Poems to Mulgrave and Scroope

This group of poems probably has its origins in the tensions that existed in the early 1670s between ‘Court Wits’ – aristocrats such as Dorset, Buckingham and Sedley who surrounded Rochester, and who wrote largely for their own satisfaction and amusement – and professional writers who earned their living through the pen, such as Shadwell and, pre-eminently, Dryden. Dryden inevitably regarded his writings with a greater seriousness than the ‘Court Wits’ did theirs, and this rendered intolerable to them his criticism of earlier writers such as Shakespeare, Jonson and Fletcher for faults that were evident in his own work (see Dryden’s ‘Defence of the Epilogue’ appended to The Conquest of Granada (1672) and Rochester’s An Allusion to Horace (1675/76)).

Dryden’s transfer of interest from Rochester (to whom he had dedicated his Marriage à-la-Mode in 1673) to the haughty and unamiable Earl of Mulgrave (to whom he dedicated Aureng-Zebe in 1675) helped to solidify by the middle of the decade a literary partisanship that consisted of the ‘Court Wits’ on the one hand and Dryden and Mulgrave on the other, with the courtier Sir Carr Scroope drifting from the edges of Rochester’s circle to a similar position in relation to Dryden’s.

These literary factions developed an increasingly political dimension after Buckingham, released from most of his Court posts by Charles II in 1674, allied himself with the Marquis of Halifax and the Earl of Shaftesbury, the leading opponents of the King’s policies. Thus Buckingham, with Rochester and others of their circle, found further common cause in ranging themselves against the politically ambitious Mulgrave and those who remained loyal to the King and, especially, the Roman Catholic Duke of York – a bipolarity that would be formalised by the end of the decade as the ‘Whig’ and ‘Tory’ parties.

Ephelia to Bajazet
[by Sir George Etherege]

How farre are they deceiv’d who hope in vaine,
A lasting Lease of joys, from Love t’obtaine?
All the deare sweets, wee promise or expect,
After Enjoyment, turnes to cold neglect:
Cou’d Love, a constant happinesse have knowne,     5
The mighty wonder had in me beene showne;
Our Passions were soe favoured by Fate,
As if she meant ’em an Eternall Date;
Soe kind he look’d, such tender words he spoke,
’Twas past beliefe, such Vows shou’d e’re be broke!     10
Fixt on my Eyes, how often wou’d he say,
He cou’d with pleasure, gaze an Age away!
When thoughts too greate for words had made him Mute,
In kisses, he wou’d tell my hand his Suite;
Soe fierce his Passion was, soe farr above,		15
The Common Gallantryes, that pass for Love;
At worst I thought, if he unkind shoud prove,
His Ebbing Passion, wou’d be kinder farr,
Than the First Transports, of all others are:
Nor was my Love, weaker or lesse than his,     20
In him I center’d all my hopes of Blisse!
For him my Duty to my Friends forgot,
For him I lost, alas, what lost I not!
Fame, all the valuable things of life
To meete his Love, by a lesse name than Wife!     25
How happy was I then, how dearely blest,
When this greate Man, lay panting on my Breast,
Lookeing such things, as ne’re can be exprest!
Thousand fresh lookes, he gave me evry Houre,
Whilst greedily I did his lookes devoure,     30
Till quite or’ecome with Charmes, I trembling lay,
At ev’ry looke he gave, melted away.
I was soe highly happy in his Love,
Methoughts, I pitty’d them that dwelt above.
Thinke then, thou greatest, lovelyest, falsest Man,		35
How you have vow’d, how I have lov’d, and then
My faithlesse deare, be cruell if you can!
How I have lov’d, I cannot, need not tell,
Noe ev’ry Act has showne, I lov’d too well:
Since first I saw you, I nere had a thought,     40
Was not intirely yours, to you I brought,
My Virgin Innocence, and freely made,
My love an Off’ring to your Noble Bed:
Since when, y’ave beene the Starr, by which I steer’d,
And nothing else but you I lov’d, or feard;     45
Your smiles I only live by, and I must,
When e’re you frowne, be shatter’d into Dust.
Oh! can the coldnesse that you shew me now,
Suite with the Generous heate you once did shew!
I cannot live on pitty, or respect,		50
A thought soe meane, wou’d my whole frame infect,
Lesse than your Love, I scorne Sir to expect.
Let me not live in dull indiff’rency,
But give me Rage enough, to make me dye!
For if from you, I needs must meete my Fate,     55
Before your pitty, I wou’d choose your hate.

