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After lunch, I went to English I was extremely upset because Natalie was in the hallway and asked me about suspension and said it was awesome that I was known as a little liar and a pathetic jerk. Too bad she isn’t known for those.
The English teacher did not care for me so yelled at me for wanting to be babied. There is a difference between wanting some love and wanting to be babied. Some girls do just want to be babied but I am not them—I am strong. I’m Lilian freaking Collison.
I just could not wait until study hall because you could go to any classroom and I always choose Jasmine, the music teacher— my absolute favorite. I choose her every day last year, too. I believe that I am a little favorited but sometimes kids need that.
When it came time to go in there, I sat next to the girl I usually do. Her name was Ashley, she does not talk much but she is very pretty. I sit by her in Music too.
Ugh, when I went into the room there was a sub. I rolled my eyes and had a seat; I must have dozed off in music or forgot. I was probably just mixed up in all of the drama.
“Where is Jasmine?” I asked Ashley, it was probably one of the first times that we actually talked. She gave me a sympathetic look, “Yes,” I asked as if she was hiding something.
“Oh, you didn’t hear. You poor child.” She looked sad while remembering. She knew how close of a relationship I had with Jasmine.
“No,” I said in confusion. Then, I got scared of what she was about to say. A sub, sympathetic looks, Oh goodness!
“She was fired, we don’t know why; she just was. After the incident with you and Natalie, Jasmine grabbed her stuff and left crying.”
“Oh,” I started and had to put my hand on my heart because it felt like it was going to fall out. “That is so sad what can we do to help?”
“Nothing, we cannot talk to her inside or outside of school grounds. Well, that’s the rumor.”
“Oh, she was the only teacher that cared for me I bet she is innocent, I mean with all the stuff Natalie starts!”
* * *
THAT DAY I WENT HOME how I used to before all the drama, and did my normal thing—well, I thought about it. I was sad about the school and the shocking news about Jasmine. So, instead of doing my normal thing, I turned on the Tv. Just so that I could have noise in the background.
I then went to my room and grabbed my favorite turquoise notebook. The one that I write all of my best ideas in.
After I sat down on the couch, I had to turn to one of the last pages of the notebook. I must have a lot of ideas. I wrote at the very top of the page, “ideas for Jasmine.”
Hmmm. A meal, prayers.
I did not really know what to do other than pray, I have never known anyone who lost a job. Let alone ever have to comfort anyone.
Later, I heard the front door open and got up to see who was there, Jackie and Jason were barely ever home that early but here they were. They never got home at the same time it was always either one or the other. Usually, Jason is home first.
I sat down at the kitchen table, and a tear ran down my face. I did try to hide it, but Jackie always notices, “What’s wrong,” she asked.
I did not want to pour out my feelings. Instead, I started bawling.
“What’s wrong dear,” she said as she wiped my tears with her shirt; the way a mother would.
I let my feelings flood. “School was hard!” Things came out from behind tears. “Jasmine was fired, Samantha and Allie ditched me, I still get bullied from Natalie, but nobody will believe me because she has her fingers wrapped around everyone’s neck.” Sob. “Please take me out of school!” I pleaded.
“What?” Jackie asked, in her surprised tone. I do not know which part she was talking about, so I just replied:
“Yeah, I guess all the stuff that happened with Natalie that day didn’t just fire at me it fired at Jasmine. She—Natalie is the reason someone doesn’t have a job.”
“I’m sorry Lilian,” Jackie sat down next to me and gave me a huge hug.
I was depressed because Jasmine was the best teacher at that school. Also, I was very perturbed because it was not in Jasmine’s blood to ever hurt anybody. She went to church with us and was the teacher over the kid’s church program.
Since I went to church with her, I was surprised that I had just that day found out about Jasmine earlier. Jackie put food in front of me and I stuck a fork in it and played around with the food.
