“Okay, sister. Spill it. I want to know everything.”
Brenda barged past Kirsten the second she’d opened the door and headed to the kitchen. Kirsten trailed behind and watched in amusement as Brenda deposited the groceries she’d brought onto the counter and started to rummage through the liquor cabinet.
“Geez, you’re impatient.” Kirsten laughed as she put the already marinated chicken in the refrigerator.
“Are you fucking kidding me? How could I not be? You tell me that you have feelings for another woman after being married to a man for years and that you told her how you felt and spent the night.” Brenda handed her one of the drinks she’d fixed and took a sip from the other.
“But we didn’t—” she tried to interrupt.
Brenda held up her hand to prevent her from saying anything more. “Then I see you two dancing all sexy and seductively on the dance floor—while making out, might I add—and you go back to her place last night and, I presume, spent the night again.”
Kirsten nodded. “Let’s go get in the pool. I promise to tell you everything I can.”
Brenda and Kirsten changed into their bathing suits and headed outside with their drinks in hand. Once they were safely on their rafts, Brenda waved her hand at her and nodded. “Go.”
Kirsten laughed at Brenda’s behavior but began her story. “What can I say? I finally know what’s been missing in my life. You know how you told me I read too many romance novels because I kept longing for fireworks and butterflies in my stomach? Well, I can tell you firsthand now that type of passion does exist. Jordan has provoked those feelings and so many more, I have a hard time describing it. And it’s not just from her kissing or touching me. The things she says to me…she’s so romantic, Brenda. She has the most sincere look on her face when she tells me how beautiful I am or how much she cares for me, and she tells me these things while looking directly into my eyes.”
“I know we haven’t known each other for that long, but I never saw this spark in your eyes when you were with John. I’m thrilled for you, honey. Jordan seems like a nice woman.”
“She really is, but it’s more than that. When she looks into my eyes, it’s like she’s reaching into my soul. I swear I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I just look at her, and my whole body feels like it will go up in flames. And, boy, can she kiss. I honestly don’t know how much longer I can stand not making love to her, but it’s important for her to take it slow, so I have to hold myself back.”
“You’re not nervous about making love to another woman for the first time? I know I was scared out of my mind the first time I had sex with a woman, and I’ve been a lesbian all my life.”
“No, I don’t think nervous is the word to describe it. Maybe anxious? Excited? I don’t think I’m nervous because I’ve never wanted anything this much, and I know she’ll be patient with me. I think she may be nervous, but I’m not.”
“I truly am very happy for you, Kirsten. I’m still a little concerned, but I am happy for you.”
“Why are you concerned?”
“Well, to be honest, I’m afraid you’re jumping into this pretty quickly. I know you and John have had your issues, but you just told him two nights ago that you wanted a divorce, and now you’re ready to have sex and start a relationship with a woman who hasn’t had a girlfriend in a very long time. I’m afraid you’re going to get hurt.”
“Oh, Bren, I love you, and your concern means a lot to me. But from the moment I met her, it seems like we’ve had a connection. I feel like I’ve known her all of my life, and she said the same thing to me. Some people aren’t lucky enough to have this type of bond with another person, but we are, and we do.”
“Okay, I trust your judgment. Where is your dream woman anyway?”
“She’s having coffee with Alex this afternoon. I imagine they’re having a conversation much like this one.” Kirsten chuckled and began paddling to the steps. “Come on, let’s get a refill and fire up the grill.”
*
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Alex was laughing hysterically. “I’ve never seen you this wild over another woman, not even the piece of shit that doesn’t deserve mentioning.”
Jordan couldn’t help laughing, too. Alex was right—she’d never felt this way about anyone else, not even Kelly. She sipped her iced mocha while she waited for Alex to settle down. “Are you finished?”
Alex was wiping tears from her eyes as her laughter turned into fits of giggles. “Not even close. So, let me get this straight. She wants to make love to you, but you want to wait. She kisses you like there’s no tomorrow, and you still don’t sleep with her. She comes to bed last night wearing a sexy little number, and you still didn’t have sex with her. Aren’t you about to come apart? Pun intended by the way.”
“Very funny, Alex. To answer your question, yes, I nearly came last night with her sitting on my lap wearing nothing but a sexy nightie and a smile. I almost broke and made love to her, but she was the one to put on the brakes. I swear she has me more turned around than any of the women I’ve ever slept with. She turns my brain to mush with just one look. She’s by far the sexiest woman I’ve ever been with—hell, that I’ve ever seen. She drives me insane.”
“I’ll just bet she does.” Alex got serious, which caught her off guard. “Are you ready for this? I mean, I know I’ve been on your case about settling down, but are you ready to forsake all others? I don’t know Kirsten very well, but what I do know of her, I really like. You’re my best friend, J, but if you do anything to hurt her, I’ll kick your ass into next week.”
Jordan laughed. “Brenda told me pretty much the same thing last night. I have to admit that I wasn’t looking to settle down, but Kirsten is very special to me. I would never do anything to hurt her, and I can’t imagine another woman could make me feel the way I do when I’m with her. I’m ready, Al, but…” She glanced away, uncertain.
“But you’re still afraid. I understand, sweetie, I really do. But you can’t compare Kirsten to that asshole you were with before. Kirsten cares for you. I see the way she looks at you. She can’t hide it, and neither can you. Don’t make Kirsten pay for Kelly’s idiocy. It’s not fair to her or to you. You deserve one another.”
“I know she’s nothing like Kelly, but how do I get past this fear?”
“You always say actions speak louder than words. Let her prove it to you. So far, she’s confirmed to you how special she is and how much you mean to her. It was you she went to after her dinner with John the other night. And she was the one who took care of you after you injured your ankle. You have to trust her.”
She took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “You’re right. I just have to try to let it go and trust her. Thanks, Al.”
“Anytime, honey, that’s what best friends are for.”