Chapter Fifteen

“Jeremy,” Thea called as she came down the stairs the next morning. “Have you a moment?”

Jeremy, standing by the door, turned. “Not just now, Thea. I have to see one of my tenants about something.”

“Oh.” Thea crossed to him, ignoring the impatient way he shifted from one foot to another. What she had to say to him was important and could not be put off much longer. Already she had been here several days, and she hadn’t told him her news. “I need to talk to you about something.”

“About Gillian?”

“No, something else. But it can wait.” She wasn’t about to tell him now, while he was so obviously eager to be off. “When you come back?”

“This afternoon, after luncheon. Is that acceptable?”

“Fine.” Thea followed him out onto the drive, where a groom stood, holding Lightning. “I had a letter from my brother, by the way. He has some questions about the stud and he’s going to come here for a few days. If that’s all right with you.”

“Of course.” Jeremy leaped into the saddle, and Lightning, catching his impatience, danced a few steps. “I like your brother. I’ll see you at luncheon, Thea.”

“Yes, Jeremy.” Thea stepped back and watched him gallop down the drive. That was Jeremy, taking everything at full speed. She wondered how he would react when she told him her news.

“Thea,” a voice said to her right, and she turned to see Gillian. “Is he gone?”

“Yes, quite.” Thea held her hand out to the little girl. “Didn’t you want to see your father?”

“I don’t like his horse.” Gillian smiled trustingly up at her. “I went to the kitchen to see Snowball,” she went on, linking her hand with Thea’s. “May we walk down to the beach?”

“Of course.” Their daily walks had become a ritual each enjoyed. “I’d like to stop at the stables first.”

“All right,” Gillian said, if reluctantly, and Thea reflected that she’d made some progress. Gillian’s fear of horses hadn’t abated, but in the last few days Thea had managed to coax her into going into the stables. That the child still kept her distance wasn’t as important as the trust growing between them, which was why Thea allowed Gillian to use her name, much to Mrs. Powell’s disapproval. “Are you going to check on your horses?”

“No, I want to see old Polly. I’ve an apple for her. Follett thinks she won’t be with us much longer, poor old thing.”

“My mother used to ride Polly,” Gillian volunteered, and Thea took a quick look at her. Gillian rarely talked about her mother. “But she didn’t like her.”

“No?”

“She said Polly was too slow. She liked fast horses.” Gillian fell quiet, her eyes blinking rapidly, and Thea thought it better not to comment.

“Well. Here we are. I’ll just give Polly her apple, and we may go to the beach. Hello, old girl.” Thea stopped in front of Polly’s stall and the horse, an old piebald, loped over, snuffling at Thea’s hand. “How are you today, girl?”

“Her teeth are awfully big,” Gillian commented, watching as Thea fed the horse the apple.

“Well, horses are big animals. Yes, you’re a good girl,” Thea said, stroking the horse’s nose. “Your nose feels like velvet.”

“May I feel?”

Thea turned in surprise. “Of course,” she said, managing to keep her voice normal. “Here, bring that stool over and you may stand on it. There. What do you think?”

Gillian hesitantly reached out a hand to touch the horse, drawing back when Polly snuffled inquiringly in her direction. “Why does she do that?”

“It’s her way of saying hello.”

“Oh.” Gillian reached out again, and this time her hand stayed where it was, carefully stroking the horse’s nose, even when Polly turned toward her.

“I’ve a bit of apple left,” Thea said softly, after a few minutes. “Would you like to feed it to her?”

“All right.” Gillian took the apple and held it out, snatching it back when Polly’s teeth got a bit too close. “That tickles!” she exclaimed, as the horse took the apple.

“See? Polly likes you.”

“Do you think so?” Gillian turned back to the horse, who was watching her through liquid brown eyes. “She’s a nice old horse, aren’t you, girl?”

“So she is,” Thea said briskly, hiding the tangle of emotions she felt, triumph, joy, compassion, and just a little anxiety. She had succeeded in breaking through some of Gillian’s fear, and that meant that soon her task would be accomplished. She would have no reason to stay, unless she told Jeremy about the baby. Putting her hand on her stomach, she steeled herself against the swift upsurge of nervousness. Of course she was going to tell Jeremy. It was simply turning out to be harder than she’d expected. Suppose he didn’t want to break his engagement to Evadne? What would she do then?

“Thea? May we go to the beach now?”

Thea took a deep breath. “Of course. Say goodbye to Polly.”

