Sahan escaped from the restaurant floor and ducked into the kitchen with relief. He’d been waiting on a group of young men who were too drunk and too loud to be good customers.
‘They’ve gone,’ he said. ‘Didn’t leave too much of a mess.’ He pulled a face. ‘Didn’t leave much of a tip either.’
The cook was sitting in a corner, making use of a well earned break to check his messages. Through the open door to the pantry opposite, Sahan could see Deepthi was doing a stock check.
The cook looked up from his phone. He had a plate of singed garlic naan beside him. ‘You eaten?’
‘No. I’m starving.’ Sahan grabbed a plate and started serving himself. ‘It’s quiet in there at the moment.’ He felt grumpy and on edge. Trying to keep calm whilst being heckled and messed around by drunk customers was one of the biggest downsides to the job. Most of the time, he reminded himself that being a waiter was a temporary thing. But tonight had been especially bad. If he got on the engineering grad scheme he was interviewing for next week, he could stop working here. Forever. It wouldn’t be a moment too soon.
‘Your friend was looking for you,’ said the cook.
‘What friend?’ Had Nate come to see him? Why would he?
‘The driver guy.’
Sahan glowered. ‘That guy is not my friend. Just because we happen to come from the same country, doesn’t make us mates.’
‘He gives me the creeps,’ Deepthi observed. She came to the doorway of the pantry and leaned against the frame, clipboard by her side. ‘He’s always in here, trying to talk to me. He just can’t take a hint and go away.’
‘I think he’s lonely,’ Sahan said, feeling he should at least try to be sympathetic to the other man.
‘That’s no excuse,’ said Deepthi. ‘The way he looks at me… pretty much the same way you’re looking at your food.’ She gave a theatrical shudder. ‘Ugh.’
‘If it’s any consolation, he gives me the creeps too,’ said Sahan.
The shift in the cook’s gaze alerted him before Kemasiri even made a noise. Sahan turned.
‘Look, it’s Mr Colombo Seven,’ said Kemasiri. His grin was not reflected in his eyes. ‘Hello, beautiful Deepthi. Stock take day, is it?’
Deepthi gave Sahan a look that said ‘see what I mean’. ‘Yeah,’ she said weakly and went back to work, turning her back on them.
Kemasiri looked at Sahan, gestured towards Deepthi and made an appreciative face. Sahan ignored him.
Mr Ghosh came in from the main restaurant. ‘Sahan. Customers. Get in there.’
Relieved to have an excuse to leave, Sahan put down the food and went back out again. He would eat later. He’d lost his appetite anyhow.
It was clearly the night for rowdy groups. Sahan ushered the last lot out of the restaurant and pulled the blinds down. It was past their normal closing time. Behind him, Mr Ghosh moved around gathering tablecloths for the linen hamper. Sahan grabbed a cloth and started to wipe down the chairs and stack them on the tables.
‘You get off, Sahan,’ said Mr Ghosh. ‘Tell Deepthi to get in here and help me with the hoovering.’
He didn’t need telling twice. He finished the table he was doing and went into the back to grab his coat and the bag of food the cook would have left for him. It was quiet in the back. The cooks had left a while ago. Deepthi was probably still in the stockroom. Bags in hand, he went across. When he reached the door, he stopped dead.
Kemasiri was in the stockroom. He had one arm up, leaning against the shelving in an exaggerated casual pose. Effectively trapped between him and the shelves behind her was Deepthi, chin up, eyes moving. When she spotted Sahan, a look of profound relief passed over her face.
Sahan saw the look in Deepthi’s eyes and felt a surge of anger. ‘What’s going on?’ He stepped into the stockroom, ready to pull Kemasiri out by his greasy hair.
Kemasiri didn’t move his arm, but looked over his shoulder. Deepthi took the opportunity to dodge past him.
‘You okay?’ Sahan said, as she ducked past him.
She nodded tersely. ‘Thank you.’ She turned and shot a furious look at Kemasiri.
Kemasiri spread his hands. ‘What?’ he said. ‘We were having a friendly chat, weren’t we? What’s wrong with that?’
