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Sitting in the back of the limo on the way to the office on Monday morning, it felt as if the earth had shifted slightly on its axis. I had no idea how I was going to get through the week, and I was already on edge at the prospect of seeing Seraphina again. I’d already worked out what she would be wearing today. Monday, week one: navy pencil skirt that showed off her cute little ass and the cream silk blouse. Her hair would be up in that elegant, twisted style that always left me wondering how she managed it on her own.
I didn’t normally go straight to the lab, although I knew she would already be there. She was there before eight every morning, despite my insistence that she didn’t need to be in until nine. I’d tried to set limits with her so that she didn’t overwork herself and all-in-all she stuck to my 4 p.m. curfew, but I dreaded to think how early she arrived in the morning. She was certainly in before Melissa or myself, and she was always well into her work by the time I arrived.
I think one of her misgivings about us having a relationship was that she was concerned it would affect her job, which she loved. I promised her we could maintain a professional working relationship, and no one would be any the wiser, although I had no clue how I was going to achieve that. Now I’d tasted those honey lips of hers and had her legs entangled around my waist, I didn’t know how I was going to keep my word on that one. The first sight of her perky ass in that skirt and my mind was going straight to the gutter. I decided I would have to make sure I stuck to my two hours in the lab every day and not let that stretch to three or four, which had been happening in the past few weeks.
I’d spent a restless night thinking about how I wanted things to play out between us and how I should move matters forward. Despite her blindingly raw reaction to me, I could see she still had doubts about the whole thing. It was like she was teetering at the edge of a high diving board, afraid to make that jump. I’d decided that I would have to be patient and allow her to make the first move. It was going to be hell, but it was better for her to think that she was in the driving seat and making all the decisions. That meant not making a grab for her in any shape or form until she was ready.
As I walked into my lab later that day, I saw immediately that although the plan sounded reasonable at two in the morning, in the cold light of day, it was another matter altogether. She startled a little as I flounced into the room, which was unusual because she rarely batted an eyelid. Once she’d gotten over her initial shock at seeing me, I saw an array of different emotions cross her face. She was like a chameleon who couldn’t decide what color it wanted to be. She looked back at her computer screen quickly and I watched her breathing deeply, as if she were trying to calm herself. I figured it was good that I was having a dramatic effect on her; it was certainly better than indifference.
I went straight into professional mode, approaching her with some new data I wanted her to work on. I pulled my stool up close to her and sat beside her as I always did, but as our arms touched, a frisson of connection crackled between us. She looked up at me in confusion. She was struggling with this as much as I was and wasn’t sure what to do with it. I knew I had to get out of there, pronto.
“Well, I’m sure you know what you’re doing with that,” I spluttered, and with that, I practically ran out of the lab and back into the safety of my office.
I flopped into my chair, breathing heavily. Well played, Milo. I laughed to myself. Very cool and professional. She was holding me prisoner and here I was, hiding out in my office, having to avoid her. It was obvious I needed to rethink my strategy if I were going to survive the week.
I called in Melissa and took another look at my schedule, getting her to remove the lab time I normally coveted and put some crappy business meetings in its place. My intent was to keep our interactions to a bare minimum so that I wouldn’t be tempted to do anything inappropriate before our weekend together.
By the time Thursday rolled around, I had been productive, but my temper had been raising its ugly head on a regular basis and I had been throwing hissy fits like an adolescent tennis pro. I wanted to catch Seraphina before she left on Thursday to make sure all was good for the weekend, so I made sure I was in the lab by 3:45 before she left for the afternoon.
She seemed to be in full workflow mode when I walked in because she didn’t look up to acknowledge me. She tapped away aggressively at her keyboard, and I thought she looked a little sad, which was unusual. I sat down beside her and watched her, but after a while it became obvious that she was not going to look at me. I figured she was just so immersed in her work that it was hard for her to break off at that moment, but this went on for a few uncomfortable minutes. It occurred to me that I’d offended her in some way.
“Seraphina,” I coaxed. “Are you okay?”
When she finally turned to face me, her eyes were full of hurt. “You’ve been avoiding me,” she accused.
I didn’t really know how to respond to that because it was true. I had been avoiding her, but probably not for the reasons she had in her mind. I figured honesty was the best policy. “Yes, I have been avoiding you. It’s the only way I’ve been able to get through the week.”
She looked down at her keyboard, unappeased by my response. “If you’ve changed your mind about me, I’d rather you just tell me straight.”
