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“HARPENBERTH? I HAVE not heard of that battle,” said MacPhearson.
“You see, there was...”
“I must wait to hear your stories, Glorie MacGreagor, I do not have the time just now. I have a battle of my own to fight.”
“A battle? Over what?”
“We are in need of lasses,” he answered.
“These? You cannot want these. They...itch, they smell, they twitch and one has the hick ups incessantly. Another, the one with dark hair. When you look in her eyes, you can see the gates of hell, and that one, she screams in the night. She does not mean to, but...”
Laird MacPhearson started to laugh. “You need not charm me any longer. After the battle, you will be mine Glorie MacPhearson.”
She was not pleased and got up of her own accord. “I would not have you, you are a stupid man. You die for your pride, which is the same as dying for nothing.” She turned and walked back to her horse. Without any help, she swung up, and once she got settled, she put her hands together and said one last prayer loud enough for all to hear. “May God bless and protect all the men who are not stupid this day in the Scottish Highlands!”
MacPhearson ignored her insults and took a long look at the lassies. Some were very becoming and some were ordinary, but he was in no position to be choosey. “What price for half, MacGreagor?”
At long last, Neil moved his horse forward. “They are not for barter.”
“Then you will fight and you will die.”
“You are two against one. Does it take that many to win your battles?” He stayed a few feet away, but got close enough to watch the other man’s expressions.
“At least I do not send a lass to try to frighten me off.”
Neil smiled. “It has worked before on simple minded lads, but it appears you are more worthy than most. I do not suppose you are frightened of a lass with a mark.”
“Not in the least.”
“Then you are sensible too. But you need two of your lads to kill each of mine. I had hoped you might save us both the trouble of having to train more lads, by putting your best against mine instead.”
“We need lasses, MacGreagor. If it takes two lads to kill each of yours then so be it.”
Neil looked him in the eye, could see no way out, and was about to go back and let the battle begin, when he thought of something. “Are you a God fearing man?”
“Aye”
“Would you make a lass commit adultery?”
“Of course not.”
“I am pleased to hear it. Some of these are already married.”
MacPhearson eyed Neil suspiciously. “And you are not inclined to tell me which ones?”
“I am not.”
MacPhearson slowly smiled. “You are a clever lad. Do you mean to send us away empty handed?
“Aye, but I will tell you a secret.”
“Which is?”
“There are plenty wanting Highlander husbands. All one need do is go to England and make an offer.”
“What sort of offer?”
“Tell them they can choose their own husbands, they will not be forced and they will have plenty of meat to eat.”
MacPhearson raised an eyebrow, “Meat?”
“Aye, the English give all their meat to the wealthy.”
Laird MacPhearson stared at the ground and considered Neil’s instructions. “We are not fond of forcing lasses anyway. They tend to kill us in our sleep when we do.”
“Keeps a lad from getting his rest,” Neil agreed.
“True enough. Where do the MacGreagors live?”
“North of the Haldane and just west of the Kennedy Clan.”
MacPhearson spit on the ground, “We hate the Kennedys.”
“I can see why.”
MacPhearson’s eyes widened and he gave Neil’s stature a more intense examination. Then he began to chuckle, “You are the giant?”
Neil grimaced, “That rumor will be the death of me.”
“You mean there is no golden sword?”
Neil dismounted, put his arm around the man’s shoulders and began to walk him back to his horse. “I would show you the sword, but it disappeared along with my magic horse and the fire breathing dragon I had in a very large pen behind the Keep.”
Again MacPhearson laughed. Then he pointed west. “If you would like to see my dragon, you are welcome. We live over there.”
“I would like that.” Out of respect for a man he thought he might call friend someday, Neil bowed. It seemed to please MacPhearson greatly and when Neil turned to go back to his horse, he did not feel a hot glare or the fear of being cut down from behind. Nor did he look back as it would have been a sign he did not trust the man.
Just as Neil swung up on his horse, MacPhearson ordered his men to let them pass, and as the MacGreagors walked their horses through, Laird MacPhearson smiled at as many women as he possibly could. “Treat them well, MacGreagor, or they will come to us and we will welcome them.”
They were almost all the way past when Neil looked back and shouted, “They have free will. They are free to choose their own clan and their own husbands. If they are unhappy with us, I will bring them to you myself.”
“Meat, MacGreagor?”
“Meat, MacPhearson, meat!” Neil yelled back.
*
ONCE MORE, THEY AVOIDED a war, but Neil was not pleased. He had too much to worry about to let anything go wrong. A dark, gray sky, the smell of rain and the faint sound of thunder in the distance convinced him they were about to get wet. So he sent scouts to find trees with thick lower branches to shield them and was relieved when they quickly reported back.
Once they were stopped for the night, Neil asked Greer to collect Glorie and bring her to him.
Burk was expecting it and at the mention of Glorie’s name, he wanted to be nearby. Women sometimes cry when they are chastised and need a man to hold them—that man was going to be him, if he had anything to say about it.
Everyone, even the women knew what was coming...except Glorie.
*
GLORIE COULD NOT BELIEVE it, “You are unhappy with me?”
Neil did not exhibit his most ferocious frown, but he frowned nevertheless. “You did a foolish thing today. You might have gotten several of us killed.”
“How?”
He could not believe she was questioning him and had to remind himself she was English. “How?”
“Yes, how? I wanted to pray for the men who were about to die and since the MacGreagors are vastly larger, I was certain the MacPhearsons needed me more.”
She had a point and Neil was not at all prepared for her kind of logic. “Aye, but the lad might have cut you down where you stood.”
She put her hands on her hips in a huff. “I was not standing, I was kneeling, and no lad, even the most wicked would kill a lass in the presence of God. Highlanders do believe in God, do they not?”
“All the ones I know do.”
“Well then, the English and the Scots have more in common than you think. Am I excused yet?”
“Not yet.” He ran his fingers through his hair and tried to calm himself. Scolding Glorie should have been easy, but it was not working out as well as he hoped. “You lied to the lad. For someone who prays constantly...”
“Oh that. ‘Tis quite all right with the Father if one has to lie in the presence of one’s enemies.”
“I thought bearing false witness was against God under all circumstances.”
“Except when in the presence of one’s enemies. Everyone knows that. How else are we to survive such things? For all we know, Laird MacPhearson could have been a blight who enjoys killing for the sport of it.”
“I am happy to see you understand at least that much. May I remind you, you lied while you were on your knees praying?”
“Well, that might not be so allowable, but it could not be helped. I could not let him take the women, now could I?”
“Glorie, that is precisely the problem. They are my responsibility, not yours. You are a lass and you must...”
“Obey lads at all times, for all reasons and in front of all other people. But lads are not always right, you are aware. Besides, you lied too.”
“When?”
“When you said some of us were married. But do not fret, I have already spoken to God and He has forgiven us both for our transgressions.”
Neil was so frustrated, he did not know what to do. Then he spotted Burk and nodded for him to come forward. While he waited, he made himself calm down and remember to change from English to Gaelic. “Our lovely and wonderful Glorie is having a difficult time understanding our rules. I assign you to stay close to her for the rest of this journey. If she again tries to interfere, you are to detain and keep her quiet.”
Instead of looking put upon, Burk could not have been happier. Neil watched him take Glorie away and closed his eyes. God help the man who marries that one.
