Vanessa smiled, secretly wishing the same thing, but decided to keep her thoughts to herself. She wasn’t ready for these new, tender feelings. They frightened her, caused her to feel vulnerable to him, something she didn’t welcome. She certainly wasn’t prepared to share her emotions with Ralph. Nor was she ready to examine them closely herself.
After placing a playful kiss on the tip of his nose, she began hunting for her clothes. Ralph lay with his hands behind his head, a huge smile on his face. She turned and caught him watching her.
Hands on her hips, she said, “What are you doing?”
“Enjoying the view,” he teased.
“A little too much.” She couldn’t help noting the way his sex was hardening, then blushed.
“Little?” He lifted a brow.
“I didn’t mean!” she hastily said, then covered her face with her hands. It was difficult enough dressing with him watching her, but to discuss his impressive proportions!
Laughing, Ralph rose to his full height.
“It’s not that funny!” she said from over her shoulder as she fumbled with her bra clasp.
He pushed her hand away and did it for her. When he finished, he swept her hair away from her nape and kissed it. Rather than turning toward him, she picked up her dress. She stepped into it, smoothing it down her hips and thighs. With her panties wadded in her hand and her purse under her arm, she turned toward him. She was surprised to see he was also dressing.
“Be right back.” Before she could rush off, he cupped her shoulders. “There are fresh towels and soap in the vanity. Toss the towels in the hamper when you are done.” At her look of shock, he shrugged. “My aunt. She explained that even a bachelor should have certain things in his powder room for his female guests.”
“Powder room?” she teased, and smiled at his embarrassment.
Vanessa decided she would choose to be grateful to his aunt rather than jealous of the other females he’d entertained. In his wine-colored half bath, she found everything she needed, a stack of cream hand towels, minisoaps, and some things she didn’t need, small tubes of toothpaste, toothbrushes, tampons, condoms, and a small first-aid kit. She recalled how well stocked his dressing rooms in the pool area had been. But this was different. Or maybe she was different because she cared.
When she returned, he was completely dressed, including sandals, and was standing in the foyer, where he picked up a set of keys. Her curiosity got the better of her.
“Going out?”
“Yeah.” He smiled. “I’m going to follow you home. Want to make sure my lady gets home safely. You did make sure your alarm was on when you left the house?”
“Of course.” She lifted her chin.
“Ready?”
She nodded. He ushered her outside. After locking the door behind him, he walked her to her car and held the door for her.
Before he could close it, she said, “You really don’t have to go through so much trouble. I’m fine…really.”
He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss on her lips. “I plan to make sure that you stay fine, beautiful.” He closed the door, and then jogged to his Jaguar, parked a few yards away.
As she waited for him, she couldn’t help grinning. She understood as never before why women found him so downright irresistible. The brother was not only smooth, but an incredible and unselfish lover. His priority had been to pleasure her to the utmost degree. Evidently, he could write a how-to book on making a woman feel cherished since he had done that and then some.
Was it any wonder women chased him down? Despite her inexperience, there wasn’t a doubt in her mind that he knew his way around a woman’s body. He’d actually made her toes curl.
She was humming as she drove home, aware of the way her body still purred from the sweet loving he’d given her.
Vanessa wasn’t surprised when Ralph got out of his car and linked hands to walk her up to the front door, where she had left the porch light on.
Holding her close, Ralph asked, “What are we, Nessa? Friends or lovers?”
Smiling, she said, “Both.”
Ralph grinned. His kiss wasn’t long but was indeed sweet.
Close to her ear, he reminded her that he was flying out of town on business and wouldn’t be back until Monday. Then he said, “I’m going to miss you. Would you and the kids have dinner with me Monday evening?”
She smiled at him and nodded. Then she playfully bit his bottom lip before she licked the hurt tenderly and kissed him again. At his husky groan, she smiled and whispered bye. Hurrying inside, she locked the door behind her.
As she leaned back against it, she let out a weary sigh. It was very late, and she was tired. But that wasn’t what caused her to sigh. She was new to this game they were playing, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t going in blindfolded. They agreed to be both friends and lovers. She assured herself that as long as she was careful and didn’t yearn for more, she would be fine. The danger came from being greedy…wanting it all. Love had no place in their agreement. Nope! It was the sure way of getting a huge dose of heartache.
She hadn’t realized until now, but Ralph had been the perfect choice for her. He was no more interested in that four-letter word than she was. Vanessa fell asleep with a smile.
Saturday mornings were often lazy, with no need to rush anywhere. The twins liked to curl up on the living-room rug in front of the television and watch cartoons. Lana liked to sleep late, and no one bothered her until eleven. Vanessa also liked to stay in bed only with her sketch pad, working on new ideas.