I was confused for a second, trying to figure out what she was talking about, and then it struck me. She thought I’d been avoiding her because I didn’t want to see her when it couldn’t have been further from the truth.
I spun her chair around so she was facing me. “Seraphina, look at me,” I implored. “The only reason I’ve been avoiding you is because I can’t keep my hands off you, not because I’ve changed my mind. We agreed we would be professional at work, but I guess my willpower is not as strong as yours.”
“So, you still like me?” she asked, her face full of doubt.
“Of course I still like you!” I laughed. “I just wanted to check you were still coming home with me tomorrow after work.”
Her shoulders sagged with relief, and she let out a sigh, but she still didn’t look convinced. “Are you sure you want me to come? I would understand if you didn’t...” Her voice drifted off, and she stared at her monitor, blinking as if she were trying not to cry. My heart broke for her. She could shred her self-esteem better than anyone I’d ever met. She really had no idea why I would want to be with her, and she was just waiting for me to come to my senses.
I wanted to pull her into my lap, hold her, and give her the reassurance I’d been unable to give her all week, but I knew I shouldn’t, so I just grabbed her hand and pressed it to my lips. “I’ll be really disappointed if you don’t come. I’ve been looking forward to it all week.”
That must have done the trick because finally she flashed me a beautiful smile and said, “Of course I’ll come.”
I was relieved she had come around, but I was realizing just how deeply seated her self-doubt and insecurity were. I knew this was something I would have to be mindful of, but I lacked experience. I was, after all, a self-obsessed pain in the ass. What the hell did I know about caring for anyone, particularly someone with her kinds of challenges?
FRIDAY FELT LIKE IT would never end with back-to-back meetings and my fair share of daily annoyances. I could feel my temper bubbling over constantly, but I was desperately trying to keep it together and not allow it to ruin the start of my weekend.
By 5 p.m. I was seated in the back of my limo with my adorable research assistant, and we were making our way home. I had stowed her small overnight bag safely in the back, and she sat beside me, tapping out a pattern on my hand with her fingertips. I wasn’t sure if it was a melody she had in her head or if it was Morse code. Perhaps she was tapping out an S.O.S. to someone.
Her big brown eyes looked a little heavy-lidded, and she was quiet. I guessed it was her normal Friday night fatigue, and I wasn’t expecting much in the way of conversation from her. I figured we would eat and then veg out in front of the TV before she passed out for the night. I’d planned to open a bottle of wine, but I wasn’t sure if she could even drink with the meds she had to take.
Lara pulled up in front of the house and I held out my hand to Seraphina. She took it gratefully and leaned against me as she got out of the car, decidedly wobbly on her legs. She wanted to grab her bag, but I steered her away and Lara brought it into the house for us. With my arm firmly around her waist, I helped her inside, guiding her towards the small sitting room. Emmy already had a fire going, and I figured it would be cozier if we ate in there. Emmy had left a meal for us on the stove, and I’d told her to go home early to give Seraphina and me some alone time together. She had prepared a delicious chili with some rice and bread, and she’d uncorked a nice bottle of Merlot and left it breathing on the island.
I showed Seraphina her room so she could get changed and asked her if she was able to have a glass of wine. Apparently, a glass would be okay as long as she didn’t have more than one.
She giggled. “I hope I don’t fall asleep in my food.”
I set about serving us both some dinner, laying it all out on the long coffee table in the sitting room. She fussed about wanting to help me, but she didn’t put up much resistance when I refused. I think she was honestly bushed. We enjoyed a companionable dinner with me doing most of the talking. She really appreciated Emmy’s chili, and I was surprised at how much she ate. She was such a petite girl. I didn’t think she would have much of an appetite, but she certainly did it justice.
After dinner, we settled down to watch some TV. Rather than watching ER, I put on a classic rom com, You’ve Got Mail, which I thought she might enjoy. It certainly didn’t take much brain power and there was definitely no violence. She seemed happy with my choice and smiled when she saw the opening credits come up.
“You like this one?” I asked.
“Oh, yes. One of my favorites,” she said. “Mom liked it too. She liked Tom Hanks.”
She didn’t talk about her mom much, so I was a little surprised when she mentioned her. I figured it was a sign she was growing more comfortable with me.