The three satires against Mulgrave printed together here, ‘Ephelia to Bajazet’, followed by ‘A very Heroicall Epistle In answer to Ephelia’ and ‘Epigram upon my Lord All-pride’, form a ‘linked-group’ with the satire on Scroope, ‘On Poet Ninny’, in some early MSS and 1680. For an exhaustive examination of the ‘linked-group’, see Vieth, Attribution, pp. 322–52, and Gyldenstolpe, pp. 330–1.
    The names ‘Bajazet’ and ‘My Lord All-Pride’ were applied satirically to John Sheffield, third Earl of Mulgrave and later first Duke of Buckingham, and Normanby (1647–1721). The form of ‘Ephelia to Bajazet’ and ‘A very Heroicall Epistle’ imitates the verse letters of Ovid’s Heroides. Heroides 1–15 consist of imaginary complaints by forsaken heroines; 16–21 are three pairs of verse letters from heroes, and their lovers’ replies. The Heroides were much translated during the Restoration and immediately after.
Title: Bajazet: Bajazeth was the Turkish sultan defeated by Tamburlaine.
Authorship: Probably by Sir George Etherege, although Love suggests that ‘stylistically it could easily be the work of the woman poet, Ephelia’ (see James Thorpe, ed., The Poems of Sir George Etherege (Princeton, 1963), pp. 79–82; Love, p. 426).
Date: After May 1674 (see note to line 44) but probably written around July–August 1675 (see note to line 53 in following poem, and Poems on Affairs of State: Augustan Satirical Verse, 1660–1714, ed. George deF. Lord, 7 vols (1963–75), I, p. 342).
Copy-text: Yale MS Osborn b 105, pp. 340–3.
First publication: Female Poems on Several Occasions. Written by Ephelia (London, 1679), pp. 104–106.
Departures from copy-text: 7 were] are 15 fierce] greate 20 weaker or] or fondnesse 51 frame] Love

A very Heroicall Epistle In answer to Ephelia

Madam.
If you’re deceived, it is not by my cheat,
For all disguises are below the great.
What Man or Woman upon earth can say
I ever us’d ’em well above a day?
How is it then that I inconstant am?		5
He changes not, who alwayes is the same.
In my dear self, I center every thing,
My Servants, Friends, my Mistress, and my King,
Nay Heaven and earth to that one point I bring.
Well-manner’d, honest, generous and stout,		10
(Names by dull Fools to plague mankind found out)
Should I regard, I must my self constrain,
And ’tis my maxim to avoid all pain.
You fondly° look for what none e’re could find,		foolishly
Deceive your self, and then call me unkind;		15
And by false reasons would my falshood prove,
For ’tis as natural to change as Love.
You may as justly at the Sun repine
Because alike it does not alwayes shine.
No glorious thing was ever made to stay,		20
My Blazing Star but visits and away;
As Fatal too, it shines as those i’th’ skies,
’Tis never seen but some great Lady dies.°		achieves orgasm
The boasted favour you so precious hold
To me’s no more than changing of° my gold.	obtaining change from	25
What e’re you gave, I paid you back in bliss,
Then where’s the obligation, pray, of this?
If heretofore you found grace in my eyes,
Be thankful for it, and let that suffice.
But Women Beggarlike, still haunt the door		30
Where they’ve receiv’d a Charity before.
O happy Sultan! whom we barbarous call,
How much refin’d art thou above us all!
Who envies not the joys of thy Serrail!
Thee, like some God, the trembling crowd adore,		35
Each man’s thy slave, and Woman-kind thy Whore.
Methinks I see thee underneath the shade
Of golden Canopies supinely laid;
Thy crowching slaves all silent as the night,
But at thy nod all active as the light.		40
Secure in solid Sloath thou there dost raign,
And feel’st the joys of love without the pain.
Each Female courts thee with a wishing eye,
While thou with awful pride walk’st careless by,
Till thy kind pledge at last mark’s out the Dame		45
Thou fanciest most to quench thy present flame.
Then from thy bed submissive she retires,
And thankful for the grace no more requires.
No loud reproach, nor fond unwelcome sound
Of Womens tongues thy sacred ear dares wound.		50
If any do, a nimble Mute straight tye’s
The true love knot, and stops her foolish cries.
Thou fear’st no injur’d Kinsman’s threatning blade,
Nor Midnight ambushes by Rivals laid.
While here with aking hearts our joys we taste		55
Disturb’d by Swords like Damocles his feast.

Authorship: Attributed to Rochester in Bodleian MS Don. b 8; National Library of Ireland Dublin, MS 2093; and 1680.
Date: Probably July or August, 1675.
Copy-text: A Very Heroical Epistle from my Lord All-Pride to Dol-Common ([London], 1679).
First publication: As copy-text.
Departures from copy-text: Title and address before line 1 supplied from Kungliga Biblioteket, Stockholm, MS Vu. 69 [‘Gyldenstolpe’ MS]. 42 the] thy 48 the] thy

