Alice stood near the Ship Gate in Grosvenor Park, her shoulders flung back, her head held high, chewing her lower lip, waiting for Seb to arrive. She could smell the heady perfume of roses and was reminded of that first time she had seen him. Suddenly he was coming towards her with that loose-limbed stride of his, and she experienced that familiar marshmallow feeling inside her.
Sebastian took her hand. ‘You all right? You look—’
‘Upset? I am upset.’ She had not meant to say that and could have bitten her tongue off.
He looked concerned, his dark eyes gazing at her intently. ‘What is it? You didn’t say why it was so urgent we met this evening.’ He held her hand tightly. ‘I haven’t much time. We’re going back to Liverpool later.’
Alice was hurt. ‘I’ve seen so little of you lately and now I need you, all you have to say is that you’re going back to Liverpool.’
His forehead creased in a frown. ‘Is this about your father? Ma told me that Hannah said something about your seeing him. Are you certain it was him?’
Alice burst out, ‘Of course, I’m sure! Do you think I’m stupid or blind?’ She clung to his arm. ‘You must take me away, Seb. Get me out of Chester. I’m scared he’ll find me and make me go with him and make my life a misery like he did in the past. I’m scared he’ll separate us and I’ll never see you again.’ Her eyes were wild in her blanched face.
‘OK, luv. Calm down.’ He put an arm about her shoulders and hugged her against him. ‘You know I wouldn’t let him hurt you. Let’s get walking or you’ll end up getting cold. There’s a bit of a breeze off the river this evening.’ He had much on his mind and was finding it difficult to accept that Alice could be so scared of her father, when he didn’t even know where she was living. Of course it was always possible that she’d mistaken someone else for her father and was worrying about nothing.
‘But you know what he’s like! He just might—’
‘Beat me into pulp?’ He smiled, gazing down into her anxious face. ‘I’m prepared to take my chances.’ His lips brushed against hers. Then he removed his arm, took hold of her hand and began to walk towards the ornamental gardens.
‘I don’t want you to take chances,’ she said vehemently. ‘I don’t want ever to see him again. I’ve felt guilty about taking his money when he was unconscious but now I realise that was stupid of me. He didn’t deserve any consideration from me. If he finds me, though, he… he…’ She stopped, unable to go on, and gazed up into Seb’s frowning face. ‘Maybe we could live in Liverpool! There must be plenty of motor engineering yards over there.’
She felt the sudden tension in him. ‘I wouldn’t be able to earn the kind of wage to support a wife if I left the Waters’ and did what you suggest. It’s not that I don’t want to marry you, there’s nothing I’d like more, but it would have to be-’
She felt a deep disappointment and interrupted him. ‘You wouldn’t even consider leaving the Waters’, that’s what you’re going to say, isn’t it?’ Her tone was bitter.
He sighed. ‘At the moment I have to stay. Ma doesn’t even know this yet, but Mr Waters’ business interests in the cotton trade are in trouble. A bloke he took on last year has lost him a helluva lot of money. He acted like a loony! Paying for cotton before it was actually loaded on the ship and checked out in America. The harvest was a failure, so there’s no cotton and the bloke with the money has disappeared. Mr Waters is planning on getting rid of the house and staff in Liverpool except for me, and he and Miss Victoria are moving in with his mother. I can’t leave him when he’s said he doesn’t want to lose me and is prepared to carry on paying me the same wage.’
Alice’s spirits plummeted. Seb move over here! Once that would have made her happy but not now. ‘Why didn’t you tell him that wasn’t what you wanted?’
He looked at her with disappointment in his eyes. ‘I thought you’d be pleased at me coming to live over here. And I accepted his offer because it’s what I want,’ he stressed. ‘I’m to be his right hand man, general dog’s body, running him here and there, standing shoulder to shoulder with him at the cotton exchange and helping at the farm when necessary. I’d hate to spend all my time tinkering with motor engines. So once and for all will you forget that idea.’
He had silenced her.
‘Don’t look like that, Alice. It’ll all work out for the best.’ His voice had softened and his eyes pleaded with her.