I grabbed a pillow and got her to lie down with her head in my lap. She finished her wine and curled up like a sleepy kitten. I wasn’t sure how much of the movie she was taking in, but now and then she would chime in with one of the lines. She obviously knew it well. I’d seen the movie a few times myself, and I wouldn’t say it was my kind of thing, but I just enjoyed having her there as I ran my fingers through her silky hair.
We’d eaten fairly early, so I think she stayed awake through most of the movie, although I couldn’t be sure. As we got to the big mushy ending where they meet in the park, she suddenly quoted Meg Ryan’s closing line: “I wanted it to be you. I wanted it to be you so badly.” Her voice had a dreamy, not-quite-there quality to it, and I stroked her sleepy face.
As the credits rolled, she stirred herself and sat up, stretching her arms over her head.
“Do you want to go to bed, sweetheart?” I asked her.
She smiled and nodded a little sadly. “I’m sorry I need to go to bed so early.”
I put my arm around her as we walked toward her room. “It’s okay. You need to rest. We’ll have the entire day tomorrow and Sunday. You’ll feel better after a good night’s sleep.”
She reached up on her toes and hugged me just like she had the previous week, only this time, it felt different, as if there were an intense yearning pouring out of her. It was all I could do to stop myself from gathering her up and carrying her to my bed, but I had a plan and I needed to stick to it. I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and pulled away gently, turning to smile at her as I left. “Going by your past record, I expect I’ll see you around ten tomorrow.”
She looked exhausted, but there was also something else there, maybe regret or sadness, I wasn’t sure, and she gave me a small smile as she closed the door to her room.
It was only just after eight, so it was far too early for me to be turning in. I decided to go back and watch another movie and enjoy a glass of whiskey or two. I chose something decidedly more to my taste that involved a lot of explosions and a high body count. I hit the sack around eleven, glowing nicely from the fine malt that I’d enjoyed. As I passed by her door, I almost peeked in on her, just to see her sleeping, but decided that would be too creepy and carried on reluctantly to my own room.
The amount of alcohol I’d consumed should have ensured a sound sleep, but I tossed and turned for close to an hour, thinking about the baffling beauty in the room next to me. There was a full moon, and I opened the blinds to allow the moonlight to seep into my room, casting shadows on the floor.
I must have dropped off eventually, but I awoke with a start when I heard my bedroom door creak open and the sound of soft footsteps. Feeling decidedly groggy, I rolled onto my side to find Seraphina standing in a beam of moonlight, cautiously approaching me. I wondered for a moment if she was sleepwalking, but she seemed to be awake. She was wearing a pale, silky nightgown with narrow straps, and her feet were bare. There was an ethereal quality about her as she stood there in the shadows, and for a moment, I thought I was dreaming. “Seraphina?” I whispered uncertainly. “Are you okay?”
She came closer and sat on the edge of the bed, and I could see that her nightgown was pale pink. It left nothing to the imagination, and I could clearly see the outline of her breasts under the silky fabric.
“I woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep,” she whispered in a husky voice.
I wondered if she was nervous in a strange house or if she had had a bad dream. I thought about what might help. “Would you like me to get you some warm milk or some tea?”
She shook her head. “No, I don’t think that would help.” She hesitated for a beat before she continued. “I couldn’t sleep because I was thinking about you.”
At those words, my heart rate must have increased tenfold. I had to check we were on the same page, so I pressed her. “What were you thinking about, exactly?”
She was close enough for me to see a flush of color rush to her cheeks, and I knew at that moment why she was here. I wondered if a celebratory air punch would be impolite, but I managed to restrain myself and tried to play it cool.
She still hadn’t answered me, and I could see she was struggling to put her words together. Seconds later, she dispensed with the need to explain, and I watched as she stood up and stripped her nightgown over her head, abandoning it on the floor.
I took a second to allow my eyes to drift up the length of her naked beauty. Every inch of her was waxed smooth, and she had to be the most breathtaking thing I’d ever seen, petite but perfectly in proportion, with beautifully rounded breasts and hips. My heart was thundering in my chest so hard I thought I was going to have heart failure. I’m not sure what my face was saying at that point because she felt the need to ask, “Is this okay?”
I pulled back the covers and extended my hand to her with a smile. “I sincerely hope you’re not a dream, Seraphina. I mean, if you were a dream, you would be the best dream ever, but I really want you to be real right now. You are real, aren’t you? You’re not going to disappear on me?”
She shook her head solemnly, as if I were serious, and climbed in beside me.