“Are you busy?” Arcineh asked of Sam on Mother’s Day 1995.
“No, why?”
“Can we go to the cemetery?”
Not in the three years since Isabella’s death had Arcineh requested such a thing. The years had somehow flown by. Arcineh was halfway to her fifteenth birthday, and Sam could not have said where the time had gone. For a moment he looked into eyes that reminded him so much of his son that he ached to see them.
“Grandpa?” Arcineh questioned softly, not calling him Sam this time.
“Yes,” he said simply, drawing his mind back. “Right now?”
“I just need to grab a jacket.” Arcineh began to turn away and then stopped. “And can we make a stop on the way home?”
“Where?”
“I want to get flowers for Vi.”
“She would like that.”
“I should have done that last year. I thought of it but didn’t.”
Sam nodded.
“Oh,” Arcineh stopped, remembering something more. “I spent my allowance on a purse, so I’ll need to borrow some money.”
“Your entire allowance on one purse?” Sam clarified.
“And some shoes.”
Sam stared at his granddaughter, knowing he’d created this monster but still not willing to live with her.
“We’ll go to the cemetery,” he said, his voice holding no rebuke. “And we’ll get Violet whatever you like, but sometime very soon we’ll visit the subject of your spending.”
Arcineh had known he would say this and did not argue. All she wanted to do right now was get to the cemetery. For the first time in her life it was important, and yet she was scared. She just wanted to go before she could change her mind.
“Did you order this?” Arcineh asked as she looked at the large ornate headstone that held her parents’ names. Dark gray marble with a beautifully etched picture of a river and trees, and then their names in lovely script with the dates they were born and died. Between them rested a heart, their wedding date carved inside.
Arcineh touched it all very gently, not noticing that her grandfather hadn’t answered. Sam was so choked up at the sight of this, remembering the day they’d been buried, that he thought his throat would burst.
Not until Arcineh turned to him with swimming eyes did he feel as if he could openly cry. He broke down, hugging Arcineh close when she came to him, both of them awash with fresh grief.
Arcineh didn’t know why she had wanted to come. It hadn’t helped at all. Mother’s Day had not meant anything to her the last few years, and she wished she hadn’t tried to change that.
“I want to go,” she sobbed. “I just want to get flowers for Violet and hug her.”
Sam did not argue. The lovely lawn and spring flowers that bloomed all around were lost on Sam Bryant. This was a place of death. A place of hopelessness and of no return. He sincerely wished that Arcineh would never want to come again.
“Sam,” Arcineh said in the car after nearly an hour. Traffic was awful, and it had taken a long time for Arcineh to stop crying.
“Yeah?”
“What happened to Grandma Bryant?”
“She left,” he said simply.
“Why?”
“A lot of reasons, I suppose, but mostly because I worked all the time and she was alone.”
“But what about my dad and Aunt Tiffany?”
“Your grandmother wanted a new life. She couldn’t do that with two children.”
Arcineh looked over at her grandfather’s profile. He was still a handsome man. He never seemed lonely, but Arcineh now wondered.
“I have no idea where she is,” Sam went on thoughtfully. “I couldn’t even tell her about Trevor’s death.”
This never occurred to Arcineh’s young heart. She felt cold with the thought that someone she loved could die and she wouldn’t even know.
“Are you all right?” Sam asked.
“I think so. Are we almost there?”
“Yes, there’s a place that will have just what you want.”
And he was right. Even on Sunday, Arcineh found a beautiful bouquet for Violet. That lady was surprised speechless when Arcineh walked into the kitchen with it. Arcineh didn’t care. Violet’s loving arms around her were all the thanks she wanted.
“Starting the second week of your summer, you’re going to come to my office three days a week and work.”
Arcineh was so stunned by Sam’s words that she couldn’t say a thing.
“You’ll be filing, typing, and anything else Carlee wants you to do. You’ll be quiet, and work hard, and I’ll pay you well.”
“Why?” Arcineh finally managed.
“You’ve got too much time on your hands during the summer, and you need to understand that money doesn’t grow on trees.”
“I was going to keep working on my Italian and French,” she argued. She had gone overseas twice more with him in the last year, and her languages improved each time.
“You can’t do both?”
“What kind of summer is that?”
“The kind you’re going to have.”
And that, Arcineh learned, was the end of that. She had one week off to do as she pleased, but on Monday morning, June 12, feeling as though she was still asleep, she climbed into her grandfather’s Bentley and went with him to start her first day of work.
