Chapter Thirteen

Izzy finished settling Archie into his crib for the night, his eyelids already drooping. Good. She needed some baby-free moments, especially when her thoughts kept straying to Nolan, and not the PG kind. She clicked off the light and stayed in the hall, catching the man who dominated her attention in the living room, on his phone. The lamp next to him cast half his face in a shadow, making him look mysterious and sexy.

She had it bad. Always had when it came to this man.

Her conscience warned her not to enter the living room, told her to go to bed alone. Risking her job wasn’t worth it. But she and Nolan weren’t an if; they were a when. If they already risked their jobs due to Archie’s existence, should she have this second moment with him?

Thoughts of her changed body tried to infiltrate her consciousness, but she beat them aside. She’d always have reasons for the worries. She was a mother now. Whether she took this leap now or later wouldn’t change the fact she’d changed.

And Nolan still wanted her like he had before.

Her body practically hummed with that thought, and now her fears morphed to a new one. What if she went off the moment he touched her?

She sauntered into the living room, but his focus remained on his phone. She needed a bold act to make this work. Or an obvious one. Or a really fast one before she went back to the shower for a little self-care.

Nolan glanced up, as if hearing her thoughts. He set his phone down, attention now solely on her. “Archie O.K.?”

She nodded, nerves taking over as though this was her very first time, and she wanted to smack herself. Take what you want, Izzy, it’s here for the taking.

At that, she walked over to him and straddled his lap. Nolan’s eyes darkened as she slid over him, his hungry gaze eating her up. She liked the feel and promise of that reaction, craved more of it. His hands gripped her hips, roaming straight up to her shoulders. That simple touch and she nearly purred and rolled over to expose her belly. “I want you.”

His lips curved up and his fingers trailed down her arms, leaving goose bumps, before he signed, “Same. What do you want?”

She bit her lip and his eyes became black orbs of desire. “Everything.”

He didn’t move, though his Adam’s apple bounced. “Really?”

She didn’t want the questions, didn’t want doubt to slither back in and ruin the moment. She shifted against him, their bodies colliding, until his eyes flickered and the pulse point at his neck intensified. “Yes.”

Nolan kissed her then. Not soft, not gentle. Hard enough that the entire year and a half they’d been apart faded and all concerns vanished. Everything in her tightened and released at once, bringing her closer and closer to that cliff, when they’d done next to nothing yet.

Goodness.

His hands roamed her back, a tame action that contrasted with what his lips were doing. Until he pulled back. “Define ‘everything,’ because last night your breasts were a bad sensitive.”

Were they still? She didn’t know, could barely form any thought that didn’t involve him touching her, kissing her, fucking her. “I don’t know. Want to try, but I’m afraid if you touch me, I’ll explode.” Wrong sign. Dammit. Why didn’t they teach sex ed ASL?

Nolan’s grin turned naughty bad boy, and a tiny tremor waved through her. “Really? You’ll explode?” The innuendo with his sign was clear as day and another tremor followed the first.

She nodded, her hands gripping his shirt, shaking with need and unable to sign.

He kissed her, easing her back until she lay on the couch, with him between her legs. She lost herself in his lips, in his tongue, her body climbing so fast she would have gotten lightheaded if she wasn’t lying down.

His hands started at her waist, trailing a slow path upward. He broke the kiss—she whimpered at the loss, didn’t matter he couldn’t hear her—and rested one hand just below her aching breast. “Let me know if yay or nay.”

Then his other hand flittered up her breast, brushing against her nipple, and all her nerve endings fled to a happy place. Her sensitive skin took the pleasure and multiplied it, bringing her to the start of the roller coaster, ready to fly down the hill.

When his hand stopped, she popped her eyes open, ready to scream for more.

“You O.K.?” he asked. She realized he didn’t know he’d nearly set her off, he was too wrapped up in making sure she’d be okay, and her heart joined in on the emotional overload.

She nodded. “Yes. Good. Better. More.” Look at her, a whole four words.

His Cheshire grin came back, and then his lips were on hers and his hand was back on her breast and the combination detonated every enjoyable cell in her body. She clutched him, riding the wave, until she lay boneless and happy.

But not sated.

“So you do like that,” he signed and she was too content to fight him.

“Yes. Thank you.”

He grinned and shifted to give her room, adjusting himself. She blinked, her lust-filled brain taking a few moments to catch up. He thought they were finished.

“We’re not done.”

He paused. “We’re not?”

She shook her head, and stood, holding out her hand. Her knees wobbled a bit, but when he placed his hand in hers, his strength traveled through, filling her up as though more than their hands touched. She led them both to his bedroom, aware of his presence behind her, where more of that delicious strength resided. The harsh lighting filled the room, emphasized the bed, and Izzy wished he had a dimmer option somewhere. Until her wound-up hormones reminded her she’d be able to see all of his glorious body.

She closed the door, then thought better of it and left it open. Archie wasn’t climbing out of his crib just yet, and she wanted to ensure she’d hear him if he needed her.

Nolan took in the door and a bit of the heat faded. “You sure? We seem to have created a baby last time.”

