Chapter 18
Conversation continued for another half hour, mostly Ruth and Tony expressing certainty that God had accepted Harry, with some in the crowd celebrating the news and some arguing. As people began to leave, Amy asked Aunt Bay for directions to the washroom.
As she’d hoped, when she came back only a few stragglers remained. Aunt Bay stood chatting in a knot of women.
Projecting all the confidence she could, Amy approached the front of the room, where the speakers and a few others lingered. She caught Ruth’s eye. The dark-haired woman excused herself from the conversation and approached Amy. “Hi. You look like you have something on your mind.”
Amy stuck out her hand. “Amy Silver.” She snapped her mouth shut. Heat flooded her face. It was her standard professional greeting, but with Ruth, of all people, she’d planned to hide her connection with Harry.
Ruth’s eyes widened. She took Amy’s hand. “It’s good to meet you, Amy. Silver’s not a common name. I expect it’s hard to share it with a dangerous offender.”
“He’s my cousin. We’ve never met.”
She held Amy’s hand a little longer, then released it. The gesture didn’t look like it cost anything, but to Amy it was the difference between yet another rejection and acceptance.
Ruth’s face was open. Friendly. “Harry mentioned his sister and her son, but I didn’t know he had any other family.”
“His sister lived with my mom and me for a few years. He probably doesn’t know I exist.”
“You’re quite a bit younger than Harry.” Ruth seemed to brace herself. “How do you feel about his coming to faith?”
“I need to ask how you can be sure.”
Her face softened. “I saw the change, Amy. He couldn’t have faked it, and the man who abducted me wouldn’t have faked it. He was as God-hostile as they come.” She smiled. “You need to hear his story, but I promise you, he’s been transformed. Only God could do that.”
“But why?”
Ruth’s brows drew together. Her head dipped nearer to Amy’s. “Why what?”
“Why would God do that? Accept him, after all he’s done?”
Ruth’s laugh carried delight, not scorn. “Because He’s God, and He wants to save us all. Plus, it shows how powerful He is. Most of us don’t think it takes a lot of effort on His part to clean us up. Someone like Harry? People sit up and take notice.”
“How can you know? That He wants to save us all? Aren’t there limits?”
“Walk with me.” Ruth led her to the far end of the front row of seats. She sat, and beckoned Amy to join her. “I’m guessing you don’t know the Lord too well yet.”
Mistake. Sinful. What a shame. The words crashed into Amy’s thoughts. She shoved them away.
When Amy didn’t speak, Ruth asked, “If God saved Harry, what could keep Him from saving you?”
“But what if it’s not true?”
Ruth nodded gently. “As in, what if you risk it and the bottom falls out?”
Amy stared at her hands, clenched in her lap. “Beatrice — my friend who brought me — says what you say, that God can forgive anything. But that’s not what I was told as a child.”
“Amy…” Ruth’s voice was soft, motherly. Her arm slid around Amy’s shoulders. “Tell me what it is. It cannot be worse than what Harry did.”
“I need proof. If I trust people’s opinions but God thinks different—” The dam burst. “I’m illegitimate.” She braced for Ruth’s reaction.
The other woman shifted a bit closer. “And…?”
Amy stared at her knees. “My father went home to his wife. Mom never told him. They weren’t married.”
“And you’ve felt cut off from your Heavenly Father because of your parents’ decisions.”
“It wasn’t my sin — how could I confess it and be forgiven?”
“I see.”
Amy’s muscles tightened into a shield. Inside, hope bled out.
Ruth’s arm left Amy’s shoulders and she shuffled a few inches away. “Amy? Look at me, please.”
Jaw tight, Amy forced her tear-blurred eyes to make contact. To meet this verdict head-on. The compassion on Ruth’s face nearly undid her.
“Sympathy will just make it worse.” Could Ruth even hear her broken words?
