All six of us are together most weekends, going somewhere — like mini-adventures. One day of each weekend together is relaxing while the other is filled with some kind of physical activity or sport. The relaxing day is more for the two couples to have bedroom time with each other while Joe and I find something to do.
The relationship between Maggie and Henry has progressed rapidly. They had sex for the first time that Sunday night after we spent the first weekend at Nathan’s — just as I predicted. She’s told me all about it, of course. She didn’t leave out a single detail.
Nathan and Jared have been seeing each other more, but they haven’t officially declared that they’re dating. I’m curious to see if they take things farther this time with their relationship.
Joe and I have started to become friends, especially during the weekends when we’re actively avoiding the sounds of sex. He and I have a lot in common with our personalities and openly discuss a wide variety of topics, including business. I, of course, still leave out a lot of details about my family and past and he never inquires. I’m not sure if he’s being respectful or if the information has been disclosed by my friends. I’m hoping that it’s not the latter.
Joe and I have spent some time learning each other’s level of martial arts mastery by sparring. I can tell he’s holding back when we fight and I’m grateful for it. It’s not that I can’t handle the sparring. Whenever our bodies fully connect, I become a little distracted. He’s a handsome, sexy man. What woman wouldn’t get distracted being that close to him from time to time?
Today, Maggie and I just had our monthly in-person meeting for my media company. Everything is running smoothly, and with needing less time to talk business, we’re able to chat more about personal stuff. I’m excited to have my friend back — not that I really lost her, but more because she’s my only girlfriend and there are certain things you can only discuss with another woman.
Trying to break the ice, Maggie asks, “So, what’s going on between you and Joe?”
I look at her quizzically. “What are you talking about?”
“I swear there’s chemistry between you two, ” she says.
“Don’t even start,” I warn.
“Seriously? Nothing? Why not? He’s cute. He’s available. He’s—”
“He’s…a…friend. Nothing more,” I say, enunciating each word.
“Why can’t you be open to the possibility?”
“There is no possibility of anything other than a friendship. You know that. We’ve been through this several times now, Mags.”
“ I just don’t understand why you don’t want to be happy."
“I am happy. I’m happy with how I choose to live my life, and I’m happy that you are happy with how you choose to live yours. I just wish that you would be happy for me too,” I reply.
“I am happy for you…if you are really happy.” Maggie hangs her head a little. “He likes you, you know?”
“Mags, please,” I whine.
“That’s all I wanted to say.”
“I see him like I see Jared or Nathan. Just friends.”
“Jared and Nathan aren’t into women.”
I let out a huff.
There is sexual tension between Joe and me, I’ll admit that, but only to myself. Yes, it seems to be building a little bit more, but it’s only lust. As much as I want to put out that fire, I still refuse to break any of my own rules. I’m not sure to what extent Maggie means that Joe likes me, but it would just make things weirder if we did do anything.
“I have a confession to make,” Maggie says, barely peeking up at me.
“What?”
“I…um….”
“You didn’t hint to Joe that he might have a chance with me, did you?”
“What? No. God, no,” she says. “I…um….”
I cringe, not liking where this conversation is going.
“I told Henry about us.” Her face reddens and her eyes bounce between my face and the floor.
“You….” I pause, not knowing what to say. My mouth feels dry. “You, what?”
“I told Henry about us. Please don’t be mad at me.”
An uncontrollable giggle leaves my mouth. “You…told Henry…Wh…Wh….”
“We’re serious, Emma. And, if he’s the one. He needs to know me, accept me, and love all of me,” she says.
I completely agree with her. Any man that deserves her must love and accept her unconditionally. I’ve told her that since we became friends and she started dating.
“He knows it stays between us. He’s not to say anything to anyone.”
“I would hope so,” I reply.
“He’s completely accepting. He’s even said that if you or I ever need to, that we have his full support. He’s not looking to interact with you—”
“I would hope not.”
I would never sleep with any man she has dated, is dating, and now possibly, dare I say, eventually marrying. My body shivers at the thought. The last thing I would want to do is make our friendship awkward in any way.
“You’re funny. You know I would never ask that of you. I know where we stand, Emma. And, I love you for that. He’s willing to do whatever we, you and I, feel comfortable with.”
“I can’t believe you are telling me this.”
“Why wouldn’t I tell you this? We are family, and of course, I would tell you. I wanted to tell you first that I was planning on telling him, but it just came out the other day.”
I take a deep breath. “I’m just surprised that you’re telling me about this…now… just before we are supposed to go have lunch with him and Joe.”
“Oh! I thought it would be weirder if he knew and you didn’t during lunch. And, if I waited, you’d kill me.”
Another giggle escapes my mouth. “I just might kill you anyway.”
“Emma. Come on,” she pleas.
