isn’t the best tea you’ve ever had!” Dendup gulps down another cup of the steamy brew while I curl my bare feet against the stove. The chilly morning breeze caught me washing myself in the yard, sending me straight inside with a stern reminder of the early arrival of Autumn.
“Oh, brother.” I peer at my ruddy toes. “I bet you say that to all the ladies.” The tea is excellent indeed, but I’m sure it’s the innkeeper’s loving arms that attract Dendup to this guesthouse so much. He puts on one of his quasi-frowns, followed by the ever-playful glance from under his furry eyebrows.
“Now, sister of mine.” His voice raises with his cup in front of me. “You shouldn’t be thinking so ill of your elder, let alone speak like that.” He pinches his lips, and a rueful smile curls from under his moustache. “But I’m willing to forgive you for your brazen manner, if you pour me another cup.” He dangles the cup in front of me. The gleam on his face says it all—he had a grand night.
“So sorry, brother.” I hasten to get the kettle. “I don’t know what came over me.” He leans back as I pour him another cup, feigning a meek smile. We’re good.
“Now, before I forget.” He rubs his moustache, waiting for the tea to cool. “A friend of yours came by yesterday.”
My breath stalls, for the low tone in his voice predicts no good.
“Or should I say, a foe of yours?” Dendup points his chin over my shoulder, and I turn.
Karma steps into the kitchen, his long, wet hair dampening the neck of his shirt.
“A foe of mine?” Karma grabs a cup off the shelf. “Do tell.”
I hold up the kettle, and his longing look meets mine.
“That damned woman, of course.” Dendup’s voice sneers, and Karma’s eyes take on a dark edge, just for a moment. “She’s nothing but trouble.”
Lanying. My fingers clasp around the handle, and my knuckles turn white as I steady my thoughts—and the kettle.
“She said she’ll meet you in the marketplace this morning.” Dendup snorts. “Or else she’ll come to get you here.”
My eyes fix on Karma’s cup. I pour and pour while my mind searches for the right words to respond. Feeling the men’s eyes burn on me, I decide to remain quiet—for now—there’s no way they’ll let me go with her, yet.
“Let’s eat.” I sit beside Dendup, but not before I’ve piled more seasoned broiled meat on his platter with the thick spicy sauce he likes so much. I hand Karma a piece of baked bread, the sweet aroma of the melding butter complementing its salty, dense bite. And as the men satisfy their morning appetite, I sense their mood mellow with the abundance of mouthwatering dishes. Good. I sit back and relax.
I’m about to pour another round of tea when the rapid hopscotch of patter resounds in the hallway, followed by an elated cry. Found you!
It’s little sister, her hands full with candied nuts and her face smudged with something pink and gooey, beaming her brightest smile.
“Here!” She skips over to me, hands me a few sticky nuts, and deposits the rest of them on the table before Dendup.
“For you.” She licks her tiny fingers one by one. “And she says she’ll get me a new chupa too!” Her eyes wide with excitement, she turns to me. “But only if you come with us, please.” The giggle that follows her drawn out plea is the cutest ever, and I can’t resist throwing my arms around her tiny frame, so full of life again.
“Says who?” Dendup’s low, leery voice barks over the table, and I flinch at the brute tone. Little sister, on the other hand, is not impressed. She jumps over to Dendup and climbs on his knee.
“Our Han sister.” Securing her spot between a stunned Dendup and a quiet Karma, she points her grubby fingers at the doorway. “She said she would wait in the yard.”
Of course! I pull up my shoulders and turn away from my company, but it’s no use. I can’t hide the smile basking on my face. She’s good, really good.
Swoosh! A sudden gush rushes through the hallway. The heavy front door slams into the timber banister. The rigid rattle of the iron hinges is followed by the swift thud of a pair of heels strutting along the solid wood floor. All our eyes are drawn to the doorway, and I’m sure it’s her.
“Sisterrrr!” Lanying’s voice reaches the kitchen before she does. Her coat swishes behind her as she strides into the room. “So good to see you.” She throws her arms around my shoulders.
“Brothers.” With a curd nod, she acknowledges Karma and Dendup, but barely—her eyes are on me.
“Soooo.” She pinches my shoulder. “Are you up for it?” The glee in her eyes tells me it’s already a done deal.
“Up to what?” Dendup’s grumble has lost none of its brutal tone.
An icy-blue glints in Lanying’s eyes and she turns her heels in that laid-back style of hers. “To town, of course,” she says as she looks to Dendup with her face frozen in an ever-so-polite smile. “Little sister needs some new clothes.”
