BUYING THAT INITIAL PLANE TICKET OUT OF THE COUNTRY can be hard on the wallet. Ticket prices vary widely from one continent to the next and within regions. A ticket to Paris is sometimes comparable in cost to a semester’s tuition, but a flight from Paris to London can run you the price of a pack of Wrigley’s (as in less than one euro; shocking but true). Here’s the rundown on getting from point A to point B, with a bunch of sea in between.
START YOUR TRIP FROM THE cheapest location in the United States possible. If you live in Bumble-fuck, you’re likely to save big by arranging transportation to a major international hub. This could mean volunteering to drive an old lady’s car to Florida, taking a Greyhound to New York, or hopping a train to Houston, Chicago, or Dallas. Amtrak, Greyhound, Megabus, and car exchanges are surprisingly cheap ways to get around the States.
When booking from the big city, expand your horizons. While sites like Priceline and Travelocity have the best commercials, check out other sites like Momondo.com, which compares several airlines and dates at once so that you can get a general idea of ticket prices. Keeping your dates flexible sets you up for finding the best rates possible. Smaller airlines often have crazy-good deals on their official sites, as well—Spirit Air, for example, sometimes offers flights for under $100 from Miami to Bogota, Colombia. STA Travel is an old-school travel agency that has sixteen locations around the country, all close to college campuses. With a student ID, you can score a ticket at a price that will make businessmen jealous.
If you’re heading out to do some good in the world, there are organizations that subsidize transportation. If you’re set up to volunteer, check out FlyForGood.com and score a discount on airfare to the volunteer destination. Flip through our Make Yourself Useful section (page 174) to get some ideas on how to go the good route.
Getting off-grid is great, but keeping that smartphone active could be helpful. There are a ton of apps that make travel smoother. FlightStats specializes in tracking flights, and Gate-Guru provides useful maps of sprawling international hubs. Delta has an app to track your luggage, which is helpful when everything you own is at the mercy of multiple airports.
FLIGHTS DON’T JUST COME and go. There are several different types of airline tickets—some with more tricks up their sleeve than Amelia Earhart.
If you only have a short time, or if you’re Captain Organized and have your route planned out, opt for a tried-and-true round-trip ticket. Choose a spot to bookend your travels, and plan to use local or regional transportation between destinations. A round-trip ticket can be reassuring, especially for travel virgins, because beginning and end dates are tangible. It can also be cheaper in the long run: a single-leg ticket to London, for example, is sometimes only slightly less than a roundtrip one. Just keep in mind that once you do this, you’re locked in.
If you’ve got more time on your hands or don’t know exactly where you want to go, join the ranks of bank robbers and fugitives and book a seat one-way. With a one-way ticket, you’re as flexible as a yoga teacher. Say you’re chilling with a group in Tangiers that’s headed to Dubai tomorrow, and you decide you want to tag along. No set plans for a return trip home? Score. Those palmshaped islands are yours. Just be sure to set aside enough in your bank account to get home eventually—unless you’re planning on pulling a Bonnie and Clyde.
These are multidestination tickets that make your trip a three-way. You’ll still pick a place to bookend your travels, but you can also hit up a couple of spots in between. An open-jaw ticket typically goes from Point A to B to C and back to A. You’d be interested in one of these if you’re trying to cover mad ground, or if long-distance trains and buses aren’t your thing. They’re also good if you’re planning to travel for six months or more, because it gives your wandering a backbone and keeps aimless vagabonding tendencies in check.
Airpasses are promotional packages offered by allied airlines around the world. Each pass has a predetermined list of cities you can choose from, and the ticket price includes a stop in each city you choose. Residents of any city included are ineligible for an Airpass. You’re sacrificing flexibility, but if you score a good deal, you can always tack on more time before or after your set itinerary.
An RTW ticket is like buying wholesale—each ticket included costs a little bit less than it would alone. Beginning at roughly $3,000, an RTW can be a lot to put out, but other than trying to paddle a raft around the globe for forty years, this is the cheapest way to see the world. Do your research: some include party fouls such as only being able to fly in one direction or having to book round-trips. Check out OneWorld.com, SkyTeam.com, and StarAlliance.com to get started.
JUST GETTING LAID WON’T get you many high fives anymore. To join the truly elite lovers club, board a plane and engage in some freaky activity 40,000 feet above the ground. Here’s how:
GET A PARTNER
Unless you’re with someone you hump regularly, you’ll need to scout out a partner. Don’t be a boarding gate creeper, but hit up the nearest airport pub instead. Scan the bar for a boarding pass with the same flight, “randomly” grab a seat next to your target and get to work.
TIMING
Timing is key. On overnight flights, wait until everyone is asleep or watching Nicolas Cage ruin a movie. On shorter flights, wait for the drink service to start. The flight attendants are your mile-high cock blocks, so make sure they are distracted.
MAKE YOUR MOVE
Do your prep work at the seat and go one at a time to a predetermined bathroom. On the bigger overnight planes, the mid-cabin bathrooms are bigger, and flight attendants linger in the back all night. On daytime flights, the back bathrooms are your love lavs—out of sight from the rest of the cabin.
THE ACT
You’re not here to set any marathon records, so no need to think of sports to prolong this one. Get in, and get out. Bring a rubber—you won’t find condom dispensers in these bathrooms. When you’re done, walk to your seats separately and avoid eye contact. Either way, the deed is done, and no amount of shame can take away your membership card.