Deepthi’s face told Sahan everything he needed to know. He turned back to Kemasiri.
‘Don’t you dare come near her again, understand?’
‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’
‘Don’t bullshit me, Kemasiri. You stay away from Deepthi, or I’ll tell her father. Trust me. You do not want to upset Mr G.’
‘No,’ said Deepthi, from behind him. ‘You don’t.’
Kemasiri narrowed his eyes. ‘You should be careful going around accusing innocent people of things.’ He looked at his watch. ‘Anyway, my shift is over. Get out of my way so that I can ask Ghosh for my money.’
Sahan backed out of the stock room and let Kemasiri pass. As soon as the other man had disappeared into the main restaurant, Sahan turned to Deepthi. ‘You’re sure you’re okay? He didn’t try anything?’
She nodded. She was still clutching her clipboard to her. She looked down at it and lowered her arms. ‘No. He didn’t. Although, if you hadn’t showed up…’ She looked up again. ‘Thanks Sahan.’ She reached out and put a hand on his arm.
The contact made him flinch. ‘I wouldn’t like to see my sister being intimidated like that,’ he said, moving his arm out of the way.
‘Right.’ Deepthi’s brow furrowed. ‘Don’t tell my father,’ she said. ‘He’s so overprotective, if he hears…’
‘I won’t tell him,’ said Sahan. ‘But maybe you should. That guy might try it again.’
‘You think?’ Her frown deepened.
‘I do.’
‘Deepthi. Where are you?’ Mr Ghosh marched in from the restaurant. His eyes darted from Deepthi to Sahan and back again. ‘What is going on here? You.’ He pointed at Sahan. ‘Why haven’t you left?’
‘I’m just going.’ Sahan caught Deepthi’s eye and nodded towards Mr Ghosh.
She sighed. ‘Tha,’ she said. ‘There’s something I have to tell you.’
Sahan left them to it and left the shop through the back door.
Soma hurried, not wanting to be late. Louie, now fully recovered and delighted to be out and about, waved his arms around and giggled as the pram bounced. Madam had adjusted the pram so that Louie now sat semi upright. He seemed to prefer that to lying down. It was the first time they’d been out since Louie fell ill and Soma half expected to get to the park and find that Sahan hadn’t come. She hadn’t dared answer the phone during the week, and then it was the weekend. What if he thought she was staying away on purpose? What if he had given up waiting for her?
When she saw him standing by their usual park bench, doing something on his phone, her knees nearly dissolved with relief. He looked up as she approached and the look on his face told her that she needn’t have worried. He had turned up for her every day and would carry on doing so.
‘You came,’ he said, grinning at her. No one had ever looked so pleased to see her before. She felt warm. The tension that had gripped her for the past few days finally started to unravel.
‘I’m so sorry. Louie was ill. That time when you called—’
He raised a hand. ‘I know. I realised when Yamuna answered the phone. I know you weren’t avoiding me.’ He lowered his hand, slowly.
‘I wouldn’t do that.’ She wondered if it would be okay to take his hand. They had met so often, and sat together, walked together, but they had never touched. It seemed… too presumptuous. Too much. ‘I wouldn’t do that,’ she repeated.
They stared at each other. And something changed. A barrier she hadn’t even been aware of dissolved.
‘I will always come to the park,’ he said, slowly. ‘If I possibly can, I will always come.’ His gaze was intense, as though he wanted to be sure she understood him. ‘Always.’
She knew what he was telling her. Happiness flooded through her, worries washed away. This was something real. He felt the same way about her as she did about him. For the first time in years, here was something that could genuinely make her happy. Something right. Oh, she knew it couldn’t last. He would tire of her soon enough, because he was a man. Men were unpredictable. Even her stepfather, always a little frightening, had seemed like a good husband for her mother until he’d started drinking in earnest.
Although she didn’t think Sahan would stop being this kind, gentle individual, she could never be sure. But for now, he liked her and that was good enough for her.
She smiled at him, happiness seeping from every pore, and he smiled back.
Louie blew a raspberry, his current favourite pastime. The spell broke and Sahan laughed. ‘Glad to see you’re feeling better, little one,’ he said, and tickled Louie with a finger.
