Chapter Three

Izzy parked in her spot at her future brother-in-law’s house, exhausted after a long day at work and an emotionally draining meeting with Nolan. The secret she’d been forced to keep for far too long had been revealed. Relief should be her first feeling. But it wasn’t.

Disappointment was.

Her dream of Archie’s father falling in love at first sight and scooping him up and never letting him go had faded to dust right there in the coffee shop, and father and son hadn’t even met.

For a brief moment Izzy wondered if it would have been better never to have found Nolan at all.

No, scratch that. This was better. Archie would at least know who his father was, even if the man earned the title of birth father. Health concerns, genetics, lineage, all that mattered more than finances.

She’d give Nolan time, he deserved that much, and chalk her unrealistic expectations up to wish fulfillment.

She got out of her car and collected her belongings, ready to enter the house she was fortunate enough to call home. She would have preferred to get a place on her own, but it was either move in with Gaby or go back to her mother’s house in Connecticut, where Izzy knew she’d never find her child’s father. Or finish college. She wanted to stand on her own two feet, but she had been lucky to graduate on time, and her sister’s help was the reason why. This job, she hoped, would open the door to being independent, and one day she’d get a little two-bedroom apartment for her and Archie.

Not on this income with housing prices in the area, but each step forward was a step in the right direction. And bonus, her sister hadn’t set a wedding date yet, so she still had hope of moving out before she infringed on newlyweds.

Her sister had been lucky, finding the right man to share her life with. Levi would be thrilled to start a family. That pesky fantasy wish, of finding Archie’s father and having him drop everything to love the child he never knew he had, lingered. Her hopes may have been unrealistic, but tell that to her ever hopeful heart.

One day, maybe, Nolan would come around. Or she’d find a different man to be Archie’s father.

And he’d be handsome and wealthy and would love her family more than she did. Because unicorns were real and elections weren’t rigged.

Izzy pushed through the front door, more than ready to see her son.

“How’d it go?” Gaby asked as she came into the room. She signed as she spoke, something both of them did most of the time, a habit whether or not Levi was in the room.

Izzy lit up at the baby on Gaby’s hip, clapping and reaching and bouncing. She gathered up Archie and held him close, breathing in that baby scent.

“Where’s the alcohol?” She mumbled the words, her face still mushed into her son’s neck. She tended bar briefly, before her pregnancy had stopped her; she could whip something together to pack a punch.

Gaby took the bag off Izzy’s shoulder. “That bad? Do you really want to pump and dump?”

Izzy shifted Archie so she could sign as she spoke. “No. Well, maybe.”

Gaby took Archie from Izzy’s hands and placed him on the floor with a cloth book. “Okay, baby’s occupied. What happened?”

Izzy shook her head, hoping the tears threatening to fill her eyes stayed at bay. She hadn’t realized how much she wanted the fantasy of a happy family until the whole thing went up in smoke. “He offered to pay child support when a kid needs more than a bank account!”

Gaby rubbed Izzy’s shoulder, signing with her free hand. “Financial support will be a good thing.”

Izzy sucked in some air. “I know. I know. I need it and you and Levi have been so helpful. But a kid needs a father. Life is so short and he’s already lost so much time.”

Gaby’s hand continued the slow, soothing pace on Izzy’s arm. “The man just found out he’s got a kid. You have to give him time to adjust. You sprang the little cutie on him.”

Archie crawled over to Izzy, then used her knees to pull to a standing position, bouncing on his feet as he grinned up at her. Her heart melted, as it always did when she looked at him. “Who can resist this little face?” She picked up her son and held him close.

“I sure can’t. Give Nolan time. He might surprise you.”

Izzy wasn’t so sure, but she breathed in the baby scent of her son as she absorbed her sister’s support. Regardless of Nolan, Archie already had a family, a small but loving one.

They’d make do. Like they always had.

…

Nolan pressed buttons on the controller, thumbed the D-pad, and did his best to beat the crap out of the character his best friend played. Bodhi, with his trick fingers, did a move Nolan had never even seen before, and Nolan’s character hit the ground, defeated.

Damn old-school games.

Nolan threw his controller on the couch at the themed bar. The entire room held various video game equipment, ranging from old-school to current, and patrons drank and played. Nolan’s idea of the perfect bar, when Bo didn’t decimate him. “What the fuck was that?” he signed.

