New Boy
––––––––
It's Monday afternoon and Shaz and I are hanging out in our favorite booth. Fat snowflakes drift past the window, reminding me Thanksgiving's this week. I have no idea what Mom, Dad, and I are even doing for the holiday.
I haven't been back to ‘B&B's’ before today. Probably because being here, reminds me of the first time I met Owen. Now that he's gone, I'm all twisted up inside.
Snuggling deeper into Owen's jacket, I inhale and draw in what's left of his snowy boy smell. I should probably hang the coat in my closet, maybe take better care of it? So I'll always remember what Owen smelled like. But no. It makes him seem closer when I wear it, so I do. All the time. Except in the shower.
My drawing pad is on the table in front of me. I'm supposed to be sketching Shaz in profile—another art assignment, but this time for my new class at the Art Institute. It's pre-work for the Spring semester. Instead of capturing my best friend, though, my fingers grip the charcoal, crafting a drawing that more closely resembles Owen, the boy I've lost, rather than Shaz, the friend I've still got.
I no longer sketch Balen.
A kernel of popcorn hits my eyelid.
"Really, Shaz? We agreed. No more popcorn throwing."
Shaz shrugs. "You were doing it again. Spacing out a little, I mean. I'm worried about you." She pops a few of the kernels into her mouth and crunches. "I hardly paid any attention to my BBC marathon last night, because I was so worried about my best friend."
"I know." What can I say? I can't tell her about anything. I mean, how can I even begin to explain about Balen? It freaked my parents out when I was just a kid. How could Shaz possibly feel any different? Why take the chance?
There've been dozens of times I've started to tell her about Owen, but I just couldn't follow through. Thinking about him hurts too much. It eliminates the air in my lungs and leaves me breathless, as though I've lost an essential part of myself. But what business do I have missing someone I’ve hated more than I’ve liked?
When I look in the mirror, I don't even know myself any more. As much as I’ve tried to reconnect with the life I had before two weeks ago, I miss Owen, with his grouchy stares and his serious expression. I miss his kiss.
But most important, I miss knowing Owen is in the world.
There's something humbling about realizing you can travel anywhere on Earth, anywhere for the rest of your life...and never find the one person you're searching for.
Another kernel of popcorn hits me. "Come on, Shaz." When I meet her eye, she grins, jerking her head in an odd direction.
She's so weird sometimes. "What are you—"
"Well, hello, ‘Angry Popcorn Guy’. I didn't expect to see you again." Shaz grins.
I freeze.
"Is this seat taken?"
One voice. His voice. The one I would know anywhere.
Owen.
I'm on my feet and in his arms before I form any conscious thoughts. The stubble on his cheek scratches me as he pulls me closer. "Jemma." The way he says my name, all gravely and frustrated sends goosebumps running over my skin. "I've missed you."
"But you died." My words sound as rough as his face feels.
"I thought so, too." He brushes my cheek with his cold hand. He leads me to an empty booth in the back. We don't sit down, but instead stand in front of it. Owen glances around before he continues. "I almost did. And then I woke up human. I think the spell on my family has ended. Now that Balen's gone there's no debt left to repay. My powers are gone."
And that's when I place it. The weighty emotion in his eyes. It's not just from seeing me. It's more. It's grief.
"I'm sorry you had to lose your power." I rest my head against his chest, and sneak a glance at Shaz. She's staring at us in absolute shock, her mouth shaped in a round O for a moment, before it mouths an obscenity I can read loud and clear.
He pulls me back and I try to interpret his expression. I fail. Please don't let him be leaving again. "I'm just normal, now. There's nothing special about me."
"Did I ever mention I love normal?"
He stares at me for a moment. "Maybe we could go out? If you promise not to jump out of a moving vehicle again." His smirk is back.
"As long as you promise not to steal one?"
He laughs. "Anything for you, Cookie Monster."
And I draw his mouth to mine, and seal that promise with a kiss.