She pouts her ruby lips at the little girl seated on his lap and flings a quick wink my way. “And we would love for sister Nordun to come, wouldn’t we, little one?” Little sister shakes her head, her cheeks glowing a rosy red by now.
“And do you think our brothers here will let her come with us?” Lanying’s eyes thin to crescents of sapphire and her voice pitches a sweet solicitation. I turn away for a moment. My smile’s too obvious. We can all see what’s coming next.
“Oh yes, please.” Little sister’s scrawny arms disappear in the creases of Dendup’s shirt as she throws herself at his chest. “Can she come?” She stares at him with the big brown eyes of a baby fawn, the most innocent of looks I’ve ever seen.
Dendup’s jaw tightens, and he puts his hand on the little girl’s head, rubbing her wispy fuzz on top. I hold my breath as Lanying’s fingers dig into my shoulder. Om mani. Will he?
“Who’ve you got with you?” Karma’s quiet calm breaks the eager expectation between Dendup and the rest of us, releasing him from the decision that might shatter little sister’s heart. While he addresses his words at Lanying, his eyes are on me. The hint of apprehension knots my stomach. He wouldn’t think that I put her up to it, would he? I bite my lip.
“Two of my men.” The sheer determination in Lanying’s voice mirrors Karma’s quiet confidence. “Trustworthy men, for I’ve heard...” She doesn’t finish her sentence—one does not speak of danger aloud.
“Trustworthy.” Dendup’s sneer slices across the kitchen. “You?”
I take a quick step back. My mind puzzles at his demeanor. Whatever happened between Lanying and my brothers, it clearly cut deep.
“Brother.” Karma puts his hands around little sister and hauls her on his lap. “Why not let the girls here have their day of fun?” His expression is so subdued, I can’t read what he’s thinking, but my heart skips a beat at his words of approval. My toes scrape along the jagged timbers.
“It’ll be straight to Lhasa after today, some hard travel and not the best of roads.” Karma adds to his argument and the rest of us look on in high hopes. A swift glance from under my eyelashes reveals the slightest of inclination from Dendup’s head.
“Oh, go on then.” His face wrenched, Dendup utters a grumble from under his breath. “Who can refuse a cutie like this?” He tickles little sister until she squeals with delight. “Just make sure…” He hurls an obstinate look at Lanying, tinged with an edge of clear worry.
“I will.” Lanying affirms her hasty reply with a whirl from her cloak. “Come on then!” She opens her arms for little sister to jump into and off they are, while I hasten to pull on my socks and sandals. Dendup’s sour look makes me want to fly after my sisters, but I must acknowledge my elder’s consent.
“Thank you, brother,” I say, my voice muffled as I smoothen my dress. “That’s very generous of you.” My head bowed, I hear his huff. He’s still grumbling and my feet itch to get out of the door.
“Promise you’ll be careful.” Karma’s hand demands my waist as he strolls me down to the yard.
“Stay close to Lanying’s men.” He halts at the doorway and presses his warm lips on the top of my head. “I trust you.”
I open my mouth to assure his faith in me, but he’s already striding back to the kitchen, the thud of his boots echoing a staunch goodbye through the hollow hallway.
“And that, my dearest sister,” Lanying says as we walk out of the gate into town. “That is how we deal with our men.” A clever smile rolls from her lips as she tosses her long locks back in the breeze and takes little sister’s hand. “Always familiarize yourself with their weak spot.” She lifts a single eyebrow. “And use it to your advantage.” With a big swing she puts little sister on the shoulder of one of her men, the girl shrieking with joy. “And you little one, you deserve the best chuba in town today.”
I shake my head as my thoughts churn over Lanying’s former remarks.… weak spot… advantage… A little tinge of disquiet prowls my mind. She’s one skillful woman, that’s not to deny. Still, something in her words doesn’t sit right with me.
“Now I don’t know who dresses you.” Lanying hooks her arm through mine. “But little sister’s not the only one in need of some sprucing up.”
I raise my eyebrows and gaze down. What’s wrong with my clothing?
“Love the color on you but the cut…” She shakes her head. “It won’t do anymore.” I shrug. The resolute tone says it all. She’s got her mind made up and I’m down for another coat.
As the day unfolds, it’s not only another coat I’m privileged to as Lanying proves to be the most generous sister to us. Guarded closely by her two men, she steers little sister and me to what seems to be the best tailors in town. Her sense of style is impeccable and under her watchful eye, we get dressed in a luxury my body has never met.
“Now thís is your color.” Lanying’s approving hands glide along a roll of the brightest cerulean silk wool. The hue reminds me of my poppy coat, but held to the light, it’s so much more vibrant, like a slice of the highest heavens, cut straight out of the blue sky. Before I know it, I’m poked around and measured by the eager seamstress, while Lanying’s sorting for the costliest fur for the lining.