Congratulations to the newest inductees of the mile-high club. It’s about time you stopped flying Virgin.
WHILE OUR HIGHWAYS KICK ass and the road trip is as American as apple pie, we’re behind the times when it comes to getting around on the ground. Most parts of the world have elaborate train and bus systems that make Amtrak look like your toy set around the Christmas tree, and Greyhound look like a Chihuahua. There’s no better way to understand the true essence of a country than by utilizing its mass-transit systems, and in most backpacker hot spots, mass transit is the fastest and most reliable way to get around.
European train trips are legendary—chances are if you’ve been to Europe, you’ve boarded one of these bad boys. Travel between European countries is more like crossing a state line, and the über-developed train system is your ticket to just about anywhere. If you’re backpacking across Europe for a while, your best bet is to buy a Eurail Pass.
Broken down by distance of travel, there are several different types of passes. The Global Pass includes all rail travel to and within twenty-three countries. A Select Pass gives you access to between three and five countries, and a Regional Pass enables you to travel within and between two different countries. If you’re planning on spending your whole sojourn getting spiritual with Greek goddesses or exercising your Italian stallion for a while, opt for a One Country Pass, where travel is unlimited within the country of choice. Tickets are cheaper the younger you are—snag a youth ticket for a 35 percent discount. If both you and your travel partner are twenty-six or older, the Small Group Saver will knock off 15 percent. There are a handful of Eurail apps that will bring train schedules to your fingertips, which can make all the difference in the world.
Getting around China or India by car or bus ain’t no European holiday. Heavy road traffic is caused by animals with the same right-of-way as rickshaws and enough people to clog the world’s arteries. Metal bus seats and bumpy roads can leave your ass baboon blue after a long trip. The best way to get around these giant countries is to train it. There are several different class levels, and they vary from country to country.
Train compartments hold up to six people, and overnight trains usually have a Sleeper Class. Opt for a top bunk if you’re into personal space, because lower berths serve as benches during the daytime. A cramped General Class ticket is hardly worth the money you’ll save. Most trains also have a more expensive AC Sleeper Class, in which you’ll find more privacy and less sweat.
Busabout, which operates throughout nine countries in Europe (with routes in Northern Africa), is comparable to Eurorail in the way that it works. You’ll be issued a pass based on your preferred destinations and length of travel. Busabout tickets, however, are specifically designed for backpackers, so bust out that booze and make some friends. There are adventure, trekking, festival-geared, and hop-on, hop-off options. Check out Busabout.com to create your own trip.
Nowhere in the world is there a more developed bus system than the international routes crisscrossing South America. The quality of these buses depends on the wealth of your country of origin. Long-distance Argentine buses, for example, are usually double-decker, air-conditioned beauties with fully reclining seats and even free hot coffee. Buses in Bolivia or Ecuador are a lot rougher, but they’ve got character—and build it, too.
International pricing varies from country to country, but it’s almost always cheaper than flying. You’ll need to budget for Colombian buses, but the bus route running the gringo trail from La Paz to Cusco will hardly dent your wallet. Be sure to hit up the terminal ticket booth a day before you want to travel, and don’t forget to ask if the bus has a bathroom on board.
Rental cars are usually the most expensive mode of transport, but there’s nothing quite like getting behind the wheel, rolling down the windows, blasting some good tunes, and conquering foreign roads. You’ll find an agency in any major airport—Avis, Budget, Europcar, Hertz, and Thrifty are all international companies. Some have apps to save you long-ass lines at the airport and frustrating miscommunication. Not every country requires an International Driving Permit, but some do. You can get one at your local DMV before leaving. Keep in mind that road signs will be in the language of the country and you’ll have to figure out which side of the road to drive on. Be prepared to be confused while in motion.
SKATEBOARDING, NOW THE world’s grittiest sponsorship sport, started in the 1940s when the waves weren’t gnarly enough for California surfers. Street surfing hit the scene rolling, and in 1964 the first international skateboarding championship was held in Anaheim. Once liability suits threatened to keep skaters off the streets, skate parks popped up from Florida to Tokyo. Kickflip the shit out of these awesome international skate parks:
•At Amazing Square Skatepark, smack in the middle of Tokyo, you can skate the core of a major metropolis without a police baton up your ass. In addition to some hardcore street courses, Amazing Square has plenty of verticals and a giant half-pipe.
•You a bowl lover? At Bondi Beach Skatepark, just outside of Sydney, a killer view is a bonus to catching some air in the epic bowls. All the bikinis aren’t a bad deal, either.
•There’s a ton of class-act skateparks in France, but Marseille Skatepark is top dog. Grind up in this trippily graffitied course for free, and take a dip in the Mediterranean at the beach next door to wash off the skate sweat.
•The SMP Skatepark in Shanghai, China, is a cultural revolution, with 45,000 square feet of rails, stairs, bowls, ramps, and a viewing plaza to watch the action.
•If you’re hard enough to flip it old-school, hit up the Livingston Skatepark in Livingston, Scotland. This skull-lined bowl is legendary.
•Leave it to the guys who started it all to come up with the mother of all skateparks—California’s Lake Cunningham Regional Skatepark in San Jose boasts a 70-by-22-foot full pipe, massive bowls, pools, a mega wall, and a street course. Bring some Band-Aids.