Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from Him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.
—PSALM 127:3–5
Son, comb your hair. Tuck in your shirt and put on a belt.”
These are the words I (Mona Lisa) woke up to early this Saturday morning as I overheard Kip giving Seth instructions as he prepared for his community service project. This Saturday morning’s project was part of Huntingdon College’s “Big Red Weekend”/new student orientation. Although Seth has three college semesters under his belt, he acts no differently from any other twelve-year-old boy.
We are frequently asked how our children are able to adapt to college life at such a young age. Surprisingly, it is not so much the academics that we have issues with. Our issues are with helping our kids mature. They must learn how to dress appropriately—not too casual in trendy torn jeans, yet not too nerdy, either. We want them to look stylish, modest, and nice enough that they will be taken seriously by their professors and advisers. We work hard at teaching our kids to keep up with their own laundry and hang up their clothes right out of the dryer so that they can avoid the extra chore of having to iron. Keeping a bedroom semiclean helps keep the kids organized so that they are not searching for their iPad, ID card, calculator, or driver’s permit. There are days when the newest driver misses out on getting to drive to school because of a forgotten learner’s permit or I have to give up my debit card so that they can buy lunch because of a forgotten wallet/purse. These challenges would be the same if they were attending a junior high or high school.
A “college by twelve” student is earning credit for all of their efforts. Our hope is that they will not have to be reminded to comb their hair and brush their teeth by the time they are driving independently and are on their own.
• • •
We have all heard of those “genius” kids who graduate college really early, at like ten or eleven. The stories are interesting. Many times the child has foreign parents, or is an only child, or has parents who are college professors. Then we quickly dismiss the story, not ever thinking that our kids could actually do this. Sure, they may be bright students, maybe even have 4.0 GPAs, but we could not see them graduating from college this early.
Well, this is practical advice for how the average child can start college by the age of twelve, or even eleven. Everyone in our family is of average intelligence with average IQs and average SAT/ACT scores—there are no geniuses in this bunch, just hard workers. Here is our “secret” checklist:
• If able, homeschool—not even the most prestigious private schools can give you results like this.
• Start teaching your kids to read at age four or five.
• Encourage them to read lots and lots of fun and interesting material—nothing boring.
• Talk to them often about what they want to read more about and provide additional books on those subjects (create your own themes if you like).
• Do basic math every day and skip ahead as fast as they can go. Get to prealgebra and algebra by age eight or nine. They can memorize their math facts as they are learning new concepts (e.g., do not hold them back if they get stuck on 7 x 8).
• Make them write every day, explaining spelling and grammar rules and discussing the definitions of unknown words as you edit their writing. Then they can rewrite their work, making all the necessary corrections. At first they can copy out of their favorite books (the book of Proverbs is great for character building). Then they can gradually go from a single paragraph to the five-paragraph essay.
• By age eight or nine they can be reading high school–level books in a great variety of subjects (not boring high school textbooks like most of us were forced to read). Give them real quality books. Supplementing with educational videos and TV shows always provides great family bonding time.
• Keep track of all their work and activities that are high school level so that you can put it on their transcript.
• Discuss what local college they want to attend and what kinds of courses they will want to enroll in when they get there. Do this with eight-to-ten-year-olds so that their high school courses will support what they want to major in and their personal expectations and goals are aligned with college—e.g., read anatomy books if they want to go premed or Shakespeare if they want to major in English.
• Introduce the SAT/ACT study guides by age eight or nine and sign them up to take their first exam some time after their tenth birthday. Help them set a goal to get a score above their university’s entrance requirement minimum (you can elect to not have the score reported so there is no pressure). You know your child best, so keep in mind we cannot guarantee success because each child is different. Plan ahead, because there may be a limit to the number of times they can take the test. If the score is above the minimum, you can later have it sent to the university.
• Dangle the “college carrot” by letting your kids know that as soon as they finish their high school courses and get above that required SAT/ACT score, they can start taking their first college class.
• Do not let naysayers tell you that it can’t be done. Just tell them about all those Harding kids who are doing it. Let God limit your child, not you. Your kids will amaze you with what they can accomplish if they are motivated and inspired. This is your job: to encourage and provide experiences that will inspire them.
Moms everywhere are worried about what their kids might be missing, especially homeschooling moms. This is serious business and we do not want to mess up our kids. I have always taken this job seriously. Yet, there were times where I had to rely on God’s grace and just follow my heart. There were times when I felt overwhelmed with babies coming every two and a half years and moving in the military every three. There were times where I had to ask the older homeschoolers to work on their own using solution manuals or just plain figure things out on their own so I could spend time with the little ones or collapse in bed. Without my knowing it, God was providing my kids with exactly what they needed. I did feel guilty at the time, but I was just trying to survive.
What a blessing it was when just recently, we were having dinner with Serennah and Rosannah and I asked them for their honest critique of the home education they received. Both of my daughters basically said that they learned how to learn. They learned how to find their own answers. They learned how to research. They learned that if they got the wrong answer, it was okay, and to keep searching for the right one. They learned what it was like to make mistakes and then fix them.
So my answer to the mother who asks me about the holes in her children’s education is just do your best to teach your kids to be independent learners and they will be able to fill in those holes on their own. You can rely on God’s grace for the rest.