Epigram upon my Lord All-pride

Madam om.
Bursting with pride the loath’d Impostume° swel’s,	purulent swelling, abscess
Prick him he shed’s his venom strait, and smel’s,
But is so lewd,° a Scribler that he writes	common, low, vulgar
With as much force to nature as he fights.
Harden’d in shame, ’tis such a baffled° Fop	disgraced, dishonoured	5
That every School-boy whips him like a Top.
And with his arm and heart his brain’s so weak,
That his starv’d fancy, is compell’d to rake
Among the excrements of others wit
To make a stinking meal of what they shit.		10
So Swine for nasty meat to dunghills run,
And toss their gruntling Snouts up when they’ve done.
Against his stars the Coxcomb ever strives,
And to be something they forbid contrives.
With a red Nose, splay-foot, and goggle eye,		15
A plowman’s looby° meen, face all awry,	loutish
With stinking breath, and every loathsome mark
The Punchinello set’s up for a Spark.°	fop
With equal self-conceit he takes up arms,
But with such vile successe his part perform’s,		20
That he burlesque’s his trade, and what is best
In others, turn’s like Harlequin to jest.
So have I seen at Smithfield’s wondrous fair
(When all his Brother Monsters flourish there)
A lubbard° Elephant divert the Town	big, clumsy	25
With making legs and shooting off a gun.
Go where he will he never find’s a Friend,
Shame and derision all his steps attend,
Alike abroad, at home, i’th Camp and Court
This Knight o’th’ burning pestle makes us sport.		30

Authorship: The only attribution, to Scroope (Edinburgh University MS Dc. 1 3/1), is unreliable, but the possibility of Rochester’s authorship is strengthened by the attribution of ‘On Poet Ninny’ to him and the echo of the phrase ‘looby meen’ (l. 16) in the anonymous ‘Rochester’s Ghost’ (c. 1682): ‘I’ll speak not of his slouching Looby Mien, | Altho it is the worst that e’er was seen’ (Vieth, Attribution, pp. 348–50).
Date: Probably autumn 1679 (see note to line 25).
Copy-text: A Very Heroical Epistle from my Lord All-Pride to Dol-Common ([London], 1679).
First publication: As copy-text.
Departures from copy-text: 1 Impostume] Imposture 17 With stinking] A filthy 21 his] the 22 to jest] tojest
Title: See notes to ‘Ephelia to Bajazet’ above.

From An Essay on Satyr
[by John Sheffield, Earl of Mulgrave, and John Dryden]

Rochester I despise for his meere want of Witt,
Though thought, to have a Tayle, and cloven Feete.
For while he mischeife meanes to all Mankind,
Himselfe alone the ill effect does fynd,
And soe, like Witches, justly suffers Shame,
Whose harmeless Malice is so much the same.		235
False are his Words affected, as his Witt,
Soe often he does ayme, soe seldome hitt.
To ev’ry Face he cringes, whilst he speakes,
But when the Back is turn’d, the head he breakes.
Meane in each Motion, Lewd in ev’ry Limbe;		240
Manners themselves are mischeavous in him;
A proofe, that chance alone makes ev’ry Creature
A very Killegrew without good nature;
For what a Bessus hath hee alwayes liv’d?
And his owne kicking notably contriv’d.		245
For there’s the Folly, that’s still mixt with Feare,
Cowards more blows, then any Heroe beare:
Of fighting Sparkes some may their pleasure say,
But ’tis a bolder thing, to runn away.
The World may well forgive him all his ill,		250
For every fault does prove his Penance still.
Falsely he falls into some dangerous noose,
And then as meanely labours, to gett loose.
A life soe infamous, it’s better quitting,
Spent in base injuring, and low submitting.		255
I’de like, to have left out his Poetry,
Forgott allmost by all, as well as Wee.
Sometymes he hath some humour, never Witt,
And if it ever (very rarely) hitt,
’Tis under soe much nasty rubbish Layd,		260
To fynd it out,’s the Cynderwomans trade,
Who for the Wretched Remnants of a Fire
Must toyle all day in Ashes, and in Mire.
Soe leudly dull his idle workes appeare,
The wretched Text deserves noe Comment here,		265
Where one poore thought’s sometymes left all alone,
For a whole page of dullness to atone.
’Mongst forty bad’s one tolerable Line
Without expression, fancy, or designe.

Authorship: Mulgrave and Dryden; attributed to Dryden by Rochester (Letters, p. 232) and in first printed edition, but claimed by Mulgrave as his own on the title-page of Essay upon Poetry, 2nd edn. (London, 1685).
Date: Between July 1679, when George Savile (1633–95) was created an earl, and November 1679, when Wood reported the poem circulating in London (Poems on Affairs of State, ed. Lord, I, pp. 396–401).
Copy-text: Bodleian MS Don. b 8, pp. 638–9.
First publication: The Fourth (and Last) Collection of Poems, Satyrs, Songs, &c (London, 1689).
Departures from copy-text: 230 Rochester:] Rocht: 235 so much] just

An Epistolary Essay Very delightful and Sollid from M:G: to O:B: Upon their mutuall Poems

