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Jade was being ridiculous. She had no reason to be this nervous. And for what? A testimony? She’d talked about her past plenty of times. Why should doing it on stage in front of her entire church be any different?
Staring at her reflection in the mirror, she wiped her sweaty palms on her pants. Come on, girl. You’ve got this.
The bathroom door swung open, and Jade jumped as her daughter burst through.
“Dezzirae Rose Jackson,” Jade snapped, then paused to collect her breath. “You nearly gave me a heart attack.”
“I’m sorry, Mama.”
“Forget it.” Jade let her daughter cling to her leg and adjusted a barrette holding one of Dez’s corn rows. “What are you doing here scaring me half to death? Aren’t you supposed to be downstairs playing?”
Dez shrugged. “Got bored.”
As cute as Dez looked in her God is my Superhero T-shirt and sparkling light-up tennis shoes, Jade didn’t have time for any extra drama tonight. She gave her daughter a well-rehearsed scowl. “You know you’re not supposed to be bugging me right now. I’ve got to get ready for my talk. How many times do I have to tell you?”
Another shrug.
“Aren’t there any other little kids down there?” Jade asked.
Her daughter rolled her eyes dramatically. “Just Mrs. Spencer’s grandkids, and they’re still babies.”
“They’re a year younger than you are,” Jade huffed.
“Two years.” Dez jutted out her lower lip and cocked her head to the side. “And besides, if I stay downstairs, Mrs. Spencer’s gonna make me practice my angel lines for the Christmas play, and it’s just too hard. Can’t I stay up here with you? Mrs. Spencer said it’s all right with her.”
“Well, it’s not all right with me.”
“How come?”
“Because I’ve got to focus on what I’m going to say, and I can’t worry about whether or not you’re sitting there squirming in your seat.” She kissed the top of her daughter’s head then pushed her out the door. “Now get yourself back downstairs. And march.”
Dez stomped out, staring at her feet. Soon, her light-up tennis shoes distracted her, and she bounced away.
“Oh, that girl,” Jade groaned and checked to make sure the backs of her earrings hadn’t fallen out. She’d checked them half a dozen times by now, but it was the only thing she could think of to do to get her nerves to settle down.
Lord, you’ve got to help me get through this.
Her hands were a clammy, sweaty mess, and she washed them again at the sink. After giving herself one more glance in the mirror to make sure everything was right where it was supposed to be, she walked out the door. She had to head downstairs to have a talk with Dez’s Sunday school teacher. Mrs. Spencer had agreed to come tonight to watch the kids, and Jade felt it was only right that she give Mrs. Spencer fair warning. Dez had been a handful and a half all day. She was already five but had missed the cutoff for kindergarten by a week and a half. It wasn’t even Christmas yet, and already Jade regretted not making a bigger push with the elementary school to accept Dez early. She was acting up nearly every day at the daycare where Jade worked and even gave one of the smaller boys a white-wash when she pushed him down in the snow. Jade had put up with enough of other people’s drama in her own life. There was no way she was going to see her daughter turn into a bully.
She was halfway to the stairs when someone called her name.
Jade turned around. “Hey, girl.” She might weigh twice as much as her petite friend, but she didn’t worry about squeezing too tight as she wrapped Aisha up in a hug. “I’m heading on downstairs,” Jade explained. “Got to talk to Dez’s teacher.”
“Hold on,” Aisha said. “There’s someone here to see you.”
Jade followed her friend’s darting eyes, which landed on a tall white man in a crisp navy blue trooper’s uniform. Jade scowled. “Who’s that?”
“New trooper,” Aisha explained. “He just moved to Glennallen from the bush.”
“Is he joining the church or what?” Jade didn’t like the way he was staring at her.
The trooper took a few steps closer, and Aisha shuffled nervously. “Sorry, I should have told you sooner,” she whispered, but Jade didn’t have time to figure out what she was talking about.
The trooper descended on her, hand outstretched enthusiastically. “I’m Ben. You must be Jade.”
She gave him a glower. “What makes you think that?”
He gave Aisha a nervous glance, and Jade frowned at him disapprovingly. There were a dozen things annoying about being the only black person in a town as small as Glennallen. Having strangers presume to know her identity was toward the top of the list.
“Aisha pointed you out,” he answered.
Oh. That made more sense. Jade cleared her throat and took Ben’s hand into her sweaty palm. “Okay. Well, then, what can I do for you, officer?”
“I know you’re busy getting ready for tonight’s service, but can I talk to you? Won’t take more than a minute.”
Jade made a point of turning to look at the bear-shaped clock hanging in the church foyer. “Good, because a minute’s all I got.”
“Is there some place where we could sit down?”
Jade shrugged. “It’s a free country, right?” She decided Pastor Reggie wouldn’t be needing his office tonight, seeing as how he was on vacation with his family in the Lower 48. She started to head that way then stopped when Aisha touched her arm.
“Sorry,” she whispered again. “We started talking outside, and I mentioned that letter. I should have asked you first.”
“Yeah, you should have.” Jade brushed passed her friend, holding the door open for the trooper. Once they were situated in her pastor’s office, she crossed her arms and stared at him. “Like I said earlier, I don’t have a lot of time. What’s this all about?”