Watching Noki at bingo is a riot! I can’t keep up with her!
I have had a huge awakening, spending time with my nokomis. She has taught me about the land and being a strong Indigenous woman. I wish there had been someone in my life to help me with a berry fast when I was becoming a woman. Maybe it wouldn’t have felt like such a terrible curse. Mom just gave me pads, like, “Here are some pads. You’re gonna get your period. Take some ibuprofen. Basically, it sucks.”
Which is true.
When I think about my nokomis and everything she has taught me in such a short time, it makes me feel weepy. That’s partly because I know she’s not going to be around forever. I am so thankful she gave me this Anishnaabomowin book. I have so much more to learn from her. Maybe I should stay here with her. Who is going to listen to all her stories and make sure they are passed on to the next generation of women? What if I move back home, and Noki doesn’t make it to next summer when I come back?
And it’s not like I even know what home is going to look like or be like. But I’m not scared of going home anymore, even with the uncertainty. I know I can handle whatever is waiting for me.
The first thing I’m going to have to tell Mom is that I got beat up. She’s going to freak because I didn’t tell her sooner. Honestly, I just wanted to put it all behind me. But I know I need to tell her the complete truth, so we can start a new sort of relationship. One of honesty. I want her to know how much I do love her, and that I am thankful she is my mom. She has always been by my side. If there’s one thing I have learned this summer, it’s that that’s what good parents do.
And now I’m weeping again. Dad probably doesn’t notice because he’s singing along to the radio, playing his air guitar.
I’ll be happy to see Mom.
I’ll be happy to sleep in my own bed. I miss my pillow. I totally should have brought it with me.
I guess that’s it for now. I have to pack up and say my goodbyes.