August 2019
Golden Valley, Minnesota
At graveside, staring at the dark hole in the ground next to the gleaming casket, Sofia’s grief was unseated by something darker, deeper, with shadowed wings.
Hatred.
The murderous black rage she managed to keep at bay most of her life was surfacing. Stop! You are not like him. Stop!
But then the unleashed anger—the capacity for violence embedded deep in her blood and DNA that she had fought against her entire life—overcame her. As she stared at the casket that contained her flesh and blood, she gave that deep-seated fury full rein. Just like she wrote in that letter: she would kill whomever did this to Kate. Without hesitation.
Staring at the grave, she clenched her fists together. Open. Closed. Open. Closed. Looking down at her hands, once smooth and pretty, she realized they were starting to look like her mother’s hands: wrinkled, scattered with age spots, ugly. She stared down. No. She pushed down thoughts of her mother.
It was impossible.
But her mother’s words had always haunted her: You will pay.
Her mother was a terrible parent, but a murderer? No.
She had said Sofia would pay. But Sofia hadn’t believed her. And now she was paying with the one thing she had held most dear: her daughter’s life.
If the person who did this to her daughter magically appeared before her right now, even if it were her own mother or father, Sofia would wrap her hands around the lying murderer’s neck and crush the skin until she felt the spine crumble underneath. She would clench the neck as tight as she could, leaning and putting her entire body weight into it. She would not let go. Not if an army of men were trying to pull her off. She would hold on and tighten her grip. She would watch the murderer’s eyes bulge until they became lifeless. And she would never—not for a second—regret it.
Jason nudged her. It was time to say goodbye. Everyone else had placed a flower on Kate’s casket. It was her turn.
Clutching a single white daisy to her chest, Sofia slowly plodded toward the graveside, her legs feeling like tree stumps, her feet like anchors. She collapsed onto her knees in the dirt in front of the casket, unable to focus. She could feel the crowd part behind her, people leaving, giving her privacy. She knelt until her knees began to ache and the sun had fallen behind the trees. Jason cleared his throat behind her.
Leaning over, she kissed the cold metal and whispered. “Don’t worry, Kate. I will find whoever did this and make them pay. I swear to you, baby. I will make them pay.”