Although she’d slept well, Vanessa had dreamed…dreamed of a fabulous wedding…her wedding. Her entire family had been there. Rather than focus on the fact that Ralph was her groom, she concentrated on creating the spectacular wedding gown.
It was beautiful in its simplicity. The gown had to be made in raw silk that would ripple when she moved. It had clean, straight lines with an off-the-shoulder design. An inch-wide trim of seed pearls and tiny cream silk-ribbon-embroidered rose buds saved the bodice from looking too plain. The long, tight sleeves were sheer, but the cuffs were also covered in seed pearls. Her hair had been pinned up in an elaborate French twist, and the sheer veil was anchored by a row of cream roses.
As Vanessa stared at the drawing, she decided she’d never seen anything more beautiful. This gown, to do it justice, had to be embroidered by hand. It was a shame she’d never have a reason to make it.
For years, Vanessa had dreamed of wedding gowns but never one for herself. Rather than examine her emotions, she flipped the page and began designing a deep green silk, one she envisioned her sister would wear to her prom.
Knocking briefly on the open door, “Hi,” Lana said, around a yawn. “Busy?”
“Nope, did you sleep well?” She smiled.
“Mmm-hmm, “Lana stretched as she crossed the room to sit on the end of the bed. Leaning her back against the footboard, Lana said, “What happened? Did you and Ralph make up?”
Vanessa didn’t look up from the pad. “Yes, not that it’s any of your business, Miss Nosy.”
Lana laughed. “Good. Are we going over there to swim later? Because if it’s okay with Ralph, I’d like to invite Marisa to join us.”
“Not today. Ralph has gone away on business. He won’t be back until Monday. We’re on our own this weekend.” She tapped her chin as if in thought. “I bet I can come up with lots of things that need to be done. You and the twins can clean your rooms. There’s laundry to do, the kitchen and bathrooms are in need of cleaning. Take your pick.”
Just then, the twins ran in and jumped into bed on either side of her.
“Nessa!” Lana complained. “I’d hoped to visit with Marisa this weekend.”
“That’s fine. If everyone pitches in, we should be done with the house by four. Why don’t you call and invite her to dinner? If her folks say it’s okay, she can stay over and go to church with us.”
Lana jumped up and hugged her. “Thanks, sis. I’ll go call. Can we make our own pizzas?”
Vanessa smiled. “Sure.”
Lana called, “Thanks,” while racing for the stairs.
“Can I have pineapple-and-ham pizza?” Curtis asked. Evidently the only part of conversation that interested him was the food.
“Anyone with toys and clothes on the floor or unmade beds can’t want pizza. That also goes for anyone still in their pajamas,” she said with a straight face.
“That’s not fair!” Courtney insisted.
“Sure, it is. I want pizza for dinner, so I’d better get moving.” Vanessa pushed back the cotton blanket.
“Me too!” Curtis yelled, jumping up and running for the stairs. Courtney looked at her sister for a moment, then took off after her twin.
As she showered and dressed, Vanessa was proud of the fact she hadn’t wasted time reviewing the previous night or worrying about what was said afterwards. What was the point? They decided what was best for them. No one else’s opinion mattered. Vanessa was not fooling herself. More than likely, Ralph would be the first to look elsewhere. And it had nothing to do with her. It was simply his way, which would be fine with her.
This way there would be no surprises. She knew what she was up against. She knew her man. That was how her mother made her first mistake. She’d underestimated Greg Cummingham. Her second mistake, Leah had fallen deeply in love with him. Those two blunders had cost her everything. She gave him her power and left her heart open to hurt and devastation. Unfortunately, her mother never recovered from Cummingham’s callousness.
Vanessa was confident that wouldn’t happen to her. She had her eyes wide open. Ralph was not her weakness. For now, he brought her pleasure. And that was enough. She wasn’t deceiving herself by trying to make “for now” last. She wasn’t looking for “forever.”
That didn’t mean she wasn’t looking forward to seeing him on Monday evening. In fact, she was sorry that she had not suggested they go out alone. So what if she was feeling selfish and wanted to keep him to herself. It was ridiculous, considering her family always came first with her. Oh, well, she shrugged.
However long Ralph’s infatuation lasted, it would be enough. When it ended, she wasn’t going to self-destruct. They’d go back to being just friends, with no regrets for either of them.
Although her workday had been no more hectic than usual, Vanessa rushed in the door somewhat breathlessly. She had less than an hour to get ready for the evening ahead.
“Where is everyone?” Vanessa called.
“In the kitchen,” Lana called back. “We’ve had our showers, so the coast is clear.”