The baby giggled and squirmed. Sahan looked up. ‘I’ve got some new books…’
She couldn’t sit next to him. Not today. She couldn’t be so close to him and not touch him. She would never be able to concentrate on a book. ‘Can we just walk today?’ she said. ‘Louie is awake and… it would be nice to walk.’
He nodded. ‘Sure.’ He strode along next to her as she pushed the pram. After a few moments, he put his hand on the pram handle. ‘Shall I push him?’ he said.
Surprised, she let him, moving out of the way. Then, in a fit of boldness, she put her gloved hand on his and left it there. He looked across at her and then away. Neither of them mentioned it.
‘I should get a mobile phone,’ she said. She had been thinking about this a lot in the past few days. The system with the phone worked well enough when Madam wasn’t around, but when she was… ‘You can call me sometimes then. And leave a message. Like if you can’t come to the park. And I can call you.’
‘That’s a very good idea,’ he said. ‘And if Louie is ill, you can tell me, so I won’t have to stand around in the park like a spare part.’
‘I… don’t know much about phones,’ she said.
‘How do you keep in touch with your family?’ he said. ‘Don’t you call them?’
Hah. Who would she keep in touch with? ‘I… write to them,’ she lied. ‘Not that often.’
He didn’t seem to find that unusual. ‘Oh, okay. Well, what sort of phone do you want?’
‘I only have about twenty pounds to spend on it. I need to have money to make calls too.’
‘That should be plenty,’ he said. ‘On Monday, instead of coming to the park, we can go to Princes Avenue. There’s bound to be somewhere there you can buy a cheap phone. I’ll help you choose.’ He stopped and frowned. ‘Actually, maybe Princes Avenue is too close to Yamuna’s work. Let’s go to Chanterlands instead.’
She had no idea where he was talking about. Seeing her expression, he explained, giving her directions. To do this, he had to move his hand out from under hers. When he had finished explaining and they resumed walking, he reached for her hand and placed it on the pram handle, underneath his own. And Soma thought her heart would explode with happiness.
That weekend, Kemasiri was not at the restaurant. Mr Ghosh must have fired him after he heard about the incident with Deepthi. Mr Ghosh was in a bad mood because he had to drive the takeaway orders out himself. It was a difficult night and Sahan was glad when the restaurant shut for the night, so that he could grab his bag of food and leave.
He was coming out of the alleyway when Kemasiri sprang out in front of him.
‘You.’ Kemasiri stopped him by pushing a palm against his chest. Even at this distance, Sahan could smell the alcohol mixed in with his cigarette breath. ‘You’ll pay for what you did to me, Colombo Seven. I will make you wish you’d never crossed me.’
Sahan tried to keep going. ‘It had nothing to do with me. You tried to mess with the boss’s daughter.’
‘She wouldn’t have run squealing to her father if you hadn’t made her.’ Kemasiri stepped in front of him again. ‘You couldn’t mind your own business, could you? You think you’re so much better than me? Back home, you’ve got all the privileges, but over here, we’re the same.’ He closed the space between them and jabbed a finger at Sahan’s chest. ‘I may be just a driver, but you, Colombo Seven, are just a waiter. You think I can’t hurt you? You think you’re too big for that?’
Sahan felt a stab of alarm. He weighed up his chances if the other man got violent. He hoped things wouldn’t come to that. Kemasiri jabbed him in the chest again. Sahan batted his hand away. ‘Look, I’m sorry. I have to go catch a bus.’
‘Scared of me, Fancy Boy?’ Kemasiri squared up to him. Too close, too ugly to ignore.
Over Kemasiri’s shoulder, Sahan could see his bus approaching. The sooner he got on it, the sooner he could put some distance between himself and this odious twerp.
‘Yes, yes, I’m scared of you,’ he said and pushed the other man out of the way. He pushed harder than he’d intended and Kemasiri stumbled backwards. Sahan carried on walking.
‘Everyone has their secrets, Fancy Boy,’ Kemasiri shouted after him. ‘I will find out yours. And I will destroy you. This isn’t over.’