She looked up at him, unable to understand his attitude. ‘A general dog’s body! What you mean is he’ll carry on treating you like a lackey, a slave.’ Her voice shook with the strength of her despair. ‘Do this, do that, run here, run there. Are you sure you’re not only prepared to put up with that because you’re in love with Miss Victoria?’
He stared down at her as if she had run mad. ‘That’s a ridiculous thing to say. I love you.’
Only one thing would prove it to her at that moment. ‘I want you to leave the Waters’,’ she said, struggling to keep her voice level. ‘I don’t want to live in that house with them and your mother. I want us to get away from Chester. I want us to have our own dear little place just the two of us – well, three, with Tilly.’
‘Tilly?’ He looked incredulous. ‘You expect me to find a job in a trade I’ve no training for, a house and to support three of us. On what exactly?’
‘I… I know it’s a lot to ask but you could do it if you wanted.’
His eyes met hers and they were hard. ‘I don’t want, Alice. I want you but not on your terms.’ He reached for her hands. ‘You’re overwrought, and I understand. But if you met Ma then maybe we could sort something out so we could be together and you’d no longer fear your father.’
She shook her head. Seeing her father had really shaken her. And, if she was honest, so had Sebastian’s continued loyalty to the Waters’ and refusal to do what she asked. She felt that he didn’t love her enough and that she would always be playing second fiddle to Miss Victoria.
‘Mr Waters and Miss Victoria are good people, Alice. As for Ma, she’s wanted to meet you for some time,’ he said earnestly. ‘I know she can be a bit scary if you don’t know her but all you’ve got to do is to stand up to her, be yourself; she’ll respect you for it.’
Alice let his words sink in, but she knew her weaknesses. She wasn’t very good at standing up to people, and what Hannah had said about his mother had left her feeling she would never be able to match up to Gabrielle. She sounded such a strong, colourful character who, if she wanted something, went all out to get it. She would insist on Alice becoming a Catholic and that would be a betrayal of all her mam had suffered for her faith.
Alice drew away from him. ‘I’m going home. I think that perhaps we shouldn’t see each other again,’ she said in a small voice.
He looked dismayed. ‘That’s not funny, Alice.’ He attempted to take her hand but she snatched it back.
‘It wasn’t meant to be funny. It’s a goodbye.’ She turned and walked away.
‘Alice, don’t be like this!’ Seb followed her, seized her by the shoulder and forced her round to face him.
She would not look at him. ‘It’s over.’ She wrenched herself free, then, knowing she was about to give way to tears, ran. But she need not have worried that he would try and stop her again. He let her go, although he did call after her, ‘Remember, Alice, I didn’t want it to be like this. I love you.’
She could only think that he didn’t love her as much as he loved Miss Victoria Waters.
‘That’s the tenth time you’ve looked out of the window,’ said Hannah, taking the flat iron off the coals and spitting on it. She rubbed the surface of the iron over an old rag before placing her work blouse on the folded towel on the table. She felt so sorry for Alice, despite believing she had gone about things the wrong way. Although, if she were honest with herself, she would want to believe that, if a man loved her as much as Sebastian said he loved Alice, then he would turn the world upside down if necessary to make her happy. But real life, more often than not, didn’t live up to one’s dreams.
‘I think Seb’s got the message now that you meant what you said. The only thing that would convince him that you didn’t, would be for you to write to him, care of the Waters’.’
Alice swallowed the lump in her throat and let the curtain fall back into place. He had been round to the apartment twice while she was out. ‘I can’t do that. He cares about them too much. Besides, I’m not looking for him. I’m… just watching people. You want to see this woman’s hat. I’d swear she has a whole bird on it. If I was to be watching out for anyone it’s my father.’
Hannah almost dropped the iron. ‘That’s a stupid thing to do. The action might be party to bringing him here. Telepathy! That kind of thing! You’re best not thinking about him at all. Or if you must, imagine him in a dark hole and shutting a manhole on him.’
‘You’ve said that before,’ said Alice crossly, fidgeting with a button on her frock. ‘I know you’re only trying to make me feel better but it’s not helping.’
Hannah glanced in Kenny’s direction and he shook his head. ‘OK. You believe she saw him so that’s good enough for me.’
