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JANINE GASPED. “WHAT did you say?”
Nelia started to cry in earnest. “It’s my fault you’re being followed by photographers and reporters. I told them about you.”
“You did?” Janine blinked, trying to understand. “But why? And how?”
“Because I discovered something going on between you and Dad. I saw it in your eyes that time in the restaurant in Dingle. You were fighting, but there was this thing in your eyes when you looked at each other.”
“What thing?”
“Love,” Nelia said angrily. “You looked angry but you still loved each other. I could tell. Don’t know how but I could.”
“Oh.”
“He wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you, he was supposed to fall for Rita,” Nelia wailed. “But then you had to go and ruin it all by flirting with him and make him fancy you.”
“I’m sorry. But I—” Janine didn’t know quite what to say. No use denying that there was something between her and Mick. “I didn’t plan it, you know,” she said softly. “I didn’t really flirt with him. It just happened. We...fell in love. I can understand that it would have been a little annoying for you, as you had other plans.”
“Yeah. It sure was. Then there was that trouble I got into when I used Dad’s phone to text Rita.”
“That was hardly my fault.”
Nelia sniffed. “No, but it made me so mad at you. Then Assumpta said that if we blew your cover, you’d have to leave.”
“And how did you achieve this?”
Nelia sniffed again and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. “I’m all snotty. Do you have a tissue?”
Janine dug in her pocket and found a crumpled tissue. “Here.”
“Thanks.” Nelia blew her nose noisily.
“So, go on, how did you do it?”
“Yeah, well, we didn’t know how to blow your cover. We didn’t know who you really were, only that you must have been famous in France or something. But then there was the photo shoot. I was allowed to watch after school, and then I met Michel, the French photographer. So I asked him if he knew of any famous people who had disappeared. He didn’t know what I meant but then we took that shot of you with Assumpta’s phone that night when you wore the red dress and sent it to him on Facebook.” Nelia drew breath and blew her nose again.
“Merde,” Janine whispered. “It didn’t take him long to spread the word.”
Nelia sighed. “I know. It was like opening one of those rubber dinghies. Once it blows up, you can’t get it back again. But Assumpta got all excited and started talking to those journalists about you. She was the one who said you were seducing all the men around here.”
“Not a nice thing to read. That was a nasty thing to do.”
Nelia started to cry again. “I know that now. I’m so sorry, Janine. I never wanted you to suffer. I just wanted you to go away for a bit. I’m sure you hate me now for what I did.”
Janine hugged her close. “I don’t hate you. I never could, sweetheart. But why did you suddenly feel so guilty you had to run away?”
“I didn’t at first. I was so angry with you,” Nelia sobbed. “But then, when you were talking to Megan and describing how it felt...like...rape, I realised what I had done. I heard in your voice how miserable you were. And it was all my fault. So then I decided to disappear. I couldn’t think of any other way or any other place.”
“But Nelia, did you really want to...kill yourself?”
“No, not really. I was just so ashamed. I wanted to hide. I thought that by the time I was found, you’d be gone and I wouldn’t have to face you.”
Janine pulled back and stared at Nelia through the gloom. “You thought I’d leave when you were missing? You thought I’d just pack my bags and go without trying to find you?”
Nelia sighed and blew her nose. “I don’t know. I was awake all night thinking about it. In the morning, I put on my jeans and my jacket and took my bike and just left. Megan didn’t even notice I wasn’t wearing my school uniform.”
“Oh. God.” Janine was going to chide her for running away and causing all this trouble. For risking her own life and that of others. For terrifying her father, who loved her more than his own life. For having the police and rescue service combing the countryside for her. But she thought Nelia felt bad enough without piling more guilt on top of what she had already suffered.
“When are they coming?” Nelia moaned. “I’m so cold. I can’t feel my hands or feet. It’s getting brighter so they might be on their way.”
“I’d say it’ll be another hour or so. It’s very foggy. The helicopter won’t be able to take off before it clears.”
Nelia started to shake uncontrollably. “I’m so cold,” she said, her teeth chattering. “I think I’m going ttto fffreeze to ddddeath...”
Janine rubbed Nelia’s back and arms. “Try to move.”
“How? I cccan’t ssstand up.”
“Move your arms. Make big circles. Like this.” Janine stood up in front of Nelia, circling her arms and rolling her shoulders. “Slap yourself. Like this.” Janine slapped her arms with her hands.
Nelia made a half-hearted attempt at moving but let her arms fall after a few seconds. “I can’t. It makes my leg hurt. But...” She stopped and listened. “You know what?”
“What?”
“I can hear something. An engine. It’s coming closer.”
Janine listened. Yes. She could hear the unmistakable sound of a helicopter. She looked up at the sky. The clouds had lifted. Thank God.
