Lexie knew, almost from the outset of Josh’s ‘theory’, that he was talking about her brother. It all added up; the time frame, the station, the nickname, the event. And although she couldn’t have known what he was about to say, she had tried to anticipate the sting, had sought to prepare for the impact of his words.
It hadn’t worked. Lexie felt like she’d been punched in the face.
Swallowing the massive lump in her throat, she struggled to consider the implications.
Josh looked mortified at the anguish he was causing her and had turned deathly pale
Not knowing what else to do, Lexie pushed herself off the lounge and took the photo of her brother from the wall in the hallway. A pair of brown eyes, just like her own, stared back at her, and for a split second the sense of loss and desolation was as intense as when it had first happened. Oh Lincoln, how I miss you.
It was strange, she thought, how time blurred some memories of the dead; their physical features, their voice might become a little hazy in the mind’s eye, but the emotional pain of their departure could still remain as sharp and fresh as ever.
Sitting down next to Josh, Lexie handed him the framed photo. He took it from her and she saw that his eyes were welling up.
‘I can’t believe it. I’m so sorry.’
‘It’s all right,’ Lexie told him, finding the need to reassure him took precedence over her own feelings.
‘How have we not met before? How did I not know who you were?’
He seemed angry at himself for his ignorance. ‘I was at the funeral, I don’t remember . . . I spoke to your mother and father. I don’t remember seeing you. I would remember you.’
‘It was two years ago and there were five or six hundred people at the funeral, Josh.’
It had been a full police extravaganza, with a guard of honour. As a mark of respect for their fallen comrade police had lined the streets leading from the church for what seemed like miles. She remembered examining their faces. Some had tears rolling freely down their cheeks, others struggled to remain stoic, as they saluted the funeral procession when it passed by. When a cop got killed it affected them all. Although it had been incredibly sad, very surreal and overwhelming, there were moments where she’d felt exceedingly proud of the respect shown to her brother by his peers, some of whom had never even met him. If there was one thing the police department could do well, it was an impressive funeral.
‘I was married. We split up a year ago but I kept my married name, only because it’s easier not to go through the process of changing all the documents.’
Josh stared at her with wide eyes, clearly surprised at this news.
‘Everyone knows me as Rogers now, so there’s no link there. Were you at the inquest?’
He shook his head.
‘No. I didn’t handle Lincoln’s death well at all. I took six months’ long service leave and went overseas. It’s a character flaw, I’m afraid. When the going gets tough the not so tough take off,’ he stated flatly. ‘I wasn’t around for the inquest.’
He stared at the picture of her brother, then glanced at Lexie.
‘You have the same eyes. Now I know why you looked familiar to me.’
Lexie nodded in agreement, doing her best to hold the tears that were threatening at bay.
There was a knock at the door. They both stared at it as though expecting it to open on its own.
‘It must be the takeaway I ordered,’ Lexie said, jumping off the lounge.
She paid the courier and quickly placed the food in the kitchen.
‘If you’re hungry, I ordered plenty,’ she told him, coming back into the living room and sitting on the lounge opposite him.
He didn’t reply. His eyes remained on the floor.
Lexie reached forward, plucked her glass from the coffee table and took a large sip as she regarded Josh, who hadn’t moved. It was hard to comprehend that Burgh, a fellow cop, could have intentionally failed to prevent her brother from being shot, for his own selfish reasons. The thought that he may have set the whole thing up, orchestrated her brother’s murder . . . That was just too shocking to fully comprehend.
Surely Josh’s dislike for the man was clouding his judgement, Lexie reasoned. Then again, anything was possible. There were plenty of ex-police rotting away in their protected cells, behind prison walls, doing time for a diversity of crimes, all unbefitting a police officer.
Taking a deep breath, Lexie became aware of a slow burning working its way into a tight spasm in her gut. Like a vampire’s thirst for blood, an all-consuming hunger for the truth was taking form in the depths of her soul. Did this explain her aversion to Burgh? Was her gut instinct telling her something? Or, under the circumstances, was it perfectly acceptable for her to privately condemn the man who, as Lincoln’s partner, should have had his back at all times?
She realised she was becoming lost in her own thoughts and tried to clear her mind. It was too much to process. Besides, she was getting increasingly worried about Josh, who’d looked frozen in horror since learning about Lincoln. He seemed to be almost catatonic, and it was starting to scare her. Lexie slipped from her seat and onto her knees in front of him, shaking him gently by the shoulders.
Josh finally looked at her but his gaze didn’t connect, it travelled through her.
A shiver of apprehension shot down her spine. She felt her own heart quicken. Don’t collapse on me again . . . Trying to keep the shrill of panic from her voice, she cried, ‘Josh, Josh? Are you all right?’
He didn’t answer.
—
A time bomb was ticking in Josh’s chest. It was getting consistently louder and seemed ready to explode. He was deeply upset. Lexie had endured so much. She had tragically lost her brother, and he had just now all but accused another cop, a member of their office, of being responsible for his death. She must be in complete shock. He couldn’t begin to imagine what thoughts would be running rampant in her head, yet here she was, composed and in control, comforting him when it should be the other way around.
How can you be so strong, so resilient, Lexie Rogers?
Her beautiful face came into focus. She was right in front of him, lines of concern creasing her otherwise perfect forehead. As their eyes locked, the rush of emotion he felt left him with no time to think, to analyse or even consider his actions. It was as though their shared shock and grief had united them in a way nothing else could. He could feel the electric current pass between them, so charged with sexual energy he could almost hear it crackle through the air.
