Four

TALLULAH

I pick a navy blue dress for my lunch with Xavier. It’s modestly cut with a flared skirt, but there’s a small keyhole in the decolletage that makes me flush. I pair it with some simple black ballet flats and slowly find my way to the dining room downstairs.

Around my neck, the key Xavier gave me hangs on the cross necklace I got from my parents. I cautiously wrap my fingers around the cross as I walk into the dining room. My heart skips a beat at seeing Xavier already at the dining table.

“Hello,” I say, flushing at the weak sound of my voice. I’m so damn nervous and it shows.

“Hi, angel,” Xavier replies with a grin, pointing to a seat next to him. “Come, have some food with me.”

I join him and gently place a napkin on my lap. The food is brought out. Steaming platters of meat, vegetables, potatoes and more makes my mouth salivate. I’ve eaten more since I’ve been here than in days before coming here. I remind myself I’ll have to ask Xavier what I can do to work off the calories.

As if reading my mind, he tells me, “I know you rode horses at home. We also have stables here, along with a pool and home gym you’re of course free to use anytime you want, angel.”

“Thank you.”

“Over the coming weeks you’ll explore the house,” he goes on. “I hope you like everything you find. And if there’s anything I can do for you, never hesitate to tell me. You know I love to spoil you.”

“I do,” I smile shyly. “You have more presents for me, I’m sure.”

“Plenty,” he laughs. “But eat first, then you’ll open them and I’ll show you around the Casa.”

I nod. So many questions race through my mind as I eat. Did my mother ever live here? Did she like the place? Why did she not get along with Xavier?

The food is so distractingly good I forget all about my questions. I eat my fill of the delicacies laid out for me and moan at the amazing taste of it all.

“I’m glad you like it so much,” Xavier tells me. “I don’t like picky women.”

“No one could be picky around here,” I reply. “Everything tastes amazing.”

I notice Xavier doesn’t eat as much, his eyes quietly following me around as I load up my plate again. Once I’m finally full, he signals for the servants to clear up the table.

“Let’s go take a tour of the house,” he suggests, and I nod eagerly, hooking my arm through his as he leads me through the dining room’s double doors into the backyard.

Backyard is an insult to the beautiful grounds behind the house, though.

There’s an infinity pool that overlooks the cliffs and the sand beach beneath the house. The stables are in the far off distance but there’s also a beautiful flower garden on the property.

“The pool is a recent addition,” Xavier tells me. “Everything else has been in the family for a long time.”

“How long have you lived here?”

“Since I was seven.”

“You were adopted, right?”

“Yes, Fernando Gunn adopted me when Heath’s father was eight years old.”

“Did you get along with him?”

“I did. He never treated me any differently than Heath’s father.”

“What about my grandfather? What was he like?”

“Pedro... he was nothing like me. But somehow we got along, anyway. We were close. I cared about him very much.”

“I’m sad I never got to meet him and my grandmother,” I mutter. “And nobody on Mom’s side either.”

“That’s the cartel world,” Xavier shrugs. “It’s a dangerous world.”

“You say that like you don’t care about anybody,” I say.

“You learn not to harbor deep emotions in this lifestyle,” Xavier goes on. “It only bites you in the ass when you lose people.”

“What about me?”

He grins at me, picking a rose from a nearby bush and tucking it into my hair. “What about you, angel?”

“You felt nothing for me either?”

The question sits heavily between us, and I can tell Xavier is avoiding answering it. But I’m so desperate for his attention I can’t even wait for him to answer in his own time. Instead, I throw myself around him to make sense of everything I found out today. Maybe if I kiss him, I will understand. And maybe, if he kisses me back, there’s still some hope for us.

My arms encircle Xavier’s neck, and I press my lips to his urgently. I kiss him with every ounce of desperation I’ve hidden from him all these years, urging him to give me back his love. My hands find his face and I hold him close, standing on my tiptoes so I can reach him.

But Xavier doesn’t respond.

Instead, he grabs me by the waist and gently pushes me back.

“You can’t do that, angel,” he mutters, his gaze burning with silent fire as he glares at me from just a few feet away.

“Why not?” I demand. “Aren’t we going to be married in a year, anyway?”

“Tallulah, you’re seventeen.”

“You don’t need to remind me.”

“I will not touch you until you’re eighteen.”

“You don’t have to touch me, just kiss me,” I plead.

“No, Tallulah. Not until your next birthday.”

“But it’s my birthday today! I want this.”

“I can’t help you.”

I purse my lips at him, saying, “I will not wait a full year before I get to kiss you again.”

“You’ll have to.”

“No!” I stomp my foot against the ground, my gaze finding his and demanding his attention. “I don’t agree. I’ll be miserable. We have to make a deal.”

He groans, rubbing his temples. “What is it with your family and these deals? Fine, Tallulah. What kind of deal would you like?”

“Every week, we spend one day together like we’re a couple. And you’ll let me kiss you.”

“No fucking way,” he laughs at me.

“Please,” I whine. “One day every month? That’s only twelve until my birthday.”

I can tell he’s hesitating now. He wants this, wants me. But he’s not giving in just yet.

“What about once every season?” I beg. “On the first day of every time the season change. Please, Xavier?”

“Fine,” he grunts, making me shriek with excitement. He holds his hand up and adds, “You will not do anything other than kiss me, though. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” I nod eagerly before a devilish smile takes over. “You know what date today is, right?”

“September twenty-first,” I nod. “Your birthday.”

“It’s also the first day of fall.”

“Fuck.” He rubs his eyes, avoiding my gaze. “I can’t do this today, Tallulah.”

“Why? You got somewhere to be?”

