The next day, Zack leaned against the wall of the bridal salon, feeling very much like the rooster in a hen house. Everywhere he looked he was surrounded by women. Women in white desperate to find the perfect dress. Women in black running here and there hunting the next potential gown, all the while calming fears and handing out tissues to mamas and grandmamas unprepared to let their babies go.
Then there were the women seated across from him wearing black sparkling shirts that read Bridesmaid, Maid of Honor, and Mother of the Bride.
While Kaity's girlfriends had opted to wear their shirts with blinged-out blue jeans, Becca wore black slacks that made her look much too thin, while Wynonna wore a white shirt beneath her T-shirt along with several strands of pearls. The sight was such a southern trademark, he lifted his camera near his chest as though checking a setting and focused on the image on the screen, letting the shutter click several times.
Becca had her head down and was scribbling notes in a binder. He couldn't imagine keeping track of all the details of a wedding this size, but she seemed to be in her element when it came to organizing.
As though sensing his perusal, Becca lifted her head and their gazes met. His finger tightened automatically and once more the shutter clicked. He removed his finger from the button, hoping the nearly-silent whirl of the camera couldn't be heard given the noise of music and chatter and laughter in the salon.
But the phone call he'd received enroute to the location had shaken him and now he wondered...
Leave things be. Focus on the job and let sleeping dogs lie.
"Here we go, ladies," one of the black-clad workers said as she followed Kaity into the mirrored area where her bridal party sat.
Due to the wedding date being so close at hand, apparently Kaity was being forced to buy "off the rack," which upset Wynonna to no end. From what Zack had gathered from the bits and pieces of conversation he'd overheard, that meant available dresses were considerably numbered.
Who knew all this wedding stuff was so complicated?
Zack lifted his camera, snapping several shots of Kaity's reflection in the mirror from over her shoulder to get both the front and back of the massive ballgown.
"It's beautiful," Kaity murmured, but a frown pinched her eyebrows overtop of her nose. "But..."
"If there's a "but" then it's not the one," Becca quickly interjected before Wynonna could comment.
The dress had been Wynonna's choice from the wall of available gowns, but Zack agreed with Becca's statement. The dress swallowed Kaity and took away from the bride because of its size.
"Girls?" Kaity asked.
The bridal party shook their heads, each woman giving Wynonna a pained smile of apology.
While Kaity and the attendant retreated to the dressing room to change, Zack found himself watching Eli. He'd almost forgotten Becca's son had come along, but given the boy's silence it was easy to misplace him.
Zack frowned, realizing that he had yet to hear the boy make any sound. That wasn't normal. Not for a kid Eli's age. Emma and her besties had quite a few munchkins running around and quiet was never a word that could be used to describe any of them. But Eli...
Zack watched as the boy played with several cars on the floor of the salon. In typical kid fashion, he spun on his knees as he drove them, sometimes crashing them before starting all over again.
Kaity reappeared in several more gowns. All were beautiful but one by one they were rejected for being too simple, too fussy, too sparkly, the skirts too full. It made Zack appreciate the fact that all he had to do to prepare for his job as photographer was put on his tuxedo.
"Well?" Kaity asked, entering the showing area once more.
Zack turned and straightened from his slouched position, taken in by the sweet beauty of the woman in front of him. Zack lifted his camera and took more photos, his mind working overtime on how he could layout this portion of the magazine spread to best feature the bride.
Oohs and ahhs sounded from the ladies in waiting and he quickly swung his camera around to capture the moment. But it was Becca's expression that caused his heart to still before it picked up speed. Tears brightened her eyes and made them sparkle like the majestic blue-green of the ocean, her expression happy, yet sad and wistful.
"Say something," Kaity said. "This is Becca's pick. What do you think?"
All the women spoke at once, detailing what they loved about the dress.
"That's the one."
"Oh, Kaity, it's perfect!"
"Just gorgeous."
"Mama?" Kaity asked, tensing a bit as she faced Wynonna.
"It's beautiful, Kaity. Quite breathtaking. I didn't expect to find something so beautiful under the time constraints. Your sister chose well."
Kaity beamed and Zack captured the shot, going on to take several more as the attendant and her manager brought out a veil and earrings. In a matter of minutes Kaity was decked out in full wedding attire and Zack continued to shoot the moment, careful to get the expressions of the ladies in the background as well as when Kaity said yes to the dress.
When the moment was over Zack watched as the ladies stood and began gathering up their things. Wynonna left the area entirely to pay for the gown, and the bridesmaids chatted with Becca about the luncheon to follow before heading off to go to the restaurant.
Kaity gathered her binder and placed it in a large tote bag.
"I could see you in that dress."
Becca turned, looking visibly startled by his words but no more so than he was to have blurted them out. It was true, though. The dress looked beautiful on Kaity but in his mind he'd pictured Becca wearing the gown and--
"I have to go."
"You have to wait on Kaity," Zack countered, stepping in front of her when she looked ready to bolt.
"Zack..."
"What? It was just a statement."
"One you have no business saying to me."
"Why not? It's not like we didn't talk about getting married."
Becca closed her eyes and kept them shut for several seconds. Behind her, Eli continued to play, oblivious as kids usually were when engrossed in something.
"Please don't..."
"Remember when you told me about your dream? How we had gotten married and you wore a white dress and--"
"Stop it," she said, lowering her voice and looking around nervously.
"Why?" He watched her closely, noted the changes ten years had taken on her.