Sam watched the male interns waiting to get on the elevator and had enough heart for them to feel sorry. They knew he was standing nearby, but not looking at Arcineh was nearly killing them. And she was worth a second glance. She didn’t go overboard with her makeup or wear the high heels that she loved, but her hair, face, and clothing always looked together. And she was beautiful, all biases aside.
Sam had not considered her effect on the office when he suggested that she work with him. At times it amused him, and at other times he felt concern. For the first few weeks, he kept a very close watch on Arcineh, but she seemed preoccupied with doing her job. This pleased Sam—it pleased him very much—but it was a curiosity to him as well.
He was under the impression that most young ladies were looking to hook a man, or at least practice their flirting skills, but Arcineh didn’t seem to fit his mold. She would deliver packages or files to some of the best-looking men in his office and not seem to give them a second glance.
Arcineh, on the other hand, affected them very much. Sam had been forced to turn a laugh into a cough when one of the newer men poured coffee on his pants simply because Arcineh walked by the break room.
The elevator arrived, and Sam pulled his mind back to the business at hand—not just the marble business, but also the one of keeping an eye on Arcineh.
Arcineh loved Carlee. She was bright and fun and she treated Arcineh like an adult. She included her for breaks and lunch, and when Arcie got to work with Carlee, the time flew.
“I’ve got some advice for you,” Carlee said when August was half over.
“What is it?”
“If you ever go searching outside of this office for work, you’ll have to remember some things if you want to get hired for the right reason.”
Hanging on every word, Arcineh listened carefully.
“You’re a very beautiful girl, which means if you dress as nicely as you do, in clothing that accentuates that, some men may hire you so they can look at you or try to get away with something.
“At the same time,” Carlee went on, “many women won’t hire someone who looks like you because they’ll see you as competition.”
“Is that all true?” Arcineh asked, finding it hard to believe.
“Yes. The best secretaries and office workers blend into the background. Sometimes it’s the safest way.”
Arcineh looked into Carlee’s large blue eyes and saw that she didn’t have a bit of makeup on. Arcineh realized at the moment that more than one time that summer she had wished Carlee would do a little more with herself. Suddenly she knew this was just the way Carlee wanted it.
“What if you meet a man and you want to catch his attention?” Arcineh asked.
Carlee smiled, thinking this one was much too bright for her own good.
“You’re 15, Arcie.” The secretary’s voice was gentle. “I’m not about to tell you that. If by 20 you don’t have it figured out, come back and see me.”
Arcineh smiled at her. “You promise?”
“Yes, but I don’t think it’s a promise I’m going to have to keep.”
Arcineh didn’t press Carlee, but her own question stayed on her mind for a long time that evening. Indeed she fell asleep still thinking about it.
Sam took Arcineh to her first day of tenth grade, hoping that he’d done the right thing. He’d decided he could fit in one more trip to Paris before Labor Day, and Arcineh had asked to go along. Sam was so pleased by her willingness, he didn’t see what followed next. She hit every shop she could find, including a hairdresser who taught Arcineh how to straighten her naturally wavy hair. The look was stunningly different, and even Sam had not been able to stop staring at her.
“Do me a favor,” Sam said when she moved to get out of the car. “Let them down easy.”
“Let who down easy?”
“The boys who ask you out.”
“Sam,” she said with a smile, “I’ve been going to school with these guys for years. There’s no one new.”
“Only you.”
Their eyes met, and Arcineh saw what he meant.
“Lean over here so I can kiss you,” Sam told her. Arcineh added a hug to the kiss Sam put on her cheek and then slipped from the car. She thought a few people might look at her hair and new clothes, but all but dismissed what her grandfather had said. Arcineh swiftly learned she’d been naive. Nothing could have prepared her for what the next few days would bring.
“It makes me so angry, Vi. What am I supposed to do about it?”
“Go over it with me one more time,” Violet requested. “Slowly this time.”
“Okay, it’s like this. Brody Hammel came back for his junior year looking amazing—tan, skin cleared up, tall, and muscular.”
“Okay.”
“Both Hillary and Daisy have mad crushes on him, but he asked me out.”
“And they’re both mad at you?”
“Exactly.”
“What did you say?”
“About what?”
“To him when he asked you out?”
“I said no! I don’t want all my friends mad at me.”
Violet looked at her lovely familiar face and wished there was a way for the girls to know that their friendships with each other were important. It was a sad fact that most boys came and went.
“Did you want to say yes?” Violet asked next.
Arcineh frowned. She hadn’t even thought about it.