‘I keep wondering why did God let him survive when he’s such a horrible man!’ moaned Alice, now sprawled in a chair, reaching for the hat she was making. Life had lost its savour since she had finished with Sebastian and the hours seemed to drag by. ‘I wonder how long Dad’s been back,’ she murmured, threading a needle with navy blue thread. ‘At least he won’t know I stole his money. He was out for the count and, if your mam couldn’t remember his pushing her down the stairs, then he might have forgotten how he came to be in Scotland and on that train.’
‘Let’s hope you’re right,’ said Hannah, suddenly overwhelmed by a longing to see her own family. The other Sunday, she had acted on impulse and gone along to the mission hall where Joy, Grace and Freddie attended Sunday school, hoping to catch sight of them but they hadn’t been there.
She was startled out of her reverie by Alice bursting out with the words, ‘He might have guessed I took it! You said your mother did remember some things. If he remembers me being with him in the Isle of Man, he’ll work it out. That’s why he’s back in Chester.’ She dug the needle into the fabric with a trembling hand. ‘He’s big on an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. His God is the one from the Old Testament.’
Hannah placed the flat iron on the fire again and went and placed an arm round her. ‘He’s not going to find you, so stop worrying. We’re all going to be fine.’ Alice turned and hugged her back, praying that she was right. ‘What are we doing later? Nothing interesting I suppose.’
Kenny looked up from the boot he was mending, a couple of tacks in his mouth.
‘Sorry.’ She smiled wanly. ‘I know I’m like a bear with a sore head these days.’
Hannah moved away and took up the iron again. ‘How about you making us all a cup of tea?’ she said with a cheerful smile.
Alice returned the smile. ‘Right you are!’ Hannah was often right. How was her father going to find her when he had no idea where she lived these days?
Mal stood in the doorway of the tobacconist shop out of the rain. The bowler sat awkwardly on his cropped hair but, so far, no one had recognised him. He had grown a beard and taken to wearing a pin-striped suit and a collar and tie every day of the week. Eudora Black had said it always amazed her how clothes could so change a body. She had sent a detective up north to find out what had happened to him. Once she had discovered he had survived the accident that had cracked his skull, broken his shoulder and wrist, she had reserved a seat on the next train to Glasgow. By then Mal had left the hospital but she had set her bloodhound on the trail, asking questions, until he got the right answers and found out where he was living. Then she’d done battle to get him away and now here he was back in Newtown.
He drew back into the shadows as Susannah Kirk came out of the fried fish shop. He had been watching her for a fortnight. Hannah was the one he had wanted to talk to but, so far, he hadn’t seen sight or sound of her. He was convinced, though, that sooner or later one of the Kirks would lead him to his daughter. And when he found her… His face set like granite and he flexed his fingers. Alice had to learn not to break the rules; she had to honour and obey him if she wanted to live to a ripe old age. If it hadn’t been for her friend visiting Eudora and being persuaded to spill the beans, he would never have worked it out that it was his daughter who had robbed him.
Now where was the bitch going? Back home by the look of it! Standing on the corner of the street, he listened to her calling to her two younger girls to stop Freddie splashing in a puddle. She called them twice but whatever she said the third time brought them running. They all went into the house, and, as it looked like the rain was set for the rest of the evening, Mal decided to call it a day.
Susannah placed her shopping basket on the table and eased her back, which still caused her discomfort at times. ‘If you’re to have your treat, then you’ve all to be good.’
‘Can’t we go with you tomorrow?’ asked Grace, gazing up at her. ‘I don’t understand why we can’t see our Hanny. I know I didn’t want to go when she first went there but it’s been ages and ages!’
‘Shut up, Grace. Mother has her reasons,’ said Joy, holding Freddie still on the dining chair by clamping her arms about his shoulders and pressing down. Bright as a button, he was now attending elementary school, but, once set free of its confines, it was as if he had ants in his pants and had to be permanently on the move until bedtime when he went out like a light. It was hard work, keeping an eye on him. But Susannah cared for him most of the time and, even when she went to Moreton, she seldom spent the night there. The times she did were generally after Dah came in late. Then they went for each other hammer and tongs, their arguments revolving around that woman. Once Jock had smashed all the crockery and then stormed out of the house. It had frightened Grace when he did that but Joy calmed her down, saying it was probably only a one-off as it would cost money to keep replacing the crockery.
