And … ACTION!
Herb Gustafson, or rather Josh Hartnett in what would surely go down as the worst role of his career, lay on the snow with a gaping head wound. Blood slowly trickled onto the white snow beside him. It spread out, diluting into a light pink, as though a child had spilled his Kool-aid.
“Ya shoulda just handed me the money, Herb,” said Ken, aka Mike Cameron. “I had to go and kill ya, don’t ya know.”
A burlap bag with a dollar sign on the side rested at Hartnett’s side. Cameron kicked it, and it flew several yards past the camera.
“I better get you into the wood chipper toot sweet,” said Mike Cameron. “There’s a cold front comin’ in.”
Cameron grabbed Hartnett by the armpits and dragged him, a trail of fake blood smearing through the snow.
“Mike, sorry, but we have to film that over again,” said Maura into the megaphone. “The bag of money can’t appear that light.”
If Mike Cameron heard anything, he made no sign of it. He continued to drag the limp body of Josh Hartnett.
“Mike, end scene. We have to re-film,” repeated Maura.
Cameron pulled Hartnett right next to the wood chipper. Then he began to lift up.
“This won’t hurt a bit,” spoke Cameron into Josh Hartnett’s ear.
The seemingly lifeless body of Herb Gustafson suddenly lurched forward. “That’s not in the script,” said Hartnett. “What’s going on here?” Mike Cameron was reaching in his pocket when Detective Doyle Malloy, specialist in celebrity cases, made his first ever major motion picture appearance. Holding the burlap sack, he ran onto the scene and tossed the sack into the wood chipper. It sprayed out in a thousand pieces, along with the goose feathers it contained. It looked like snow. Brownish snow.
“Oh, shit,” Hartnett began to say, but was cut short when a blade lightly touched his throat.
Doyle saw the knife in Cameron’s hand was stained with red. He wondered if William suddenly felt a phantom pain in his side.
Maura Coen couldn’t see the blade from her vantage point, but she stared at the wood chipper with horror. “Ronald? Who was in charge—?” she asked, but Winthrop was nowhere to be seen. She grabbed the megaphone and directed it towards the police officers, who were watching the scene with confusion. “This isn’t in the script. He’s going to kill Josh Hartnett!”
Within moments, several guns were pointed at Mike Cameron, including those of Deputy Chief Severson and Officer Daniels. Doyle saw that Amanda was empty handed, and she was looking around wildly towards one side of the set. Doyle tried to make out what Amanda was looking at, but the lights were directly in his eyes.
“We can’t let him die,” said Deputy Chief Severson to Officer Daniels. “My wife loves him.”
“Keep rolling film!” shouted Mike Cameron. His eyes darted around the park, as if searching for something in particular, although Doyle couldn’t determine what it was. A way out, perhaps?
Doyle felt a tug on his sleeve. Amanda attempted to pull him away from the set back into the crowd, but Mike Cameron yelled, “Don’t move, or I’ll slit his throat!”
Doyle didn’t move, although he definitely felt like soiling himself.
Not taking her eyes off Cameron, Amanda whispered into Doyle’s ear, “William took my gun.”
“Oh, boy,” said Doyle.
“What’s he waiting for?” asked Amanda.
“Probably a clear shot.”
“No, not William,” said Amanda. “Cameron. He’s not making any moves. It seemed like he had this planned out.”
“Maybe something’s changed.”
Mike Cameron was twitching. Doyle couldn’t tell if he was extremely nervous or extremely high from the cocaine. Possibly both, thought Doyle. Not a good combination.
Doyle heard Josh Hartnett say, “Can we talk about this? I could hook you up with my agent. Maybe get you some good parts.”
“Shut up, Hartnett. The only parts you’ll be giving me will be coming out of the side of this machine.”
The on-lookers closest to the scene groaned when they heard Cameron’s comment.
“Doyle, I really don’t want to see Josh Hartnett turned into haggis,” said Amanda. “What should we do?”
Doyle sighed. “All right. I’ll take care of it.”
“What? Wait! No.” Amanda tried grabbing him, but Doyle had already walked directly to Mike Cameron.
Cameron stiffened when Doyle approached, and Josh Hartnett let out a yelp.
“Whoa, let’s take it easy,” said Doyle. “No one wants to get hurt. I’m sure we can work this out.”
“If you take one more step, I’ll toss him right into this wood chipper,” said Cameron. “Do you want to be responsible for that? Then get the fuck away from me!”
“Let’s settle down,” said Doyle. “You’re not going to toss anyone into a wood chipper.”
“Oh, really?” Cameron had another violent twitch, putting Josh Hartnett into a panic.
“What the hell, man! You’re not helping!” blurted Hartnett.
“He’s right,” said Cameron. “You’re not very good at this, are you? I could’ve been in handcuffs long before it came to this, but you were too blind.”
“Hey, let’s not get personal,” said Doyle. “You had us fooled. You’re a very talented actor.”
Mike Cameron regally straightened himself and smiled. “Why, thank you. But flattery will get you nowhere.”
“You didn’t let me finish,” said Doyle. “You’re a talented actor, but you’re not terribly bright.”
Cameron’s smile disappeared. “Is that so?”
“Shit,” muttered Hartnett.
“Shit,” said Amanda, shaking her head.
“Please, enlighten me, Detective. What leads you to believe that I’m not so bright?” asked Cameron.
“You could have kept us fooled. Continued to act your part. Finished the movie. Maybe we would have figured out you murdered Wilde. But then again, maybe not. You could have gotten away with murder.”
“Maybe,” said Cameron.
“But instead, you made your big move today. You were planning on killing Josh Hartnett. But you didn’t. Instead of just tossing him in the wood chipper, you hesitated. You brought a knife to his neck. Now, you’re just biding your time.”