The sound of the helicopter became louder and louder, until it was quite deafening. Janine and Nelia put their hands over their ears. Janine looked around but saw nothing. Then Nelia pointed behind her. Janine turned around and watched in awe, as a big red helicopter appeared as if by magic, rising from behind the top of the mountain and hovering above them like a giant monster, creating a minor hurricane around them. Her hair whipping into her face, she fell to her knees, bursting into tears of relief. It was all over. They were safe.
-o-
Waking up in a hospital bed, Janine couldn’t remember much about the rescue. She had blacked out for a moment, and when she came to, she saw, as if in a dream, two men from the mountain rescue team, tending to Nelia. They stabilised her leg in an improvised splint, wrapped her in another foil blanket and put her on a stretcher which was winched up to the helicopter hovering above them. Then one of the men came back down and fetched Janine, attaching her to a harness and telling her to hold onto the wire. She remembered how terrifying it was: being lifted up in the air to the helicopter, closing her eyes tight, the wind pushing her sideways, and then the relief when she was pulled in by strong arms. She must have passed out again because she had no memory of the trip to nearby Kerry General Hospital, where Nelia was immediately seen by doctors. Mick appeared later while Janine was waiting on a trolley in a cubicle, wrapped in a blanket, drinking hot chicken soup.
Looking exhausted, he stood there watching her without speaking.
She looked up. “How is she?”
“She’ll be fine. No broken bones. But she’ll need surgery. Her Achilles tendon was severed. She’ll be in plaster for six weeks at least. They won’t operate until she’s recovered a bit. Right now they have to treat the hypothermia first. She’s having oxygen and intravenous fluids to get her body temperature up. They’ve given her a sedative so she won’t be in much pain. She’s asleep now.”
“Oh. Good.”
“She was blabbing something about having to hide because she was ashamed. She did something really shitty, she said. Her words. Do you know what she meant?”
Janine shrugged. “She was in shock. I had given her Paudie’s sloe gin to keep warm so that could have had an effect. She was probably confused.”
He pulled up a chair and sat down beside her trolley. “Paudie’s sloe gin?”
“Yes. I found a hip flask in the rucksack Megan lent me. It was full of that stuff. Strong but I thought it would warm us up.”
He nodded. “Good idea. Probably saved her life.” He paused. “No, you saved her life. If you hadn’t been mad enough to climb up there...”
She shuddered. “Don’t. I did and she’s going to be fine.”
“How about you?”
Janine smiled. “I’ll be fine.” She touched her tangled hair. “I must look awful.”
He looked at her, long and hard. “I have never seen you look more beautiful.”
“Ha, ha.” She was suddenly aware of her hospital gown. She tried to close it at the back but it was too much of an effort.
“Sure you’re all right?”
“No major injuries. My temperature was a bit low, but it’s going up, and I just have to stay warm and drink this dishwater they call soup. The nurse is coming to check my temperature and blood pressure, and then I can go home. Except my clothes are wet so I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“I’ll go to your house and get you dry clothes,” he offered.
“No. You have to stay here with Nelia. She’ll want you there when she wakes up.”
He put his hand on hers. “You really are cold. Your hands are like ice. You need to get them warm before you can even think of leaving. But where was I? Oh yes, Nelia. She’ll be asleep for a couple of hours at least. So I can look after you for a while.”
The warmth of his hand was so comforting, it brought tears to Janine’s eyes. She brushed them away. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to get weepy. And thanks. I’ll need dry clothes and then someone to take me to where my car is parked. Nelia’s bike’s there too.”
He shook his head. “No way. You’re going home and getting into bed. No driving around the countryside. If you give me your keys, I’ll get your car back for you. Paudie will drive me up there once I’m sure you’re home and comfortable. Or better still, you might stay with Megan until you feel better.”
Janine collapsed against the pillows. “Okay. You win. I don’t have the energy to argue.” She handed him the mug. “Here, put that on the table. I’ve had enough.”
He put the mug away. “Of course, there’s the problem of all those journalists camping on your doorstep, so to speak. Do you want to talk about that now? Or wait until you feel better?”
She played with the blanket, suddenly afraid to meet his eyes. “I suppose I should tell you my story. And I want to. But it’s long, so we might get interrupted by the nurse.”
“Whatever you feel like. But I don’t think the nurse will be here for a while.”
She looked at him. “All right. I’ll tell you.”
“Good.” He tried to take her hand.
She pulled it away. “You might not like some of it. But you need to know who and what I really am.”
He folded his arms. “Okay. I’m listening. And don’t leave anything out.”
“You won’t like me very much after this.”
“How do you know? I’m sure it can’t be that bad.”
Janine turned her head away. “It feels like it’s about someone else. I’ve changed a lot since those bad days.” She turned back to look at Mick and started to tell him her story.
-o-
Mick was silent for a long time after Janine had finished speaking. The noises in the emergency ward receded into the distance while she met Mick’s troubled gaze. “So now you know.”