‘Aunt Joan can’t cope with youngsters anymore,’ said Susannah firmly, thinking she had enough of a job herself. She felt the flush warming her from head to toe. They were worth a sovereign, her mother used to say.
‘Why doesn’t Hanny ever come and see us?’ It wasn’t the first time Grace had asked that question, but she had yet to get an answer that satisfied.
‘She doesn’t love us anymore.’ Bert’s mournful voice from the doorway caused their heads to turn.
Susannah’s face broke into a smile. ‘Had a hard day, son?’
‘No different than any other.’ Bert kissed his mother’s cheek. ‘I’d love to see Hanny, too. Why don’t we all go and visit her in Moreton?’
Susannah reproached him with a look, glancing up as she unpacked the shopping. He knew Hannah wasn’t there. It was naughty of him to tease. ‘You can’t be that flush, son, to be paying out on rail fares.’ Having served his time as an apprentice, he now earned a man’s wage and had bought a bicycle several weeks ago.
‘Perhaps not.’ He shrugged.
‘You could bicycle there,’ said Grace, her eyes shining. ‘You could give me a ride on the crossbar.’
‘I could,’ he said solemnly.
‘Don’t you dare!’ cried Susannah, alarmed.
‘And I could sit on the carrier above your back mudguard,’ said Freddie, eyes bright, jigging about on the chair. ‘I’d need a cushion.’
‘Enough,’ thundered their mother. ‘None of you is having a ride on Bert’s bike.’
Freddie piped up again. ‘Bert, you could make me a little cart and I could sit in it, you could pull me along behind you.’
Susannah laughed. She couldn’t help it. ‘That’s enough! I’m going to cook tea. Joy, you can peel and slice the potatoes for scollops to have with the chops. Grace, you set the table.’
‘Can I go out and play again?’ asked Freddie, his head on one side. He had recently had all his curls cut and was no longer the cherub Hannah would have remembered.
‘No! You can wash your mucky knees, hands and face. Then recite your three times table to me while I fry the chops.’
Jock arrived home to find his family, all sitting round the table, waiting for him. ‘You’re late!’ Susannah’s face was unsmiling.
‘We were just thinking of starting without you, Dah,’ chimed Freddie.
Jock sprayed him with the raindrops from his cap. His youngest son giggled and shouted at him not to do it again.
‘Get your coat off and wash your hands,’ ordered Susannah.
‘You don’t have to tell me,’ he murmured, catching her eye. ‘I wasn’t planning on sitting in my wet things or eating with mucky hands. If you thought about what you said more, we’d argue less.’
‘It’s not me that wants to argue,’ she said sharply, folding her arms across her pinny.
‘Then don’t start,’ he said gruffly, before going into the scullery. Bert smiled at his mother. The girls glanced in the direction of the open scullery door. Freddie picked up his fork and stabbed a scollop. His mother told him sharply to wait. She reached for the teapot, removing the hand-knitted tea-cosy, and began to fill Jock’s cup, slopping the tea in the saucer. She knew it would annoy him, also that he would know she had done it deliberately. It was a petty thing to do, but she didn’t care. He had gone out after tea yesterday evening and twice last week he had done the same. He hadn’t given her any excuses for why he was late. She suspected he knew where that Taylor woman had moved to and was visiting her.
Jock kept his anger under control and, as soon as the meal was over, he donned his damp coat and cap and went out. He knew it would drive Susannah up the wall, but he no longer cared. He had done as she had asked and given up Nora ages ago, determined to be home nights, having let Hanny down. He had kept a good eye on his eldest son, and Bert didn’t seem to be putting a foot wrong. Although the way he sucked up to his mother sometimes turned Jock’s stomach. Bert had sworn to his father, one night after one of those arguments with Sue, that he loved Hanny, that he loved all his family. That he hated listening to his parents arguing. Jock had heard that about loving all his family before, but now he prayed that Bert had learnt his lesson, and that he had got it into his thick skull that the love he felt for his sisters, meant Hands off! That any decent bloke never forced a woman against her will. Part of being a brother was to protect his sisters from the kind of man who did what he’d done to Hanny. He prayed again that his words had gone in. Jock wanted Hanny back, living under his roof. It wasn’t right that she had to stay away because of Bert. A neighbour had let drop that he had seen Hanny with Kenny and Alice in New Brighton. He had wondered how she had met them again and whether they now lived in the seaside resort. Anyway, he had started to go there, walking along the Egg and Ham Parade and its back streets, hoping to spot his daughter. So far he’d had no luck.