“Just because we’re on the road,” she says, a pensive look in her eyes. “That doesn’t mean we have to compromise on comfort or style—ever.” She pulls little sister near, and slides her hand over my hips, stretching the thin fabric of my underdress to reveal my curves. “What do you think, little one? Isn’t she the most gorgeous thing ever?”
The two of them burst into laughter, while my cheeks burst into flames. My hands clasp across my chest as my eyes searches for a way out, but I’m literally pinned down with nowhere to go.
“You know, sister.” Lanying’s gaze drifts over to little sister rolling around the fur. “You better own your beauty, for that’s your actual worth in this unjust world.” She takes a step back and glances her approval at me. “Nearly there.” With a stern voice, she directs the timid seamstress to a cut that’s way closer than I would have picked, but I don’t object, for I’m grateful for her company and her kind advice.
My hands run across the fur Lanying has picked, a hue of sabre black, scintillating like the darkest obsidian in the rich golden of midday sun. It’s not all Lanying’s words I’ll take to heart, but I know she’s right at one thing. Physical beauty sure wields power in this mundane world—it’s what all girls from an early age on know to be true. But it also enslaves the one who dares to depend her worth on it, as my grandmother used to say. For beauty of the body is fleeting, fading with the years of our impermanent existence.
The mind, on the other hand, that’s the only thing that will prevail, sustaining us in this life and the countless lives that follow. The quality of our mind, that’s our real worth, for it’s our only sole reliance, and therefore the only matter to truly treasure. The prodding of eager fingers at my rigid limbs and waist to get the right cut jolts me out of my musings, right back into the tailor’s stall.
It’s not until our clothes are ordered and our hair is decked out with a few corals and turquoise beads woven through that Lanying is satisfied with our appearance. Much to the relief of her guarding men, she declares it’s time for lunch. Settled in the nook of the small inn she has selected, I lean in as she orders the food in the language I’m curious to learn. To my surprise, I recognize a few of the words she pronounces so elegantly, so clear.
“So, you’re taking an interest in my language then?” Her face lifts. “Good, for you should get to know more of this word, and the language is an excellent way.” She cradles little sister on her lap, the girl’s eyes drawn from exhausted elation this morning.
“Karma got me a phrase book.” My hands search my shirt, but Lanying waves her hand at me.
“Now, sister.” Her voice lowers, and she leans in closer. “I speak a few languages myself, so I know what I’m talking about.” She puts her delicate hand on mine. “If you want to learn the foreign language, then you must take a few lovers in the foreign tongue” She leans back in her seat, her hand squeezing mine. “I can recommend it.” I feel my jaw drop and bounce up in my seat, my mind alarmed at her words. Did she just suggest…?
“Ah, there’s our food.” Lanying shuffles the plates around as little sister bobs back in her seat, no doubt awakened by the aromatic bouquet of aniseed, cinnamon, and other sweet spices filling our table.
“And by the time you’re done with Karma.” Lanying flings her head to the side. “Which should be soon.” She pauses. “I’ll find you a few suitable lovers, ones that can fulfill all your needs. Trust me.”
No way! My mind balks at the ideas she’s suggesting, but she won’t have any of it. Adding a reassuring chuckle to her argument as she fills the plates and gestures for us to eat. As the thick sauce of meat hits my palate, the most delicious of velvety sweet and sour smothers my protests and seizes all my objections for now. This food!
“See, I told you so,” Lanying says as she detects my savory delight. “Something foreign to taste is just what you need.” Om Tara. My mouth full, I can’t help but laugh. For this woman, she’s something else. “And not only for pleasure, but for your trade, too.” I raise my eyebrows at her words. “Foreign connections of the right kind are worth their weight in gold.” She licks a little juice from the corners of her mouth. “Trust me, for it has done my business very well.” With a satisfied sigh she leans back, her eyes gleaming at the sight of little sister still digging into the delicacies.
“I’ll come to visit you at your stables.” A content hiccup escapes from her lips as she puts down her empty cup. “And we’ll expand our ventures together.” She adds a dismissive wave from her hand. “Once this pilgrimage of yours is over.”
With a gobble I swallow the piece of fat chicken that’s suddenly lodged itself in the back of my throat. “I guess you know all about my pilgrimage by now,” I say, my voice dim. There’s no question, she knows—but how much?
“Oh, I do,” Lanying says, as she polishes little sister’s grimy cheeks with the hem of her sleeve, covered in grease. “And from what I hear, our brothers have got it all wrong.” She turns to me and wrinkles her nose. “It’s not your uncle you should be worried about...” A bleak grin appears on her lips. “It’s that woman, she’s got him under her spell.”