“All right.” Gillian looked back at Polly, and then, with a surprising show of reluctance, climbed down from the stool. “Good-bye, old girl.”

“We’ll come to see Polly tomorrow,” Thea promised, taking Gillian’s hand as they went out.

“And may we take her another apple? She likes apples, doesn’t she, Thea?”

“So she does. Now, I wonder who that is,” she said, as a post chaise came down the drive.

“Are we having visitors?” Evadne, dressed for riding, walked toward them. “Stanton might have told me.”

“I think it might be—yes, it is. My brother, Miss Powell.”

“Your brother!”

“Yes. He’s been managing the stud farm for me while I’m here, but he has some questions. Francis.” Thea went forward, smiling, aware that Evadne was trailing behind her. “How good to see you. Are things really that bad at Linwood?”

Francis bent to kiss her cheek. “No, nothing serious,” he said, looking past her. “Good morning, Miss Powell.”

“Mr. Thorne,” Evadne replied, with none of her usual flirtatiousness. Thea looked at her speculatively. “Will you be with us long?”

“A few days. I’ve some matters I need to consult with my sister about.”

“Well, we are happy to have you. Would you like to see our stables?”

“If you will allow me to wash off the dirt of the road first, I’d be happy to.”

“I’ll see if Gregg has a room prepared for you. It’s a small house, really,” Evadne said, her voice floating back to Thea as she took Francis’s arm and led him inside. “I shall have to make some changes once we are married.”

Francis’s reply was lost to Thea, who stared after them, her eyebrows slightly raised. Why was Francis here? The stud surely could get by without her for a few days; it had in the past. She suspected that Evadne had more to do with his appearance here than any problems at Linwood, and the thought raised her spirits immeasurably.

“Come, kitten,” she said, taking Gillian’s hand and swinging it back and forth. “Let’s go down to the beach.”

 

“Evadne?” Francis called, peering into the dimness of the stables. He had expected to find her waiting for him at the house, but Gregg had informed him that she had come ahead. Francis grinned to himself. He was the first to admit that he didn’t understand women, but he thought he understood Evadne very well, indeed. Flirtatious she might be, but he knew it was all a game. When things got more serious, as he suspected they were between them, she changed. She got scared. He might very well have to do his fair share of pursuing during this visit. “Are you here?”

“Ooh!” Evadne brushed past him, so quickly that he pulled back in scant time to prevent a collision, and went running out into the stable yard. “I hate him, I hate him!”

“Evadne.” Francis laid a hand on her shoulder and swung her around to face him. In contrast to her usual sweet demeanor, her face was screwed up with anger and chagrin. Oddly enough, Francis preferred this look. At least it was honest. “What has happened to overset you so?”

“It’s Stanton! I hate him! He doesn’t want me to have any fun at all.”

“I see.” The gravity of his tone was belied by the twitching of his lips. “What has he done now?”

“He’s forbidden me to go riding.”

“Has he?”

“Well.” Evadne looked down, straightening the lace at her cuffs, and then raised defiant eyes to him. “He won’t let me go riding by myself.”

“Without a groom? Ah, I see. So you’re angry.”

“Yes! And all I asked was to have mounts saddled for us.”

“And that made you feel as if you can’t make your own decisions.”

“Yes! Oh, you do understand! Why can’t he?”

“I daresay he would, if you explained it to him.”

Evadne gazed up at him. He hadn’t needed to have it explained; he had understood, without words. A hard little knot of loneliness that Evadne hadn’t known was inside her began to dissolve. For the first time in her life, someone saw her as herself. “Most likely he would,” she agreed, “but I suppose he is right. I really shouldn’t ride by myself. Suppose my horse threw me?”

“That is a thought,” Francis said, his eyes twinkling at her in such a way that she felt warm all over. “Come, let’s go riding together, and you can show me around.”

Evadne smiled up at him, for once without any artifice or flirtatiousness. Never mind about Stanton; she would even forget about Mr. DeVilliers, and the meeting they had planned for that evening. Being with Mr. Thorne was much better. “I’d like that,” she said, and took his arm. Life suddenly looked far more pleasant than it had just this morning.

 

Luncheon over, the guests rose from the table, to Jeremy’s relief. What had started out to be a simple visit with his fiancée, to come to know her better, had quickly changed into something else. With the arrival of Francis Thorne, things were getting very interesting indeed. He appeared not to pay any special attention to Evadne, but, when their eyes happened to meet, both looked at each other for a moment and then quickly away. This was not mere flirting. This looked like something more serious. At another time, Jeremy might have been jealous. Not now, though. Not with Thea here.