‘Oh yes it is.’ Sahan muttered. He kept walking and hoped to goodness that he was right.
Soma ran the conversation with Sahan through her mind again as she prepared for Louie’s bedtime. Madam had brought Louie back from the bath and dressed him, while Soma tidied up the room, putting toys away and collecting muslin burp cloths or bibs for the wash. This was one of the few times of day when she and Madam overlapped in their care of Louie. Soma tried to stay out of the way as much as possible.
The phone rang. Instinctively, she counted the rings. It reached three and kept ringing. It wasn’t Sahan then. Madam, looking harassed, gave an exasperated tut and put Louie in the cot. The baby immediately protested, so Soma drifted across to calm him down.
‘Soma.’ Madam returned, holding out a phone. ‘It’s the agency. They want to speak to you.’
The bottom dropped out of her world. They knew. Somehow they had found out her secret and they were going to send her home. She couldn’t breathe.
‘Soma.’ Madam gestured for her to take the phone.
Adrenaline kicked in and saved her, just as it had done on the flight over. Trying to keep her face from betraying her fear, she took the phone. ‘Hello?’
‘Is that Somavathi?’ said a woman’s voice.
‘Yes.’
‘This is Ira from the agency. You met me in Sri Lanka when we interviewed you.’
They had never met. She was talking about Somavathi. Panic rose. She thought fast.
‘Yes. I remember, miss.’
‘I wanted to check that you were all right. We don’t normally do this, but your family said you hadn’t been in touch and they were worried about your safety… Are you being treated well?’
It took a few seconds for this to make sense. Somavathi’s family must have been so worried about the lack of response to the letters that they got in touch with the agency. They were checking on her. If they thought she was in danger, they might try to come and rescue her. First, she had to convince the company that she was fine. ‘Oh yes, I’m well,’ she said. Then, remembering that Madam was listening, she added, ‘Madam treats me very well.’
‘You haven’t been threatened in any way? Your passport is still with you? Just say yes or no.’
‘Yes. Yes. I am happy here.’
There was a small sigh on the other end of the line. ‘Your family say that you haven’t been in touch…’
Her stomach twisted. She was hurting someone. But she couldn't do anything without risking this fragile new life she’d built. She couldn’t do the right thing, because it meant her being sent back to hell. ‘I… don’t want to. I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I don’t want to write or call.’
A pause. ‘Okay. I will let them know that you are safe and unharmed. That is all I can do.’
‘Thank you.’
‘Please can you hand the phone back to Mrs Gamage.’
She obediently gave the handset back to Madam and sat down next to Louie’s cot. As she lifted the little boy onto her lap and gave him his bottle, she hoped that Madam wouldn't ask too many questions.
Luckily for her, by the time she had sung Louie to sleep, Madam had gone downstairs. What could she say if Madam wanted details? She could make up a lie about how she and her mother didn’t get along. Or maybe even tell the truth of sorts about her stepfather… but that would lead to more questions. She had shut Jaya and her sad life out of her mind now and she didn’t want to remember it. She rubbed her face and sighed.
She could only hope that Madam had forgotten all about the phone call by the next time she saw her.
If only she could do the same.
Sahan spotted her before she saw him. He watched Soma manoeuvre the pram across the road and back onto the pavement. It had only been three days since he’d last seen her, but he’d missed her.
She was wrapped up in layers of clothing again, despite the weather warming up. It wasn’t quite the weather for shorts and t-shirt yet, but Soma looked like she was prepared for a blizzard. He watched her nod to people and smile shyly when they said hello. Even well wrapped up, she looked small compared to the people she passed. She wasn’t that much shorter, but she had a certain compactness about her, as though she was trying to take up as little space in the world as possible. It made him want to put his arms around that space and protect her.
Their last meeting had changed something. He wasn’t sure what had happened, but suddenly his doubts had shrunk to insignificance. For the first time since the Tamsin incident, he had touched someone and not felt anything other than happiness. Holding her hand felt… right. Even the insistent tug of wanting in his stomach had felt okay. Not shameful, not wrong, but normal. He was in love with this girl. He was allowed to want her.
