Baby blues dos and don’ts

You don’t have to accept that feeling sad or down is your only option. There are numerous ways to help yourself feel better. Getting enough rest is at the top of the list. Here are some dos and don’ts to help you get through.

DO

Seek support. As a new mother, you are in a physically and emotionally vulnerable state. You can’t, and shouldn’t, attempt to cope with everything yourself.

Be patient. Remember that bonding is a long process, not made or ruined by one thing you do or don’t do.

Set low goals. If the baby’s alive and the house is still standing, you’re doing a great job. If everyone is fed and sane by the end of the day (whenever that is), you deserve a trophy.

Talk about it. Finding a sympathetic listener can help you to put things in perspective. Getting help with the baby and getting some uninterrupted sleep may help you to perk up.

Seek professional care. If your misery doesn’t ease within two weeks and you find yourself feeling extremely depressed, unable to cope, or with fears of hurting yourself or your baby, seek the help of your health-care provider and a referral to a counselor, psychiatrist, or psychologist specializing in postpartum depression (PPD). It’s very common and treatable.

DON’T

Drown your sorrows with alcohol, as it is a depressant and will only make you feel worse later. Drinking alcohol may also affect your milk supply.

Stop breastfeeding. Breastfeeding releases feel-good hormones that may help ease your symptoms. Stopping it will be painful, and the resulting hormonal shifts will make you feel worse. (Weaning advice can be found on in 3. Your Baby Maintenance Guide.)

Judge yourself. Avoid comparing yourself to other mothers. If you’re feeling sensitive, don’t be influenced by what other mothers say they feel or do. Don’t try to put up a good front or act in the way that you think a “good mother” should. Everyone’s an individual. Feelings get better when they’re talked about, not denied.