He turned to her, smiling. “Thea, you wished to speak with me about something?”

Thea, talking with Francis, turned to look at him, her eyes startled and wary. “Yes, Stanton. If you don’t mind?”

“No, of course not. We’ll go into my study.”

“Very well.” Thea smiled at him, but her eyes remained wary. Now what, he wondered, was she so nervous about?

“You seem to be making progress with Gillian,” he commented, as they crossed the hall toward his study.

“Yes, I hope so. She fed Polly a piece of apple this morning.”

“Did she, indeed.” Jeremy stopped at the door of his study, smiling down at her. “That is progress. Now, what, I wonder, could we do to convince you to stay for a while?”

Thea looked up at him with startled eyes as he opened the door. “Jeremy—”

“What the devil?” he said, at the same time, stopping dead on the threshold, and both looked into the room. Curled up on the desk, on top of Jeremy’s correspondence, was Fluffy, looking coolly at them through slitted eyes, as if they were the intruders. It was too much. A man could handle just so much, and he had had enough. “Evadne!” he roared, and then sneezed. “Damn! Gregg!”

“Jeremy,” Thea said, putting her hand out to him.

“That damn cat. Gregg!”

“Yes, my lord, what is it?” Gregg said at his elbow.

“Where is Miss Powell?”

“In the drawing room, I believe. Shall I see, sir?”

Jeremy sneezed again. “Yes. Go and tell her to get her damned cat out of my study. Damn!” Jeremy glared at the cat. The study would have to be thoroughly cleaned and aired before he could use it again. “And I’m to put up with this, while I can’t even allow Gillian to have her kitten?”

Thea looked up at him, her eyes filled with amusement and understanding. “He really is an ugly cat, is he not?”

“Ugly is not the word for it. Evadne.”

“Yes, Stanton?” Evadne said as she came into the hall.

“You will go into my study and get that hell-born animal out of there.”

Evadne stared at him and then looked into the room. “Oh! Fluffy! You naughty cat, there you are!” She flew over to the desk, where the cat was unconcernedly grooming himself. “What a thing to do to mommy, to run off and hide like that!”

Gregg, coming back into the hall, snickered, and Jeremy’s lips tightened. “Evadne,” he said, with admirable restraint, “get that cat out of here.”

“Of course, Stanton. This won’t happen again.”

Jeremy sneezed and stepped back from her. “On that we agree. I want that cat out of my house. Now.”

Evadne stared at him. “But, Stanton—”

“You may as well resign yourself to it. I won’t have that cat in this house, now or when we are married.”

“No!” Evadne stamped her foot and clutched the cat tighter. “I won’t give Fluffy up! I won’t! Oh, you’re cruel and heartless!”

“Evadne.” Francis, who had come into the hall, put a hand on her shoulder. “Let’s take Fluffy away from here.”

“You can’t take Fluffy away from me,” Evadne said, staring at Jeremy. “You can’t.”

“I’m sorry.” Jeremy’s tone was firm. “He must go.”

Evadne stared at him, her pansy eyes filling with tears, and then spun. “Ooh! You’re a beast and you’re cruel! I hate you, Stanton, I hate you!”

Francis took a step forward. “Evadne!” he called, and then stopped, turning to look at Jeremy, his eyes cool and challenging. “She’s upset. I’d best go after her.”

“Do what you wish,” Jeremy said, raking his hand through his hair. “Damn. She’s done nothing but turn my life upside down, and now this.”

“Then why marry her, Jeremy?” Thea asked, and he looked down at her in surprise, as if he’d forgotten her presence.

“I have no choice.” His voice was clipped. “What was it you wished to speak to me about?”

Under that hard, harried gaze, Thea lost her nerve. “It can wait,” she said, and fled, leaving Jeremy to stare after her in surprise.

 

Francis found Evadne in the rose garden, sitting on one of the stone benches and squeezing Fluffy to her, though the cat yowled and squirmed. “Evadne.”

“Go away,” she said, without looking up.

He sat beside her. “Are you all right?”

“No, I am not all right! He said I have to give Fluffy up! And I won’t, I tell you! I won’t.”

“Evadne, he’s allergic to cats,” Francis said, reasonably. “Surely you knew you wouldn’t be able to keep it.”

“I don’t care. He’s a beast.”

Francis leaned back, not understanding her misery at all, and yet completely in sympathy with her. “When I heard the uproar, I thought perhaps Stanton had broken your engagement.”