Deare friend
I hear this Towne does soe abound
With Sawcy Censurers, that faults are found
With what (of late) Wee (in Poetick Rage
Bestowing) threw away on the Dull Age,
But howsoever Envy their Spleenes may raise,		5
To Robb my Browes, of the deserved bayes,
Their thancks at least I merrit, since through me
They are partakers of your Poetry,
And this is all I’le say in my defence
To obtaine one line of your well worded Sence		10
I’de be content t’ have writ the Brittish Prince,
I’me none of those who thinck themselves inspir’d
Nor write with the vaine hope to be admir’d
But from a Rule I have (upon long tryall)
T’avoyd with care all sorts of selfe deniall		15
Which way soe ere desire and fancy lead,
(Contemning Fame) that Path I boldly Tread,
And if exposing, what I take for Witt
To my deare self a pleasure I begett
Noe matter though the Censuring Critticks frett,		20
Those whom my Muse displeases are at strife
With equall spleene against my Course of Life
The least delight of which I’de not foregoe,
For all the flatt’ring prayse man can bestow;
If I designed to please, the way were then		25
To mend my manners, rather than my Pen
The first’s Unaturall, therefore unfitt
And for the second I despaire of it
Since Grace is not soe hard to gett as Witt
Perhapps ill Verses ought to be confin’d,		30
In meer good breeding like unsav’ry Winde
Were Reading forc’t I should be apt to thinke
Men might noe more write scurvily, than stinck
But t’is your Choyse whether you’le Read or noe
If likewise of your smelling it were soe;		35
I’de fart just as I write, for my own Ease
Nor should you bee concern’d unlesse you please,
I’le own that you write better than I doe,
But I have as much neede to write as you,
What though the Excrement of my dull braine		40
Runs in a harsh, insipid, tedious straine
Whilst your Rich head, Eases it self of Witt
Must none but Civitt Catts have leave to Shitt?
In all I write, should sence, and Witt, and Rhyme
Faile me at once, Yet something soe Sublime		45
Shall Stamp my Poem, that the World may See
It could have beene produc’t by none but me
And that’s my end, for Man can wish noe more
Than soe to write as none ere writt before
Yett why am I noe poett of the times?		50
I have allusions Similes and Rhymes,
And Witt or elce tis hard that I alone
Of the whole Race of Mankinde should have none—
Unequally the partiall hand of Heaven
Has all, but this one onely Blessing given		55
The World appeares like a great familly°	household
Whose Lord opprest with Pride and Poverty
That to a few great plenty he may shew
Is faine to starve the numerous traine below;
Just soe seemes Providence as poore and Vaine		60
Keeping more Creatures than it can Maintaine
Here t’is profuse and there it meanly saves,
And for one Prince, it makes ten Thousand Slaves
In Witt alone ’t has beene Magnificent°	‘royally’ lavish or munificent
Of which soe just a Share to each is sent		65
That the most Avaritious are Content
For none ere thought (the due divisions such)
His owne to little, or his friends too much;
Yett most men shew, or find great want of Witt,
Writing themselves, or judging what is writ;		70
But I who am of Sprightly Vigour full
Looke on Mankinde as Envious and dull
Born to my self, my self I like alone
And must conclude my Judgment good or none
(For shoud my Sence be naught how could I know		75
Whether another mans be good or no?)
Thus I resolve of my owne Poetry,
That ’tis the best, and ther’s a fame for me.
If then I’m happy, what does it advance
Whether to merit due, or Arrogance?		80
Oh but the World will take offence thereby
Why then the World shall suffer for’t not I,
Did ere this Sawcy World and I agree
To lett it have it’s beastly Will of me?
Why should my prostituted Sence be drawne,		85
To every Rule, their Musty Customes spawne?
But men will Censure you; ’tis two to one
When ere they censure, they’l be in the Wrong
Ther’s not a thing on Earth, that I can name
Soe foolish and soe falce as Common fame		90
It calls the Courtier Knave the plaine Man Rude
Haughty the Grave, and the delightfull Lewd
Impertinent the Brisk, Morose the Sadd,°	grave, serious
Meane the Familiar, the Reserv’d one Madd,
Poore helplesse Woman is not favoured more		95
She’s a Sly Hypocrite, or Publique Whore,
Then who the Devill would give this—to be free,
From the Innocent° reproach of Infamy;	silly, half-witted
These things consider’d make me in despite
Of Idle Rumour, keep at home and Write.		100

Confusion about the purpose of the poem has been rife from the beginning, and is epitomised by Pinto’s reading it as autobiography and Vieth’s interpreting it as a satiric depiction of Mulgrave’s persona. Vieth’s persuasive arguments have not, however, met with universal assent (they are detailed in David Farley-Hills, Rochester’s Poetry (London, 1978), pp. 127–31, and Thormählen, pp. 338–44).
Title: M:G: . . . O:B:: Mulgrave and Dryden (suggestions for what ‘O.B.’ stands for include Ovidius or Orpheus Britannicus, Old Bays, and Oliver’s Bard (Love, p. 429)).
Authorship: Attributed to Rochester in National Library of Ireland MS 2093; Harvard fMSS Eng 623 & 636; Yale MS Osborn PB VI/58; Bodleian MS Don. e 176 (‘L^d R.’); Leeds MS Lt. 54 (‘E. of R:’); Nottingham University MS Portland PwV 40 (‘E:R:’); Yale MS Osborn b 105 (‘L^d: R:’); 1680; and 1691.
Date: Autumn 1679, when the Mulgrave-Dryden An Essay on Satyr was circulating in London.
Copy-text: Yale MS Osborn b 334 [‘Hartwell’ MS], pp. 163–7.
First publication: 1680.
Departures from copy-text: 1 I hear] It seemes 2 Censurers] Censures 3 Rage] Rage) 5 howsoever] though perhaps 21 Those] These 25 to please] pleasing 53 Of the] Of . . . the 75 shoud] could 76 Whether] Whither 79 me.] me 80 Whether . . . due] Whither . . . dew 81 thereby] hereby 82 shall] must 99 me in] me 100 Write.] Write

