The Jenkins family practices a slightly different way of opening gifts. They begin five minutes before midnight—technically, five minutes before Christmas morning. Justin explains that once they reached age ten, he and his brother started going to bed late and sleeping in even later. That’s how they came up with their new tradition.
I can tell both twins are excited. Justin said they haven’t decorated or really celebrated Christmas since they were thirteen when their mom died. The prior three years, Regan tossed them money and gift cards—end of the celebration. It feels nice that by bringing our two families together, it enables them to enjoy the holiday again.
Because of Regan’s generosity, I am able to buy everyone gifts. He’s been faithfully putting money in my account. Regan truly is a decent man. Justin aside, I’m okay with Mama dating him.
My clock almost strikes midnight. I better head downstairs. On the way out of my bedroom door, I gaze into dreamy hazel eyes. We almost run into each other—me going out, him about to knock.
My face lights up. “Hi!”
“Hey, sweet-cheeks.” He grins—no left dimple.
Darn it! Jackson stands in the threshold. His norm is more of a goth-like appearance, preferring black. Now, he is wearing navy warm-up pants and a Nike T-shirt—more of Justin’s style. Justin’s hair is normally longer on top. Jackson must have not gotten a recent cut. His hair is the same length as Justin’s. At first glance, Jackson looks identical. What tells them apart is Justin’s dimple and their demeanor. Both speak in the same tone of voice—they just have different mannerisms. They walk diversely, too. My disappointment must be evident.
“Sorry, I’m not Justin.” Jackson’s forehead wrinkles. “I came to tell you we’re downstairs. Justin’s doing something real quick for your mom, so I told him I’d fetch you.”
“On my way down as we speak.”
His eyes roam over me. His expression is hard to read, amusement with a flash of desire. I recall what Justin had told me a while back. Jackson kinda has a thing for you, too. Besides when Jackson had watched The 100 with me and placed his hand on my thigh, he’d made no move. Jackson is going out with Suri, so I’d forgotten he even had the slightest interest in me. The way his eyes are raking over me now, it feels like a look Justin would give. Maybe I’m reading too much into it.
Reaching his hand out, Jackson grazes his thumb across my cheek, caressing it—a gentle gesture that also feels affectionate. Shocked, I take a step backward. He places his hand by his side, bouncing on his heels.
Okay? I’m not about to touch that with a ten-foot pole.
“We better get downstairs,” I say, bolting pass him.
The rest of the gang is gathered around the tree when we arrive. Justin’s lips curl upward when he sees me. I smile at him in return. He is the elf in charge, wearing a red hat with elf-ears to hand out gifts.
“You look adorable,” I tell Justin, giggling.
The dorky expression he gives me only makes me laugh more. No one wastes time with the gift exchange. Justin hands them out quickly. Regan snaps pictures with his phone. I haven’t a clue what Jackson likes, and Tanya’s picky, so I’d gotten them both Visa gift cards.
“Thanks, sweet-cheeks,” Jackson says.
“No problem.”
Jackson knows of my book-geekery. I receive a Barnes and Noble gift card from him, which I thank him for. Tanya’s present to me is very nice—a Michael Kors jacket in my favorite color, purple. I love the furry, white trim on the hood.
“Thank you, Tanya. Love it!”
“Thanks for the gift card.” Tanya nods at me.
She is closer to Jackson, like I am with Justin. Well, in my case—in more ways than one. So, they know each other’s likes. Tanya bought Jackson a new pair of Nike shoes. He is more than psyched when he opens them. Tanya receives a Michael Kors purse from Jackson.
Oh, wow!
The purse is a smaller style, but that size still must run over a hundred bucks.
“Ross has great deals on purses.” Jackson winks at Tanya.
A huge grin spreads across her face. “You’re the best, Jay.”
Justin wants us to go at the same time. Loving basketball and being a die-hard Rockets fan, I went with that theme.
“Sweet!” Justin exclaims, ripping open his first gift—a Rockets hat. “Thanks, Madi. Your turn.”
My eyes grow large when I see a beautiful diamond heart pendant necklace. “Justin … I don’t know what to say, it’s gorgeous. Thank you.” He beams at me. Tanya and Jackson know about us, but they still seemed surprised. Jackson’s eyes are wide, and Tanya’s mouth is hanging open.
“That’s a pretty necklace,” Tanya says. “It’s very romantic.”
My head whips over to hers, pleading. She only smirks at me.
“Son, that must have cost a pretty penny,” Regan inquires, raising his eyebrow.
Mama gawks. “Those diamonds are blinging—very good clarity.”