Ruth’s expression didn’t change. “The Bible has many names to show God’s character. One of them is ‘Father to the Fatherless.’” She took Amy’s hands. “He adopts us. He knows we can’t earn our way into relationship with Him, so He does it for us.”
A ringing started in Amy’s ears. “Can you show me that? In the Bible?”
“Of course.” Ruth pulled out her phone and tapped the screen.
Released, Amy’s hands felt chilled. She tucked them under her arms. “Fatherless. I’ve been called that before. And worse.” The labels queued on her tongue, but she held them back.
“Here it is.” Ruth scrolled through text, then back to the top. “Psalm 68. It’s a bit long, and some of it won’t make sense to you, but listen to verse five. ‘A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling.’” She passed Amy the phone to read for herself. “I can show you in my print Bible, now that I know where to look.”
“Please.”
Ruth walked away. Amy stayed focused on the text, tiny black words on a white screen. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling. She read verse six as well. God sets the lonely in families, He leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.
There was more, but Amy’s eyes snapped back to that one, heart-stopping phrase. Father to the fatherless.
Ruth settled beside her and extended her opened Bible, pointing to the text. “Sometimes seeing things in print makes them more real.”
Amy took the book. She slid her finger over the words on their smooth page. “Can I trust this? I’ve heard about people using the Bible to justify whatever they want.”
“You can trust it. People do take things out of context, and this is just one verse out of I don’t know how many in the whole Bible. Once God adopts you as His own, the journey really begins. Spending time with Him, reading the rest of this book… it’s a lifetime’s learning.”
After a minute, Amy looked up from the text. “So I have to take it on faith, and experience will prove it?” Or experience would prove she’d made a disastrous mistake. Would God actually zap her with lightning? Could she risk losing her half-life with Michael?
“Faith in God, yes, and in His word. Not faith in my opinion.” Ruth scanned the room. “You said you came with a friend. Is she still here?”
“She’d better be, or I’m walking home. But she doesn’t know about my parents.”
“Will she hold it against you?”
“Not unless she thinks God does.”
Ruth nodded. “Then let her be your second opinion about that verse. If you’re ready to tell her.”
Amy turned in her seat. Aunt Bay stood with her back to them. The two friends with her also faced away on an angle. “The church ladies when I was a child made it sound so terrible — so final. Even if Aunt Bay agrees, how can I be sure you’re right and they were wrong?”
“Amy, sin is anything that separates us from God… what we do, what we don’t do, our words, our attitudes. It can literally be anything. Sometimes Christians will get hung up on one or two pet sins and try to judge the whole world through that lens. That’s sin, too, although they don’t see it. Your parents’ choice was outside of God’s rules for healthy living. So was mine, to hate Harry when I found out what he’d done. So were some of the choices you’ve made. Nobody’s perfect. But God promises to forgive us when we ask, and to receive us as His own if we’ll accept Jesus as our Lord and Saviour.”
Ruth lifted the Bible from Amy’s hands and set it, still open, on the seat beside her. “Do you want me to get her for you?”
“I’ll go.” Amy stood. “I’m sorry to take so much of your time. If you need to leave, I’ll ask her to look up the verse at home.”
Light danced in Ruth’s eyes. “Are you kidding? I wouldn’t miss this for the world. You are so close to being adopted by the King of the Universe. He’s drawn up the agreement. It just needs your okay.”
The current of excitement in her voice tickled Amy’s waking hope. “I’ll be right back.”
As soon as Amy started toward Aunt Bay, the woman on the right touched Aunt Bay’s sleeve. She and her friend stepped back, and Michael’s aunt turned to Amy, gentle questions on her face.
Amy beckoned.
Aunt Bay spoke quickly with her friends, then hurried to Amy’s side. “I wasn’t ignoring you.”
“Yes, you were, and it nearly killed you.” Amy set her shoulders. “Ruth believes like you do, that God can forgive anything.”
“Wise woman.”