In defence of Satyr
[by Sir Carr Scroope]

When Shakespeare, Johnson, Fletcher rul’d the Stage,
They tooke soe bolde a freedome with the Age,
That there was scarce a Knave, or Foole in Towne,
Of any Note, but had his picture showne;
“And without doubt, though some it may offend,		5
“Nothing helps more, then Satyre, to amend
“Ill Manners, or is trulyer Virtues Freind.
“Princes may Laws ordayne, Preists gravely preach,
“But Poetts most successfully will teach;
For as a passing-Bell frights from his meate		10
The greedy sick Man, that too much would eate:
So, when a Vice ridiculous is made,
Our Neighbours shame keepes Us from growing bad.
But wholesome remedyes few Palates please;
Men rather love, what flatters their disease.		15
Pimps, Parasites, Buffoons, and all the Crew,
That under Freindships name weake Man undoe,
Find their false Service kindlyer understood,
Then such, as tell’s bold trueths, to doe us good.
Looke, where you will, and you shall hardly find		20
A Man without some sickness of the mynd.
In vaine We wise would seeme, while ev’ry Lust
Whisks us about, as Whirle-wind doeth the Dust;
How for some needless gayne a wretch is hur’ld
From pole to pole, and slav’d about the World,		25
While the reward of all his paines, and care
Ends in that despicable thing his Heyre.
There a vaine Fopp morgages all his land,
To buy that gaudy-play-thing a Command,
To ride on Cock-Horse,° weare a Scarfe att’s Arse,	child’s stick with a horse’s head	30
And play Jack-pudding° in a May-day Farse.	buffoon, merry andrew
Here one, whom God, to make a Foole, thought fitt
In spite of providence will bee a Witt;
But wanting strength, t’uphold his ill-made choyce,
Setts up with leudness, blasphemy, and noyse.		35
There, att his Mistress feete a Lover Lyes
And for a Tawdry-paynted-Baby dyes,
Falls on his Knees, adores, and is afrayd
Of the Vaine Idoll, he himselfe has made.
These, and a thousand Fooles unmention’d here,		40
Hate poetts all, because they Poetts feare.
Take heed, they cry, yonder Mad-Dogg will bite,
He cares not whom he falls on, in his fitt;
Come but in’s way, and streight a new Lampoon
Shall spread your mangled Fame about the Towne.		45
But why am I this Bugbeare to you all,
My penn is dip’t in noe such bitter Gall:
He, that can rayle att one, he calls his freind,
Or heare him absent wrong’d, and not defend,
Who, for the sake of some ill-natur’d Jeast		50
Tells, what he should conceale, invents the rest,
To fatall midnight frolicks can betray
His brave Companions, and then runn away,
Leaving him, to be murd’red in the Streete,
Then put it off with some Buffoon-Conceit.		55
This, this is he, you should beware of all,
Yet him a witty pleasant Man you call;
To whett your dull debauches, up, and downe
You seeke him, as Fop-Fidlar of the Towne.
But if I laugh, when the Court Coxcombs show,		60
To see that Booby Sotus dance Provo,°	i.e., provost, assistant fencing-master
Or chattering Porus from the side-Box grinn,
Trick’t, like a Ladyes Monkey new made cleane,
To mee the name of Rayler streight you give,
Call mee a Man, that knows not how to live.		65
But Wenches to their keepers true shall turne;
Stale Mayds of Honour proffer’d Husbands scorne;
Great states-men flattery, and Clinches hate,
And long in Office dye without Estate;
Against a Bribe Court-Judges shall decide;		70
The Citty Knavery want, the Clergy pride;
E’re that blacke Malice in my Rimes you fynd,
That wrongs a Worthy Man, or hurts his Freind.
But then, perhaps you’le say; why doe you write?
What you call harmeless Mirth, the World calls spight.		75
Why should your Fingers Itch, to have a lash
At Simius° the Buffoone, or Cully° Bash?	ape (Lat.) / woman’s dupe
What is’t to you, if Alidores fine Whore
F— with some Fop, whil’st he’s shutt out of doore?
Consider, pray, that dangerous Weapon Witt		80
Frights a Million, where a few you hitt:
Whip but a Curr, as you ride through a Towne,
And straight his fellow-Currs his quarrell owne.
Each Knave, or Foole, that’s Conscious of a Crime,
Though he ’scapes now, lookes for’t another tyme.		85
Sir, I confess, all you have sayd, is true;
But who has not some Folly, to pursue?
Milo turn’d Quixott fancy’d Battells, Fights,
When the fifth Bottle has increas’t the heights;
War-like durt-pyes, our Hero Paris formes,		90
Which desperate Bessus without Armour stormes.
Cornus, the kindest Husband e’re was borne,
Still Courts the Sparke, that does his Brows adorne,
Invites him home, to dine, and fills his Veynes
With the hott bloud, which his deare-Doxie draynes.		95
Grandio thinks himselfe a Beau-Garçon,
Goggles his Eyes, writes letters up, and downe,
And with his Sawcy Love plagues all the Towne,
Whilst pleas’d, to have his Vanity thus fed,
Hee’s caught with Gosnell that old Hagg a bed.		100
But why should I the crying Follyes tell,
That rouze the sleeping Satyr from his Cell?
I to my Reader should as tedious prove,
As that old Sparke Albanus making Love,
Or florid Roscius, when with some smooth flamm		105
He gravely on the publick tryes to shamm.°	take in, decaive
Hold then, my Muse, ’tis tyme, to make an end,
Least taxing others thou thy selfe offend.
The World’s a Wood, in which all loose their Way,
Though by a different Path each goes astray.		110