Charlotte would know—diamonds are one of her best friends. My eyes dart over to Justin, full of unease. I can see how this looks. Justin got Tanya a Marshall’s gift card and me a diamond necklace. A heart pendant at that.
“Madison hardly owns any jewelry and not one diamond.” Justin clears his throat. “I thought I’d start her collection. You know how we do it big, Dad.”
Regan grins. “That’s very kind of you, son.”
Justin’s answer must be acceptable. He has mentioned his dad appreciated the finer things in life.
We both unwrap our second gift. Mine is another Barnes and Noble gift card—Justin’s is a Rockets jersey. My shoulders relax. This is a more appropriate present—well appreciated. Secretly, I love my diamond heart pendant. It’s the most beautiful gift I’ve ever received. I am going to let Justin know how much I like it later. Diamonds and stunning jewelry are normally gifts of the heart. For now, it seems the crisis is averted. Justin was quick on his feet or he already had planned what he would say if questions came up.
Our family exchange goes on and on. Justin hit the nail on the head when he’d stated that the Jenkins did it big. Mama and Regan shower me and the twins with a new wardrobe of clothes—all name brand—and more gift cards. My presents include everything from tops to jeans, even a pair of Ugg boots. At first, I think that Mama picked out my clothes. But after watching her open her gifts, I’m not so sure. Regan has great taste also.
Mama’s new wardrobe far exceeds ours. She’s gotten so many gorgeous designer things, I stopped counting after she ripped open the third pair of pumps. She got Regan nice ties and, the grand finale, a stunning Rolex.
“Dad, you must have been a good boy for Christmas. Those watches cost at least five grand,” Jackson whistles.
Mama lifts her shoulders and Regan’s smile widens. We kids laugh. Regan loves his watch so much, he kisses Mama on the spot. It’s more than awkward, watching them go at it like teens. Neither one of them are holding back, either.
Finally, Justin clears his throat, and Jackson exclaims, “Um, Dad … are you trying to get her pregnant?!”
They break apart, full of giggles. I notice Tanya sitting quietly. I believe she is pouting because her only gift from them was a pair of black, knee-high Michael Kors boots.
“Okay, everyone, there is one final gift,” Mama announces. “It’s for my baby girl, Tanya. Your birthday-Christmas gift wrapped in one?” Tanya’s eyes light up.
Regan stands. “Come on, guys. We saved the best for last.”
Tanya jumps up, ecstatic. The rest of us follow them outside. Parked in the driveway is a stunning new car.
“Is this for me?” Tanya screeches.
“Yep! Merry Christmas, baby girl,” Mama exclaims.
“Nice.” Jackson bobs his head in approval.
Justin looks impressed, too. Tanya screams, running to hug them. Living in a cul-de-sac of this huge subdivision, we don’t have many neighbors. The houses are spaced far apart. Only eight homes total comprise our street. I’m not even sure if the family across the street that lost their roof have returned from Harvey yet. The tornado destroyed their home, but by the grace of God, barely touched ours.
If any neighbors do happen to see us, they’ll wonder what all the fuss is about this late. It’s almost 1 am. The outside of our house is lit with mega-powered lighting, so we can see the gold-color car well. It glistens in the light.
“This is a Lexus IS,” Regan states proudly, handing Tanya a set of keys.
“It’s late, but we wanted you to see it,” Mama chimes in. “You can take it for a spin in the morning.”
Tanya jumps inside, checking it out. Jackson plops into the passenger seat. Justin and I walk over to get a closer look. The interior is made of beige leather upholstery with dark woodgrain. Very impressive.
“This woodgrain is nice,” Justin says.
“It’s a pretty car,” I add.
“I love it!” Tanya grins from ear-to-ear. “You guys are the best parents ever.”
“It’s the perfect time for you to get a car,” Mama bellows.
“Track and basketball practice will be starting soon, so Tanya will be able to drive you two now,” Regan explains.
It’s a thoughtful gesture that Regan wants us to ride in style. I kind of feel guilty about my father not being here to celebrate with us, when this is the best Christmas we’ve ever had. This holiday isn’t supposed to be about gifts. It’s just the fact that our two families blend well. The rift of a torn-apart family feels like it is becoming whole. In the end, my father would want us to be happy, and this season is full of holiday cheer.
Christmas day flashes by quickly. Tanya takes everyone for a spin in her new Lexus. Later in the evening, we stuff our faces, and that night Justin and I stay up late watching flicks.
Day after Christmas, Regan takes Mama on a vacation to the newest casino in Louisiana, the Nugget. I look it up online. The casino resort is all that and a bag of chips. They will be gone until New Year’s Eve.
