Soma knew from the knock on the door that it was Madam. And she knew that she was in trouble.
‘Soma. Open this door at once.’
Her hands shook as she dragged away the chair and pulled back the bolt. What use was a bolted bedroom, when he could wait for her by the garage? She turned the doorknob, but instead of opening the door, retreated back to sit on her bed.
Madam pushed the door open and stood in the doorway. ‘Did he force his way into the house?’
Soma tried to speak, but what could she say? Who would believe her? Her own mother hadn’t listened when she tried to tell her about her stepfather, why would Madam take her word over Kemasiri’s?
Even if Madam was different, even if they did believe her, what good would it do? He would tell them she wasn’t the real Somavathi and the enormity of her deception would come out. She would be sent to prison in a cold cell in England somewhere. ‘I’m sorry.’ Tears rolled unchecked down her face. ‘I’m sorry.’
Madam frowned. ‘Is that a yes or a no? Did he force his way in?’
She couldn’t go to prison. This was her life now. She couldn’t lose it like this. If she wanted to keep it, she had to let Kemasiri get away with it. Soma shook her head.
Although she couldn’t look at Madam’s face, the sharp intake of breath told Soma everything. ‘So you let him in. How long has this been going on?’
Her chest clenched. Her arms trembled. She said nothing.
‘Look at me, Soma. Don’t lie to me. How long has this been going on?’ Madam’s voice was quivering with anger.
She looked up and into Madam’s hard expression and a small hope that she’d not even been aware of, died.
‘I know you’ve had a boyfriend for a while,’ Madam said. ‘I know about your phone. I thought you were conscientious enough to keep your private affairs away from my son.’ Her voice lost its hard edge. ‘Soma, I am disappointed in you.’
Somehow, that was worse.
‘Madam I—’ Soma looked down at her hands, twisting together on her lap. She couldn’t mention Sahan without dragging him into this whole mess. He wouldn’t want her now anyway. She would be sent home and she would never see him again. ‘Are you going to send me back?’ There was nowhere for her to go.
‘I haven’t decided what to do with you, yet,’ Madam said.
Soma looked up. ‘Louie?’ He would need his food soon. And if he had the banana that had been set aside for his meal, he would need a bath soon, too. ‘Is Louie okay? Does he want his food?’
Yamuna drew a breath. ‘Louie is fine.’ She looked at Soma for a moment, her head to one side. ‘Take a few minutes to get yourself together,’ she said, her voice less angry now. ‘Then come down.’ With that, she turned and went downstairs.
Soma bolted the door again. The difficulty of her situation was becoming clearer. If he couldn’t blackmail her into sleeping with him, then Kemasiri would tell Madam her secret, or an embellished version of it. She had no doubt at all that Madam would believe him.
But if she gave in to Kemasiri’s demands, there would be no end. There had to be another way. But where could she go? There was no miraculous passport delivered into her hands this time. Her first thought was Sahan, but what could he do? He was a student. His parents had money, but Sahan didn’t. His parents would never allow him to shelter a servant girl, let alone one who was in trouble with the law.
She reached into her cardigan pocket for her phone. It wasn’t there. A few minutes of frantic searching later, she remembered that Kemasiri had snatched it from her. Had he thrown it down when he assaulted her? Was it somewhere in the kitchen? Or had he taken it? This thought made her stomach clench. Her link with Sahan, the only way he could contact her, was in Kemasiri’s pocket. It felt like a violation almost as bad as the physical one.
There had to be a way out. She had come this far, she must be able to think of something. She was shaking violently now. She climbed into bed. Pulling her knees up to her chest, she rested her head on her kneecaps and tried to think things through. Despite her best efforts, Madam didn’t like her. She didn’t know why, but she knew it as a fact. Madam thought she’d been having an affair with Kemasiri. Madam was going to send her home. If she were sent home, what would happen?
She had some money now, she could start again, get a job at a sewing mill like she had originally planned. Only now, instead of a necklace to pawn, she would actually have foreign money she could use to pay her rent for the first few weeks. Maybe being sent home wasn’t such a terrible thing. But how soon would it happen? She had some money in the bag under her bed, but how did she get the rest of her money from the bank? When Madam had shown her how to use a cash point, she had also explained about there being a limit to how much she could take out. She would have to go into the bank itself to get the rest. And then where could she keep it? The idea of walking around with that much money on her person was terrifying.