Mick didn’t reply. It was quiet in the cubicle while all around them people rushed around. The voice on the public address system paged a doctor. A child called for his mother. Two nurses argued as they pushed a trolley past them, the wheels squeaking on the linoleum. Janine slumped against the pillows, exhausted. The cubicle felt suddenly claustrophobic and stuffy, the medicinal smells nauseating.
Mick cleared his throat. “That’s a hell of a story.”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know what to say. It sounds like some kind of trashy novel.”
Janine sat up. “Trashy?” She felt a surge of heat that started in her chest and went all the way to her brain. “Yes, I suppose you could say that. I’m cheap trash all right. Only good enough to screw, isn’t that right?” Angry tears stung as she glared at him. She didn’t know why his words angered her so much but the word ‘trashy’ had triggered a rage and a fear that he thought she was cheap in some way.
“No, that’s not what I—”
Janine’s rage increased as she saw the expression in his eyes, as if he found her ridiculous. “Yes, it was. I know what you’re thinking. It might as well be printed on your forehead.” She turned her head against the wall. “Please. Leave me alone. Just go.”
“But Janine—”
She grabbed her pillow. “Go, I said!” She threw the pillow at him, but he ducked, and it sailed into the corridor, narrowly missing an old lady in a wheelchair.
A male nurse appeared. “Please keep your voices down. There’re some very sick people here.”
“Sorry,” Janine mumbled. “I was just trying to get this man to leave.”
The nurse looked sternly at Mick. “The lady wants you to leave. I take it you’re not family?”
“No, I’m not,” Mick said. “I’ll go.” He glanced at Janine. “Let me know if you come to your senses.”
Janine replied with an ice-cold glare.
Mick shuffled out of the cubicle and down the corridor. Janine looked at his departing figure, knowing she had finally lost him.
-o-
“Blood pressure normal,” the nurse said. “But I don’t want you to go home yet. You need to rest. Get some sleep.”
Janine sighed. “I know but I can rest at home.”
“I still think you should stay for at least the rest of the day.”
“Here? But it’s so noisy. How could I possibly sleep?”
“I can get you a bed in the day ward. That’s where patients stay for minor surgery that doesn’t require an overnight stay. It’s not busy today and very quiet.”
Janine nodded. “Thank you. That sounds good. I can hardly keep my eyes open.”
“I’ll book you in there, then. Is there anyone who can get you some clothes this evening? The ones you were wearing are wet and caked with mud.”
“I have a friend who might be able to help. If you could get me my phone, I’ll give him a call. It’s in the pocket of my jacket.”
“It’s right here.” The nurse took Janine’s jacket from a chair.
Janine dug out her phone and dialled Brian’s number.
He answered immediately. “Brian Moriarty.”
“Hello, Brian. It’s Janine.”
“Janine! How lovely to hear from you. How are things? Are you still besieged?” His laughter was so cheery it made her feel instantly better.
“No. Yes. I don’t know. I’m in hospital. I’m fine, don’t worry. But I got into a situation where I seem to have lost my clothes.”
“What? Let me get this straight. You’re in hospital without any clothes. Sounds a little tricky.”
Janine giggled. “Yes. It is. But the bottom line is—”
“Don’t say ‘bottom’ to an old man when you’re naked. My heart can’t take that kind of excitement.”
“You’re not old. And there’s nothing wrong with your heart. I need your help.”
Brian adopted a more serious tone. “Right. Okay. Sorry about the jokes.”
“I loved the jokes. They cheered me up.”
“That’s good. Happy to bring any kind of cheer to your life, sweetheart. But you need clothes, I take it?”
“Yes. I can’t get out of here without them. And my car is stuck up the road to Caherconree.”
“Jesus, woman, you do get into the most interesting situations.”
“I know,” Janine chuckled. “Oh God, Brian, it’s so good to talk to you.”
“Likewise, sweetie pie. But if you want me to get you some clothes, we’d better get serious. I could go to Dunnes stores near the hospital and get you a pair of jeans, a tee-shirt and a warm sweater. That do you?”
“Perfect.”
“Underwear?”
“If you have the nerve, yes. Knickers, size twelve, bra 36 B.”
“Got it. Do I get to pick the colour?”
“Yes. Only because you’re so good.”
He laughed. “Good? No, that wouldn’t describe how I feel right now. But I’ll do my best.”
Janine laughed. “But you are. The best friend ever. I’m going to get some sleep now on nurse’s orders. I’ll be in the day ward, so if you could pick me up here around four o’clock, I’ll be ready to leave.”
“Will do. See you then. Sweet dreams, darlin’.”
Janine hung up with a smile. Brian always made her feel good. So different from Mick. Never demanding or judgemental but always helpful and understanding. Brian never minded her temper tantrums or her mood swings. He was never angry or accusing. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to spend one’s life with a man like that, who never stopped giving? His voice had made her relax, and when she finally settled into the bed in the blissfully quiet day ward, she fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
