“Campfire!” Suri shouted down the hatch.
Nico woke with a start from the hard plank of the windship bunk. She didn’t remember falling asleep. She must have strained her magic propelling across the Lake. It was hard not to keep going when Nico was so close.
Nico rushed up the ladder to the deck and peered through the morning haze. Her chest tightened at the sight of smoke and flickering firelight, a glowing eye blinking atop the encroaching mountain range.
For the past two days, Nico had wondered why Rasia had broken her pattern. Had Rasia finally stopped because she thought herself secure enough to make camp, smug in the knowledge Nico would never catch up? If so, nothing felt more satisfying than determination and dedication finally triumphing over carelessness and complacency.
Kelin joined Nico by the railing and mused, “Awfully bold of her. Anyone can see that fire for drums around.”
“It doesn’t matter. We did it. We finally caught up.”
“Could be scavengers. Could be a trap.”
“It’s her,” Nico said, confident. “Azan, approach the range at an angle. Hopefully, they haven’t seen us just yet.”
Nico feared another chase. The campfire left Rasia exposed, but no doubt the high elevation offered greater visibility. Rasia might be expecting them, and Nico needed to be ready to cut her off.
They anchored the windship out of sight of Rasia’s campfire, hugging the rock-shadow. They readied their weapons.
Suri slung her quiver and bow over her shoulder. Azan hefted his great fan axe, and Kelin dripped sharp with his talon dagger.
They walked the rest of the distance, hoping to maintain the element of surprise. Eventually, they came upon a trail leading farther up the mountain. Nico noted signs of recent passage. She crouched to the grass and listened to the plant water.
“No one has come this way since this morning. If they sighted us, they’re no doubt rushing down the mountain now. Suri and Azan, see if you can find their ship and commandeer it. Kelin and I will go up the mountain path.”
Suri hesitated. “You’re choosing him to go with you?”
“I need you to find Rasia’s windship, Suri. If we can cut off her means of escape, she’ll have nowhere to go.” Nico hastened up the trail to avoid further argument.
Kelin followed behind her and fell in step once the trail wound out of view.
“She really doesn’t like me, does she?” Kelin asked.
“You haven’t bothered to make any effort to change that.”
“Seems like a her problem to me.”
“You don’t give her the chance to know you,” Nico said, but perhaps Nico was being unfair. Who would want to play nice with someone who regarded you with such open disdain? “No, you’re right. Besides, it’s not about you anyway.”
“You mean, since you rejected her?”
Nico paused and spun to face Kelin. She hadn’t known anyone had overheard that conversation. Kelin gave a slick smile and an exaggerated shrug of his shoulders. Nico rolled her eyes. “That’s enough talk of Suri. We need to focus on the mission at hand. I’m relying on your help with Rasia. Ready?”
“Always.”
Nico might not trust Kelin in a dragon fight, but he’d been trained by the Flock. Nico hoped Kelin could be the edge Rasia didn’t see coming.
Nico hiked around rocks and scraggy trees to encounter a tower of shadows. The bright sun framed the obstacle. Kelin tensed beside her. Nico squinted. The shadows came into view as Nico drew closer. The shapeless mass solidified into the hunch of shoulders and a familiar face Nico knew all too well.
Zephyr slid from the rock where he sat waiting for her.
They stared at each other, like one would test a mirage. Then Nico and Zephyr rushed forward, and Nico found herself swallowed by his hug. He smelled of figs and fire smoke. She plastered herself against his brick chest and was swallowed by bicep walls. She was so relieved to see him.
An incredulous scoff interrupted their hug.
“And here I thought I had discovered some secret tent faction conspiracy.” Kelin rolled his eyes with such sass. “Nope. Just a pair of flame-whipped kids.”
“I told you,” Nico said, as she separated, then blushed. “Wait, not the flame-whipped part, just the . . .” Kelin’s brows raised, and Nico didn’t have the time to argue over a point she might be lying about anyway.
Zephyr looked more than a little amused by her fluster, with a smile showing off the dimples. Every time they met, it was as if the breath was knocked out of her.
A few years ago, when Ava-ta died, Nico had told Zephyr she feared becoming Kenji-ta, so crushed by the loss of his entire world and unable to function. Zephyr could be that possibility, and it frightened her, that potential for wreckage and destruction. It was why, out of self-preservation, she’d always kept a certain distance. She was reminded of that choice every time she saw him.
