Tip

Putting your baby in a front carrier or sitting him in a semiupright infant seat after feeding will use the pull of gravity to help your baby’s digestion and bring up air bubbles.

Coping with crying

Does your baby have colic?
About one out of five babies is excessively fussy. Episodes of unexplained crying that go on day after day (or night after night) are often labeled “colic.”

Crying sieges usually begin in the second or third week after birth. Crying jags usually start suddenly and happen about the same time each day, usually late afternoon and into the evening.

The “official” definition of colic is “when an otherwise healthy baby between the age of three weeks and three months cries for more than 30 minutes for three days a week.”

No one knows what causes colic, exactly. In fact, “colic” is used as a generic term for lots of crying. The crying could be caused by a baby’s reaction to an ingredient in his formula or being transmitted through breastmilk. It could be an inner-ear infection, an oncoming illness, or a hernia. It might be a case of parental mismanagement (though that’s not usually the case), or a symptom of physical immaturity.

Your baby’s crying can be very distressing, because your baby can’t tell you what’s wrong. Crying begs to be stopped and arouses an actual physical response in parents that’s similar to waiting in the dentist’s office for a root canal.

It’s hard to know what to do. When the crying just keeps on and on, it can be very stressful and erode your feelings of competence as a parent.

If there’s no physical reason for the crying, your baby’s internal systems may simply be out of synch. Thankfully, most cases of colic disappear by the third month, and colicky babies are much more likely to become delightful toddlers, while so-called “good” babies are more likely to turn into little hellions later.

There may be justice in the world, after all. (But not always.)

When crying is too trying
Here are some signals that your baby’s crying may mean that he’s having a physical problem and he needs to see a health-care provider:

• Constant and shrill. Your baby cries constantly for more than three hours, or the cries are unusually shrill or intense.

• Inconsolable. Your crying baby cannot be comforted and has a tense, hard belly, and this has never happened before or been checked by a doctor.

• Something seems wrong. Your baby seems to be in pain or acts sick, has a rectal temperature over 100.5º F, and has vomiting or diarrhea.

• You can’t cope. You are afraid you might hurt your baby, or you feel you cannot care for your baby.

Keep a record
If you’ve got a fussy baby on your hands, don’t spend too much time (and energy) worrying that you’ll never be able to bond with him or that something’s terribly wrong with him.

Instead, use your concern constructively. Record the times your baby cries for a couple of days to see if there is a pattern to it. Is it mostly in the early evening? Or is it every few hours both day and night?

Video one of your baby’s episodes, then call your doctor and take it to your baby’s appointment. The playback will come in handy if your baby happens to be sleeping during your visit. The doctor will want to rule out any physical problems that could be causing your baby pain. (For practical hints on how to soothe a crying baby, see in 3. Your Baby Maintenance Guide.)