eight
Zoe studied Pastor Abe’s face. Something was definitely amiss. She’d expected more resistance to her request that he do the marrying tonight. Surely he’d offer more protest if he realized she’d chosen Dexter Dawson. Maybe he thought she was marrying a different man.
She glanced at the door, and not for the first time wondered if she was really doing the right thing by agreeing to wed Dexter. When she’d arrived to discover she was early, she’d almost turned around and walked away.
“Bishop Hills might still be here,” Pastor Abe said hesitantly. “But I’m not sure he’ll be in agreement to the marriage.”
“We don’t need the bishop’s permission, do we?”
“Not necessarily.” He tugged at his clerical collar as though it were choking him. “I suppose we could go over to Justice Woodcock’s house. He owes me a favor.”
“As in a justice of the peace?” Pastor Abe wasn’t making any sense. Since he’d just agreed to do the ceremony himself, why would they need to involve anyone else?
“Unless you had your heart set on a church wedding?”
Before she could answer, the side door opened. She expected to see Dexter Dawson and was surprised instead at the sight of a young man attired like Pastor Abe in a dark suit and clerical collar.
“John, my man,” Pastor Abe said, relief flooding his voice.
The young man smiled widely, revealing crooked front teeth but a kind-enough smile. He made a direct line to them, a waif of a man—short and thin and likely to be blown away at the slightest breeze. His face was dotted with various blemishes but radiated a youthful energy that reminded Zoe of her brother.
Pastor Abe and John exchanged a hug with some backslapping. “You’re just in time.”
“Time for what?” John peeked at Zoe shyly.
“In time for my wedding.”
Zoe sucked in a rapid breath, her gaze darting to Pastor Abe. He was getting married too?
John’s smile froze. “Your wedding?”
“Yes. I’m marrying Miss Hart tonight, and I’d like you to officiate.”
The world around Zoe began to spin. What was happening? Why did Pastor Abe think he was getting married to her? She replayed everything she’d said and done since she’d arrived at the cathedral. Had she somehow given him the impression that she wanted to marry him? Or had he heard about all the rejections today and assumed he was her only option? Maybe he’d heard of her plans to marry Dexter and decided to offer himself instead?
John’s smile fell away altogether. “I didn’t know you’d ended things with Lizzy.”
At the mention of the woman’s name, Pastor Abe’s expression hardened. “Lizzy is married to someone else now. I’m free to do as I please.”
“She’s married?” John squeaked.
“On Christmas Day, apparently.”
The hurt in Pastor Abe’s voice and the flash of pain in his eyes spoke all Zoe needed to know. Lizzy was the woman waiting for him back in England, the one Mrs. Moresby had mentioned. And she’d jilted Abe.
John cast another shy look at Zoe before leaning in toward Abe and muttering under his breath. “I didn’t know you were close to anyone else.”
“I’ve worked all week with Miss Hart saving a baby. While we’re not close, I have gotten to know her and can attest to her good character.”
John glanced back and forth between her and Pastor Abe as if somehow he could solve the mystery of their meeting and this hasty wedding. But Zoe was as confused as he was and could only shrug.
“We may as well begin,” Pastor Abe said.
John lifted off his tall black hat, wiped his forehead, then resettled the hat. “You’re certain?”
“As long as Miss Hart is certain.” Pastor Abe finally looked at Zoe, the blue of his eyes revealing deep wounds she hadn’t noticed there before. His jaw muscles worked up and down as though he was willing himself not to contradict his friend.
Was she certain? She’d come to the cathedral expecting to marry Dexter Dawson. But Pastor Abe was a better option by far. There was no question he was above reproach or that he’d accept and care for Violet—rather than simply tolerate the babe.
Truly the only other thing that mattered besides Violet was finding Zeke. Since Pastor Abe lived up in the mining region, no doubt he’d be able to help her find her brother, or at the very least he’d be kind enough to make inquiries.
“Herman Cox is dead,” Pastor Abe blurted.
Her heartbeat halted abruptly. Part of her wanted to shout out in relief. But another part of her grieved for Violet’s father and for the life he’d lost, especially because he’d never get to see his daughter grow up.
“Now my superior, Bishop Hills, has requested I take Violet to the Northerner’s Encampment,” Pastor Abe said as if that explained his willingness to marry her. “And he wants me to leave her there.”
Zoe had never heard of the place, but the gravity of Pastor Abe’s expression told her she needed to make sure Bishop Hills didn’t get his way. “Will he force you to do it?”
“I don’t see why he would if we’re married and agree to care for the child.”
She prayed he was right. “I was expecting to have to marry Dexter Dawson. But if you’re willing to marry me, how can I say no?”
Pastor Abe glanced at a crumpled piece of paper on the floor, paused a moment, and then gave a curt nod. “Let us proceed.”