“Where are Kai and Rasia?” Nico asked, trying to get herself back on track.
Zephyr crossed his arms, his biceps bulging. “Gone. Snuck off while I slept. Missed them by several drums.”
No. That can’t be right.
Nico snatched the map container from her belt and shook the papyrus out of the oblong gourd. She tucked the container under her arm and shook out the map now marred by permanent stains.
Nico spat. She watched in horror as the line of spit fled further and further away from her position.
She should have checked the map when Suri woke her. Nico had been so sure. Nico had thought she’d finally caught up, that Rasia’s arrogance had been her downfall, but in the end, Nico’s downfall had been her own. Even with all Nico’s determination and all her effort and all her magic and every ounce of everything she had to give, it still wasn’t enough.
She wasn’t enough.
Nico and Zephyr started down the mountain path, but somewhere in the middle of Zephyr’s tale, Nico had to sit down to process it all. Zephyr joined her atop the wide rock shelf.
Nico listened to Zephyr’s stories of Kai ramming a gran-scorpion with a windship, to Rasia and Kai’s apparent relationship, to Kai falling into the Lake of Yestermorrow, to the promises Rasia made him.
Nico stared blankly down the trail, toward the direction where she had sent Kelin ahead to update Azan and Suri while she and Zephyr privately caught up.
Loose strands of hair itched at Nico’s neck. She pulled off the dragonglass holder and corrected her ponytail, thinking. Nico battled and warred with her thoughts. Emotions stormed through her chest. She didn’t know what impossible place to start first. After several failed attempts, the first question finally dropped from her lips.
“Rasia has a flame for Kai?”
“So massive you could probably see it from here. Kai had broken things off with her, but I knew that wasn’t going to last long. Caught them making out right down the trail yesterday.”
“I just . . .” Nico shook her head, unable to visualize Kai and Rasia together.
“They can be good for each other,” Zephyr admitted. “When Rasia is on deck, she’s everywhere. She doesn’t stop moving. It’s exhausting watching her all day. But if Kai is there too, she orbits him. She sprawls, springs, and laughs all over him. He anchors her, and Kai flourishes at the center of her attention. The flame between them, I don’t know if it’s going to burn them up or forge into something. I’m certain it wasn’t Rasia’s idea to leave me here. That was Kai.”
“You’re suggesting Rasia is a good thing? She pushed him into the Yestermorrow Lake. He almost died because of her!”
“It was an accident, and there’s fault on both sides,” Zephyr admitted. “Rasia is the one who dived into those waters. She’s the one who brought him back out, and ultimately is the one who woke him up. For all Rasia’s faults, she does care about him in her own way.”
Nico shook her head. This Rasia who put someone else’s life above ambition wasn’t the one she knew. Nico wasn’t sure she recognized Kai, either—this jih that laughed, and smiled, and could steer a windship.
Nico glanced back at Zephyr. He had told her everything, or at least everything he felt was within his right to say. She didn’t know how she felt about the kiss between Zephyr and Kai. Maybe she was a little jealous, even though she was the one who had told Zephyr to move on. She did think Zephyr could have been good for Kai and wondered how things could have been if the bones had landed differently, or at least, unmanipulated. But instead . . . it had to be Rasia.
Nico pressed her lips together and remembered Azan’s and Kelin’s certainties after the chase. She ventured to ask, “Are they having sex?”
Zephyr put a little too much effort at keeping his face blank. Anyone else would have missed it, but Nico knew the signs of Zephyr gliding over a lie. He sighed, knowing he’d been caught out. “Kai promised they were being safe.”
“Safe? Kai didn’t go to school. What does he know about safe?”
“I didn’t go to school either, but it’s not all that complicated. You put a dick in a vagina and a baby comes out nine blinks later. Do you really need to know more than that? Kai will be fine.”
Nico rubbed her eyes. She understood tent kids had underage sex all the time, that if you were smart about it, it wasn’t a big deal. But kullers had so much more to lose if they were caught. Kai could lose his life. She worried. “You think this is going to continue? Even after the Forging?”
Everyone knew Forging flames didn’t last.