Yes, she was well aware of that fact. “I have an IUD.”

His eyebrows lowered. How the hell would she explain this with her limited ASL and not completely kill the mood?

“Condom plus IUD means less chance of pregnancy.”

“Less?”

Izzy raised a shoulder. “Always a risk. But less than one percent.”

He didn’t seem convinced.

“The only other option is not to have sex.” She sucked in a breath, praying he wouldn’t take that option. Door number one, not door number two!

His gaze was still hot on hers, the pulse in his neck begging for her lips. “You feel confident?”

Fake it until you make it. “I want sex in my life.” Sex that involved intercourse. “And I know your name now and where you live.” She smirked.

The hesitance faded from his face, the statue melting away as he stepped closer to her. “I want you in my life.” And before she could finish processing the signs, he yanked her in for a hard kiss, melting her bones. She clutched his shoulders, wanting to climb him like a tree and settle her aching core against him. She hardly recognized herself and the need driving her forward.

She wrapped her legs around him, his erection rubbing against her sensitive center, and she nearly orgasmed again. All her worries and fears left her. He knew her concerns, and he still wanted her.

Nolan walked them to the bed and lowered her down, no harsh fumbling movements like the last time. He took care and she knew it would be only about her if she didn’t do something.

On his bed, she unwound her legs and ran a hand down his chest. Same hard muscles she remembered, same alluring man. She clutched the latch on his pants, and Nolan’s head dropped forward. Izzy flicked open the button and wrapped her hands around his hard length.

His warm, smooth skin made her mouth water. His breaths became ragged and it filled her with power. She stroked him, fumbling at her angle, but he didn’t seem to care. She wanted more.

Izzy tried to wiggle his pants down, but Nolan caught her arm, halting her action. He held her gaze, a world of emotion swimming in those brown eyes. And then, with no prompting, he pulled his shirt off.

She was pretty sure she drooled. And her insecurity demon wanted to complain that her body no longer looked fit like his. She shut it down. Her body looked different because of him, and he’d given her no reason to think he’d be disappointed with this new version of her.

Still, she held her breath when he removed her shirt, sucking in her stomach, aware of the stretch marks near her belly button. But no heat drained from his eyes. His fingers danced up her stomach, to her breasts, and all her concerns evaporated.

Every place he touched left behind a trail of fire, nothing uncomfortable like she feared. She kissed him again, with his fingers rubbing her nipple, and her body gave another mini quake. His lips trailed down her neck, stopping at the edge of her nursing bra. He lifted his head. “Can I taste you?”

Oh, how she wanted him to. But hands-off-the-milk-makers reared its head, and Izzy honestly didn’t know if she’d be able to continue breastfeeding if she had recent memories of Nolan sucking on her. She shook her head.

He didn’t react, simply slipped down to her exposed skin below her bra, kissing to her navel, giving her the same adoration he had the first time.

She wasn’t sure if she wanted to cry or orgasm again.

Then he undid her pants, and even though more stretch marks and flab awaited him, she let him. The lights were on, but he made her feel sexy and safe, especially as his heated gaze roamed over her body; the only reaction he gave was a lick of his lips.

She quaked again, her entire body hovering on the edge of the cliff, wanting to dive over in one grand celebration. She pointed at his pants, her hands shaking. “I want you. Now.”

He grinned, but she caught the slight shake in his hands as he removed his pants, and then promptly forgot about it when he popped free. She rose to her knees, determined to take him in her mouth. He put up a hand.

“If you do that I’ll come in your mouth. And I don’t want that for tonight.”

She nodded, noting they were in similar predicaments. And it made the moment more special, more connected. He rolled on a condom, and she lay down as he crawled over her, praying this didn’t feel too different after giving birth.

Nolan brushed a damp piece of hair off her forehead. “You O.K.?”

She bit her lip but nodded. He arched a brow. “Little nervous.”

He dropped his forehead to hers and they shared a breath. “Same. Let me know if I hurt you or need to stop.”

And then he pushed inside and those little quakes soared in, building steam. No pain, no discomfort, just 100 percent pleasure. He seated himself fully inside her and stopped moving. Eyes on her, watching. She forced one hand to release its grip from his shoulder. “I’m good. More please.”

His lips tilted in a heated smile and her body climbed higher without him doing a damn thing. Then he pulled back and pushed in, the orgasm rumbling and rolling through her, taking her over, filling and building her until nothing else in the world mattered except the two of them and how they felt.

And when that blissful wave passed another came along, and another, until Izzy could no longer keep track, could only match Nolan’s pace and ride it out.

She finally settled, running her hands up and down his back, body still humming. She trailed a hand down to his ass and squeezed, and Nolan pushed in one last time, grunting his release, before resting his head on her shoulder.

Their breaths dueled for control. That had been the single best sex of her life. Nolan lifted his head, eyes dark and intense, as though seeing into her very soul. And she realized why it had been so great, because emotion had come into play.

They weren’t strangers anymore. They had evolved into something more, something stronger. And she didn’t know what that meant beyond this moment.