She had the feeling if she didn’t take advantage of this moment, if she waited even five more minutes, he’d come to his senses and walk away, that she’d lose the chance to marry him and end up stuck with Dexter.
Pastor Abe positioned himself in front of John expectantly. And Zoe took her place at his side.
Once again John looked from her to Abe and back, his brow furrowing above baffled eyes. “This is most unusual, to be sure.” He slipped his hand into an inner pocket and retrieved his Book of Common Prayer.
“Unusual circumstances call for unusual measures.” Pastor Abe didn’t break the intensity of his stance.
“Very well, my friend.” John opened the well-worn black book. “I trust you like I do no other and realize you wouldn’t enter into so serious a commitment without a great deal of prayer and thought.”
Pastor Abe flinched but didn’t budge.
John flipped the thin pages until he found what he was looking for. He started to read the opening of the marriage ceremony.
“Perhaps just the vows?” Pastor Abe suggested in a tight voice.
John’s eyes widened. He looked as though he might say something more, but after a second, he nodded and began to turn the pages ahead in the service.
“‘Wilt thou have this woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God’s ordinance, in the holy estate of matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honor, and keep her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?’”
Pastor Abe didn’t respond.
Zoe peeked at him sideways. The muscles in his jaw were once again flexing, and his eyes were filled with distress. She didn’t know what had happened to cause such anguish. In fact, she didn’t know much about him at all. But compassion stirred in her nonetheless. She wanted to reach out and comfort him, to let him know he wasn’t alone in his hardship, that she understood what it was like to feel such pain.
But she sensed that if she touched him, he’d only draw away, perhaps even leave the cathedral.
“Abraham?” John asked, his tone pleading with his friend to see reason.
“I will,” Pastor Abe said quickly, decisively.
John watched his friend for a long second before turning his attention back to the open page of his book. “‘Wilt thou have this man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God’s ordinance, in the holy estate of matrimony? Wilt thou obey him, serve him, love, honor, and keep him in sickness and in health, and forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?’”
“I will,” she replied.
John then situated Pastor Abe’s right hand together with hers as was the custom. Pastor Abe’s fingers were cold and clammy, but unswerving. He repeated his vows without hesitation. When he finished, Zoe spoke hers.
“Do you have a ring?” John directed his question to Pastor Abe.
He shook his head. “I’ll purchase one just as soon as I can arrange it.”
“Very well. Then let us pray.” John read a prayer and afterward placed their hands together again. “‘Those whom God hath joined together, let no man put asunder. Forasmuch as you have consented together in holy wedlock, and have witnessed the same before God, and thereto have given and pledged your troth, I pronounce that you be man and wife together. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.’”
Pastor Abe kept his head bowed. Zoe didn’t want to interrupt his prayer—if he was still praying—so she remained quiet. John bowed his head too, stealing a look now and again at Pastor Abe. After several minutes of silence, John finally stared directly at his friend and cleared his throat.
Pastor Abe lifted his face, determination etching his features.
John clamped his friend on the shoulder. “Congratulations, Abraham. May God bless your union and bring you great happiness through it.”
“Thank you, John.”
John turned to her with his warm smile. “May God bless you too, Mrs. Merivale.”
Mrs. Merivale. She was Mrs. Merivale. How strange.
“You have for yourself a very fine husband in Abraham,” John continued. “No woman could ask for a better man.”
“Apparently Lizzy could,” Pastor Abe murmured.
John’s smile faltered. “Ah well. ’Tis her loss entirely and Mrs. Merivale’s gain.”
The cathedral bell began to ring the top of the hour. Dexter Dawson was due at any moment. What would he say—or do—when he discovered she’d married someone else in his stead? Though she’d only encountered Dexter on a couple of occasions, she suspected he was the type of man who was accustomed to getting what he wanted and wouldn’t take kindly to her rejection.
“I best be going,” she said. “I don’t want to be away from Violet for too long.”
“Certainly,” Pastor Abe replied. “I shall walk with you to the Marine Barracks.”
And then what? She didn’t voice her question aloud. Though she was bold, she wasn’t quite so brazen.
The men spoke a few words of good-bye before Pastor Abe led the way toward the same side door that John had entered through. As they exited, she didn’t see Dexter anywhere, but she hastened her stride anyway and kept her head down.
“You’re in quite the hurry to return to Violet.” Pastor Abe easily kept pace with her.
“Aye. The women were nice enough to watch over her. But she gets fussy easily and can try the patience of a saint.”
Ahead, a raucous group turned onto the street, their laughter ringing out. The heavy darkness of the evening shrouded them, and the light from the sporadic streetlamps didn’t illuminate anything well enough for Zoe to identify them. But just in case Dexter Dawson was among them, she veered off the plank sidewalk into the muddy street and crossed to the other side.