Vanessa smiled. She hoped that meant there would still be some hot water. “No more than a snack. I don’t want you all to spoil your dinner,” she said as she walked into the kitchen.
The twins rushed to give her a welcoming hug. To save time, she’d laid out their things before she had left for work. She wanted things to run smoothly.
“There’s a letter for you from an attorney’s office.” Lana sent her a questioning glance when she entered the kitchen.
“I left it in your room.”
Not having a clue to what it might be about, Vanessa nodded. “Okay thanks.” She hurried into her room, undressed, and put her hair in hot rollers. In her robe, she rushed into the bathroom.
She showered, did her makeup, styled her hair, then dressed in white jeans and the off-the-shoulder top she’d worn while they were in Atlanta. She’d picked it because of the wonderful memories associated with the trip.
It wasn’t until she lotioned her hands that she remembered the letter. Vanessa recognized the prominent law firm. A glance at the bedside clock assured her, she had ten minutes before Ralph was due. She could spare a few moments before she had to check on the kids.
Opening the envelope, she was more curious than alarmed when she began reading the legal papers. Her hands were shaking and her eyes filled with tears by the time she reached the bottom of the document.
“Nessa! Ralph is here!” Curtis yelled.
“Coming.” She dried the tears, did a last-minute touch-up, then put the letter into the envelope and hid it in the bottom of her lingerie drawer.
“Sorry to keep you waiting,” she said with a forced smile.
Ralph’s eyes momentarily locked with hers. “No problem.” He met her in the center of the living room and after kissing her cheek, he unknowingly gave her what she needed most, a hug. If he was surprised that she clung for a moment too long, he didn’t show it. “You look nice.”
“Thanks. Everyone ready?” Vanessa give each child a once-over, then finger combed Courtney’s bangs, straightened Curtis’s collar, and smoothed the back of Lana’s blouse.
“Where are we going?” Curtis and Courtney asked eagerly.
Ralph smiled, “That’s up to your beautiful sisters.”
“Why?” Curtis demanded.
Ralph chuckled, “When they are happy, we’re happy. Vanessa? Lana? Courtney?”
The ladies looked at each other, then said at once, “The Olive Garden.”
Ralph whispered to Curtis. He nodded and hurried over to the screen door and held it open for the ladies. The last to leave, Vanessa handed Ralph her door key as she passed. After locking up, Ralph ushered them down the walk.
When Vanessa went to get Curtis and Courtney’s booster seats, he stopped her. “No, need. There is nothing for you to worry about. I took care of everything.” He squeezed her waist as he urged her toward his gleaming Navigator. He helped her into the front seat, then went to check that the twins were buckled into a brand-new set of booster seats and Lana was strapped into the middle seat.
“We all set?” Ralph asked as he slid into his seat.
“Yes.” Vanessa, touched by his forethought in regard to her family, blinked back tears. Aw, oh, tears signal emotional distress. Not good. She knew she had to be cautious. She was feeling too much, which made her vulnerable.
Ralph could be all charm. Not that she thought he would take advantage, but she was used to being in control. Tonight, she was a very long way from that. If anything, she was close to collapsing, and she didn’t want that. She was so darn needy. She should have come up with an excuse and stayed home and locked herself inside her room until she had time to pull herself together.
The popular family restaurant was crowded. Even though it was a weeknight, the place was packed. The twins weren’t fussy eaters, but their favorite food outside of hamburgers was spaghetti and meatballs with lots of cheese.
Vanessa did her best to hold on to her composure, asking Ralph about his trip. Deep in thought, she picked at the food in front of her. When Ralph asked if something was wrong, she shook her head. Aware of his silent inquiry she reached beneath the table for his hand and slipped hers into one of his, then whispered, they would talk later. He nodded his understanding, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze.
Relieved that the children were busy laughing and teasing each other, Vanessa concentrated on holding on to her smile. It took every bit of her control to succeed. She released a weary sigh when everyone settled on hot-fudge sundaes for dessert.
“What is it?” Ralph whispered into her ear, as they walked hand in hand to the car.
“I’ll explain when we’re alone.” When she attempted to move out of his reach he held on to her.
She looked up at him in surprise when he said, “It’s not us, is it?”
She shook her head. She was trembling so hard that she needed his support as he helped her into the car. She blinked back tears of stunned dismay. Suddenly, she realized she didn’t have a single doubt that Ralph would be there for her in the coming weeks. All she had to do was ask for his help. The question was, did she have the courage to ask? Or would she let her fear of repeating her mother’s mistakes prevent her from reaching out to him? This wasn’t Ralph’s problem. It was hers. In the end, she had to do what was best for her family. If only she was certain what that was.