No! Her words drain the blood right out of my face and my hands clasp the edge of the table.
“Sister!” Our little companion cries out to me. “Are you alright?” Her lips tremble as she sees my dreaded expression. I hasten to put on my friendly face and mask my fear behind a faint smile.
“Of course, little one,” I say, my voice steady and clear. “Just a piece of chicken bone that got stuck here.” I put my hand on my chest and swallow until her face lifts again and she tucks herself right back in her seat.
“No need to worry yourself.” Lanying’s demeanor is unusually quiet and calm. “Once we’re in Lhasa, your brothers will take care of the situation.” I follow her glance, scanning the room, the warm orange glow of the late afternoon reflecting on the rich amber of the polished benches. “They’re good like that, especially Karma.” Her voice trails off and my heart sinks at the sound of his name. She must have sensed it, for she puts her hand on mine and shakes her head. “We’ll leave it to them, for it’s what men do. You’ll all be home safe before the big snow falls.”
I want to believe her so badly, but my stubborn mind’s throwing out the maddest of thoughts. Good at what? Taking revenge? Yielding the knife? I shiver as tears burn the rim of my eyes.
“Sure.” I gulp down my last tea in a desperate attempt to drown my ominous thoughts. “We’ll leave it to them.” A profound silence brews up between us, and my mind keeps on screaming at me. It’s what men do. But honestly, who am I trying to convince here, thinking we will leave it to them?
One look at Lanying tells me she’s not buying it either. The blue in her eyes darkens to a raven black as she dips down her chin, almost unnoticeable. Her fingers tighten around mine and right there and then we seal our silent pact. Our minds settle in an unspoken agreement.
We both finish our food, but a bitter taste has taken over my palate and I need to wash it down with plenty of tea. Little sister’s appetite turns out to be larger than her tiny frame and we’ll leave it to her to clean all the plates.
“And now…” Lanying draws out her words, as she throws her arm around little sister. “Are you ready to collect your new clothes?” The girl practically bursts with excitement and jumps from her seat.
“And sister’s clothes too!” She grabs my hand and pulls me with her, hopscotching all the way to the tailors.
There’s no doubt about it, Lanying’s pick of the vibrant, rich blue and close cut is spot on. To my surprise, it’s not only a coat that’s been tailored to my frame. Awaiting me at the jumpy seamstress, there’s also a matching sleek dress and a pair of soft leather boots to go with it.
“Oh, come on.” Lanying sighs as I put up a small protest. “You can’t be my friend and not look your best.” She smoothens my hair after I’ve changed and approves the new outfit with a cocky smile. “Our brothers will be in for a surprise.” She tugs the fur at the sleeves.
“Beautiful!” Little sister claps her hands as I twirl on demand. The entire outfit, it’s so comfortable, it must be because of its immaculate fit.
“Wé are beautiful,” I correct little sister, who’s hopping up and down in front of us, too excited to stand still in her new chuba. “And I don’t know how to thank you, sister.” My cheeks glow with gratitude. I bow my head to Lanying, for I honestly don’t know. It’s only now I realize I still go around like a female monastic, empty-handed, with no silver, or coins, or anything else to trade. Somehow I have to change that.
“Don’t be silly,” Lanying hisses in my ear. “And don’t you ever bow your head to me again.” Her sudden warm embrace takes me by surprise. “We are sisters.”
“Sisters,” I say, and my heart spills over as I hold her close.
“Just one more thing.” She puts me at arm’s length and looks me straight in the eye. “Promise me, sister, they won’t tie you down, for you are the one that governs your destiny. You are the only one that directs your fate.” She chooses her words with consideration, and I lean back into the rows of twirling wool. “They have their ways, oh so subtle, but be sure not to fall for their tricks.” Her voice stifles with emotion.
“Like today, allowing you to come with us, giving you just enough leeway to think you’re free…” She pauses and draws a sharp breath. “But trust me, they’ll reign you in—crushing you harsh and underhanded—whenever they want to.” Her round face hardens. “And when you least expect it.” She pinches her lips together to a cruel, pallid pink and my heart bleeds for her. It’s clear she’s been there, beaten and bruised, and still bears the scars of those who tried to own the very piece of her she’ll never give up.
I dig my fingers in the itchy wool and raise myself to hug her once more. “Promise,” I say, and I anchor my arms on her hips.
“Good,” she says, her eyes strangely mellow and filled with an inner glow I’ve not seen in her before. “Now let’s get your gorgeous self back to our brothers before they trash the town looking for you.”
And thus we walk home with the sun on our back and the overwhelming joy of new friendship found in my heart.