That evening was no different.
In bed that night he got the customary cold shoulder from his wife. He could have told her the truth but she never mentioned Hanny to him, keeping up this pretence that she was living with Joan. It appeared to him that she no longer cared about her daughter. It was a strain doing without his marital rights but he looked upon it as punishment for what he had allowed to happen to his daughter. When he awoke, it came as no surprise to discover that Susannah had already left the house to visit her cousin.
‘Why won’t she take us with her, Dah?’ Grace was bold enough to ask, as he ate the salt fish Joy had boiled up for him. ‘It would have been lovely having a day out today.’ She glanced out the kitchen window. Yesterday’s rain had cleared overnight and the sun was shining.
Bert glanced at Jock. ‘You doing anything today, Dah?’
‘Maybe.’ He pushed his plate aside and getting up, left the kitchen.
‘Are you doing anything, Bert?’ asked Grace, sitting down in her father’s place. She reached for a slice of bread and mopped up melted butter and tiny morsels of fish.
‘I thought I’d go out on the bike.’
‘To Moreton? Take me with you!’ said Grace, her tone eager.
‘You know what Mother would say to that,’ said Joy, frowning at her.
‘Bert would look after me, wouldn’t you, Bert?’ Grace looked at her brother.
He smiled, but made no reply.
Joy cleared the table and took the crockery into the scullery. Freddie followed her out. ‘Maybe Dah would take us somewhere?’
She smiled down at him. ‘There’s no harm in asking.’
Freddie left her and ran upstairs. She filled the kettle to wash the dishes, then put it on the fire, and went in search of her father and younger brother.
They were in her parents’ bedroom. Jock had just finished knotting his tie, and reached for his Sunday suit jacket.
‘He’s going to New Brighton,’ Freddie informed her, sitting cross-legged on his mother’s pillow.
Suddenly frightened, Joy sank onto the bed. What was he doing going to New Brighton all spruced up? Could he be meeting that woman?
‘Take us with you, Dah?’ she said rapidly. ‘It’ll be nicer for you if you have us with you.’
‘I’ve already asked him,’ said Freddie.
Jock turned towards his middle daughter. ‘I said “Aye!” lass. So yer’d better get yerself ready. Go tell Grace, as well.’
Delight flooded Joy’s face. She kissed her hand and blew the kiss towards him. Then she hurried downstairs. The kettle was steaming but there was no sign of Grace or Bert in the kitchen. Neither were they in the scullery or parlour. She called down the yard but got no answer. She ran to the lavatory just to make sure there was no one there. Then she noticed Bert’s bicycle was missing, and her heart sank. She went back inside.
Jock had removed the kettle from the fire to the hob. ‘She’s gone out for a ride on Bert’s bicycle,’ she said, her worried chubby face turned up to her dah’s. ‘Will we go without her? I’d rather not but… but if she’s gone there’s nothing we can do about it, is there, Dah?’
Jock thought for a moment. Out in the fresh air, amongst people, his youngest daughter should be safe with her elder brother. ‘We’ll wait for half an hour, and if they haven’t turned up by then, we’ll go.’
‘Promise,’ said Freddie, swinging on his father’s hand.
Jock promised.
The half hour passed quickly and was spent by Joy in changing into her Sunday best; a pink frock with a black flounce at the hem and black puffed sleeves. She tried not to worry about Grace, deciding that her father would have gone to look for them if he was worried. When Bert and Grace still hadn’t returned, Joy said with a sigh, ‘They must have gone to Moreton, Dah. They both said they wanted to go and see Hanny.’ Jock decided there was nothing he could do in the circumstances and wondered what Sue would tell Grace about Hanny when she got there, but that was up to his wife. He would tell Joy a watered down version of the truth, not mentioning Bert’s name. She was no longer a child and it was time Sue told both girls a few facts of life and warned them that there were men in this world who would try and take advantage of their innocence.