“Yes,” he mutters. “Anywhere that isn’t near you.”

I pout. “Am I really such poor company?”

“No. You’re just very... tempting company.”

“Is that so bad?”

“Yes, it’s awful.”

“Then leave,” I tell him with a devilish smile. “I won’t force you, just like you won’t force me.”

He stares me down, making me wonder whether I’m playing the game right. Finally, something in Xavier appears to break, and he takes a step forward, grabbing my neck from behind. I gasp, never getting the chance to inhale again as he pulls me firmly against him.

“I’ll teach you how to kiss,” he mutters against my lips. “I’ll teach you every-fucking-thing.”

With those words, he sinks his lips to mine. My heart pounds with expectation as I feel his mouth parting my lips and his tongue darting inside me, claiming me in a way I’ve almost dreamed of.

The smallest of mewls escapes my lips, and he uses it to deepen our kiss. My knees shake but he helps me stay up, his other arm entwining my hips and pulling me closer against him.

I can feel something through the fabric of his pants. I know what it is. I’m just not ready to admit it to myself, so I focus on the kiss instead.

There’s so much passion in the way Xavier claims me, I melt into his embrace just to get more of it. He has a way of holding and kissing me that makes me feel like the only person in the world beside him. My body melts and molds to his, eager for more.

And yet I can tell my husband-to-be is holding back. There’s a tension to his body I know he won’t let himself ease. He needs to hold back, so he doesn’t go too far... Like we agreed. And now I’m upset with myself. I didn’t beg for more, because already the kiss isn’t enough. Nothing ever will be when it comes to Xavier Gunn.

Finally, he pulls back, his eyes clouded over with passion as he looks away.

“Your lipstick,” he mutters without looking at me. “It’s all over your face.”

“Oh,” I whisper, dabbing at my lips. “Now everyone will know I belong to you.”

“They know already,” he mutters. “And if anyone’s ever inappropriate to you, they also know I’ll cut their fucking throats open.”

“Are you always so ferocious?”

“Yes.”

“And so possessive?”

“Only when it comes to you.”

I grin with satisfaction, knowing I’m special to him. “The day isn’t over just yet. I can get more kisses, right?”

“Not for a while,” he mutters, turning with his back against me. “Come on. Time for you to open the rest of your presents.”

I don’t question him, just follow back inside the house where all my gifts have been laid out in the salon. I rip through the wrapping paper, unboxing perfumes, jewelry, and beautiful clothes. All of it is so over the top and decadent I can’t help but gasp at each new item I unearth from layers of tissue paper.

And yet I can’t help but notice Xavier’s mood has changed. He seems more troubled now that he was earlier. As I thank him and open more gifts, I wonder why this is so hard for him.

If it’s because he secretly doesn’t like me, he’s certainly an excellent actor.

If it’s because he wants more, I see no reason he shouldn’t act on his desires - especially since they match my own.

“Xavier,” I say. “You seem a thousand miles away. What’s going through your mind?”

“I... I have some business to do soon,” he mutters, clearing his throat. “You going to be okay on your own for a while?”

“No,” I pout. “I thought today was supposed to be my special day.”

“It is.”

“Then why don’t you want to spend it with me?”

“Tallulah... It’s not that I don’t want to.”

“Then what?”

“Nothing?” He gets up and walks away, adding, “Enjoy opening the rest of your presents. I’ll see you again tomorrow.”

“No!” I throw the wrapping paper on the ground and race ahead of him, making a guard outside the room awkwardly clear his throat. “I don’t want to wait until tomorrow. I want you with me today. And I want you to kiss me again.”

He gently shoves me back inside the salon, closing the door behind us before facing me with a stony expression.

“You’re pushing me, Tallulah,” he says in a cool tone I’m unfamiliar with. “You won’t like it when I lose control.”

“I think I’ll love it,” I grin. “Are you going to kiss me again?”

“Why are you so damn desperate? You've never been kissed before or something?”

I flush, and he laughs at me.

“Don’t worry, I knew about that. I made sure your parents kept you away from boys.”

“You did that?” I narrow my eyes at him. “That’s unfair.”

“I don’t fucking care. Now stop acting bratty and get your little hands off me.”

I glare and pull back. “You don’t love me.”

“Never said I did.”

Tears fill my eyes and I mutter, “Nobody does.”

There’s an awkward silence between us. It’s my first glimpse of what hating Xavier is like. Something I’ll have plenty more of in the future, I’m sure.

“I don’t do this to be mean to you, angel,” Xavier goes on. “I do it because I want to spare you as long as I can.”

“How is that sparing me? I need you,” I whine. “I need somebody to love me.”

“Somebody, huh?” He raises his brows at me. “Just anyone would do?”

I flush. “N-No.”

“Why me then?”

“Because you’re... you . My Xavier. My favorite person in the world.”

“And kissing you will not change that?”

“No,” I shake my head. “Of course not.”

“Even if I kiss you like this?”

My heart pounds into overdrive as he grips me with shocking strength. His fingers bruise my skin where he touches it. Unlike the kiss from before, when I could tell he was holding back, this one is almost punishing. The force with which he presses his mouth to mine is bruising, and he claims me with such ferocity it makes me shiver in his arms.

“So, Tallulah?” he mutters against my lips. “Can you take that, or is it too much for you?”

My thoughts race. Suddenly I’m grateful we’ll only be doing this for three more days this year... But then I realize I’ll be damned to spend the rest of eternity with him after my next birthday.

“N-No,” I lie, making him smirk.

“Too bad,” he mutters. “Because I’m only just getting started.”

TO BE CONTINUED

Xavier and Tallulah's story continues in The Dark Protector. Preorder now!