After the children thanked Ralph for dinner, she asked wearily, “I’ve got to go up and get the kids settled. It shouldn’t take long. Can you…”
“I’m not going anywhere until I find out what has you so upset.” Caressing her cheek with a finger, he smiled. “Take your time. I’ll be out on the back sunporch.”
“Okay.” She hurried up the stairs. It took less time than she expected to get the twins ready for bed. After tucking them in, she left Lana soaking in a tubful of bubbles reading a romantic novel.
Vanessa stopped in her room to retrieve the letter she’d casually opened a few hours earlier. Now she felt as if her world were crashing in around her. She hesitated on the threshold, wondering if she was wrong to share this with Ralph. She sighed; if she didn’t, she might explode. Ralph was her friend and she badly needed a friend.
Ralph relaxed on one end of the swing, his long legs stretched out in front of him.
He’d switched on the floor lamp in the corner.
“Would you care for a drink?” She braced a hand on the doorjamb. Her stomach was a mass of nerves.
“I’m good.” He patted the cushion beside him. “Sit with me…please.”
Vanessa, who was so close to crumbling and feared she’d end up in a heap of inconsolable sobs, didn’t argue. She went over and gave him the letter. “Read this. Then we’ll talk.”
“This was what stole your smile all evening?”
“Yes. The instant I saw Gregory Cummingham’s name, I knew we were in serious trouble.”
“Gregory Cummingham?”
“The twins’ father. Just read it.” When he finished, she whispered, “What am I going to do? I can’t believe I am telling you this, but you want to be my friend. So friend, tell me what to do. I can’t afford a high-priced attorney.”
Vanessa shouldn’t have been surprised by how fast he moved; after all, the man had been a professional basketball player. She was in his arms, her cheek against his chest before she could ask for what she needed…she craved his strength and support.
“What you’re not going to do is hand over custody of the twins,” he snarled furiously as he held her tenderly, his hand gently moving over her shoulders and back.
Vanessa did just what she’d tried to avoid, she cried scalding-hot tears she’d held in all through dinner. Beneath it all was the overwhelming fear that if she wasn’t extremely careful, she’d lose the twins.
“Go ahead. Let it out, beautiful,” he soothed. “He won’t win. I promise.”
Vanessa cried harder, then gradually calmed, enough to form a coherent thought. Finally, she said, “How can I stop him? He’s not only filthy rich, he’s a powerful criminal attorney. And he really is the twins’ father.” She sniffed.
Ralph’s brow creased in concern. “No doubts?” he asked as he passed her a tissue.
“None,” Vanessa said, unhappily, as she mopped at the steady stream of tears. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to break down like that.”
“You have nothing to apologize for, beautiful.” Reaching for her hand, he led Vanessa back over to the swing. They sat side by side, with Ralph’s arm draped around her shoulders.
“I’m missing the facts. Tell me about Cummingham. All I know is that he takes on high-profile cases and usually wins. And he recently married a TV journalist.”
Vanessa released a tired sigh. “That’s right. When my mother met him at her office, she was a legal assistant. He wasn’t married then. In fact, he swore he’d never marry.” She paused, then explained, “My mother, Leah, had been a housewife until our father died from a sudden heart attack three years earlier. She was forced to go back to the work she’d done before she married.
“While he was busy seducing her, he never bothered to tell her he was a womanizing cheat. He ended up not only breaking her heart, but her spirit as well. She loved him. And how did he repay her devotion? When she told him she was pregnant, he ran out on her and never looked back.”
Ralph kissed Vanessa’s forehead. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”
“Yeah, me too. My mother was ashamed of being pregnant without a husband. Can you imagine how she felt? Used, degraded, and, most important, the love she so cherished was one-sided.” Vanessa bit her lip. “She was devastated. That’s when Lana and I lost her.” She broke down, sobbing.
“Shush, beautiful. You don’t have to explain.” Ralph tightened his arms around her, but as quickly as he brushed them away, more tears welled up in her dark eyes.
“I want to tell you. I want you to understand what kind of man Greg Cummingham is. Everyone thinks he’s such a wonderful man because he’s done so much for the black community. Well, he wasn’t wonderful to my mother. He ended up destroying her. She didn’t want to live, not for me or Lana, and not for the babies. Yes, there were problems with the pregnancy, but that’s not why she died. She gave up, Ralph.”
The tears came, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t stop them. She had no idea how long the emotional storm lasted, but Ralph held her through it all. Drained, she slumped against him, exhausted.
Unfortunately, Greg Cummingham was still the twins’ biological father, and he was seeking full custody. Yet Vanessa felt better, even stronger. And she knew the change in her had everything to do with Ralph’s support.
For some reason, Cummingham wanted the twins. She would have to fight to keep them. But she would not be facing him alone.