What if Kemasiri told Madam the truth about her? Then what? Again, she was sure Madam was not her friend. She would hand her over to the police without blinking an eye. For a minute, she wondered if she could appeal to her employer’s husband for help. Mr Gamage was a distant figure whom she avoided if she could. He seemed like a nice man, but he would always listen to his wife. She thought back to that one moment of true connection she had had with him, when, trapped by Kemasiri, she had looked up and made eye contact. He had seen her. Really seen her. He had saved her, but then she’d lied to him. He might have offered her sympathy, but she’d shut the door on that when she denied being attacked. He wouldn’t step up to defend her corner if his wife wanted to go to the police. No, there would be no help from there.
She could run. She had a bag packed and a small amount of money at the ready. But she didn’t know where she’d go. And she couldn’t bear the thought of leaving Sahan. She beat the heel of her hand against her forehead. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She should have kept her distance from people and not got attached. Why had she fallen in love with him? It was a stupid thing to do. Now she had ties that were difficult to sever.
Soma groaned. The only person who could help her was Sahan. The idea of being sent away was bad, but the idea of being separated from Sahan was unbearable. Tears welled up again. What would Sahan do when he found out about all this? Madam was bound to tell him. He would believe that all the while she was spending time getting to know him, she had also been seeing Kemasiri. Would he even want to talk to her after that? What man would?
But perhaps if she could tell him the truth…? He was a kind man. If she told him everything – what she did, how the lie took hold until it was too late to go back on it, how she had been Soma for so long that she no longer thought of herself as Jaya, how she loved him, truly, with every drop of her blood… If she told him all of it, maybe he would understand. He cared about her. It had to be worth trying. She thought of his smiling face. Yes. She would try. Maybe he would understand. Maybe he would help.
Sahan had his last exam that day. He said he was going out with his friends afterwards. He wasn’t that far away, but she didn’t know where to find him. If only she could contact him. But how?
She knew his phone number; she had memorized it, merely for the pleasure of knowing it by heart. The nearest phone was on the landing on the second floor. Did she dare tiptoe down to it and make a call? Would that make Madam angrier than she already was? Soma went to stand by the door and listened. She opened the door a crack. She could hear Madam in the kitchen downstairs. She opened the door further and crept out, her feet making very little sound on the carpet. The voices downstairs didn’t pause. Feeling bolder, she crept down the stairs and across the landing, pausing frequently. She picked up the handset, thankful that it didn’t beep on the other units. Pressing the keys would make a noise. She stood there, paralysed with indecision. How could she make the call without Madam knowing? There was a crash downstairs, followed by Louie shouting. She noted with relief that he sounded annoyed, rather than hurt. She had a few minutes before he stopped.
She quickly tapped out Sahan’s number. It rang a few times and went to voicemail. ‘It’s Soma,’ she whispered. ‘Something’s happened. I don’t have my phone. Come and find me. It’s—’
Madam said, ‘I’ll get him a clean top.’ Footsteps as someone came up the stairs. Soma rammed the phone back in its holder and fled back to her room.
‘No more exams! Or lectures!’ Sahan took a swig of his beer. He was in the corner of a booth in a pub, wedged in between Nate on one side and another male friend on the other. They had been there some hours now and no one was entirely sober.
Nate turned his attention to him. ‘So, Sahan, me old mucker. What are you going to do now?’
‘Well, depending on whether I get the results—’
‘Oh shut up. You’ll get a first. Everyone knows that,’ said Nate.
‘Take it as read.’
For once Sahan didn’t argue. It was too good an evening to be negative. He had his whole future gleaming ahead of him. ‘In that case, I’m going to start work at the end of the summer.’
‘And the girlfriend situation?’ Cara nudged Nate back out of the way, so that she could see Sahan. ‘What are you going to do about that?’
Sahan grinned. It seemed strange to hear Soma referred to as his ‘girlfriend’. He had only been out with her on one date, really, but he had seen her several times a week for so long. He knew her so well. ‘Girlfriend’ didn’t begin to cover how he felt about her.
‘Yeah, Sahan,’ said Nate, slurring a little. ‘What are you going to do? You’re going to be in Teesside, she’s going to be here…’ He spread his hands apart to illustrate his point.
He hadn’t told anyone what he intended to do. He had mentioned to Soma that she should come with him, but he hadn’t actually come out and asked her. Perhaps now, in the presence of his friends, was a good time to voice the thoughts that were buzzing inside his head. ‘I think…’ he said, ‘I’m going to ask her to marry me.’
This raised cheers and applause around the table. A dozen questions were fired at him. Cara’s was clearest. ‘Are you going to run away together?’
That was a distinct possibility. How and when would need to be worked out. He was fairly sure he could talk Yamuna and Bim round. He needed to sound them out.
‘That is one option,’ he said.
Cara gave a loud whoop. ‘I knew it! I knew it!’ She punched Nate in the arm. ‘See, I told you, true love will always win!’