“I don’t know. I’ve known Brody for a long time, and all we’ve ever been is friends. I don’t think he really wanted to ask me out—I think he just thought we’d look good together.”
“How do you know that?”
“Oh, something Bryn said. Maybe she doesn’t know, but it sounded like something that might happen. The boys at school can be so shallow.”
“How much do you wish you had a boyfriend?” Violet asked.
“A little bit. Usually I don’t feel I have time for one.”
Violet couldn’t argue with that. Arcineh’s summer had been full and had gone by very swiftly. The school year would be even worse.
“So what will you do?” Violet asked in her wonderfully practical way.
“For the moment, be glad it’s Friday.”
Arcineh grabbed an apple from the always-available fruit bowl and left the kitchen. Not many minutes passed before Violet heard the beat of music.
“Be glad it’s Friday and get a little dancing in too,” the housekeeper said to herself, continuing her work on dinner and wondering what the rest of the school year would bring.
Quinn had not planned on fighting with Arcineh. In fact, the last few times they’d been together, she had been fairly content, but when the family visited in October for Arcineh’s fifteenth birthday, Quinn took one look at her cousin and thought she might actually hate her.
She didn’t care that Arcineh’s parents were dead; Quinn wished hers were dead all too often. All Quinn could see was the perfect person Arcie was—smart and beautiful, with all the money any girl could want.
Quinn found it easy to forget that Arcineh had worked all summer and hadn’t complained. She knew her cousin got good grades but never believed she had to work for them.
Quinn’s tortured thoughts set the entire weekend on edge. Even Sam noticed her quietness, thought she might be struggling with her self-image again, and decided not to give Arcineh her gift until the family had left after the weekend.
However, this drove Quinn and Austin crazy, and in turn, they nearly drove Arcineh out of her mind.
“Just tell me,” Austin said for the fifth time on Saturday morning.
“Are you deaf, Austin?” Arcineh asked. “I don’t have it yet. If I knew what I was getting, I’d tell you.”
Austin clearly didn’t believe her, and Arcineh had had enough.
“You only want to know so you can taunt Quinn. You’re so pathetic, Austin.”
Austin turned and left, his face showing how angry he was and also how close Arcineh had come to the mark.
Arcineh didn’t care what he thought. She just wanted peace. Unfortunately Quinn had other ideas. She was at her door just minutes later.
“What did Grandpa give you?”
“He hasn’t given me anything yet,” Arcineh said, thinking this might be the longest birthday of her life. Her cousins, the least favorite people in her life, were in town, making the hours drag.
“You’re lying.”
“Why would I lie about that?”
Quinn didn’t have a good answer for that, so she turned and left. Arcineh sat down on her bed and tried not to think about the disappointments of this school year. Things still weren’t completely ironed out with Hillary and Daisy. Brody had stopped asking her out, but because he hadn’t sought either of them out, they didn’t believe her.
What is it about me that makes people think I lie? she suddenly asked herself. My cousins think I’m hiding my gift from Sam, and Hillary thinks I’m secretly seeing Brody.
Arcineh sat and brooded over this for a time and then got mad at herself. She realized she didn’t care what the others thought. Violet would have said it wasn’t her problem. She wasn’t seeing Brody, and if her grandfather wanted to give her the moon for her fifteenth birthday, that was his choice!
Arcineh eventually got into her swimsuit and went down to the pool. It was just plain cold outside, but since the pool had gone in, her grandfather had agreed to leave it heated until her birthday each year.
The family heard her splashing around, and it wasn’t long before they joined her. Tiffany, Austin, and Quinn took up residence in the hot tub, but Jeremy challenged Arcineh to a water volleyball game and even took the deep end. Violet served German chocolate cake that night, Arcineh’s favorite kind, and in the morning, the Rowan family left right after breakfast.
As soon as they departed, Sam, looking mischievous and much too pleased with himself, took Arcineh to the garage. Parked next to his car was a brand new BMW 5 Series.
“Happy birthday, honey,” Sam said quietly.
“But I’m 15,” Arcineh pointed out when her mouth would work.
“You’ll be starting Driver’s Ed in just a few months and need this. Besides, everyone expects it at 16. This way it’s really a surprise.”
Sam found his neck in a stranglehold, and Arcineh could not stop laughing.
“Was it a good birthday?” Sam whispered in her ear, still hugging her tight.
“The best,” Arcineh said with a laugh, knowing she would never be able to explain.
“Tiffany called,” Sam said a few days later. He’d found Arcie in the family room and caught her between songs. “It seems Quinn is pretty upset with you.”
