WHEN ANN MOVED IN the following week, Eva had no trouble welcoming her daughter-in-law’s offer to paint not just her room, but the living room and kitchen as well. Soon the apartment sparkled with soft beige and creamy white. For the first time since the crash Eva felt proud of her home.
Simon’s life improved too. Since the Depression he had had a series of jobs, none of which had lasted. Now, with the shortage of young men, Simon got a job selling shoes at Florsheim’s, where his skills with customers were quickly appreciated. He brought home a hundred and twenty-five dollars a month and felt rich.
Even Ann, whose work at the shipyard was often exhausting, was grateful that her job kept her mind off Phillip’s absence. When she got her first paycheck, she deducted ten dollars’ allowance and put the rest in the bank in Simon and Eva’s name. She left the passbook on Eva’s dresser with a note which said simply, “I love you.”
Eva and Simon were deeply touched, but at first they wanted to refuse. “Darling, we couldn’t think of such a thing,” Eva said. “It is lovely and generous of you, but ifs your entire salary.”
Ann glanced at Simon. He had insisted on using his own earnings to pay for rent and food. It gave him a new sense of dignity to be the head of his household again. But how long could he continue to work? His arthritis troubled him more and more, and his eyesight was gradually failing. When Phillip came home, he might have trouble finding a job, so it made sense for the Coulters to build a small nest egg. In the end Simon agreed and Eva went along despite her guilt. If she had known how grateful Ann was at being taken into Phillip’s family she might have felt better. As it was, Eva just kept writing her son telling him how lucky they all were to have Ann.
It was now March, and Ann hadn’t received a letter from Phillip in over a month. She knew he was being sent somewhere in the Pacific and she avidly devoured the newspapers, wondering where he’d been stationed.
At least today was Saturday and she could look forward to lunch with Ruthie. The Newmans had been lucky. Kenny had been attached to the Allied Supreme Headquarters and was currently as safe as one could be in England. Ann tried not to be envious as she described her fears at not hearing from Phillip.
“I know it’s trite,” Ruthie said, “but no news is good news.”
“Do you really believe that, Ruthie? I wish I did. The thing that bothers me is just that I haven’t heard anything. I can’t even look at the map and say, “He’s there.” And the newspapers don’t say a thing about any action in the Pacific. I guess I really shouldn’t torture myself. Phillip isn’t in a combat unit, and I suppose if anything terrible were going on, we’d have read about it. I mean, the government would have to tell us, wouldn’t they?”
“I’m sure they would. I wish I could say something to reassure you, Ann. I do believe Phillip is all right.” Ruthie spoke with more conviction than she actually felt.
“Enough about the war,” Ann said, forcing a smile. “You look wonderful, Ruthie. Five months’ pregnant and you barely show.”
“My doctor has a fit if I gain any weight. Besides, I want to be gorgeous when Kenny gets back!”
Would Phillip come back? Ann just knew that something was terribly wrong. Dear God, if only she had been pregnant, at least she would have had his child. It was hard to share her friend’s joy.
“The one who’s happy,” Ruthie was saying, “is my mother. She can’t wait.”
On the streetcar going home Ann stared blindly at the passing buildings. Oh, Phillip, she thought, what has been happening to you since you left me?
The truth, if she had known, would have made her still more wretched.