Nate gave a theatrical sigh and shook his head at Sahan. ‘She’s going to be insufferable now.’
Sahan laughed. Nate raised his glass in a toast. Sahan joined in as they all drank to his future. He had never been so happy.
‘Have you called her yet?’ said Cara. ‘Have you told her how your exam went?’
‘No.’ He was intending to call her later in the evening, when she finished work.
‘Well call her, man, call her. Come on.’ Nate made urging motions with his hands. ‘Ask her to marry you.’
‘What, with you lot all shouting? I don’t think so.’ But he pulled his phone out of his pocket anyway. It was eight o’clock. ‘Bloody hell, is that the time?’
‘Call her. Call her.’ Nate started banging on the table. The others took up the chant. Sahan stood up, laughing. People let him out.
It was still light outside in the encroaching summer and the evening was warm. Sahan felt a moment of pure contentment. His exams were over, he had a job to go to and he was in love. He walked a little way into the car park and was surprised to realise he wasn’t as steady on his feet as he’d thought. He grinned happily. When he got several bars of phone signal he dialled Soma’s number.
After a few rings, someone answered the phone. Surprised, Sahan said, ‘Hello, it’s me.’
There was no answer. He could sense someone at the other end of the line. ‘Soma?’ Still nothing. ‘Soma? Is everything okay?’ The line went dead.
Sahan stared at his phone, where the call had clearly been terminated. What was that all about? Had Yamuna got hold of Soma’s phone? Shit.
He noticed for the first time that he had a message. He must have not heard it ring with all the noise in the pub. Almost without thinking, he played it. It was Soma, breathlessly telling him that something had happened and she’d lost her phone. Suddenly he was completely sober. He played the message twice and felt alarm rising in his chest. What had happened to her? Had she been mugged? He checked the message again and saw that it had come from Yamuna’s home phone, which meant that Soma had made it home safely. That was something, at least.
He called Yamuna’s house.
‘It’s me. Sahan. I’m… calling to tell you I’ve finished my exams.’
‘Was that today? I’m sorry Sahan, with all the drama I completely forgot. How did it go?’
‘What drama?’
Yamuna made a disgusted noise. ‘It’s been a mad day,’ she said. ‘Bim came home to get something he’d forgotten and he found the servant girl kissing some man.’
The last trace of warm fuzziness vanished. ‘What?’
‘I don’t know, Sahan. It’s all such a nightmare.’
‘What do you mean? What’s going on? What man?’
‘I knew she was carrying on with some man. I told you, didn’t I? I was right. Bim came home and— ugh. I don’t even want to think about it. I trusted her with my son.’
The man Soma had been seeing was him. Was there someone else as well? He felt his world twisting around him. ‘What man?’
‘Oh, not someone you know. He’s the driver of one of Bim’s friends. Sri Lankan guy.’
‘Kemasiri.’ That would explain it. He thought of Kemasiri’s outburst a few weeks ago. And Kemasiri knew about him and Soma. Had he attacked her because he was annoyed with Sahan? Or was he angry with him because they were both seeing the same girl? No. He didn’t believe that. His Soma would never do anything so duplicitous.
‘What? Who?’ Yamuna’s bewildered voice dragged him back to the present.
‘Kemasiri. The driver. I know him.’
‘Oh. Right. Well, he claims she’s been seeing him for a while. She doesn’t deny it. Louie has been a nightmare child all afternoon and—’
‘Wait. Where’s Soma? Why have you got Louie? I’m confused now.’ He needed to know what was true and what was not. He didn’t put it past Kemasiri to lie. He thought of the man looming over Deepthi … he could even imagine him assaulting someone. But Yamuna seemed to think that Soma was in on it. Why wasn’t Soma saying anything? He needed to know. Even if it destroyed him, he had to know. ‘Look, Yamuna, I’ll come over and give you a hand with Louie, so that you can sort this thing out.’
‘Oh, would you? That would be brilliant. Bim is being so odd about the whole thing; it would be really useful to be able to talk to him without Louie being there.’
He started walking. ‘I’m on my way.’ He hung up.
Furious, he called Soma’s phone again. Again, someone answered.
‘Kemasiri,’ he shouted. ‘What have you done to her, you bastard? If you have a problem with me, you take it up with me. You do not have the right to go and attack an innocent girl.’
Kemasiri chuckled down the phone. ‘Innocent? That little whore? You poor, wretched idiot. She took you in so well, didn’t she? Didn’t you know? Her name isn’t even Somavathi. Everything she told you is a lie.’
‘Wh—’ but Kemasiri had gone. Sahan rang back, but the phone had been turned off. He paused at the bus stop. How long would the bus be? It was quicker to run.