* * *
My eyelids grow heavy reading my novel, and it isn’t quite ten o’clock yet. Justin still isn’t back from his homeboy’s. Maybe I’ll finish this chapter before I pass out. Five minutes later, I give up on staying awake. I’m worse than an old maid. Turning off my light switch, I snuggle under the covers.
My eyes flutter through the darkness as I hear him say, “Hey, sleepyhead.”
Justin is leaning over me. Sitting up slightly, I focus on his silhouette in the dark. He hasn’t turned on a light. “Hi. I tried to stay awake but lost the battle.” He blows out his breath. “You okay?”
“Yeah, I just missed you. Scoot over.”
His movement shows him taking off his pants. I slide over and he climbs in behind me, wrapping his arm around my waist. Justin is wearing a shirt and boxers. He’s so close, I can feel his hardness against my backside. I’m pretty sure we aren’t just going to lie down and sleep. His proximity causes me to shiver. Justin’s warm breath tickles my neck. His heavy breathing is mirroring how fast my heart is pounding, and he hasn’t even made a move.
I can smell alcohol on his breath. Titling my head, I ask, “You must’ve had a good time. I smell your fun.”
He chuckles, kissing the base of my neck. It shoots a tingle down my spine. Tonight, Justin’s scent smells of pine, not his usual cinnamon spice. Maybe he’s wearing another cologne. The smell is nice—just different. I don’t ponder long. Justin tilts my head again, parting my mouth with his. His kiss is demanding. As his tongue tangles with mine, I can taste the liquor mixed with mint. Soon, I’m swept in desire as his mouth claims mine.
Justin shifts, maneuvering me onto my back. He moves his body against my silk night pants, and I moan. His hand inches up my thigh and he grips my bottom, raising my legs. Lowering his head, he catches my lips in another smoldering kiss.
“I love the way you feel,” he groans. “The way you kiss.”
Justin’s demeanor is probably the alcohol talking. With greedy hands, he begins to fondle me everywhere. Mine follow suit, touching him. I gasp as he reaches lower. My back arches as he slips his hand into my sleep pants. This is a step further. I cry out at the pinching, yet erotic, feel.
These sensations are maddening with intensity, making it easy to lose control. Our intimacy is so heated, I don’t know how much longer I can last before I give in to sin. Justin’s kiss is intoxicating. He knows just how to work his mouth. His lips are the same, but the way he’s moving them is different.
I’m in over my head. Justin has experience. Spun in his web, soon, there will be no turning back. I’ve fallen head over heels for Justin, so I’ve thought about giving myself to him. But his drunken state makes me question going any further. I definitely don’t want him not to remember our first time because he’s intoxicated.
“Justin ... wait.” He isn’t listening, capturing my mouth again. I surrender for a moment, then push my palms against his chest to get some distance.
“Please,” he pleads. “This Ecstasy has me riled up. You have no idea how badly I’ve wanted you since the first time I saw you.” He leans forward, nipping on my bottom lip.
Ecstasy! “Why did you do X?”
“I only wanted to try it. Don’t be mad at me.”
“I’m surprised, not upset.” His hand continues his exploration below my navel, and then he curves his fingers in an upward motion. I don’t know what he’s doing to me, but the vibes magnify.
“Don’t make me beg, Madi. I need you.”
“What about protection?” I pant.
“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it.”
It’s hard to deny him when he’s pleading with me, and Justin is not playing fair. Whatever he’s doing with his skillful hand is distracting me. I crest from the overload of sensations surging through me and he takes advantage of this. I don’t deter him any longer. I give in to what my heart wants, ignoring the qualms of my brain.
Justin lies beside me, winded. My emotions are in a typhoon of chaos. Curled into a fetal position on my side, I fight back tears. What started as a euphoric experience had ended horribly—nothing like I imagined it would be. I thought Justin would be gentle—he wasn’t. The pain was worse than what people described. When I’d told him it hurt, he promised it would get better. I thought his kisses would make the pain abate—it didn’t. When I asked him to stop, he wouldn’t. He only pushed into me harder, pinning my arms above my head. His crushing weight made me feel trapped and the pain only intensified. My first time was supposed to be special, but I feel conflicted.
Tanya must be home now. Music in her bedroom next door is turned up loudly. Justin stirs. Getting up, he turns on the lamp by my bedside. In my peripheral vision, I see him putting on his clothes.
I don’t make eye contact with him until he says, “That was even better than I imagined. You fit around me perfectly, sweet-cheeks.”
Sweet-cheeks? My entire body grows rigid. A smile spreads across his face and there isn’t a left cheek dimple, in sight.
No, it can’t be!