Bo stretched out his fingers. “Magic.” He glanced around the moderate-sized bar crowd. “Are we meeting here because you’re tired of me picking on you for your half-empty apartment?”

Nolan shrugged. He needed out of his head, and the distraction of the bar held far more appeal than staying home. Nothing had settled right since Izzy’s reveal hours ago. He had a kid. A son. The concept didn’t seem real, not yet.

“Because I know you haven’t made any changes even without being there. It doesn’t look like you live there, know what I mean? At the very least put some of your artwork up on the walls.”

Nolan’s apartment suited his needs. Sure, it had bare walls and could be an Airbnb for all the personality he put into it. Did he really need to hang up his drawing of a sunset when he lived alone and could see the image on his computer? “You want to be my decorator?”

Bo grinned. “I’m not that kind of queer. Though you need some color; have you heard about anything beyond beige?”

Nolan narrowed his eyes and glared.

Bo’s teasing smile faded at Nolan’s inability to tease back. “What’s got you all tied up? Find something new to mess up?”

Nolan scrubbed a hand down his face. Once a screw-up… The answer was a clear, “Yes.”

Bo leaned forward. “The new job? You worked hard at that place in New York, the blowup wasn’t your fault.”

He had a history of starting off good then turning to shit. Case in point: New York and the social media fiasco from hell. “Not the job.”

Bo waited and Nolan knew he’d wait him out. Always had. They’d met in kindergarten and struck up a fast friendship. Good thing, too, since a small school meant if relationships went sour, there weren’t many options to run to. But Nolan and Bodhi were at each other’s sides from day one. Heck, Bodhi tried his best to run interference when the rocket went out of control, and still had the scar on his hand from the noble attempt.

Therefore Nolan didn’t try to hide. Bo knew all his mess-ups and hadn’t judged a single one. He leaned forward, grabbing his beer and taking a swig. “Remember that woman, the ASL student?”

“The one you obsessed over?”

“I don’t obsess!”

Bo rocked his hand from side to side. “You obsess.”

Nolan narrowed his eyes.

Bo leaned back, sipping his own drink, waiting Nolan out.

“I found her.”

Bo leaned forward, drink forgotten, not needing any explanation for the sudden subject shift. “Really? Why aren’t you happy?”

“She had a kid.” He focused on the neon bar light above Bo’s head. “My kid.”

Bo’s eyebrows reached for the lock of dark hair that always flopped over his forehead. “What?”

“I have a son. Nine months old. Named A-R-C-H-I-E.” The words didn’t seem real. He conjured up the image on Izzy’s phone, of the smiling baby, and struggled to feel something. That kid could be any other picture of a kid. He tried to mesh it into his reality, make it click and settle. Maybe in time it would.

Bo didn’t lower his brows. “Are you sure? I don’t want to be a prick, but you don’t know this woman; she could be lying.”

“Right, because anyone would want me to be a father.” Nolan shook his head. “No, I trust her.” He had no reason to question Izzy, not when the timing lined up, not when the kid could blend in with his own baby pictures.

Bo ran his hands through his hair. “Wow. You have a kid. I told you skipping that day of health class would have repercussions.”

Nolan growled, the vibrations in his throat an involuntary necessity. Bonus because Bo had a cochlear implant and Nolan had often been accused of being loud.

He hadn’t a clue what sound level the bar had, but when Bo cupped his ear, he figured the bastard heard him. “I can’t hear you.”

Nolan flipped him off.

Bo wiped the air. “O.K., you have a kid. What are you going to do about it?”

Nolan fisted his hair. The million-dollar question. “No clue. Izzy has it under control. I’ll mess things up.”

Bo chucked a controller at him; it rammed into his shoulder with enough force to leave a bruise. “Don’t be stupid. Yes, you will mess things up. All parents mess up. But you know damn well the hole a missing father leaves behind. Don’t be that hole.”

Nolan rubbed his chest, and the ache there, even though the offending object had hit his shoulder. “I don’t know the first thing about being a father.”

“Not the kid’s fault.” Bo picked up the controller and loaded a new game. Nolan joined in, enjoying being out of the spotlight for a while. It wasn’t Archie’s fault he was a screw-up who still played video games and lived in the equivalent of a sparsely decorated college dorm.

The fault belonged to Nolan and not learning from his own conception. He had to figure out if he could be something more, or if history had already provided the answer.