meal if you can make sex the main course?”
The washing machine is ideal for adding a thrill to many positions. The height’s just right, and the novelty and vibrations make for a mighty sexy combination.
It might sound odd at first, but the laundry room is the perfect place to get down and dirty. The wash cycle produces an intriguing range of vibrations, and the dryer releases sensual heat—although you may want to leave the dryer off and just make your own heat. The machine doesn’t even have to be turned on, as long as you both are. But when it is, you’re in for a new sexual adventure.
If your heights don’t quite match up, you can step on a stool or other sturdy object to help even things out a bit. In a number of positions, the woman will be the one sitting or lying on the machine, but it’s also fun to try things with the guy sitting on top of it. She can then sit on him and wrap her legs around his waist, or squat over him. As the vibrations of the washing machine work their way through, it will turn him into her very own lovely vibrating sex toy.
Do a warm wash or even a hot one. If you use the cotton cycle, you’ll feel the longest, fastest spin—which, of course, means the most vibration.
{1} Get started by warming up your lover with a little oral action.
{2} Before she jumps into your arms, have her lift one knee up.
{3} She’ll be easier to lift with her arms wrapped around your shoulders. You can help support her by holding her feet, thighs, or butt.
{4} Most kitchen counters are a perfect height for this position.
{5} Alternate with her lying first on one side, then the other. You can use her shoulders for support while you thrust.
{6} End in doggie-style. Her body tucked in a tight ball will provide fabulous friction for both parties.
52 SIT DOWN AND ENJOY YOURSELF
The next time you’re feeling frisky, look around the house for inspiration. You can have fun with a chair, a couch, the stairs, or the dining room rug. No matter where you stage the main event, you’ll find a range of ways to vary your body positions. Change who’s on top and who’s working harder. Try positions where you sit, stand, and spoon to benefit from all possible angles, and don’t stop kissing and touching throughout—it will keep you feeling emotionally connected in the more technically challenging poses. If something feels more silly than sexy, move on. No matter where or how you do it, do it with a smile, a laugh, and love in your eyes. The best sex positions are those you enjoy with someone you feel really connected to. One safety note—be sure any chair you use is sturdy, or braced against a wall. Toppling over mid-act is no fun.
1 Don’t be shy—get a little closer. Explore your partner with lips and hands to build arousal.
2 Work the frottage. (In layperson’s terms, that means rubbing on your partner for erotic titillation.)
3 She can brace her body against a chair to create more resistance, which leads to deeper thrusting.
4 Even if you can’t hold a position forever, don’t be afraid to try new angles for experimentation.
5 Turn around and around, letting your partner see the sights from all different angles.
{1} As you’re scouting for sexual adventure, don’t overlook couches and overstuffed chairs. Comfy and casual, they provide additional back support, and their low height (compared with a bed) makes a range of sexual positions possible.
{2} The woman can straddle the man’s lap; the soft, padded sofa cushions might make riding easier on her knees. If the cushions aren’t cooperating, he can bounce his knees a bit, sending her up and down with hardly any effort.
{3} Hold hands so she can lean back farther—this creates an anchoring line that allows for heavier rocking and rolling.
You may have seen a standing wheelbarrow position depicted in books or movies—the man standing, penetrating the woman while she walks on her hands. It looks interesting, but it’s neither easy to do nor particularly satisfying. Instead of going to extremes, try this alternative wheelbarrow instead.
To get in this position, she starts in reverse cowgirl, then slowly leans forward so that her hands rest on the floor.
For an especially adventurous and athletic variation, start out facing each other, with the woman on top. She then slowly arches back until her hands hit the floor behind her in a bridge-like stance. With her hands on the floor for support, she’ll be able to thrust herself up and down on his body.
If you’re looking for a place to get away (whether from the family, roommates, or just from the bed), the shower is a delightful alternative to sex on dry land.
The shower is tailor-made for steamy sex sessions. It’s warm, it’s wet, and it lets you go wild, since the sound of running water drowns out any squeals, grunts, or groans you might make.
A position with the woman bending over and the man entering her from behind works wonderfully in the shower. It offers stability, because she can anchor her hands on her calves for support. (This pose is also great for sex anywhere you don’t have a good surface to lean on.) If you’re more of a bathtub couple, climb on in there—bubbles add some soapy fun. He can recline in the tub while she crouches above him, grabbing on to the tub’s side for a little extra stability.
Whether you’re doing it in the shower or in the bathtub, you’ll want to use a silicone-based lubricant. Silicone lubes are waterproof, meaning they need both soap and water to be removed and won’t wash off unless you want them to. Do be sure to rinse all your bits before you leave the shower—you’re already in there, so you may as well get clean!
LOOK WITH THE RIGHT EYES, AND EVERY SURFACE IN YOUR HOUSE SEEMS SEXY.
SWINGING ON THE PORCH A swing on the porch, a poolside lounge, or other garden furniture lets you experience outdoor action without fear of prying eyes. Just be sure your neighbors don’t have a view into your yard.
PILLOW PROPS Pillows allow you to try a range of positions and angles that might otherwise be uncomfortable. And a pillow placed under a woman’s lower back during missionary sex provides more direct clitoral stimulation.
STEP IT UP Want it so bad you can’t even make it upstairs? It can be wildly sexy to just strip down and do it right there. She can push him onto the steps and ride him, or he can bend her over the first step and take her from behind.
HAVE A BALL A Pilates ball can be used for more than one kind of workout. She can kneel on it, braced against a wall; lie with her back on the ball and her knees bent; or bend over it. Just keep the action gentle so you don’t lose your balance.
This stance allows you to make sexy eye contact and relish the full sight of each other’s naked bodies. With her feet over his shoulders, he can feel himself deep inside her, while she controls the speed of thrusting. Or she may choose to lie flat on her back and wrap her legs around his waist.