"Because it's-- We can't go back. It's too late. It was too late then but it's even more impossible now."
The tip of her nose turned pink and he saw the battle waging behind her eyes. Her words created a fist in his gut, and he wished he could read her mind. "It's never too late, Becca. Especially since you're not married anymore."
Kaity told you?" Becca demanded. How could she? Why would she?
"Sit down."
"No, I--" The dizziness creeping up on her truly hit her and she found herself grateful for Zack's hold on her arm, firmly but gently guiding her into one of the seats behind her. "I can't believe she'd--"
"Kaity didn't tell me about the divorce."
She shook her head, confused.
"I made a phone call," Zack admitted. "That was all it took."
"But-- how? To whom?"
Zack quickly explained the connection between his newfound family and the security business ran by Duncan MacGregor.
"You're-- Mrs. Dibbs?" she asked, thoroughly flabbergasted by the fact one of the nicest, sweetest elementary teachers she'd ever had was capable of such a thing. An affair and-- to give Zack up for adoption?
Zack nodded, his expression grim as he stared at her.
"Look, none of that matters now. Why do you still wear his ring after what the guy did to you?"
Becca floundered beneath the weight of Zack's stare and the heavy awareness of what he now knew. If he was aware of the divorce, it stood to reason he was also aware of Eli's condition. "Please, I can't talk about this. Not now. Not here. Kaity will be out any second. And my mother... They don't-- She doesn't... Zack, please."
The way she fumbled for words must have triggered Zack's suspicions because his frown deepened and a sound of frustration emerged from his throat.
"Are you telling me that they don't know you're divorced?"
"Shhh!" Becca stared into Zack's face and prayed. She prayed for help. Prayed for the words. Prayed for deliverance from the mess she'd made of her life. "No," she whispered, glancing over her shoulder. "They don't. K-Kaity knows some but not all. Zack, please. You can't say anything."
"You're not going to tell them?" he asked, sounding incredulous.
"I am. I will. But when the time is right," she said, using the same lame excuse she'd used with her sister and hating herself for it. "I have to... work up to it. There's just so much happening right now. The wedding, the holidays..."
"You haven't changed at all, have you? You're still the same girl with no backbone."
Becca drew back against the seat, the words cutting through her like a knife. "That's easy for you to say. You don't know what it's like. You didn't grow up in a family like mine where the expectations and demands are so high, you--you don't ever want to disappoint."
"They're adults. Disappointment is a fact of life. Face it, Becca, you haven't told them because you still can't stand up to them. You're a grown woman but nothing's changed, has it?"
"I'm ready--and starving," Kaity said as she walked down the wall from the dressing area. "Do you think we can-- Oh."
Zack stood from where he'd seated himself beside of her during the exchange and stalked over to where he'd left his camera bag by the mirrors.
"Um... is everything okay?" Kaity asked, splitting her attention between them.
"Fine," Zack said. "I'll see you at the restaurant."
Becca remained seated, her legs trembling too hard to hold her weight.
"What just happened?" Kaity asked, taking the seat Zack had vacated before stalking out of the viewing area.
"Nothing."
"Don't give me that. Bex, talk to me."
Becca lifted her head and met her sister's gaze. "He knows."
Kaity's eyes widened for a moment before a smile spread across her face. "Really? That's perfect!"
"No, Kaity, that isn't perfect. None of this is perfect," Becca argued. "What are you doing? How could you hire Zack? Couldn't you have talked to me about it first?"
"I could have. But you would've said no."
"For good reason!" she said, struggling to keep her voice down. "I don't know why after the total disaster ten years ago, but I know you're trying to matchmake. Don't deny it."
"I wasn't going to," Kaity said boldly, lifting a hand to smooth Becca's hair. "Bex, you did what Mama and Daddy wanted you to do back then and I don't blame you. But what I do know is it's time to do what you want to do. To live your life. I just want you to be happy and when I talked to you and you sounded so sad on the phone, I don't know... It just made me wonder if things were different now. And since you and Zack are both single..."
"You think we could pick up where we left off," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. Kaity didn't know the whole story. She didn't, otherwise she'd know just how impossible that statement was.
Even if her mother and father would accept Zack into the family--which would never happen--there were the lies she'd told. The things she'd said to him. All because she lacked the backbone to stand up for herself, as Zack had pointed out.
"Bex, you were happy with him. I know I was young that summer but... I've never seen you like that. And I've definitely not seen you like that since then. Yes, you were happy with your marriage until you found out about the affair and all the awful stuff, but during your marriage? I never saw you light up about Elliot the way you did just talking about Zack."
"I was a stupid kid." Becca stared down at her hands, at the obnoxiously large ring on her left hand. She'd asked for something small and simple, vintage, but Elliot had insisted on large and gaudy to impress his boss and friends. Another example of how money couldn't buy happiness.
"You were in love," Kaity said. "Love isn't stupid."
"Oh, Kaity. Even if I were interested in Zack--which I'm not--Mama and Daddy would never--"
"Bex, it's not their life. You married a man they approved of and look what happened? I know this is all weird and sudden for you, but I've gotten to know Zack a little better over the last couple of years. The rough kid Daddy saw isn't there anymore. He's a grown man with a flourishing business, he goes to church with his sister and family. Things are different now. If I can see the changes, maybe Daddy and Mama can, too."
It wasn't possible. It just wasn't.
Because Zack would never forgive her if he knew the real truth of why and how she'd left him.