Remembering back to Sunday, Jasmine was acting a little off. The thing is Ashley said that she was not allowed to talk to us. Maybe nobody cared about it or maybe Ashley was over exaggerating. I hoped it was the second one.
“I just don’t understand!” I complained as Jackie sat down. “How can she just be fired like that? Doesn’t it take a process in the real world?”
“I don’t know baby,” Jackie replied in a caring voice, “I think that the church should do something for her.”
“Yeah, but what will you guys do?”
“I’m not sure but please eat your food and not play with it.”
I did not listen to Jackie and continued playing with my food. I was not in the mood for eating. Though I finally forced down a few bites before the depression got a hold of me and made me feel disgusting. I took my shower and brushed my teeth with a feeling of brokenness. After that, I went and laid in my bed, still feeling sad about Jasmine.
I could not fall asleep because of those dang emotions. Why? Why? Why? I ended up crying myself to sleep.
At least I had a good dream! It was all about California. We went to the beach; we went to some shows. I even found my father! That made me so happy.
Everything was 100% great. All of a sudden, I was abruptly pulled out of my happy coma waking up to the reverberating alarm clock’s annoying blurbs of noise.
My eyes burned with sleep, I looked at my clock. “Two o’clock?” I grunted loudly.
I turned off my reverberating alarm and wondered why it was going off at some weird time. I closed my eyes. Why when you try to go back to sleep you really have to pee?
So, I got up to go pee. By then, I was already fully awake other than my eyes were really red in the mirror. I laid back down, yep sleep was not going to happen for me.
I decided to stay awake, turned on my light, grabbed my novel, and finally finished the book.
I tiredly trudged over to my bookshelf and nonchalantly pulled a book off of the bookshelf. I then sat on my bed and began to read one, I had read the book before but decided to read it again because I was bored and why not? I ended up falling back asleep with the book in my hand and the light on.
That morning, Jackie and Jason’s alarm clock went off at a different time as well, they ended up sleeping until seven. It was a rush to get ready that morning—except for me who only had to throw on a sweatshirt and some sweatpants. My boobs are way too small for people to notice.
I walked to school and got to school on time even though Jackie and Jason were both late to work because of their alarm clocks going off.
I was lonely until I walked into the gym and walked up to Hayden. I put my head on his shoulder. “I’m so tired, my alarm went off at two and I didn’t sleep after that. Well, I fell back asleep for about an hour but that is not important. Anyway, did you do your homework?”
“Do I ever do my homework?” Hayden replied with that cute Hayden smirk.
“Good point, do you want to go to the library and do our homework?”
“Yeah sure, do you want to call it a date?” He said flirting.
“Let’s do it,” Hayden grabbed his backpack and followed me to the library. We sat down at a small table and pulled out our homework.
When I pulled out my homework, I noticed that I actually had done it, “Well, it looks like I did actually do my homework. Want to just copy my answers?”
“Nah, I’m good. I actually did mine too,” he smiled at me and I laughed, and I rolled my eyes.
“Well, we still have almost thirty minutes until school starts, what do you want to do?”
“Want to just walk around in here?”
“That sounds good to me,” I replied precisely.
Hayden hoped that no one would see them loitering around the library because he was planning on kissing me.
Hayden stopped and turned to me and I stopped also and asked, “What? Why did you stop?”
Hayden had nothing to say so he said, “I don’t know, why did you stop? Lilian, there is something I need to tell you,” it was obvious he was nervous. He was sweating a lot! He also was as red as a tomato.
“What is it?” I asked concerned.
“I love you,” he said while going in for a kiss, which I had mistaken for a hug.
“I love you too,” I said while hugging him and I kissed him on the cheek, then Hayden noticed that he had not fully failed.
Natalie, who was standing behind the bookshelf following them and was mad so, the first thing she did was report to Mr. Sweetie. Natalie even missed part of her first class because she was talking to the principal.
“You know how I am supposed to report to you if Lilian and Hayden are hanging out?” Natalie said in her perky princess voice.