Pinching the bridge of my nose, I shake my head. Fear and dread surround me. I understand why she told Henry and I truly appreciate that she informed me. But seriously? Now? Right before we’re supposed to have lunch. Couldn’t she give me some time to process all of this?
“What’s done is done.”
Maggie hesitantly moves towards me. I know she wants to hug me, console me and herself, so I let her. Stepping towards her, I lean in to let her know that I’m not mad or hurt. I knew this day would eventually come, but I was just hoping to have more time. Patting her on the back reassuringly, I provide comfort as she sighs with relief.
Grabbing Sadie’s leash, I keep taking in deep breaths, trying to prepare my mind and body for seeing Henry. I think it would be a lot easier if Joe wasn’t going to be there, but then again, he could be the one thing that will prevent this topic from being mentioned.
The four of us and Sadie meet in front of the restaurant at the same time and exchange greetings. I watch and listen to Henry closely, but I don’t notice any odd behavior from him. This is comforting. Curiously, I study Joe as well. If he and Henry are such good friends, even though Maggie told Henry not to say anything, that doesn’t mean he won’t necessarily tell his best friend.
“So, Henry and I have made arrangements for a trip for all of us next month for our three-month anniversary.”
I look at Henry when she makes this statement and he doesn’t flinch. If anything, he’s just as excited at the announcement as Maggie. Most guys would be running by this point.
“We’re all going to….” She pauses temporarily for a dramatic effect. “Hawaii!” Maggie bounces in her seat.
“Awesome,” I reply.
“I know, right,” Maggie says. “It’s going to be so much fun. We can hike, swim, sail, jet ski, and so much more.”
Maggie and Henry speak excitedly about the trip, more to each other. When I glance at Joe, I see him fighting back a smile. Is he thinking what I’m thinking or amused by my expression?
“Does Jared know?” I ask.
“No, not yet. I was going to tell them later today,” Maggie says.
Maggie continues to talk about Hawaii and everything she’s learned since she and Henry started planning the trip. I listen contentedly, excited to go to Hawaii. I’ve never been, but my enthusiasm does not match the level of Maggie’s.
My mind starts to wander a little as Maggie sustains the topic of her and Henry’s anniversary. I start reviewing what she told me earlier before we left for lunch and start to study Henry’s face more closely. One would think that Henry and Maggie didn’t have a conversation about Maggie and me.
When Maggie takes a sip of her drink, I say, “I’ve got something for the two of you.”
“What?” Joe questions.
“You got them something?” Maggie asks with a fading smile.
Have I ever given her cause for concern? Would I ever give her cause for reservation? Okay, maybe. I laugh inwardly at the thought.
“Here,” I say, handing them each a wrapped package.
“I didn’t realize that you cared so much,” Joe teases.
“They might help with your classes,” I suggest.
“Ooh, that’s a great book!” Maggie squeaks as Henry unwraps his. “Emma made me read it before I started managing Raven Media.”
“Wow. Thanks, Emma!” Henry says.
“Thank you. This is awesome,” Joe adds, equally grateful. “I heard one of the guys in my class mention this book the other day — said it’s been helping.”
Maggie is beaming at my generosity, which concerns me a little. I’ve never given anything to any of her previous boyfriends, let alone their friends. Did I just openly accept Henry and Joe too soon? I should have made her sweat it out a little longer. Oh, well.
The guys and Maggie insist on a tour of Pasadena, so I begrudgingly agree since I’m outnumbered. We walk around Old Pas for about forty-five minutes before we hop on one of the local Metro buses to head east on Colorado to show them the Playhouse and continue by foot to the South Lake Avenue section. Maggie insists on showing them some more sites including the famous Rose Bowl and local museums.
Every time we get back into the car, Henry holds the front passenger door for Maggie at the same time Joe holds the back door for me. I need to give Maggie some credit. She did finally pick a gentleman this time around.
My mind begins an internal conflict with itself as the car glides over the streets. Outwardly, my body typically displaces the battle my thoughts engage in when one of my legs shakes rapidly. With the weight of Sadie’s head, my tension is released instead by tapping my right thumb on the side of my clutch repeatedly. My brain floods with chatter and noise which adds heat to the battle brewing inside me.
Suddenly, my attention is pulled away from its increasing dismay. My gaze finds a hand draped over mine with a thumb brushing lightly back and forth over my knuckles. Looking up, I catch a soothing expression on Joe’s face. The discomfort inside me subsides immensely at his gesture. I turn my hand to grasp his to keep me here in reality which pleasantly distracts me from the war inside.
I don’t want to mislead Joe and the thought presents itself temporarily. I squash it with the belief that he’s just being friendly. Joe’s large hand is warm and firm. I welcome the desire that stirs inside me from his touch that is pleasantly distracting.
As soon as we stop out front of my apartment complex, I immediately let go of Joe’s hand. He accepts the release and doesn’t show disappointment before rushing around to open the door for me.