“No such luck,” she muttered.

“Excuse me?”

“I said, of course not. But what am I going to do? I can’t live without Fluffy.”

The corners of Francis’s mouth twitched. “I don’t see why not. Why do you have such an ugly cat, anyway?”

“He’s not ugly!” Evadne squeezed the cat, and he meowed in protest. “He’s my own little kitty, my only friend, and he loves me.”

Francis managed to turn his involuntary laugh into a snort. It really wasn’t very funny, he thought, his eyes softening as he saw, with some surprise, that the cat was rubbing his head against Evadne’s jaw. There was a wealth of loneliness behind her words. “Evadne, once you’re married you won’t be lonely,” he said, choosing his words carefully and wondering why he was pleading Stanton’s case for him.

“What do you know about it?” Evadne stared ahead, dry-eyed. “I won’t give Fluffy up.”

Francis took her arm as she rose. “You’ll have to do something, Evadne.”

“Yes.” Her eyes were fixed on something in the distance, something only she could see, as she bent and let the cat jump from her arms. “There, Fluffy, go and play. Oh, yes.” She turned and faced Francis, looking suddenly much more mature. “I’ll do something.”

 

“I thought I might find you here,” Jeremy said, and Thea, sitting on a rock on the beach, turned with some surprise.

“How did you know?” she asked, as he sat next to her.

“Gillian told me that sometimes you and she come here and talk.” He hesitated, shifting his position. “I can’t thank you enough for what you’ve done for her, Thea. She’s a different child.”

“I like her.” Idly Thea reached down and let sand sift through her fingers. Beyond the shingly beach, the sea was wine-dark, reflecting the clouds gathering above. “I wish I could convince her to try riding, but so far she’s too scared.”

“If anyone can win her trust, you can.” He shifted again. “Thea—”

“Something’s scared her. I think she’d like to try, though. She so wants to please you.”

“Me?” He looked at her in surprise. “I don’t want her to learn to ride for me. I want her to learn for herself.”

“Yes, I know that, Jeremy. But she’s a child. She wants to please you.” She paused. “So you’ll love her.”

“Of course I love her, Thea. She knows that.”

“Then, Jeremy, why are you marrying Evadne?”

“We’ve discussed this, Thea,” he said, sharply. “A gentleman cannot cry off an engagement.”

“That’s nonsense. We hear about broken engagements all the time. Are you telling me it’s fair that the woman should be branded a jilt?”

“No, of course not, Thea.” He ran his hand through his hair. “But I gave my word. Devil take it, I know it’s not going to be easy, but I cannot break it off now.”

“For any reason?”

“For any reason.”

“I see.”

Something in her tone made Jeremy look down at her. “What did you want to speak to me about?”

Thea sifted more sand, not looking at him. “It’s not important.” Not now, when she knew it would have no effect on him. She’d realized that this afternoon, after the scene in his study; she had to face the fact now. He was going to marry Evadne, and nothing would change his mind. Knowing that, how could she tell him of her own predicament?

“Was it about Gillian?”

“No, not at all. I like the sea. It’s wild and yet comforting at the same time.”

Jeremy cast an experienced sailor’s eye up at the sky. “Storm’s coming. We’d better not stay here much longer.” He rose and held a hand out to her. She took it with reluctance, releasing it as soon as they had left the beach and were on firmer ground. She couldn’t bear touching him, not now, not when she knew how she had been used. For that was all it had been, that night in the tower room. What had been a transcendent experience for her had been only another encounter for him; she had been only another woman. He didn’t love her. If she told him about the child, he would probably do right by her. Or as right as he could. He was committed to another. Thea and her child would come second, and that, she couldn’t bear.

The storm broke when they were still a distance from the house. Catching at her hand, Jeremy pulled Thea along. They reached the house at the same time as Gillian and her governess did. Miss Moffett would have bundled her charge upstairs to get her into dry clothes, but Gillian threw herself at Jeremy. “Daddy! Thea gave an apple to Polly, and I helped!”

Jeremy smiled at her. “Did you, poppet? That’s nice.”

“Polly’s lips tickled. I was afraid she was going to bite, but Thea told me she wouldn’t.” She nestled confidingly against her father. “I like Thea, Daddy. Don’t you wish she could stay here forever and ever?”

Startled, Jeremy looked up and caught Thea’s stricken eyes. Thea, here in his house, with him forever. Damn, but he had been blind. “Yes, Gillian,” he said, his eyes never leaving Thea’s. “Yes, I think I’d like that.”