Authorship: Attributed to Scroope in Yale MS Osborn b 54.
Date: Probably the summer or autumn of 1676, following the death of Captain Billy Downs on 27 June (see note to lines 48–59).
Copy-text: Bodleian MS Don b 8, pp. 710–12.
First publication: 1680.
Departures from copy-text: 61 Sotus] Solus 62 Porus] Ponis 62 grinn] grinm 63 new] ne’re 65 how] how, 78 Alidores] ? Alidons 86 you] I 90 War-like] Warlick 106 tryes] tryes,

On the supposed Author of a late Poem in defence of Satyr

To rack, and torture thy unmeaning brain		out of tune
in Satyrs praise, to a low untuned° strain,
In thee was most Impertinent and vaine.
when In thy person wee more cleerly see
Satyrs are of Divine authority;		5
For god made one on Man, when hee made thee.
To shew there are some Men, as there are apes,
Fram’d for mere sport, whoe differ but in Shapes;
In thee are all those Contradictions Join’d
that make an Ass prodigious and refin’d:		10
A lump deformed, and Shapeless wert thou borne,
Begott in loves despight, and Natures scorne.
And art grown up the most ungracefull Wight		15
Harsh to the ear and hideous to the Sight:
Yett love’s thy bussiness, beauty thy delight.
Curse on that Silly-howre that first inspir’d
Thy madness to pretend to bee admir’d;
to paint thy grizly face, to dance, to dress,		20
And all those awkard follyes that express
Thy loathsome love, and filthy daintiness:
who needs wilt bee an ugly Beau-Gerson;°	beau garçon (Fr. ‘handsome boy’)
Spitt att, and shun’d by every girl in Towne;
where dreadfully loues Scarecrow thou art plac’d,
to fright the tender flock, that love to tast:
While every coming maid, when you appeare,		25
Starts back for Shame, and Strait turnes chast for feare,
for none soe poore, or prostitute have prov’d,
where you made love, t’endure to bee beloved.
T’were labour lost, or else I would advise,
but thy halfe witt will ne’re lett thee bee wise:		30
Halfe witty, and halfe mad, and scarce halfe brave,
Halfe honest, which is very much a knave.
Made up of all these halves, thou canst not pass
For any thing entirely, but an Asse.
Rochester

Authorship: Attributed to Rochester in the copy-text; British Library Add. MS 28955; National Library of Ireland MS 2093; University of Edinburgh MS Dc. 1 3/1; Harvard University fMSS Eng 623 & 636; and Yale MS Osborn b 54.
Date: Probably before the end of 1676, as the poem by Scroope that it answers, ‘In defence of Satyr’, makes reference to the death of Captain Billy Downs from wounds on 27 June (see Vieth, Attribution, pp. 159–60).
Copy-text: Nottingham University MS Portland Pw V 40, f. 41^v.
First publication: 1680.
Departures from copy-text: 1 rack] work corr. 1 they] thy corr. 3 is] was corr. 4 thy] they corr. 15 twice thy] they corr. 18 thy] they corr.

Answer by way of Epigram
[by Sir Carr Scroope]

Raile on poore feeble scribler! Speake of mee
In as bad term’s as the whole world speak’s of thee:
Sitt Swelling in thy hole like a vex’d Toad,
And full of Pox, and Malice Spitt aBroad.
Thou canst blast noe Man’s fame with thy ill word,		5
thy penn is full as harmeless as thy Sword.
Scroope

Authorship: Attributed to Scroope in the copy-text; British Library Add. MS 28955; Bodleian MS Don. e 176; National Library of Ireland MS 2093; University of Edinburgh MS Dc. 1 3/1; Harvard University fMS Eng 623; and Harvard University fMS Eng 636 (‘S.S.C.’).
Date: Between summer 1676 and summer 1677 (see Vieth, Attribution, pp. 161–2).
Copy-text: Nottingham University MS Portland Pw V 40, f. 42^r.
First publication: The Weekly Pacquet of Advice from Rome: or, The History of Popery, 16 April 1680.