Cameron didn’t look pleased.
“So what changed, Mike?” asked Doyle. “Did you have a planned escape? Did the getaway car not show up? Did Eva turn her back on you?”
Mike Cameron smirked. “I guess you have it all figured out. So what do you think I’m going to do now?”
“You have two options,” said Doyle.
Mike twitched. “I’m listening.”
“You can put down the knife. You’ll be arrested for one murder instead of two. You’d probably serve some prison time, but you’d be out eventually.”
“I don’t like that option,” said Cameron.
“Or …“
“Yes?”
“You’ve been threatening to murder your only chance out of here. Instead of grinding this young actor into coleslaw, use him as a hostage.
Walk out of here. Steal a car. Drive off into the sunset.”
Josh Hartnett’s eyebrows curved into a very distinguished WTF expression.
“I’m not an idiot,” said Cameron. “I know it’s not that simple.”
“It’s a chance,” said Doyle.
Mike Cameron looked around. He was twitching a lot now. His forehead was damp with sweat.
Doyle could tell he was nervous, but he was also considering his options.
“Fine,” said Cameron, yanking Josh Hartnett directly in front of him. Mike Cameron walked backwards, using Hartnett like a shield.
As soon as he took a step behind the wood chipper, which led towards the woods and eventually the road to freedom, a shot rang out.
An audible thump followed.
Officer Daniels and Chief Deputy Severson immediately ran behind the wood chipper to see what had transpired.
Amanda grabbed Doyle’s hand, and as they ran to catch up with
Daniels and Severson, Amanda asked, “What just happened?”
“He made the wrong choice,” said Doyle.
WILLIAM WRIGHT HELD THE GUN he’d used to shoot Mike Cameron. He continued to point it at Cameron as Cameron hacked up blood, due to the sizeable and likely unpleasant hole in his chest.
Deputy Chief Severson removed the gun from William’s hand. “That’s enough, Detective.”
Josh Hartnett was lying against a tree, catching his breath. Other than a few droplets of blood on his neck, he appeared unharmed.
Officer Daniels was on the walkie, requesting paramedics.
William kneeled down next to Cameron, who was fighting consciousness. “Where’s Eva?” asked William.
Doyle felt chilled by the lack of emotion William was expressing.
Cameron turned his head away, but William gently grabbed his chin and pulled. Looking directly into Cameron’s unfocused eyes, William repeated, “Where’s Eva?”
Mike Cameron attempted a couple chuckles before a blood bubble came out of his throat and burst.
“You still think—“ Cameron began to say, but the light faded from his eyes. Neither William, nor anyone else, would get answers from him. William stood up, but flinched from the pain in his side. He removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes.
“William—“ Doyle began to say.
“Give me a minute,” said William. “Please.”
When the paramedics arrived, they immediately went to Josh Hartnett and removed the droplets of blood from his neck.
“Are you okay, sir? Would you like a damp towel for your forehead?” asked one of the paramedics.
As Hartnett waved them away, Amanda said, “Gentlemen … this man over here got it much worse.”
Another paramedic saw Cameron and ran for a stretcher. Moments later, as they loaded up the body of Mike Cameron, Doyle overheard one of the paramedics whisper, “I can’t believe I just saved the life of Josh
Hartnett. My wife loves him.”
William surveyed the crowd of gawkers.
“What’s going on, William? You did the right thing, you know that, right?” said Doyle. “Listen, if you’re worried about Eva, they’ll catch her eventually.”
“We may have been wrong about that,” said William. “About her.”
“What do you mean?”
“Ask around, find out if there’s anyone unaccounted for,” said William.
“Someone was working with Cameron, and I don’t think it was Eva.”
“William, we’ve been through this …“
“I realize that, Doyle. But … the expression on his face …” said William. “He knew we were on the wrong track. He thought it was funny.”
“What are you going to do?” asked Doyle.
“I need to search where she last disappeared. The hospital.”
Deputy Chief Severson, who’d apparently overheard their conversation, put his hand on William’s shoulder. His other hand was still holding William’s recently fired gun.
“Detective Wright, I’m afraid I can’t allow you to leave just yet,” he said.
William bit back an impulsive response and instead asked, “Is there a problem, Chief?”
“You just shot and killed someone,” said Severson. “I don’t think the DA will charge you with anything, but this will still require a massive amount of paperwork. Needless to say, my weekend is in the shitter.”
“Put me in handcuffs, bring me to jail, do whatever you need to do,” said William. “But let me do this first.”
“He just killed the bad guy,” said Doyle. “That’s gotta be worth something.”
Severson’s contemplative expression suggested he did value what
William accomplished. “I have a better idea,” he said. “Let’s take my car.”
“Thank you,” said William. “Doyle, go speak with Maura Coen. I see her just beyond that maple tree, conversing with Tina Callahan. Find out right away if she knows of anyone missing.”
Doyle nodded. “Okay. Will do.”
As William and Severson were about to leave, Josh Hartnett approached William and shook his hand.
“I can’t tell you how thankful I am, Mister …“ said Hartnett. Other than looking haggard from a stressful day, he appeared healthy.
“Wright. William Wright.”
“William. You saved my life. I want you to know I’ll never forget it.”
William smiled. “You’re most welcome. I very much enjoyed your work in Milk.”
Doyle’s eyed widened. He whispered into William’s ear. “That was James Franco.”
Josh Hartnett graciously took the awkwardness in stride. “Not a problem. I’m just happy to be here.”
“Are you happy you signed on for this film?” asked Doyle.
“I’m firing my agent,” said Hartnett.
“Point taken,” said Doyle. He held out his hand. “It’s been a pleasure for me, too.”
They shook hands.