“I don’t know, Nico.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Nico said, shaking her head. “Regardless of their relationship, it does not change the fact Rasia has got it in Kai’s head to slay a dragon. We ran into that dragon. Even with my magic, I could barely hold my own against it. Someone needs to get a hold of Kai and pull his head out the clouds.”
“Nico. I know you don’t want to hear this, but Kai is not going anywhere without that dragon. If you aren’t careful, you’re going to push him away. This is what Kai has chosen. This is what he wants.” Zephyr’s voice gentled, that soft, patient voice he so often used with his little jih. “It doesn’t make sense to chase after him anymore. He’s on his Forging path. It’s time for you to sail yours.”
“But do you truly think they can slay a dragon alone?”
Zephyr grew quiet at that. “I don’t know.”
Perhaps Nico could finally accept this was what Kai wanted, but that didn’t mean Nico should let him do it by himself. He needed help. The chase wasn’t over. She still needed to find him.
“I’m sorry,” Zephyr said. Nico turned, alarmed by the distress breaking through Zephyr’s voice. “I failed my promise to you. I promised to protect Kai, but because I couldn’t listen, he almost died. I failed him, and I’ve failed you.”
Nico pulled herself out of her own problems and fully studied her friend. Zephyr wasn’t the sort of person to beat himself up over things out of his control. That was normally Nico. She pressed a hand to his back because she sensed he needed it. He’d gotten so much bigger than her over the years, and it was so easy to forget how Zephyr was the one who always craved the hugs and comfort.
People looked at Zephyr and saw a mountain, but she remembered when he was soft-clay and mud. The exterior might have hardened over the years to protect those soft insides against spiteful strangers and a hateful world, but Zephyr had always let his guard down around her. The protective shroud Zephyr wore unraveled, and exhaustion and guilt overcame his face.
Nico asked, softly, “Are you okay?”
Zephyr opened his mouth to answer, then closed it after a long moment. He dropped his head in his hands, like a kuller, like his tah. “I don’t know. I . . . no. No, I’m not. I should have told you that night before the Forging, but I feared you’d look at me different.”
“Zephyr, what’s wrong?”
Nico dragged her hand up his back, to his neck, and patted her lap in suggestion. Zephyr resisted only for a moment before his head bouldered down onto her thighs. The rock shelf wobbled under his weight, then settled. They used to sit like this when they were younger, venting and ranting about life.
As Zephyr stared out at the breathtaking view, the words rolled out of him. “Before Father and I set out for his caravan last year, he warned me that his people didn’t approve of same-side relationships. I didn’t listen. I fooled around with a boy who had joined our caravan. They caught us, and they . . . they stoned him dead in front of me.”
Nico grew horrified at Zephyr’s description of the event.
“I would have been dead too if my father hadn’t gotten me out of there. And I . . . ever since I’ve felt so fucking helpless. I couldn’t protect your jih. I almost got him killed because I couldn’t listen, again. And every time I think about the purge, I get so angry because there’s nothing I can do to protect my family from it. Sometimes it feels as if I’m there again, watching that boy die, and helpless to do anything about it. It was all my fault, Nico.”
Zephyr pressed his hands to his face, and Nico held him as he cried into her lap. Nico felt partly to blame for this. She had stretched him too thin. She never would have asked so much of him had she known. She should have been there for him. She should have been a better friend.
“Why didn’t you tell me the night of the Forging? Why would you ever think I’d look at you differently?”
“Because now you know my father’s people are pieces of shit too, just like my tah’s. There’s nothing good about me.”
“Zephyr,” Nico said softly. She combed her fingers through his coiled hair. He didn’t like anyone but family touching the curly strands, but the tension leaked from his shoulders when she massaged her nails through his scalp. “You know that’s not true.”
Zephyr wiped at his face and sat up hunched beside her. “All I’ve ever wanted was to be your equal. To no longer be stuck at the border. I wanted to be someone you can be proud of, and not the tent kid, or the halfling, but someone who can help you change the world. But I’ve messed everything up. Forgive me.”
“No, Zephyr. Forgive me. I have been the selfish one. I have been the one wrapped up in my own shroud. You are good. You’ve done good,” Nico insisted. “Now it’s my turn.”
Nico had been chasing after someone who didn’t want her help and hadn’t asked for it, all while there were lives depending on her actions. Maybe this hunt wasn’t a failure after all.
Nico had finally caught the person who truly needed her.