Lett.
[by Sir Carr Scroope]

Madam I cannot chang as others doe
Though you unjustly scorne,
Since that poore swaine that sighs for you
For you a love was borne.
No Phillis, no your heart to move		5
A surer way Il’e try,
And to reveng my slighted love
Will still love on, will still love on and dye.

When killd with grief Aminto lies
And you to mind shall call		10
The sighs that now unpitted rise,
The tears that vainly fall,
That welcom hour that ends his smart
Will then begin your paine,
For such a faithfull tender heart		15
Can never break, can never break, in vaine.

Authorship: Attributed to Scroope in Yale MS Osborn b 105.
Date: Probably between November 1676 and January 1677, when Scroope was wooing Cary Frazier (see Vieth, Attribution, pp. 235–8).
Copy-text: Nottingham University MS Portland Pw V 40, f. 36^v.
First publication: Choice Ayres & Songs (London, 1679).
Departures from copy-text: punctuation editorial 3 Since] Sine

Answer

I Fuck no more then others doe
I’m yong and not deformd,
My tender heart sincear and true
Desires not to be scornd.
Why Phillis then why will you swive°	have intercourse with	5
With forty lovers more?
Can I said she with nature strive?
Alas I am! Alas! I am a w—re.

Were all my Body Larded ore
With darts of Love so thick		10
That you may find in evary pore
A well stuck standing P—k,
While yet a lone my eyes were free,
My heart would never doubt
In amarous rage and extacie		15
To wish those eyes, to wish those eyes fuckt out.

Authorship: Attributed to Rochester in 1680.
Date: Probably between November 1676 and January 1677, when Scroope was wooing Carey Frazier (see Vieth, Attribution, p. 235).
Copy-text: Nottingham University MS Portland Pw V 40, f. 37^r.
First publication: 1680.
Departures from copy-text: punctuation editorial 1 than] then 9 Were] Ware 13 were] ware

On Poet Ninny.

Crusht by that just contempt his Follys bring
On his Crazd Head, the Vermin faine wou’d sting;
But never Satyr, did soe softly bite,
Or gentle George, himself, more gently write.
Borne to noe other, but thy owne disgrace,		5
Thou art a thing soe wretched, and soe base,
Thou canst not ev’n offend, but with thy face:
And dost at once, a sad Example prove,
Of harmlesse Malice, and of hoplesse Love.
All Pride, and Uglinesse! Oh how wee loath,		10
A nauseous Creature soe compos’d of both!
How oft’ have wee thy Cap’ring Person seene,
With dismall looke, and Melancholly Meene?
The just Reverse of Nokes, when he wou’d be,
Some mighty Heroe, and make Love, like thee.		15
Thou art below being laught at, out of spight,
Men gaze upon thee, as a hideous sight,
And cry, there goes the Melancholly Knight.
There are some Modish Fooles, wee dayly see,
Modest, and dull; why they are Witts to thee!		20
For of all Folly, sure the very topp,
Is a conceited Ninny, and a Fopp.
With Face, of Farce, joyn’d to a head Romancy,°		filled with romantic notions
There’s noe such Coxcomb, as your Foole of fancy.
But ’tis too much, on soe despis’d a Theame;		25
Noe Man, wou’d dabble in a dirty Streame:
The worst that I cou’d write, wou’d be noe more,
Then what thy very Friends have said before.

Title: Shadwell satirised Edward Howard as ‘Ninny’ in The Sullen Lovers (1668), a part played by James Nokes, the leading comic actor with the Duke’s Company; here applied to Scroope.
Authorship: Attributed to Rochester in 1680.
Date: Probably early 1678; Vieth suggests a reference to it in a letter of John Verney dated 25 April (Attribution, pp. 348–9).
Copy-text: Yale MS Osborn b 105, pp. 348–9.
First publication: 1680.

44 Starr, by which I steer’d: probably a reference to Mulgrave’s Order of the Garter, which has a star as part of its insignia. Invested in the Order on 28 May 1674, he was said to have been inordinately proud of this honour.

7 G. deF. Lord (POAS, I, p. 345) thinks this may be a hit at Dryden, whose dedication of Aureng-Zebe (London, 1676) to Mulgrave includes the following:

True greatness, if it be any where on Earth, is in a private Virtue; remov’d from the notion of Pomp and Vanity, confin’d to a contemplation of it self, and centring on it self. (sig. A4^r)

21 My Blazing Starr: see ‘Ephelia to Bajazet’ above, note to l. 44. Love points out that comets were believed to foretell the death of a monarch (Love, p. 427).
    An additional piece of evidence that Mulgrave is the ‘speaker’ of this poem is the note Narcissus Luttrell wrote in his copy of the 1679 broadside now in the Newberry Library, Chicago: ‘Against the Lord Mulgrave’.