Slowly he closed the small space between them. Her face tilted upwards to meet his lips as if it was the most natural thing in the world to do. The kiss was tentative at first but deepened quickly. She tasted of wine and smelt like apple shampoo. The combination was delicious, he decided, threading his hands through her hair and pulling her closer into him.
Lexie responded by circling her arms around his neck, letting her tongue have free rein to explore his mouth. The feeling was intense, heady, overpowering. The kiss was passionate, and was playing havoc with his self-control. The last few nights he’d spent dreaming about her, imagining her in his arms, exactly like this. His emotions were threatening to push him over the edge and Josh didn’t want to appear like an eager teenager unable to control his raging hormones.
Pulling back, breaking the contact, he gulped in a breath of air, attempting to find relief from the magnetic pull of her body and calm the violent thumping of his heart. Gazing into her eyes, he could see the reflection of his face and the passion he was betraying. She gave him a little smile. It was all the encouragement he needed.
He moved further forward on the lounge until he was perched on its edge. Lexie was now kneeling upright, intimately placed between his legs. Wrapping his arms around her waist, Josh trailed hot kisses across her cheek, down her throat, and along her shoulder. He noticed goose bumps break out over her skin. She giggled; a sensuous, wanton sound that drove him wild with desire. The room started to spin, pushing everything off balance. The feel of Lexie was intoxicating, addictive, in the way alcohol could never be.
‘Tickles,’ she whispered breathlessly, her voice husky and deeper than normal. ‘But don’t stop,’ she pleaded.
He would find it hard to deny her anything, he thought to himself, as his lips made their way back to her mouth. When she kissed him back with an urgency that surprised them both, his heart went into a gallop.
Josh slid from the lounge, never losing contact with her lips, and pulled her to the floor on top of him. Melting into his body, Lexie let out a small moan. He growled in response, pushing the coffee table out of the way with one arm, while rolling her onto her back on the rug next to them.
Bending over her on hands and knees, he slowly, tentatively, advanced downwards towards her, giving her plenty of time to protest.
‘Is this going too fast, Lexie?’
In response she wrapped her hands around the back of his neck and pulled him down to her. Their mouths and bodies fused together in an explosion of passion that went on and on. Pressed intimately together, with every cavity between them filled, and only clothing keeping them apart, their hips rocked in unison. His hardness against the softness between her legs sent skyrockets of desire to every part of his body. If this wasn’t heaven, Josh thought, he didn’t know what was, and he wondered how much longer he could maintain his self-control.
His breathing was too quick, coming in short gasps, and his heart was pounding too fast as he made his way down her body. Lifting her singlet top, he found her breasts, brought his mouth down around an erect nipple and sucked gently. Lexie arched her back, let out a strangled cry of pleasure and whispered, ‘I want you now, Josh. Don’t make me wait.’
Oh God. There was no turning back now.
—
Lexie’s head was spinning. All thoughts of Amitt Vincent, threatening text messages, her brother, or Harry Burgh were instantly discarded when Josh kissed her breasts. The sensation was so incredible, so powerful, that it sent a current of pleasure to every nerve-ending in her body. Her back arched, her fingers dug into his shoulders and she was unable to stop herself from crying out.
‘Oh God, Josh,’ she gasped, hardly recognising her raspy voice.
How long could she stand this erotic torment? His hands were everywhere at once, tracing the outline of her body. His hot lips devoured her, skimming over her skin, his kisses scorching her stomach, her hips. Every inch of her was on fire, aching, tingling with anticipation. Her stomach tightened and her breath came in tiny gasps as waves of passion consumed her.
Josh moved back up her body, his lips urging her on with delicate, persistent nibbles. The pounding of her heart was deafening in her ears and the inconsistent rhythm of their ragged breathing, the sensual sound of their lips moving in synchronisation, was too much. It was sensory overload.
Lexie found herself fumbling with his shirt. Josh broke away from her just long enough for them both to discard unwanted clothing. Naked, with his body silhouetted in the dim light, he knelt over her. Lexie’s eyes devoured his perfectly sculpted masculine form and although his face was hidden in shadow, she sensed his smile.
Unable to see his mouth move, she heard him ask again, ‘Are you sure about this?’
‘I’m sure,’ she replied, reaching for him, unable to wait any longer.
Then he was kissing her again, a deep lustful kiss that went on and on until both of them were left gasping for air but unable to break the contact. His hands were in her hair, on her breasts, between her legs, his expert fingers knowing just how to touch her to make her ache with longing. When she couldn’t take it any longer, she locked her legs around his waist invitingly; he reacted instantly, sensing her need.
‘You are so beautiful, Lexie. I want you so much.’
He hovered over her before slowly lowering himself into her, penetrating her very core, filling every gap between them.
She cried out as he entered her. Nothing could have prepared her for the ecstasy of that first thrust, and she clung desperately to his shoulders, running her hands down his taut back and tilting her hips skywards.
Josh moved slowly at first, teasing her, enjoying the thrill of discovery. It seemed they fitted perfectly, like two pieces of a puzzle, Lexie thought, hearing herself moan out loud. Though it wasn’t long before the urgency began to build, and their gentle rocking turned into something more frantic. Ripples of pleasure rushed through her as his movements quickened and he surged into her, thrusting hard and deep, over and over again.
She matched his rhythm, lost in pure sensation, frenzied kisses and cries of ‘Oh God’. She grabbed the muscles of his back, digging her fingers in, bracing herself against the building tide as a current of pleasure carried her over the edge. At the peak of release, Lexie let out a strangled cry of delight as the room exploded around her.
A heartbeat later Josh’s face contorted, almost as if he was in pain, and he drove himself into her for the final time. Letting out a primal groan, his entire body trembled and then shuddered, before collapsing into her arms.