Of course, his family would go ballistic if they found out. They would say that she was just looking for a way to climb up the social ladder by marrying him. But, he reminded himself, he was an adult now. When he finished his course, he would be a graduate. With any luck, he would get a job and be able to support himself, and maybe… but he was getting ahead of himself. He didn’t know how Soma felt. She seemed to be shy and frightened and in need of looking after. But what if that was all she wanted? What if his family’s views had a grain of truth? Socially, they were poles apart. She was a pretty girl, but one with no prospects apart from her job as a nanny. Her fear of Yamuna finding out about their relationship, innocent as it was, was evidence of that. What if he was her insurance policy?
As he always did when this thought intruded, Sahan pushed it away. There were things he needed to think about – the fact that his course was coming to an end, the jobs he was applying for which were based miles away, the social strata that lay between them. He would have to face them eventually, but not now. What he had with Soma, whatever it was, was too new and precious for practical reality to ruin. Not yet.
Across the way, Soma spotted him and her face transformed from worried to delighted. She smiled and gave him a tiny wave, not quite removing her hand from the pram. He stepped away from the bus shelter he’d been standing in and walked up to join her.
The street was busy, but there was room enough on the pavement for them to walk side by side. When the sun came out, it would be busier still as the students from the university ventured further afield in the good weather. Sahan liked this area of Hull. It was a good distance away from the city centre, closer to Cottingham and the university than to town. The street was crammed with independent shops and cafes, which, despite the preponderance of tanning salons and nail bars, made it more lively than the city centre with its chain stores. People bustled about, often in huge family groups, which made it noisy and friendly. It reminded him a little of Colombo.
He took Soma into a shop that sold unlocked phones and explained to the bored man behind the counter what they needed. Soon they were standing on the pavement, Sahan holding the pram, pushing a cranky Louie back and forth while Soma put away her purse. A couple of elderly ladies walking past smiled at him.
‘It’s nice how the men do their share of looking after the little ‘uns these days. Our Pete never did a nappy with any of ours,’ one said to the other as they passed.
Sahan looked from Soma to Louie. They did look like a little family, the three of them. The idea should have horrified him, but oddly, it didn’t. Soma was changing him, he reflected. Somehow making him more himself.
She finished fiddling around with her bag and smiled at him. ‘Will you show me how to use it?’ she said.
‘Don’t you know? I thought everyone had phones these days, even in Matara.’
She shook her head. ‘Not me.’ They started walking again, heading back the way they’d come. ‘We were too poor for that sort of thing,’ she said. ‘There was a phone at the shop though, you could use it if you paid a few rupees.’
To Sahan, whose parents had had to confiscate his phone during exam season, this seemed incredible. What different worlds they came from. ‘That’s…’ he shook his head. ‘I can’t imagine that.’
Soma laughed. ‘I know.’
He took the phone from her and turned it on. When they’d walked a little way, she said, ‘How is your job search going? Did you send off that application you were preparing last week?’
‘Yes.’
She seemed to be thinking about something for a few minutes. ‘Is it very far away, that job?’
‘Quite far, but only a few hours on the train, really.’ He would be able to come back and visit her at the weekends, but it would be awkward. Soma wouldn’t be able to disappear for the day with him every weekend. And she certainly wouldn’t be able to come and visit him without raising eyebrows.
‘Oh,’ said Soma. The smile dropped from her face. Her shoulders dropped a fraction and she seemed to shrink into her coat.
‘But we can talk to each other, now that you have a phone,’ he said. ‘Besides, I haven’t got the job yet. You never know… I might not.’
‘But that wouldn’t be good either,’ said Soma. ‘You need to get a job to stay here. If it’s far away, then…’ She leaned forward to fuss with Louie’s blanket, leaving the sentence hanging in the air. A reminder of the frailty of their relationship.
‘We will manage,’ he said, with more reassurance than he felt. ‘We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.’
She didn’t look at him, but carried on walking. He wished he could magic away his problems and pretend, just for a day, that everything was going to be okay.