38–41 supinely laid . . . Secure in solid Sloath: perhaps an anticipation or recollection of Dryden’s ‘spread in solemn state, supinely reign’ (Mac Flecknoe, l. 28).

46 thy present flame: Griffin (p. 65) compares Edmund Waller’s ‘Of Love’, lines 27–30:

    Should some brave Turk that walks among
His twenty Lasses bright and young,
And beckens to the willing Dame
Preferr’d to quench his present flame . . .
                                                 (Poems, &c. (London, 1645), p. 117)

53–4 Wilson (Court Wits, pp. 30–1, 117–18) suggests a reference to Mulgrave’s duel (4 July 1675) with Percy Kirke, whose sister Mall Kirke was said to be Mulgrave’s mistress (as well as mistress of the Duke of York and the Duke of Monmouth). Monmouth ‘set a guard’ about her lodgings (September 1674), caught Mulgrave, and ‘had him sent to spend a night in the guardshouse’.

56 Damocles: Damocles was a member of the court of Dionysius, the fourth-century BCE tyrant of Syracuse. To show him the true nature of a tyrant’s life, Dionysius placed before him a splendid banquet with a sword suspended over his head by a single hair.

18 Punchinello: puppet character of Italian origin. The show appeared in London soon after the Restoration.

22 Harlequin: character in Italian comedy who seeks the affections of Columbine.

25 Elephant: Vieth (p. 143) quotes Robert Hooke concerning a visit on 1 September 1679 to the annual Bartholomew Fair at Smithfield, so called because it opened on St Bartholomew’s Day, 24 August: ‘Saw Elephant wave colours, shoot a gun, bend and kneel, carry a castle and a man, etc.’ (Diary, ed. Henry W. Robinson and Walter Adams (London, 1935), p. 423). Love suggests that Hooke was seeing this for the first time, and that might suggest a later, rather than earlier, date (Love, pp. 425–6).

30 Knight o’th’ burning pestle: alluding to Francis Beaumont’s comedy (?1607). ‘Pestle’, probably pronounced ‘pizl’, quibbles on ‘pizzle’, a bull’s penis; with ‘burning’ it suggests the pox, and Vieth suggests that ‘burning’ may also refer to Mulgrave’s red nose.

243 Killegrew: both the dramatist Thomas Killigrew, whom Rochester once scandalously assaulted in the King’s presence, and his son Henry were noted for their good humour.

244 Bessus: a coward in Beaumont and Fletcher’s King and No King.

249 to runn away: a reference to the disturbance at Epsom on 15 June 1676, which resulted in the death of Captain Downs, who had been deserted by Rochester and his other companions.

6 bayes: leaves or sprigs from the bay (or laurel) tree woven into a garland to reward a conqueror or poet, hence figuratively the fame and repute attained by these.

11 Brittish Prince: Edward Howard’s epic The Brittish Princes: an Heroick Poem was published in 1669.

43 Civitt Catts have leave to Shitt: a civet cat has a sac or gland in its anal pouch giving an unctuous substance smelling of musk. It is used for making scent.

97 —: ‘probably implying a gesture such as snapping the fingers’ (Vieth, p. 147).

48–59 A portrait of Rochester, making reference to the brawl at Epsom on 17 June in which he and his companious were involved. One of them, Captain Downs, was wounded fatally, and the ‘Buffoon-Conceit’ is plausibly Rochester’s Verses to the Post Boy.

61 Sotus: ‘Probably pseudo-Latin for “sot” (Lord, POAS, I, 367)

62 Porus: ‘The Latin . . . means a passage of the body . . . The name seems to suggest a sort of sponge-like creature (Lord, ibid.)

78 Alidores: glossed as ‘Sir John Abdy’ in Yale MS Osborn b 54

88 Milo: famous wrestler of Ancient Greece. Quixott: Don Quixote, eponymous hero of the novel (1605–15) by Cervantes.

90 paris: son of King Priam of Troy who abducted Helen, the wife of King Menelaus of Sparta, and caused the Trojan War.

91 Bessus: the boastful coward in A King and No King (1611) by Beaumont and Fletcher.

100 Gosnell: Winifred Gosnell, actress in the Duke’s Company from 1663.

104 Albanus: ironic reference to 3rd c. CE English martyr. The Earl of St Albans was a noted lecher.

105 Roscius: Quintus Roscius Gallus (d. 62 BCE) – notable Roman comic actor.

11 deformed, and Shapeless: bear-cubs were supposedly born so, and had to be ‘licked into shape’ by their mother (Love, p. 433).

4 George: Sir George Etherege.

18 Melancholly Knight: ‘An implied comparison with Don Quixote as “the knight of the sorrowful countenance”, Scroope, as a baronet, had inherited his knighthood’ (Love, p. 434).