Her grandfather never told her what her aunt said during their phone calls, so this took her by surprise. She turned the stereo off and sat on one of the sofas. Sam took a chair.
“Did she say why she was upset?”
“She says she tried to discuss something with you, and you wouldn’t talk about it.”
Arcineh nodded, her face turning impassive.
“Do you know what it was?” Sam asked.
“Yes.”
“Are you going to tell me?”
“There’s no point. When Quinn is involved, you never believe me.”
“That’s not true.”
Arcineh only stared at him, and Sam heard himself. Sam’s hand went to the back of his neck, and he rubbed at the ache there. He knew men who deliberately had children at his age, but in his view, being a father to a teenager at this stage in his life was almost impossible.
“I’m sorry you don’t think I believe you,” Sam apologized lamely. “I didn’t mean to do that.”
Arcineh shrugged but still knew it was no use trying to explain. On an impulse she took another tact.
“You’re something of a prize these days, Sam.”
Sam stared at her, wondering where she was going.
“It wasn’t like that when my parents were alive, but now that I’m here, you’re the prize and Quinn has to have you. That might not be news to you, but this will be. I’m not in the competition. I’m not going to vie for your attention or anyone else’s. Either you want me or you don’t.
“There’s a boy at school right now that all my friends like, but he likes me. They’re all mad at me about that. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I can’t control his feelings. I look forward to the weekend when I can come home and just be here with you and Violet. It’s hard when there are others because everyone wants to compete with me, and I don’t know where to go.”
Sam felt his heart clench. He hadn’t known that she felt this way, and he hadn’t known about her friends.
“I’m sorry about your friends, Arcineh. I didn’t know.”
“I think I told Violet all about it, and that got it out of my system.”
“But I still don’t understand.” Sam could not let go of Tiffany’s call. “Why couldn’t you just discuss what Quinn wanted to talk about?”
“Because I didn’t know what you were getting me for my birthday until after they left.”
Sam’s mouth opened. “That’s what she wanted to know?”
“She and Austin both. They didn’t believe me when I said you hadn’t given me my gift yet.”
Sam did not know what he was expecting, but this wasn’t it.
Arcineh was expecting some type of apology, and when it didn’t come, she stood to cover her hurt.
“I’m going to finish my workout now.”
“All right,” Sam said, his head in a complete muddle.
Not waiting for him to leave, Arcineh went back to the stereo and turned the music up loud. She kept her back to the door after the music fired up. By the time the dance turned her around, her grandfather was gone.
“Hi,” Daisy said quietly, coming to stand at Arcineh’s table in the library at the beginning of November.
“Hi,” Arcineh said in return.
“Can I sit down?”
“Sure.”
Daisy sat, but she looked upset. Arcineh waited for her to talk, sure that if she said anything it would only get her into more trouble.
“So it’s like this,” Daisy began, glancing at Arcineh from time to time but not holding her gaze. “I just had a long talk with Brody this morning, and he told me what you said.”
“What was that?”
“That you wouldn’t go out with him and lose all your friends, and then I realized because we didn’t believe you, you lost us anyhow.”
Daisy was crying now, and Arcineh just listened.
“I’m so sorry, Arcie. Do you remember when we both liked Richard? And we promised never to let a guy split us up? And then I broke my promise.”
Daisy put her hands over her face to cover her tears, but her whole body shook with the intensity of it all.
“It’s all right,” Arcineh said, not sure it really was but wanting Daisy back in her life so much that it hurt. “You don’t have to cry anymore.”
Daisy looked at her, her makeup having gone on the run. Arcineh dug in her purse and handed her a mirror.
“And to think my shrink has been working on me for days,” Daisy muttered into the mirror, “trying to get me to a good place for when you didn’t forgive me.”
“Your shrink?” Arcineh didn’t bother to hold her surprise.
“Yes! I’ve been so sad about all of this, my mother made me go.”
“Has it helped?” Arcineh asked, glad that her grandfather had never forced her to talk to a stranger.
“A little,” Daisy sniffed as she tried to fix her face, “but I missed your birthday.”
“That’s all right,” Arcineh said and meant it this time. “Sam more than made up for everyone.”
“Jewelry?” Daisy guessed, handing back the mirror.
“A car.”
“But you’re 15!”
“That’s what I said, but he says everyone gets one at 16, and what’s the surprise in that?”
Daisy cried again, this time with laughter. Before the teacher in charge that day could come and tell them to hush, they had made plans for the weekend. The girls would spend one night at Arcineh’s, the next night at Daisy’s, and fill every minute in between.