Don’t tell me it hasn’t happened to you. Everyone is discussing a celebrity, politician, or somebody you don’t know but whom you fear is famous. They laugh gleefully whenever someone adds yet another wise insight or heartwarming anecdote about this esteemed individual. And you haven’t a clue who this person is.
Whenever you face this daunting situation, use a pretty slick Little Trick a friend from Chicago, Robin Dawson, showed me. She had invited me to the opening of a private library specializing in American history books. Robin and I found ourselves in a circle of literary types, sipping their champagne and discussing William Manchester. My thoughts raced. . . .
Manchester? Manchester? Sounds like everybody should know who this esteemed dude is. But—gulp—I have no idea. Should I ask? No, I’d sound dumb. Should I fake it? No. Because if it becomes evident later that I’m clueless, they’ll think I’m a ditz.
I decided that if I listened real hard, maybe it would dawn on me partway through the conversation who he is. But nothing gave me a hint. I feared it was only minutes before my ignoble ignorance would be revealed to all. I’d lose any speck of status with this cultured crowd.
I was relieved when Robin nudged me, indicating she was as clueless as I. Then Robin tapped the person next to her and whispered something to him. They stepped aside and spoke softly for a few seconds. When they returned, Robin leaned over and murmured in my ear, “Manchester was a historian in the second half of the twentieth century. He wrote about twenty books on the Kennedys and lots of other stuff.”
“Whew! Thanks, Robin,” I whispered back.
At the time, I was just thanking her for the heads-up on Manchester. In retrospect, I was also thanking her for Little Trick 38, which I have used to save face countless clueless times.
Little Trick #38
Whisper “Who?” or “What?” to Another Listener
When you are trapped in the sticky situation of not knowing who or what the heck everyone is talking about, pull one person aside and confide in her. Ask for information on what or whom they are discussing.
Don’t worry that this individual will think you are naive. She will be more honored you chose her for the consultation—and, incidentally, impressed by your tactic.
Whether you’re job hunting, friend seeking, spouse searching, VIP schmoozing, or pursuing prospective customers, it is important to mingle and meet as many people as you can. But what if some bore corners you and won’t let you go?