“She showed me a verse. I want you to see it. To see if it applies to me.” Amy’s feet braced and her knees bent, as if preparing to physically lift the weight of her secret. “I’m illegitimate. My father planted the seed and left.”
Aunt Bay swept her into a bone-crushing hug. “You silly, sweet child, God doesn’t care about your pedigree. He cares about you.”
Hope buzzed in Amy’s heart, like cicadas on a summer night.
Aunt Bay squeezed tighter, then released her. “Let’s check out this verse.”
They walked back to Ruth, and Amy introduced the two women. Aunt Bay shook Ruth’s hand. “Thank you for your message tonight. And thank you for talking sense to this precious child who won’t listen to an old lady.”
Amy slid her foot sideways to tap Aunt Bay’s. “Don’t play the age card. The truth is worse. I was afraid you were wrong.”
Aunt Bay sniffed. “I’m wounded.”
Ruth picked up her Bible. “Beatrice, did Amy tell you her background?”
“Just now.”
“So when I call God ‘Father to the Fatherless,’ based on Psalm 68:5, and I tell her that He adopts us into a new heritage that makes the old one irrelevant, what do you think?”
Aunt Bay ignored the outstretched Bible and focused on Amy. “It’s true, child. Jesus died — and lives — to save us all. Everyone who asks.”
“Even me.” Weight fell from Amy like a concrete cast that had broken. She looked from one woman to the other. “I’ve always believed in God, but thought His rules kept me out. How do I ask Him to accept me?”
Smiling, Ruth waved her Bible at Aunt Bay in a “you-lead” gesture. “You two have a history.”
Aunt Bay’s eyes glistened. “I — Amy, you’re a child of my heart and this can’t make me love you more, but I’m bursting with pleasure. You’re aware that God is holy and we can’t earn His acceptance.”
Amy nodded.
“And that you’re separated from Him by your own sins and imperfections, not just the circumstances of your birth?”
“Ruth explained that.”
“Do you believe that Jesus’ death and resurrection is enough to pay for your sin so that nothing will separate you from God the Father?”
“There’s a lot I don’t understand about that, but yes.”
Aunt Bay took her hand. “There’s a lot I still don’t understand. We’ll study together. For now, you need to invite Him into your life, to clean and adopt you. It means living His way, not yours, from now on. He’ll help you with that. Don’t worry about praying fancy. He knows your heart.”
Ruth joined hands with them and gave Amy’s an encouraging squeeze. “You can do this. He wants to say yes.”
Amy shut her eyes. “Hello, God? I believe Your words. I am fatherless. Will you be my Father?”
The pressure on Amy’s hands didn’t ease when she finished. Should she say something else? “Oh. Amen.”
Aunt Bay and Ruth took turns praying for her. Hope bloomed in Amy’s spirit, watered with words of love. Finally Aunt Bay said, “Amen.”
They dropped her hands, only to envelop her in hugs. Eventually, Ruth pulled away. “Will you keep in touch?”
“I’d like that.” Amy fished in her purse for one of the gallery’s cards. She wrote her name and cell number on the back. “I don’t always have my cell on, but the gallery number is good.”
Ruth took the card. “Oh, Stratton Gallery. We’ve been there, but not for years.”
Aunt Bay held out a scrap of paper and a pen. “We have an open house on Saturday, if you’d like to see Amy in her natural surroundings.”
Ruth wrote her contact information and handed it back. “I’ll see if Tony has plans. You’re near Peggy’s Cove, right? If it’s fine, we could stop at the restaurant for gingerbread.” She hugged them both. “One way or another, I’ll talk to you soon.”
She picked up her Bible and went back to her husband.
Aunt Bay nudged Amy. “We should get going, before Michael comes looking for us. He frets worse than an old woman.”
Amy fell into step beside her. Michael. “He’ll be so excited to hear this. Do we have to tell him what kept me away?”
“Child, it’s a non-issue. You need to believe that. Michael won’t care, but keeping secrets gives them power to poison us.”