“Yes,” Mr. Sweetie said not paying attention while he was typing something on his computer.
“I saw them hanging out and they even said, ‘I love you’ to each other. That is absolutely disgusting, I think we need to consider expulsion.”
“Natalie go to class; I will watch the camera.” He was still half paying attention he was remarkably busy and tired and didn’t feel like dealing with his granddaughter’s shenanigans.
“Yes, but do something quick they are endangering our school, but bye see you later!” Natalie said as she slammed the door then she grabbed a hall pass and went to her first hour.
Mr. Sweetie watched the videos and thought to himself, ‘did I really ask her to report to me if she saw them hanging out?’ He started to realize that Natalie was targeting Lilian. It is kind of funny how teachers can’t even identify bullies.
Then Mr. Sweetie started to think hard really hard for a few seconds about how the whole thing with Lilian and Natalie was weird and did not really sound like the truth. Ten minutes into his detective project, there was a knock on the door. Two boys with bloody noses and a teacher holding their wrists walked in.
* * *
I DECIDED TO GO TO music with a tear down my face because Jasmine was not going to be there. I was a tad bit late, but I really did not care.
Jasmine’s long-term sub’s name was Mr. Eric, well that is what we called him. Mr. Eric was about 60 years old, and all he cares about is music. He was very rude, especially to me. After all, he thought that I was babied especially by Jasmine, because - of course - he had heard the stories. I kind of wanted to know what the teachers said about me.
In class, we sang the Star-Spangled Banner and were paired in twos. I got paired with Ashley ‘the shy girl.’
Ashley was the girl that told me everything about Jasmine. She was also the girl that I sat with every day. I looked at her, into her puppy eyes, and realized something shocking. She was the girl from that scary, old, creaky house.
Mr. Eric announced that whoever we sang the Star-Spangled Banner with had an assignment with. The assignment was especially important, we had to write a song. The criteria only had three parts—a beginning, chorus, and ending. Also, with the assignment, we would be performing. We would not be performing in front of just our class but the whole school. Making it a contest. “Let the best win!”
The bell rang and it was time for lunch, everyone was shocked by their new assignment.
At lunch, I sat next to Ashley- no one ever did, and I felt pity in my heart for her. We started to talk about our song and a good deed that we were going to do for Jasmine.
Finally, someone told us it could get Jasmine in big trouble if a student went and talked to her and it would help her more if they left her alone. It made me super mad, I had heard that before and I call bull crap.
“It won’t get her in trouble, she still teaches a bible school class at my church,” I told the kid while rolling my eyes.
“I’m sorry, but I’m reporting her,” the kid replied in a snotty tone, I am surprised it was not Natalie.
“Well, let the power of God be with you,” I replied in a sassy manner.
“Whatever major losers, bye,” he said leaving.
Hayden sat down next to me, and he looked at that kid with a stink eye, as the kid left the table. He waited till the kid was a little way away to say, “I don’t like that kid.”
“Why, who is he?” I asked innocently.
“His name is Flynn, Flynn West. He is just rude and always thinks he is right.”
“Oh, what did he do to you to make you hate him?” I asked knowing that Hayden only did not like someone if he had a reason.
“We were at Conner’s birthday party, he was turning eight, I ordered a large fry, and I sat next to Flynn because he was alone. I got up to get some napkins because I spilled the ketchup and the next thing I knew, my fries were gone and replaced with a small. He told me that I must have ordered a small, but I knew that I ordered a large, and my large fry was in his trash pile,” Hayden said.
“Are you serious?” I said laughing, “Gosh you can hold a grudge.”
“Hey, Lilian I am going to go to my next class,” Ashley gave a shy smile and suddenly left. I think Hayden was intimidating her.
Ashley was a sweet girl with a not-so-sweet background. Her mother was in and out of prison, and her father works hard and does not get paid much. Her father is trying to go back to school but does not have the money.