Pastor Abe followed, and she was thankful when he didn’t attempt any more conversation. When they reached the front gate of the government complex, she stopped and hesitated.
He shifted and stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I shall go in with you and help you collect your belongings.”
“I don’t have much.” What would the other women say when they learned she was married? She hadn’t told anyone except for Mrs. Moresby of her plans.
“You’ll have Violet and her things.”
“She doesn’t have much either.” But with all the donations Mrs. Moresby had collected, Violet had a fair share more than Zoe did.
“Nevertheless, Miss Hart, I’d like to help.”
She wasn’t Miss Hart anymore. Everything in her life had changed in an instant when she’d spoken her wedding vows—including her name.
As if realizing the same, he shifted again and looked everywhere but at her.
“You can call me Zoe,” she offered softly.
“Very well . . . Zoe.” As he spoke, his gaze collided with hers. Bright light from the front windows of the government building cast a glow, turning his eyes a warm, innocent blue. He didn’t hold her gaze long before dropping it shyly. “You can address me as Abe.”
“Not Abraham?” she teased.
“If you prefer.”
“I like either one.”
“Then you can choose.” He toed a stone in the path until he knocked it loose.
Was he hesitant about having her lodge with him tonight? Where did he live while he was in Victoria? Maybe he didn’t have space for her and Violet. Perhaps they could avoid the whole awkward wedding night scenario if she stayed at the Marine Barracks until he was ready to leave Victoria and return to the mountains.
“I realize the wedding came up at the last minute and that you might not be prepared for me and Violet to stay with you. We can remain at the Marine Barracks awhile longer if you want.”
His arms were stiff with his hands still bunched in his pockets. “I have a place I stay whenever I’m in Victoria—one of the cabins on the bishop’s property. He makes them available to the traveling preachers whenever we’re in town.”
“I don’t want to impose.”
“You won’t.” His voice cracked, and he cleared his throat. “There’s plenty of room.”
She waited for him to glance up and reassure her. But he remained silent, his focus on the rock he was pushing around.
“Violet might keep you awake—”
“I don’t mind.”
“Are you sure?”
“Zoe.”
She liked the way he said her name, delicately and earnestly. And when he lifted his gaze again, she liked the kindness in his eyes.
“You’re my wife now. I plan to take care of you and Violet.”
His words sent warmth spiraling through her. How long had it been since anyone had taken care of her? Certainly not since Zeke had left. Maybe even before that.
“Thank you, Abe.”
He nodded, his lips rising with the beginning of a smile, almost as if he were pleased at her use of his given name. “Shall we go collect Violet?”
“Aye.”
He opened the gate and ushered her through. As they followed the path around the main government building to a center courtyard, her steps were much slower now. She couldn’t keep from noticing that once again he matched her pace, and she was all too aware of him beside her, especially his strong, towering height, the thickness of his arms, and the broadness of his chest.
“Did you have the chance to speak with Herman before he died?” she asked, needing to focus on something besides him.
“No. Unfortunately. I wasn’t able to locate him in time.”
“I’m sorry. I know you wanted to.”
He stopped, his head dropping in a posture of defeat. “I should have done more.”
His self-censure took her by surprise. She grabbed his arm and turned him to face her. “Don’t you be saying that. You did everything you could—more than anyone else. The truth was, Herman didn’t want you to find him, and there was nothing to be done about it.”
“I could have visited him more, and maybe I would have learned of Rose’s death and his grief sooner.” Abe’s dejection again surprised Zoe. She hadn’t realized pastors got discouraged or had regrets.
“I’m guessing his wife’s death wasn’t the first time Herman drowned his problems with drinking.”
“No. But I could have prayed for him more fervently.”
She lifted a hand to Abe’s cheek and forced his head up. The pain in his eyes radiated into Zoe so that her chest expanded with compassion for this generous man who clearly cared about the people he met. “You couldn’t help him, not when he didn’t want it. But you’ve been given the opportunity to help his daughter.”
He studied her face, the light from windows of the Marine Barracks illuminating the grassy yard where they stood. “You’re right. I can’t squander the chance to do for Violet what I couldn’t do for her father.”
She smiled her approval of his decision.
His return smile was easy and genuine—and very fine looking. She was suddenly conscious of the slight scruff on his cheek beneath her hand as well as the strength in his jaw along with the fact that he was her husband and she’d be living with him from now on.
Her heartbeat gave a strange lurch. She wasn’t actually looking forward to living with him, was she? She dropped her hand and took a step back. “I guess we should get on inside.”
As they moved up the stairs and he held open the door, she didn’t allow herself to look at him again. Instead, she mentally chastised herself to remember she didn’t want to care too deeply about a husband. Her heart ached too much already, and she didn’t want to allow herself to love again only to lose.
No, she was a bride of convenience. And she planned to remain that way.