The traffic on the road next to them was steady. Out of the corner of his eye, Sahan noticed the cars slowing down but didn’t think anything of it. A horn beeped. He turned his head. A black car was pulling slowly past, despite the road being clear ahead. Odd. Perhaps they were lost. Thinking to help, he glanced inside the car… and froze. Kemasiri sat in the driving seat, staring out at him as the car crawled past. Seeing him look, Kemasiri nodded. A thin smirk lit his features and the car sped up and pulled away.
Sahan felt a chill run through him. He didn’t like Kemasiri at the best of times, but that smirk… that frightened him. Kemasiri had recognized him. He had seen him with Soma, pushing Louie’s pram, so he couldn’t claim they’d merely bumped into each other. Everyone has secrets. Now Kemasiri knew his. The smirk suggested that he was planning to use the information somehow. What if he knew some way to get in touch with his family?
‘Sahan?’ said Soma.
He realised he had stopped walking. He looked at Soma’s worried face. He couldn’t frighten her with his crazy suspicions. ‘Sorry,’ he said. ‘I got distracted for a minute.’
They walked along, chatting. He demonstrated how to use the phone and put his own number into the contacts under S. He then swapped with her, giving her the phone and taking the pram again, so that she could practice calling him.
Finally, they reached the house, walked past the front door that Sahan always used and came to a halt by the garage.
‘I… will go in here,’ Soma said, gesturing to the entrance that Sahan knew led to the garage. You could enter the kitchen through the garage that way, without having to lift the pram over awkward steps. ‘Will I see you tomorrow?’
‘I can call you this evening,’ he said. ‘After nine o’clock… if you like.’
She beamed. ‘Oh. Of course. With my phone, you can call me.’
‘That is the idea.’
She flushed a little, adorably. ‘I would like that very much.’
‘In that case, I’ll speak to you later.’
Sahan stopped at the side gate and watched her take the pram up the sloping path. He was glad she didn’t suggest he come in. Going into his cousin’s house without her knowledge felt too great a betrayal. It also made an unwelcome link between Soma and his life back in Sri Lanka. But if he was serious about how he felt, he would have to let her into his other world sometimes. It was too great a leap to think of introducing Soma to his family, but perhaps they could do more than just walk around a park. Maybe they could have one day, when they forgot the world and pretended it all okay. ‘What are you doing this Saturday?’ he called, suddenly. ‘I know that Yamuna gives you Saturday off.’
Soma frowned. Her gaze did a quick sweep of the street behind him, as though checking for spies. ‘I will stay in and watch television. As always,’ she said.
‘Come to York with me,’ he said. ‘We’ll catch a bus and go and sightseeing.’
She looked worried. Scared, even. He had a sudden wave of emotion. He wanted to cocoon her, keep her safe. ‘Don’t worry. I’ll be with you. You’ll be perfectly safe.’
‘But—’
‘You can’t spend all the time in that house by yourself. You’ll go mad.’ He smiled. ‘Come on. It’ll be fun. I’ll text you the bus times. You’ll be back home in time for Louie’s bedtime.’
She pushed the pram back to the gate, so that she could speak in a low whisper. ‘What will I tell Madam?’
‘Say you’re being adventurous and going into town to do some shopping.’
‘She might offer to take me. She sometimes does.’
He grinned. ‘No, she won’t. They’re going to Sheffield this Saturday. I know because I was supposed to go with them. So, you’ll be in the house alone all day.’
She fussed with Louie’s blankets for a minute, not looking at him.
‘I won’t let anything happen to you,’ he said. ‘I promise.’
When she looked back up at him, her eyes were huge and trusting. ‘Okay,’ she said. ‘Let us do that.’ She glanced back at Louie. ‘He’s going to wake up and want his food in a minute. I must go in.’
‘I’ll call you tonight,’ he said.
‘I would like that.’ She gave him a happy grin and turned back towards the garage.
He watched her disappear through the wicket door into the garage before he set off for the bus stop. The warm glow he always felt after spending time with Soma buoyed his steps. By the time he got home, he’d forgotten all about seeing Kemasiri that afternoon.