I'm up early, making sandwiches. Last week, Karl and I made plans for this morning, but everything might be out the window if the girlfriend is still around. The door to Karl's room is closed, and my curiosity is like an itch. I want to get a look at her in daylight.
There are sounds of movement just as I'm finishing up, stirring and footsteps. Karl's door opens, heard rather than seen, around two corners from the kitchen. I wait, but nobody emerges far enough for me to see. The bathroom door clicks shut, shower spray commences. No talking, just the usual commotion Karl makes getting ready each morning. One thing I grudgingly admire about Karl is his minimalist routine. Boot camp hair, beard trimmed weekly with electric clippers. He requires nothing but soap, deodorant, toothbrush and towel.
I move toward my bedroom, hoping to steal a glance down the hall. Karl's door remains open, but the room is empty. Unless she's in the shower with him, she must have already departed. I never heard her go. Though I don't remember getting any sleep, I must have drifted off. Maybe when I found her there, sitting on the edge of Karl's bed, she was getting ready to leave. That doesn't explain where Karl was.
The shower shuts off. I return to the kitchen, not wanting to be obvious. I listen for voices, the kind of interaction I'd expect between two crowded into our tiny bathroom, but all I hear is Karl stomping around. The sink runs briefly, then the door opens. Karl rounds into the kitchen, wearing gray boxer briefs and a white t-shirt, carrying his blue uniform shirt. "You almost ready, Tiger? Can't be late. We've both been ass-chewed one too many times."
I set the knife and cutting board in the sink, trying to guess whether he's kidding.
"Move it, get going," Karl says. "Two minutes." Not joking, apparently.
"Karl, you said we're going fishing."
"No, that's Saturday." His face shows such theatrical confusion, I wonder if it's a put-on. "Oh, fuck me running, today's Saturday. Well, that's cool. Fishing beats working."
"You're probably a little foggy. I'm guessing you didn't get much sleep either."
"Check this out." Karl lifts his t-shirt to reveal his right flank, a series of red inflamed scratches above the hip.
"I heard your yelling last night," I admit. "I mean, hers."
"Last night?" He looks at me crooked, seemingly mystified. "Just me here, by my lonesome. Turned in early." Karl twists, trying to examine around the side of his torso. "Jehoshaphat, Tiger, check out these marks. I'm all tore up."
"Sure." I laugh. "You were alone. You clawed yourself to pieces."
He looks like he really doesn't get it, but I'm not sure whether to take him seriously. Karl's constantly trying to get a rise out of me, always dropping some embarrassing goof, waiting to see if I'll fall for it. "Fuck, it's all raw." He traces a finger down the reddest wound. "Jesus."
I venture a high-throated, feminine whine, breath in and out fast. "Ohhh, owww, ohhh."
Karl doesn't seem to get it. Just looks at me like I'm nuts.
"You're saying you were alone here?" I confirm. "Last night?"
He nods, pulls down his t-shirt and throws the uniform shirt over the back of the couch, which forms a boundary wall between kitchen and living room.
"Karl, seriously, she was here. I got up to go to the bathroom, and your door was open. I couldn't help seeing her sitting there on the edge of your bed."
"Saw who?"
"I don't know her name. You never introduced us."
He shakes his head.
"A woman," I continue. "Your girlfriend. Who else would it be?"
Karl breaks up laughing, shaking his head. "So where was I during all this?"
"How should I know? I asked her, ‘Where's Karl?’ She just said, ‘He'll be back.’"
"I never left, Tiger. My girl, she wasn't around last night."
"What's her name? Tell me what she looks like."
"She's out of town. And I definitely never left."
"So how'd you get all scraped up? You get a little too passionate with the self-love?" I made the sound again, a tense wail so high and piercing it pained my throat to make it. "Whining and crying, howling all alone like that?"
"Stop that shit, Tiger. Hurts my ears. She's out of town, visiting family. These sex fantasies of yours, Jehoshaphat, Tiger. Sexual frustration will drive a man fucking unbalanced. See, here's the reason you need to go fishing. You know why so many old guys love to fish? Distraction from that traffic jam taking place in your nut sack."
I'll grant Karl one thing, he knows how to shut me up.
"Her name’s Sadie." Karl rubs his side. "I'll see her tonight. Wonder what she's going to say about these scratches?"
"When she comes over, I want to ask her if she was here. See what she says, without any coaching from you."
"Sure, bro. I'm telling you, Tiger, hormone seepage is getting into your bloodstream. Your brain's poisoned by the DSB."
"Sure, bro." I want to change the subject. "I made sandwiches, plus Coke for you, iced coffee for me. It’s all in the ice chest. You say I need fishing. Let’s go."
"Said it's a substitute, didn't say it's a good substitute." He looks at me, mock serious, puts one hand on his hip, juts it sideways like a supermodel. "Tiger. Seriously, it's time."
"I get it, I know. Really. I'm over Michelle."
"No."
"It's a process. I'm getting out into the world."
"Bullshit. You're hanging around here all by yourself, like a pussy."
"I promise you. I'm not holding out for Michelle. Seriously."
"Michelle, that's her name?" He glares, pops his knuckles, like he's inspired to do violence.
"You know her name." I pick up the ice chest. "Let's go."
"It's time, that's all I'm saying. Maybe Sadie's got a friend. You interested?"
This catches my attention. I stand frozen, imagining some unknown woman, her face. It's just an idea.
"You are interested, I can tell. You horn dog. Okay, I'll do some digging, but if Sadie does have a friend, you can't be a pussy. You got to assert yourself a little. At least pretend you own a pair."
Maybe. The possibility gets me thinking. "I had weird dreams. Maybe that's what it was."
"I bet you have weird dreams." He makes a face, and goes back for weekend clothes.
A few minutes later, we're driving.